TV more powerful than the mom?
Sandra Dodd
-=-we are doing alot of movie watch to connect, but the guilt of TV
watching
during the day is something fierce..not to mention the "schoolwork' -=-
What schoolwork?
That question is from South Africa. I got one by e-mail this morning
from Dola in Delhi, India, in which she said, " I went into limitless
TV for my kids about a year back. after much stress about TV issues."
The stress in both those situations comes from arbitrary rules and
school-based anti-TV propaganda. Also, in Dola's case there are two
problems. She's having bouts of complaining and limiting the TV. So
#1, it's not "limitless," but #2, by calling it limitless in her own
head (even while she's limiting it), it seems overwhelming.
"Limitless TV" sounds like a never-ending river of who knows what
all. And in Susan's case, she has divided TV watching into guilty
(daytime) and... something different other times. And it wasn't even
TV! it was "a lot of movie watching to connect."
In both cases (both of which I've read before 6:30 a.m., because of
them being on far-distant time zones) my first impression is that the
mom is looking at the TV instead of at the child.
The links to go with these are The Economics of Restricting TV Watching
http://sandradodd.com/t/economics
and the general TV page, but maybe especially the discussion where Ren
Allen argued against TV and then changed her mind. This was when Ren
was new to unschooling and I love that it's saved.
http://sandradodd.com/t/debate
If the mother is so stressed by TV, it seems she must think it would
stress her kids even more.
If the mother stops being stressed by TV, she might find a great store
of energy and softness that she didn't know she had.
There was a story on another list about a mom relaxing into the dad
watching soccer. If the writer of that would be willing to share it
here, I think it would be very helpful!
Sandra
watching
during the day is something fierce..not to mention the "schoolwork' -=-
What schoolwork?
That question is from South Africa. I got one by e-mail this morning
from Dola in Delhi, India, in which she said, " I went into limitless
TV for my kids about a year back. after much stress about TV issues."
The stress in both those situations comes from arbitrary rules and
school-based anti-TV propaganda. Also, in Dola's case there are two
problems. She's having bouts of complaining and limiting the TV. So
#1, it's not "limitless," but #2, by calling it limitless in her own
head (even while she's limiting it), it seems overwhelming.
"Limitless TV" sounds like a never-ending river of who knows what
all. And in Susan's case, she has divided TV watching into guilty
(daytime) and... something different other times. And it wasn't even
TV! it was "a lot of movie watching to connect."
In both cases (both of which I've read before 6:30 a.m., because of
them being on far-distant time zones) my first impression is that the
mom is looking at the TV instead of at the child.
The links to go with these are The Economics of Restricting TV Watching
http://sandradodd.com/t/economics
and the general TV page, but maybe especially the discussion where Ren
Allen argued against TV and then changed her mind. This was when Ren
was new to unschooling and I love that it's saved.
http://sandradodd.com/t/debate
If the mother is so stressed by TV, it seems she must think it would
stress her kids even more.
If the mother stops being stressed by TV, she might find a great store
of energy and softness that she didn't know she had.
There was a story on another list about a mom relaxing into the dad
watching soccer. If the writer of that would be willing to share it
here, I think it would be very helpful!
Sandra
Susan Steynberg
Hi all
-=-we are doing alot of movie watch to connect, but the guilt of TV
during the day is something fierce..not to mention the "schoolwork' -=-
What schoolwork?
I wanted to say and "NO schoolwork" during the day because we r making the
shift to unschooling, so it came out wrong, (it's difficult to communicate
through writing) And we are watching movies to laugh and cry and discuss and
have something in common. Ive always thought watching tv with family is not
spending time with them, but i see that we can ,when it leads to thinking
and sharing..
i hope that cleared it up.
Susan
-=-we are doing alot of movie watch to connect, but the guilt of TV
during the day is something fierce..not to mention the "schoolwork' -=-
What schoolwork?
I wanted to say and "NO schoolwork" during the day because we r making the
shift to unschooling, so it came out wrong, (it's difficult to communicate
through writing) And we are watching movies to laugh and cry and discuss and
have something in common. Ive always thought watching tv with family is not
spending time with them, but i see that we can ,when it leads to thinking
and sharing..
i hope that cleared it up.
