Not back to school jitters...again
Karen
Well, it is happening again to me this year. Some of our friends are heading back to school, some of our friends are going not back to school. Both are talking about all of the great things they have planned for the year, and, instead of feeling happy for them, I am letting it fill me with doubt and worry about all *those* things we are not doing. We are doing a lot of our own thing, but I am still feeling insecure. We do not have big plans for the year. Our plan is to keep doing what we are doing, which will be lots and lots of fun exploring in our own way.
Our days are full, and fun, and happy. My son really loves what he is doing. Watching him learn has given me the confidence to believe he could learn anything he set his mind to. He is voracious. We all have fun together. Every thing is going really well...so, why am I feeling all these crazy feelings?
In past years, I have allowed this reoccurring struggle of mine to seep into our days and ruin the flow for everyone. I don't want to do this, this year. I would love some suggestions.
Our days are full, and fun, and happy. My son really loves what he is doing. Watching him learn has given me the confidence to believe he could learn anything he set his mind to. He is voracious. We all have fun together. Every thing is going really well...so, why am I feeling all these crazy feelings?
In past years, I have allowed this reoccurring struggle of mine to seep into our days and ruin the flow for everyone. I don't want to do this, this year. I would love some suggestions.
Sandra Dodd
-=-Our days are full, and fun, and happy. My son really loves what he is doing. Watching him learn has given me the confidence to believe he could learn anything he set his mind to. He is voracious. We all have fun together. Every thing is going really well...so, why am I feeling all these crazy feelings? -=-
I don't know, but as a general statement, some people like others to say "good job," and "don't worry." Things like this: http://sandradodd.com/support
If you're worried that you should do more, you shouldn't ignore that voice.
Some moms come to have other moms tell them they're great moms and to just keep doing what they're doing. I'm unwilling to do that, sight unseen, personally.
If you're confident that what you're doing will grow and stretch, rather than settle into a smallness, that's better than if it's "enough."
One thing school teaches people is to squeak by. Even kids who are going to get an A don't need MORE than enough to get an A. And those who are going to settle for a C, or a D, might as well be at the low end of the range as the high end. Those beliefs continue in employment, with people asking what they "have to do" rather than what they *can* or are allowed or encouraged to do.
-=-In past years, I have allowed this reoccurring struggle of mine to seep into our days and ruin the flow for everyone. I don't want to do this, this year. I would love some suggestions.-=-
Why struggle? Add one thing, peacefully and positively. If that seems good, add another. One moment, one thing. Not struggle and ruination.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I don't know, but as a general statement, some people like others to say "good job," and "don't worry." Things like this: http://sandradodd.com/support
If you're worried that you should do more, you shouldn't ignore that voice.
Some moms come to have other moms tell them they're great moms and to just keep doing what they're doing. I'm unwilling to do that, sight unseen, personally.
If you're confident that what you're doing will grow and stretch, rather than settle into a smallness, that's better than if it's "enough."
One thing school teaches people is to squeak by. Even kids who are going to get an A don't need MORE than enough to get an A. And those who are going to settle for a C, or a D, might as well be at the low end of the range as the high end. Those beliefs continue in employment, with people asking what they "have to do" rather than what they *can* or are allowed or encouraged to do.
-=-In past years, I have allowed this reoccurring struggle of mine to seep into our days and ruin the flow for everyone. I don't want to do this, this year. I would love some suggestions.-=-
Why struggle? Add one thing, peacefully and positively. If that seems good, add another. One moment, one thing. Not struggle and ruination.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
plaidpanties666
"Karen" <semajrak@...> wrote:
Some of those feelings come from the fact that you're still learning - learning to trust and learning to be your kid's partner - and that's not a straight line plod toward a goal with nothing but progress. Learning happens in surges forward and sometimes with falling back and forgetting what you once knew. It can help to notice that You're learning and growing, too, as a side effect of unschooling. That's a good thing!
