little boy ... Help!
Brad & Stacey Propst
Ok, help/advice...
Nicholas is 4, and has recently started smackin/hitting at his penis.
(often, like 8-10 times daily)
I have asked him what he is doing...
He tells me he does not like it when it "goes long"
He is turning himself away from me, pulling down his pants and well I am not sure what he is doing.
I have told him that being a little boy it will get longer every now and then, and then will go away.
Which I guess was the wrong thing to say, because then he responded with he wanted to be a girl then.
He is very upset over this, and I am not exactly sure how to handle this, I do not want him to feel ashamed at all...
How normal is this? Anyone have any words of wisdom?
Thanks,
Stacey
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Nicholas is 4, and has recently started smackin/hitting at his penis.
(often, like 8-10 times daily)
I have asked him what he is doing...
He tells me he does not like it when it "goes long"
He is turning himself away from me, pulling down his pants and well I am not sure what he is doing.
I have told him that being a little boy it will get longer every now and then, and then will go away.
Which I guess was the wrong thing to say, because then he responded with he wanted to be a girl then.
He is very upset over this, and I am not exactly sure how to handle this, I do not want him to feel ashamed at all...
How normal is this? Anyone have any words of wisdom?
Thanks,
Stacey
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-He is turning himself away from me, pulling down his pants and well I am not sure what he is doing.-=-
It's partly none of your business. Increasingly, as they years go on, none of your business. :-)
Past telling him it's normal, ask him not to hurt himself, to be more gentle, and to touch himself where other people aren't present.
-=-I have told him that being a little boy it will get longer every now and then, and then will go away.
Which I guess was the wrong thing to say, because then he responded with he wanted to be a girl then. -=-
It's not about being a little boy. It's about having a penis.
If he was a girl, you might mention, he would get feelings too, that might feel odd or itch. Very matter of factly.
"Could you do that in your room, please?" might be a thing to say. (I've said that, years back.)
But about "very upset," I can remember my kids being frustrated at getting older, getting bigger, and wanting to avoid it. Perhaps you could baby him a bit for a while. Make foods he really liked when he was a bit younger, rock him or read to him or whatever he might associate with being two years old. That's just a guess, in case it's a phase of awareness of changing and growing and he's wishing to still be younger.
My boys are grown, but maybe there's a kids' book out and current about it penises, but he might not want to have his mom read it to him. Depends on the relationship and all.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
It's partly none of your business. Increasingly, as they years go on, none of your business. :-)
Past telling him it's normal, ask him not to hurt himself, to be more gentle, and to touch himself where other people aren't present.
-=-I have told him that being a little boy it will get longer every now and then, and then will go away.
Which I guess was the wrong thing to say, because then he responded with he wanted to be a girl then. -=-
It's not about being a little boy. It's about having a penis.
If he was a girl, you might mention, he would get feelings too, that might feel odd or itch. Very matter of factly.
"Could you do that in your room, please?" might be a thing to say. (I've said that, years back.)
But about "very upset," I can remember my kids being frustrated at getting older, getting bigger, and wanting to avoid it. Perhaps you could baby him a bit for a while. Make foods he really liked when he was a bit younger, rock him or read to him or whatever he might associate with being two years old. That's just a guess, in case it's a phase of awareness of changing and growing and he's wishing to still be younger.
My boys are grown, but maybe there's a kids' book out and current about it penises, but he might not want to have his mom read it to him. Depends on the relationship and all.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lisadiana Bates
It bothered one of my boys at about the same age, he went from being in pull ups to underwear. Little boys can get an erection when they need to pee. When he was in pull ups he didn't notice the erection. Just let him know this might be a sign from his body that he might need to go to the bathroom and it's not a big deal. Also, if his underwear are too loose then it might be an irritation and be uncomfortable.