Re: Children addressing adults by their first na mes instead of their titles
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What about this: my husband's father is married to a woman who is not my husband's mother. She is not very kind nor loving in action toward my five children. Quite condescending and irritated mostly. My children tend to stay away from her when she is around. She insists they call her "grammie". They call her by her first name. It seems to upset her, but as my eldest explained to me, "she's not our 'grammie'".
----- Reply message -----
From: "Sandra Dodd" <Sandra@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Re: Children addressing adults by their first names instead of their titles
Date: Tue, Feb 28, 2012 7:50 am
-=If the children
respectfully call that person "Mrs Soandso", why should she decide how they
should call their own mother in her presence? Is that how it works? I don't
get it...-=-
Women are the keepers of culture.
If you don't spank your children why should you get to decide whether others spank their children in your presence?
If you don't insult and threaten your children, why should you get to decide whether others do it to their children (or yours) in your home?
It has long been said (in college courses) that humans have no instincts left, but it's not true. Men's instincts have to do with providing shelter and resources. Women's have to do with keeping peace and order. Because people have moved around and intermarried and made extreme changes in cultures out of conscious decision, and we have millions of people around us instead of a small tribe or a village with a clear hierarchy, things go wonky.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
----- Reply message -----
From: "Sandra Dodd" <Sandra@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Re: Children addressing adults by their first names instead of their titles
Date: Tue, Feb 28, 2012 7:50 am
-=If the children
respectfully call that person "Mrs Soandso", why should she decide how they
should call their own mother in her presence? Is that how it works? I don't
get it...-=-
Women are the keepers of culture.
If you don't spank your children why should you get to decide whether others spank their children in your presence?
If you don't insult and threaten your children, why should you get to decide whether others do it to their children (or yours) in your home?
It has long been said (in college courses) that humans have no instincts left, but it's not true. Men's instincts have to do with providing shelter and resources. Women's have to do with keeping peace and order. Because people have moved around and intermarried and made extreme changes in cultures out of conscious decision, and we have millions of people around us instead of a small tribe or a village with a clear hierarchy, things go wonky.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-My children tend to stay away from her when she is around. She insists they call her "grammie". They call her by her first name. It seems to upset her, but as my eldest explained to me, "she's not our 'grammie'". -=-
Would they compromise on "grammie-first-name"?
Or could you tell her on the side that they don't feel comfortable with that? Just ask them not to say either name. While they're avoiding her, they could also not address her at all, perhaps.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Would they compromise on "grammie-first-name"?
Or could you tell her on the side that they don't feel comfortable with that? Just ask them not to say either name. While they're avoiding her, they could also not address her at all, perhaps.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]