If you're worried, look for more things to strew, more things to offer. If it helps you to have plans, plan for a big outing once a month, maybe - a concert or museum or amusement park or convention or camping trip.... whatever sort of thing your son would enjoy that's in your budget. Plan for other little things weekly. If you need an agenda have it be keeping things fresh and interesting or big and rich.
---Meredith
>> Our days are full, and fun, and happy. My son really loves what he is doing. Watching him learn has given me the confidence to believe he could learn anything he set his mind to. He is voracious. We all have fun together. Every thing is going really well...so, why am I feeling all these crazy feelings?****************
Some of those feelings come from the fact that you're still learning - learning to trust and learning to be your kid's partner - and that's not a straight line plod toward a goal with nothing but progress. Learning happens in surges forward and sometimes with falling back and forgetting what you once knew. It can help to notice that You're learning and growing, too, as a side effect of unschooling. That's a good thing!
> In past years, I have allowed this reoccurring struggle of mine to seep into our days and ruin the flow for everyone. I don't want to do this, this year. I would love some suggestions.******************
If you're worried, look for more things to strew, more things to offer. If it helps you to have plans, plan for a big outing once a month, maybe - a concert or museum or amusement park or convention or camping trip.... whatever sort of thing your son would enjoy that's in your budget. Plan for other little things weekly. If you need an agenda have it be keeping things fresh and interesting or big and rich.
---Meredith
JustSayin
This isn't really advice but I loved this quote and it seems to fit this thread:
"I hope that someday the legend of The First Day of School will be just a dim memory from an unenlightened time."
-- Wendy Priesnitz (on her blog)
Nothing changes for us in August vs. September. And we wouldn't have it any other way. Call it enlightenment (that's what I like to call it ;>) and hope that the rest of the world will catch up to YOU someday.
--Melissa
"I hope that someday the legend of The First Day of School will be just a dim memory from an unenlightened time."
-- Wendy Priesnitz (on her blog)
Nothing changes for us in August vs. September. And we wouldn't have it any other way. Call it enlightenment (that's what I like to call it ;>) and hope that the rest of the world will catch up to YOU someday.
--Melissa
--- In [email protected], "Karen" <semajrak@...> wrote:
>
> Well, it is happening again to me this year. Some of our friends are heading back to school, some of our friends are going not back to school. Both are talking about all of the great things they have planned for the year, and, instead of feeling happy for them, I am letting it fill me with doubt and worry about all *those* things we are not doing. We are doing a lot of our own thing, but I am still feeling insecure. We do not have big plans for the year. Our plan is to keep doing what we are doing, which will be lots and lots of fun exploring in our own way.
>
> Our days are full, and fun, and happy. My son really loves what he is doing. Watching him learn has given me the confidence to believe he could learn anything he set his mind to. He is voracious. We all have fun together. Every thing is going really well...so, why am I feeling all these crazy feelings?
>
> In past years, I have allowed this reoccurring struggle of mine to seep into our days and ruin the flow for everyone. I don't want to do this, this year. I would love some suggestions.
>
plaidpanties666
"JustSayin" <mfcappella@...> wrote:
But a bunch of my facebook friends seem to have "not back to school" rituals where they do something fun to mark the time of year. It *is* a good time to go and do fun, touristy kinds of things, since it's still good and warm but the crowds disappear. If someone's feeling stressed by "back to school" pressure, planning some "not back to school" adventures may be a good way to keep those fears at bay.
---Meredith
>> Nothing changes for us in August vs. September.The school year where I live starts in August and its generally kind of a surprise to us - what do you mean the pool's closed? School? Now?
But a bunch of my facebook friends seem to have "not back to school" rituals where they do something fun to mark the time of year. It *is* a good time to go and do fun, touristy kinds of things, since it's still good and warm but the crowds disappear. If someone's feeling stressed by "back to school" pressure, planning some "not back to school" adventures may be a good way to keep those fears at bay.
---Meredith