OT Nervous habits
Carol
My daughter (age 11) has had a self-described "nervous habit" for a few weeks now. When she is sitting watching TV in the master bedroom or in her bed on her laptop, she will pull out a strand of hair, or maybe several strands, and drop them on the floor next to where she has been sitting. She has ***very*** curly African American hair, and we have always joked about random bits of her hair that I would find on the floor by calling them "hair spiders," because at first glance I'm never sure if I am seeing a spider or a bit of my daughter's hair. Anyway, I began finding more and more of her hair on the floor where she had been sitting, and I finally asked her about it. She said it was just a "nervous habit," and she would try to stop. I asked if there was something in particular that was bothering her, and she laughed it off. I didn't worry about it because my daughter and I have a great relationship and I felt that she would tell me if something was really bothering her. Now I am finding more and more hair on the floor. Should I say something? If she really wants to stop, I'm not sure what to suggest she do to quit. I would appreciate your input.
Carol
Carol
Heather
You or your daughter might find this website helpful....
http://www.trich.org/about/for-kids-teens.html
heather
http://www.trich.org/about/for-kids-teens.html
heather
On Sun, Jul 31, 2011 at 6:01 PM, Carol <mykaylabee@...> wrote:
> **
>
>
> My daughter (age 11) has had a self-described "nervous habit" for a few
> weeks now. When she is sitting watching TV in the master bedroom or in her
> bed on her laptop, she will pull out a strand of hair, or maybe several
> strands, and drop them on the floor next to where she has been sitting. She
> has ***very*** curly African American hair, and we have always joked about
> random bits of her hair that I would find on the floor by calling them "hair
> spiders," because at first glance I'm never sure if I am seeing a spider or
> a bit of my daughter's hair. Anyway, I began finding more and more of her
> hair on the floor where she had been sitting, and I finally asked her about
> it. She said it was just a "nervous habit," and she would try to stop. I
> asked if there was something in particular that was bothering her, and she
> laughed it off. I didn't worry about it because my daughter and I have a
> great relationship and I felt that she would tell me if something was really
> bothering her. Now I am finding more and more hair on the floor. Should I
> say something? If she really wants to stop, I'm not sure what to suggest she
> do to quit. I would appreciate your input.
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Jenny Cyphers
***she will pull out a strand of hair, or maybe several strands, and drop them on the floor next to where she has been sitting***
My roommate in college did that. She knew that she did it, but in the moment of doing it, was totally unaware of it. She would sometimes pluck herself almost bald in spots. When she did that, she'd wear hats. It never interfered with work or relationships. She's traveled the world a bit, is now married and has 3 children. The last I saw her was about a year ago and she looked just as beautiful as she always has! She was on vacation, so I didn't notice any hair pulling out, as she tended to do it when she was extra busy or stressed.
If she wants to stop, she will. If she doesn't, she can find ways to hide it. If it's not interfering with her regular life activities, I'd let it go.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
My roommate in college did that. She knew that she did it, but in the moment of doing it, was totally unaware of it. She would sometimes pluck herself almost bald in spots. When she did that, she'd wear hats. It never interfered with work or relationships. She's traveled the world a bit, is now married and has 3 children. The last I saw her was about a year ago and she looked just as beautiful as she always has! She was on vacation, so I didn't notice any hair pulling out, as she tended to do it when she was extra busy or stressed.
If she wants to stop, she will. If she doesn't, she can find ways to hide it. If it's not interfering with her regular life activities, I'd let it go.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
sheeboo2
Do you think she wants to stop, or do you think she stinks she *should* stop. There's a big difference, I think.
From what I know about tics (both my daughter and brother tic), drawing any attention, whatsoever to them makes them happen more frequently.
If it isn't bothering her, I'd not say anything else, except maybe briefly in an easy-going way, let her know it isn't a big deal and there's nothing wrong with it, but if it ever starts bothering her and she ever wants to talk about it, or have you help her find a way to stop, you will. Also let her know lots of kids do it, and almost all of them outgrow it. I've read that for many girls, it starts around puberty and then tapers off.
For some people tics are worse with stress, but for many, they are actually most frequent during times of relaxation, like when watching a movie.
Brie
From what I know about tics (both my daughter and brother tic), drawing any attention, whatsoever to them makes them happen more frequently.
If it isn't bothering her, I'd not say anything else, except maybe briefly in an easy-going way, let her know it isn't a big deal and there's nothing wrong with it, but if it ever starts bothering her and she ever wants to talk about it, or have you help her find a way to stop, you will. Also let her know lots of kids do it, and almost all of them outgrow it. I've read that for many girls, it starts around puberty and then tapers off.
For some people tics are worse with stress, but for many, they are actually most frequent during times of relaxation, like when watching a movie.
Brie
sheeboo2
You know, I wonder if she hasn't already Googled it? "Nervous habit" seems like something she may have read somewhere, not come up with herself.
