BRIAN POLIKOWSKY


Gigi is 7, going to be 8 in 2 weeks and has been gaming online for just over a year.
She has some great unschooling friends and this group of friends has met other friends in the last couple months.

They  hang out together, talk all day, play all day in several games and have a grand time.

A couple months ago they started having disagreements online and they would fight and get upset and make up.
It is pretty dramatic. But it all works out in the end.

Me and one of the moms were worried about them and we talked to the kids to help them. I have since realized that that is how
it is. They fight, make up, get jealous, support each other, have disagreements, fall in love all over again.
I still talk to Gigi, give ideas, listen and  support her.

 They are pretty great girls. I know the parents of a few of them and they send stuff on the mail to each other and are planning to meet and visit each other.
It is all pretty sweet  and sometimes a  little dramatic.

Now they have made friends with a few more kids online and they play with them on a regular basis. These kids seem great. I hear them play and  they
are  pretty cool. Sure some cannot play every day because they have school. They sneak sometimes  because parents don;t let them talk all the time.

Well they have the same kind of interactions as the original group. They fight and make up, get jealous, are supportive of each other.
Last night Gigi was in tears. She was very very upset. She was talking to one of her friends that was being very sweet and supportive.
So when she hung up I asked her what happened and she told me another friends said she was going to go commit suicide.
Gigi does not know why but she believed her friend for some reason.

Yes sometimes they write they are going to kill themselves or they wish the other to die on a big ball of fire and the next line they are making up and being friends again.
But for some reason Gigi believed this friends was indeed going to do it.
I asked who it was and how old she was. Gigi said she was 10.
Now I do not know this kid's parents because they know this kid from a server and not the group of unschoolers I know.

My question is  what to do. Gigi seems to want me to help out and talk to her mom. She said she does not know why this girl wanted to commit suicide.
 Hey it is always a possibility and I  cannot guarantee that she will not.
I did say  that many people will say it when they are upset and sad but won't do it .


Any ideas?
 
Alex Polikowsky
 
 
 

<plaidpanties666@...>

>>Yes sometimes they write they are going to kill themselves or they wish the other to die on a big ball of fire and the next line they are making up and being friends again.
But for some reason Gigi believed this friends was indeed going to do it.<<


If there's a way to get in touch with her parents, do that and tell them what you wrote here. 

You could also come up with some idea for Gigi - things she could say to her friend next time. I don't mean that Gigi should become her counselor, but she could say things like "would you like to talk to my mom? maybe she could help". Here are a couple links on suicide prevention:
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/suicide_prevention.htm


http://www.health.ny.gov/prevention/injury_prevention/children/fact_sheets/10-19_years/suicide_prevention_10-19_years.htm

Karen

>>>>>> Yes sometimes they write they are going to kill themselves or they wish the other to die on a big ball of fire and the next line they are making up and being friends again.<<<<<

I may be too sensitive here, and would appreciate any input if it is thought to be detrimental to my relationship with Ethan.

I have asked Ethan to not take sentiments like "I'm going to kill myself" or "I'm going to kill you" too lightly. Also, not to use them too casually himself either.

A friend of Ethan's used to say that he was going to kill himself when he failed in games they were playing together. It really bothered Ethan. I spoke with the friend's mom, so that she was aware of what he was saying, and I spoke with our friend myself. I told him that Doug, Ethan and I really cared about him, and when he talks about hurting himself we feel concerned. He cried. I wasn't harsh (I don't think). I told him that he can feel free to talk with us any time he needed to. I told his mom about our exchange. I don't think he was really thinking of hurting himself. He was only nine at the time, but it did bother me to hear him talk that way. I think he was very sad and overwhelmed with things that were going on in his life.

When I was a young girl, not too much older than Ethan, I had a friend who talked regularly about killing herself. On several occasions she went so far as to fake hurting herself to get the attention she was looking for. People began to not take her seriously. She really attempted suicide in our last year of high school. Thankfully she survived, and finally got the help she was needing all along.

I feel like it's risky to not address it when someone talks about suicide, even when it's out of simple frustration. But, as I said, maybe I'm being too sensitive. Input is most welcome.

Karen.

Sandra Dodd

-=-I feel like it's risky to not address it when someone talks about suicide, even when it's out of simple frustration. But, as I said, maybe I'm being too sensitive. Input is most welcome.-=-

There are counseloors of various sorts listed here, none of whom would waste a moment asking you why you didn't have your children in school.