helping a 3 year old read
myung-jin kang
My daughter has been taken an interest in reading so I signed her up for an online reading program to help facilitate the process - learning letters, sounds of letters, and reading some one-three letter words. My daughter is 3.10 years old. We do the online reading program together. She doesn't like it when she gets the wrong answers. The online reading program is multiple choice. When she gets the wrong answer, she would like me to give her the answer. I am wondering how best to facilitate this. I have tried to sing her the choices in a playful way, which helps her figure out the answer herself, but sometimes she gets frustrated and believes she can't do it.
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Joyce Fetteroll
On Jan 10, 2012, at 12:25 PM, myung-jin kang wrote:
Unless she's asking to do it, I wouldn't. She will read when she is developmentally able to. Interest doesn't indicate developmental ability.
And many kids *don't* read by putting letter sounds together. Many kids learn by memorizing whole words. It's only later when they have a huge collection that they're able to break them down into chunks.
Do things that are more in keeping with how humans learn naturally and more in keeping with being 3. 3 yos shouldn't be learning from lessons. Put labels up around the house. Mix them up as a game. Create a box of *her* words that she wants to learn. Don't press her. If she loses interest, let it go.
If someone, adult or child, almost has something figured out, most appreciate having a clue pointed out so they can put it together. But that shouldn't be happening often.
Joyce
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> My daughter has been taken an interest in reading soA 3 yo isn't a better 3 yo by being able to read. A 3 yo is a better 3 yo by being helped to do what fascinates her.
> I signed her up for an online reading program to help
> facilitate the process - learning letters, sounds of letters,
> and reading some one-three letter words. My daughter is 3.10 years old.
Unless she's asking to do it, I wouldn't. She will read when she is developmentally able to. Interest doesn't indicate developmental ability.
And many kids *don't* read by putting letter sounds together. Many kids learn by memorizing whole words. It's only later when they have a huge collection that they're able to break them down into chunks.
Do things that are more in keeping with how humans learn naturally and more in keeping with being 3. 3 yos shouldn't be learning from lessons. Put labels up around the house. Mix them up as a game. Create a box of *her* words that she wants to learn. Don't press her. If she loses interest, let it go.
> When she gets the wrong answer, she would like me to give her the answer.If you repeatedly don't give her the answer when she asks, you're frustrating her unnecessarily. And she'll associate frustration with reading and with you.
If someone, adult or child, almost has something figured out, most appreciate having a clue pointed out so they can put it together. But that shouldn't be happening often.
> I have tried to sing her the choices in a playful way, which helps her figure out the answer herself, but sometimes she gets frustrated and believes she can't do it.What if you were learning how to cook a soufflé and your husband was repeatedly singing you clues instead of telling you the answers when you asked? Would you appreciate it or get irritated with him? How long before you gave up on making a soufflé?
Joyce
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mkangj
She's been asking to read. We just started this program and it's something she likes so far. Thanks for the feedback regarding giving her the answers. Sometimes I wonder if giving her the answers doesn't allow her to come up with the answers herself and I am glad to let go of that thought/question in my head.
--- In [email protected], Joyce Fetteroll <jfetteroll@...> wrote:
>
>
> On Jan 10, 2012, at 12:25 PM, myung-jin kang wrote:
>
> > My daughter has been taken an interest in reading so
> > I signed her up for an online reading program to help
> > facilitate the process - learning letters, sounds of letters,
> > and reading some one-three letter words. My daughter is 3.10 years old.
>
> A 3 yo isn't a better 3 yo by being able to read. A 3 yo is a better 3 yo by being helped to do what fascinates her.
>
> Unless she's asking to do it, I wouldn't. She will read when she is developmentally able to. Interest doesn't indicate developmental ability.
>
> And many kids *don't* read by putting letter sounds together. Many kids learn by memorizing whole words. It's only later when they have a huge collection that they're able to break them down into chunks.
>
> Do things that are more in keeping with how humans learn naturally and more in keeping with being 3. 3 yos shouldn't be learning from lessons. Put labels up around the house. Mix them up as a game. Create a box of *her* words that she wants to learn. Don't press her. If she loses interest, let it go.
>
> > When she gets the wrong answer, she would like me to give her the answer.
>
> If you repeatedly don't give her the answer when she asks, you're frustrating her unnecessarily. And she'll associate frustration with reading and with you.
>
> If someone, adult or child, almost has something figured out, most appreciate having a clue pointed out so they can put it together. But that shouldn't be happening often.
>
> > I have tried to sing her the choices in a playful way, which helps her figure out the answer herself, but sometimes she gets frustrated and believes she can't do it.
>
> What if you were learning how to cook a soufflé and your husband was repeatedly singing you clues instead of telling you the answers when you asked? Would you appreciate it or get irritated with him? How long before you gave up on making a soufflé?
>
> Joyce
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Joyce Fetteroll
On Jan 10, 2012, at 3:44 PM, mkangj wrote:
Your questions here and response to her desire suggest that doing this program is the same as a child saying "I'm thirsty," and the mom handing her a glass of water.
