"the last straw"
Sandra Dodd
Marta Pires offered to transcribe part of the sound file on my Parenting Peacefully page, and I picked one three-minute section. It has the bit about unloading half of one's straw, so the next thing isn't "the last straw," and also an intro to making better choices (which I'll post separately).
So that part is on the page now for those without time or patience to hear the whole recording. :-) I'm still glad that recording exists, though!
Thank you, Marta, for doing this!
First part of that transcript:
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I have a story about my sister. My poor sister, you know that�s what she gets for being my sister. She used to call me almost every day and she would just call and kind of complain. Her oldest kid was older than mine so she should�ve known more, but she�s younger so she thought it was my job to hear her problems for the rest of my life, and I still do my duty.
But she would call and she would say �I was so angry about..." this or that little stupid thing, and I�d say �Ok, well you could do this or that or the other."
�Ok, thanks, good idea�.
And the next day, she would call and go �That�s just it! I can�t take it any more �cause I was so angry..." and they were stupid things.
And I said �You know what? Everything is the last straw for you.�
And she said �What do you mean?�
I said �It�s like you have this big load of straw and you take one straw off and then you feel better and you go along until one more little thing happens and it�s the last straw.� And I said �You need to spend some time unloading half of that straw.� Because, you know, she was like that all the time and she was 30 and she didn�t have a good excuse. So, if you don�t have any peace in yourself, how are you going to allow your kids to have some? Because if you don�t have any peace and you�re angry and you�re not sure why and you�re just waiting to see what made you angry, then your kids are not safe, they won�t have peace.
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http://sandradodd.com/parentingpeacefully
[I hid one phrase, because it referred back to another story. If that part is ever transcribed, I'll release the back-reference to view. :-) ]
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
So that part is on the page now for those without time or patience to hear the whole recording. :-) I'm still glad that recording exists, though!
Thank you, Marta, for doing this!
First part of that transcript:
----------
I have a story about my sister. My poor sister, you know that�s what she gets for being my sister. She used to call me almost every day and she would just call and kind of complain. Her oldest kid was older than mine so she should�ve known more, but she�s younger so she thought it was my job to hear her problems for the rest of my life, and I still do my duty.
But she would call and she would say �I was so angry about..." this or that little stupid thing, and I�d say �Ok, well you could do this or that or the other."
�Ok, thanks, good idea�.
And the next day, she would call and go �That�s just it! I can�t take it any more �cause I was so angry..." and they were stupid things.
And I said �You know what? Everything is the last straw for you.�
And she said �What do you mean?�
I said �It�s like you have this big load of straw and you take one straw off and then you feel better and you go along until one more little thing happens and it�s the last straw.� And I said �You need to spend some time unloading half of that straw.� Because, you know, she was like that all the time and she was 30 and she didn�t have a good excuse. So, if you don�t have any peace in yourself, how are you going to allow your kids to have some? Because if you don�t have any peace and you�re angry and you�re not sure why and you�re just waiting to see what made you angry, then your kids are not safe, they won�t have peace.
----------
http://sandradodd.com/parentingpeacefully
[I hid one phrase, because it referred back to another story. If that part is ever transcribed, I'll release the back-reference to view. :-) ]
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
Ah. What comes after that part I just quoted seemed disjoint and I left it out, but I think what I intended to say at the end was "make the more peaceful choice." But I went on to something else, instead. Sorry about that (ten years later :-)
So, the first thing you do, if there’s a loss of cabin pressure, is put the oxygen mask over your own face and then help your child. There’s no sense shoving oxygen over his mouth and yelling “Breathe, I said breathe!” when you’re the one who needs to be doing the breathing! So, every time you have a choice…
Richard Prystowsky:
A common example. It’s a common example. [Because he had used the oxygen-mask example in a talk earlier in the conference, but I hadn't known. :-) ]
Sandra Dodd:
Every time you have a choice…
addition in 2012:
make the more peaceful choice!
So, the first thing you do, if there’s a loss of cabin pressure, is put the oxygen mask over your own face and then help your child. There’s no sense shoving oxygen over his mouth and yelling “Breathe, I said breathe!” when you’re the one who needs to be doing the breathing! So, every time you have a choice…
Richard Prystowsky:
A common example. It’s a common example. [Because he had used the oxygen-mask example in a talk earlier in the conference, but I hadn't known. :-) ]
Sandra Dodd:
Every time you have a choice…
addition in 2012:
make the more peaceful choice!