Brie
Brie
sheeboo2
------ Do you think she wants to stop, or do you think she stinks she *should* stop.-----
Geesh, I'm sorry. That should read "thinks," not stinks. Darn iPhones.
Brie
Geesh, I'm sorry. That should read "thinks," not stinks. Darn iPhones.
Brie
Carol
> My roommate in college did that. She knew that she did it, but in the moment of doing it, was totally unaware of it.*********************************
>
I believe this is exactly true of my daughter. At the time she plucks, she is totally unaware, but only thinks about it when she notices the hair on the floor later. Thankfully, my daughter has enough hair on her head for three people and she'd have to do some serious pulling before anyone noticed it. Maybe I've zoned in on her habit out of misguided jealousy--I'm recently done with chemo for breast cancer, and I think a lot about the soft, short baby fuzz coming in (so slowly!) on my own head.
;-)
Carol
Carol
> You know, I wonder if she hasn't already Googled it? "Nervous habit" seems like something she may have read somewhere, not come up with herself.Carol, who still wishes she had more hair on her own head...
> ***************************************
>
> When I think back to when I first mentioned this to her, she laughed when she said it was a "nervous habit." I don't necessarily think she had already Googled it, but I think maybe she had already decided it was no big deal. My husband is almost incapable of sitting still, and when he does, he tends to bite his nails. Yet I've never thought of that as a "nervous habit," it's just something he does because he's so full of energy. Maybe this is the same for my daughter, just something she does when she's still. Thank goodness she doesn't have to sit in school all day, or she might be completely bald! I am grateful for everyone's thoughts. As usual, this list challenges my thinking and puts things in perspective.
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
Carol
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] OT Nervous habits
Carol, off topic discussions aren't allowed. If it's about parenting in unschooling families, then it is NOT "OT" (off topic).
Anyone who has a topic that doesn't fit the descriptions for discussions here should not post them.
I pulled my hair out for fun when I was thirteen. I still had a lot of hair, and I don't think making a big deal out of it is good.
When I was that age, too, my cousins and I pulled the hair out of our legs with tweezers while we talked and talked. It didn't hurt us.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] OT Nervous habits
Carol, off topic discussions aren't allowed. If it's about parenting in unschooling families, then it is NOT "OT" (off topic).
Anyone who has a topic that doesn't fit the descriptions for discussions here should not post them.
I pulled my hair out for fun when I was thirteen. I still had a lot of hair, and I don't think making a big deal out of it is good.
When I was that age, too, my cousins and I pulled the hair out of our legs with tweezers while we talked and talked. It didn't hurt us.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-Yet I've never thought of that as a "nervous habit," it's just something he does because he's so full of energy.-=-
That's what a nervous habit is--something someone does because he's full of energy, or stressed, or being made to sit still when sitting still isn't comfortable.
I have been in situations recently where the polite and right thing to do was for me to sit still AND be attentive for an hour, and then another hour, and then another hour. I can't do that. I find real reasons to be up and doing something--getting someone a drink, going on errands--SOMEthing.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
That's what a nervous habit is--something someone does because he's full of energy, or stressed, or being made to sit still when sitting still isn't comfortable.
I have been in situations recently where the polite and right thing to do was for me to sit still AND be attentive for an hour, and then another hour, and then another hour. I can't do that. I find real reasons to be up and doing something--getting someone a drink, going on errands--SOMEthing.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
plaidpanties666
Carol <mykaylabee@...> wrote:
I don't sit still well and tend to figit alot when I sit. I like having something simple to do with my hands - a rubber-band to play with, or a squishy toy. I used to cross-stitch or knit while reading so that I wouldn't bite my nails or pick all the fluff off my sweaters.
---Meredith
>Now I am finding more and more hair on the floor. Should I say something? If she really wants to stop, I'm not sure what to suggest she do to quit.********************
I don't sit still well and tend to figit alot when I sit. I like having something simple to do with my hands - a rubber-band to play with, or a squishy toy. I used to cross-stitch or knit while reading so that I wouldn't bite my nails or pick all the fluff off my sweaters.
---Meredith
m_aduhene
my friend at college did this too. we would all joke about her hair spiders. she doesn't do it now as far as i know (20 years later). she is married with 2 boys and has a good job and is as gorgeous and lovely as when i first met her
blessings
michelle
blessings
michelle
--- In [email protected], Jenny Cyphers <jenstarc4@...> wrote:
>
> ***she will pull out a strand of hair, or maybe several strands, and drop them on the floor next to where she has been sitting***
>
>
> My roommate in college did that. She knew that she did it, but in the moment of doing it, was totally unaware of it. She would sometimes pluck herself almost bald in spots. When she did that, she'd wear hats. It never interfered with work or relationships. She's traveled the world a bit, is now married and has 3 children. The last I saw her was about a year ago and she looked just as beautiful as she always has! She was on vacation, so I didn't notice any hair pulling out, as she tended to do it when she was extra busy or stressed.
>
> If she wants to stop, she will. If she doesn't, she can find ways to hide it. If it's not interfering with her regular life activities, I'd let it go.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>