A desire to read doesn't mean a child is developmentally ready. Kids sometimes want to ride a bike before they're able to coordinate all the muscles to make the bike stay upright. All the brain areas needed for decoding text may not yet be mature. And all the instruction in the world will not mature them. Physical growth will do that.
Readiness to read doesn't mean a program will fulfill that need.
If she is ready, instruction isn't necessary. When I first started to read about unschooling, that sounded cruel. Why would anyone withhold a way to do something if a child is asking? But a program isn't a glass of water. It might, in fact, be a glass of sand. And, with regards to reading, she's surrounded by water. She can pick up a glass any time she wants.
I won't be scary and say a program may do more harm than good. But instruction assumes there is A Way to unlock reading. That it is a mechanical process or a matter of memorizing a bunch of rules and then voila! someone's off reading.
It's not that simple. If it were, schools would have 100% success rate with reading.
Each person will put the pieces together in their own unique way that makes sense to them. For instance my daughter Kat wrote a year or so before she could read at 5. (I've heard of several kids who did this.) She recognized many letters at 18 months. She tried several reading programs (like Reader Rabbit) but, though she could do the games, they didn't help her read. They were more a matter of memorization and matching. Those skills didn't connect to decoding.
If she's enjoying what she's doing, there's no harm. But if she or you believe the program will get her to read, that could be damaging in many ways.
When she's asked the question, she *does* have the opportunity to answer. She's choosing to have you answer it. By not giving her the answer when she asks you're not allowing her to draw on the resources she's chosen.
But you are not allowing her to come up with the answers to *reading* herself. You're implying the program is the key and all she has to do is go through it and she'll be reading. It may be far from the truth. The program is leading her down a particular path of information that may not match how she needs to make sense of it all.
Joyce
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> She's been asking to read.But has she been asking to do this program? The desire to read and doing the program are not the same thing.
Your questions here and response to her desire suggest that doing this program is the same as a child saying "I'm thirsty," and the mom handing her a glass of water.
A desire to read doesn't mean a child is developmentally ready. Kids sometimes want to ride a bike before they're able to coordinate all the muscles to make the bike stay upright. All the brain areas needed for decoding text may not yet be mature. And all the instruction in the world will not mature them. Physical growth will do that.
Readiness to read doesn't mean a program will fulfill that need.
If she is ready, instruction isn't necessary. When I first started to read about unschooling, that sounded cruel. Why would anyone withhold a way to do something if a child is asking? But a program isn't a glass of water. It might, in fact, be a glass of sand. And, with regards to reading, she's surrounded by water. She can pick up a glass any time she wants.
I won't be scary and say a program may do more harm than good. But instruction assumes there is A Way to unlock reading. That it is a mechanical process or a matter of memorizing a bunch of rules and then voila! someone's off reading.
It's not that simple. If it were, schools would have 100% success rate with reading.
Each person will put the pieces together in their own unique way that makes sense to them. For instance my daughter Kat wrote a year or so before she could read at 5. (I've heard of several kids who did this.) She recognized many letters at 18 months. She tried several reading programs (like Reader Rabbit) but, though she could do the games, they didn't help her read. They were more a matter of memorization and matching. Those skills didn't connect to decoding.
> We just started this program and it's something she likes so far.Does she ask to do it?
If she's enjoying what she's doing, there's no harm. But if she or you believe the program will get her to read, that could be damaging in many ways.
> Sometimes I wonder if giving her the answers doesn't allow her to come up with the answers herselfIf you were jumping in with the answer before she had an opportunity to, then you'd be not allowing her to come up with the answers herself.
When she's asked the question, she *does* have the opportunity to answer. She's choosing to have you answer it. By not giving her the answer when she asks you're not allowing her to draw on the resources she's chosen.
But you are not allowing her to come up with the answers to *reading* herself. You're implying the program is the key and all she has to do is go through it and she'll be reading. It may be far from the truth. The program is leading her down a particular path of information that may not match how she needs to make sense of it all.
Joyce
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Jenny Cyphers
***... but sometimes she gets frustrated and believes she can't do it.***
She doesn't "believe" she can't do it, she simply can't do it. If the answers are multiple choice and she doesn't know the answers, she will get a certain percentage of them right, just by guessing.
***When she gets the wrong answer, she would like me to give her the answer.***
I hope you are giving her the answer. You state that you do the program together, so answer the problems that she can't. If you are insisting that she get all the answers, then you aren't really doing it together, you are sitting with her making her do it.
***My daughter has been taken an interest in reading so I signed her up for an online reading program to help facilitate the process***
Does she like the program? Are you guys having fun doing it? You don't need any kind of program to help kids recognize the written word. You simply need to be surrounded by it, which we all are. The first word my oldest daughter could read and spell was "stop" because of stop signs. She did that at the same age your daughter is right now. She didn't read fluently until she was 11. There were plenty of times between 3-11 that she wanted, even badly wanted, to be able to read and yet she didn't because her brain was simply not ready yet.
No amounts of reading to her or online reading games would have changed her ability to read faster or sooner. Out of everything we did, video games helped and so did listening to books on tape and cd. They didn't help her read faster, they helped her ability to read when her brain was ready to understand the written word.
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She doesn't "believe" she can't do it, she simply can't do it. If the answers are multiple choice and she doesn't know the answers, she will get a certain percentage of them right, just by guessing.
***When she gets the wrong answer, she would like me to give her the answer.***
I hope you are giving her the answer. You state that you do the program together, so answer the problems that she can't. If you are insisting that she get all the answers, then you aren't really doing it together, you are sitting with her making her do it.
***My daughter has been taken an interest in reading so I signed her up for an online reading program to help facilitate the process***
Does she like the program? Are you guys having fun doing it? You don't need any kind of program to help kids recognize the written word. You simply need to be surrounded by it, which we all are. The first word my oldest daughter could read and spell was "stop" because of stop signs. She did that at the same age your daughter is right now. She didn't read fluently until she was 11. There were plenty of times between 3-11 that she wanted, even badly wanted, to be able to read and yet she didn't because her brain was simply not ready yet.
No amounts of reading to her or online reading games would have changed her ability to read faster or sooner. Out of everything we did, video games helped and so did listening to books on tape and cd. They didn't help her read faster, they helped her ability to read when her brain was ready to understand the written word.
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Yvonne Lyon
There is a site called alphablocks which she may enjoy. I like it because
the games don't tell children that they are wrong, but try to pronounce the
'words' that they have made anyway, so they can see how the letters fit
together to makes sounds.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cbeebies/alphablocks/
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the games don't tell children that they are wrong, but try to pronounce the
'words' that they have made anyway, so they can see how the letters fit
together to makes sounds.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cbeebies/alphablocks/
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Bob Collier
--- In [email protected], Jenny Cyphers <jenstarc4@...> wrote:
Read for pleasure, that's my view, and if it's not a pleasure don't read. Do something else for pleasure and come back to the reading later, or trust that it will take care of itself. My son at three or four much preferred watching TV and playing video games to reading books, so that's what we did. He was a fluent reader by the time he was eight and when he was ready he acquired excellent reading skills very quickly and, in fact, almost incidentally from his great passion for video games.
Bob
>I used to read story books with my daughter every day from when she was a baby and when she was three, maybe four, by which time she was taking over most of the reading, I introduced phonics to her. I told her that knowing phonics would help her discover how to say words she hadn't seen before, most of the time but not all of the time because many words don't sound the same as they look and phonics couldn't be used for those words. This worked really well for both of us. Whenever my daughter encountered a word that couldn't be "sounded out", I told her it couldn't be and gave her the pronunciation straight away. She was otherwise happy to have a go at sounding out new words that could be sounded out, most of the time but not all of the time - sometimes she preferred me to tell her the pronunciation anyway. When you're reading a story you both love to hear, the flow of the story is more important than anything else. That's where my daughter's enthusiasm for reading came from, not from acquiring the ability to read in itself.
> ***... but sometimes she gets frustrated and believes she can't do it.***
>
> She doesn't "believe" she can't do it, she simply can't do it. If the answers are multiple choice and she doesn't know the answers, she will get a certain percentage of them right, just by guessing.
>
>
> ***When she gets the wrong answer, she would like me to give her the answer.***
>
> I hope you are giving her the answer. You state that you do the program together, so answer the problems that she can't. If you are insisting that she get all the answers, then you aren't really doing it together, you are sitting with her making her do it.
>
>
>
Read for pleasure, that's my view, and if it's not a pleasure don't read. Do something else for pleasure and come back to the reading later, or trust that it will take care of itself. My son at three or four much preferred watching TV and playing video games to reading books, so that's what we did. He was a fluent reader by the time he was eight and when he was ready he acquired excellent reading skills very quickly and, in fact, almost incidentally from his great passion for video games.
Bob
Pam Sorooshian
On Wed, Jan 11, 2012 at 5:27 PM, Bob Collier <
bobcollier@...> wrote:
understanding that there are letter/sound connections.
-pam
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bobcollier@...> wrote:
> I told her that knowing phonics would help her discover how to say wordsJust remember that some kids learn to recognize a zillion words before ever
> she hadn't seen before, most of the time but not all of the time because
> many words don't sound the same as they look and phonics couldn't be used
> for those words.>>>
understanding that there are letter/sound connections.
-pam
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Bob Collier
--- In [email protected], Pam Sorooshian <pamsoroosh@...> wrote:
Bob
>Yes, that's right. My daughter was already reading when we started using phonics.
> On Wed, Jan 11, 2012 at 5:27 PM, Bob Collier <
> bobcollier@...> wrote:
>
> > I told her that knowing phonics would help her discover how to say words
> > she hadn't seen before, most of the time but not all of the time because
> > many words don't sound the same as they look and phonics couldn't be used
> > for those words.>>>
>
>
> Just remember that some kids learn to recognize a zillion words before ever
> understanding that there are letter/sound connections.
>
> -pam
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Bob