Susan
On Fri, Jul 23, 2010 at 2:34 PM, Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...> wrote:
>
>
>
> That question is from South Africa. I got one by e-mail this morning
> from Dola in Delhi, India, in which she said, " I went into limitless
> TV for my kids about a year back. after much stress about TV issues."
>
> The stress in both those situations comes from arbitrary rules and
> school-based anti-TV propaganda. Also, in Dola's case there are two
> problems. She's having bouts of complaining and limiting the TV. So
> #1, it's not "limitless," but #2, by calling it limitless in her own
> head (even while she's limiting it), it seems overwhelming.
> "Limitless TV" sounds like a never-ending river of who knows what
> all. And in Susan's case, she has divided TV watching into guilty
> (daytime) and... something different other times. And it wasn't even
> TV! it was "a lot of movie watching to connect."
>
> In both cases (both of which I've read before 6:30 a.m., because of
> them being on far-distant time zones) my first impression is that the
> mom is looking at the TV instead of at the child.
>
> The links to go with these are The Economics of Restricting TV Watching
> http://sandradodd.com/t/economics
> and the general TV page, but maybe especially the discussion where Ren
> Allen argued against TV and then changed her mind. This was when Ren
> was new to unschooling and I love that it's saved.
>
> http://sandradodd.com/t/debate
>
> If the mother is so stressed by TV, it seems she must think it would
> stress her kids even more.
> If the mother stops being stressed by TV, she might find a great store
> of energy and softness that she didn't know she had.
>
> There was a story on another list about a mom relaxing into the dad
> watching soccer. If the writer of that would be willing to share it
> here, I think it would be very helpful!
>
> Sandra
>
>
>
--
Susan Steynberg
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Jenny Cyphers
***Ive always thought watching tv with family is not
spending time with them, but i see that we can ,when it leads to thinking
and sharing..***
Where did that idea come from? Is TV family time only when it leads to thinking
and sharing? It would be hard for it not to lead to those things, but can TV
watching, and movie watching, be just that? Can you watch TV or movies and sit
back and just watch and then move onto something else when done, or does it need
to be leading to something? It's a trick question in a way because I'm not sure
a person could do anything without thinking and sharing, but if the goal is
thinking and sharing, that's different than if the goal is to do something
enjoyable together in which thinking and sharing will likely happen.
What DOES family time look like in your family? You've mention 2 different
things about family time, one is that weekends are family time and that family
time isn't generally watching TV. So, what DO you do? I completely understand
the desire to spend time together as a family. Some families do that in really
simple ways and some families insist on formal time spent together. If it's the
latter, how do the kids feel about it and how would they do it different if they
could?
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
spending time with them, but i see that we can ,when it leads to thinking
and sharing..***
Where did that idea come from? Is TV family time only when it leads to thinking
and sharing? It would be hard for it not to lead to those things, but can TV
watching, and movie watching, be just that? Can you watch TV or movies and sit
back and just watch and then move onto something else when done, or does it need
to be leading to something? It's a trick question in a way because I'm not sure
a person could do anything without thinking and sharing, but if the goal is
thinking and sharing, that's different than if the goal is to do something
enjoyable together in which thinking and sharing will likely happen.
What DOES family time look like in your family? You've mention 2 different
things about family time, one is that weekends are family time and that family
time isn't generally watching TV. So, what DO you do? I completely understand
the desire to spend time together as a family. Some families do that in really
simple ways and some families insist on formal time spent together. If it's the
latter, how do the kids feel about it and how would they do it different if they
could?
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Jane McLauchlan
********There was a story on another list about a mom relaxing into the dad watching soccer. If the writer of that would be willing to share it here, I think it would be very helpful!********
On the unschoolingpartnerships list we were talking about avoidable regrets. Mine relates to my husband's passion for football (soccer).
Once upon a time I greeted the Football World Cup with dread, scorn, and deep, dark wells of resentment. I hated the way Craig had to watch every single game. Every game! I hated that he lost sleep, that he had to take naps during the afternoon, that our lounge turned into his fanboy-den week after week. I even hated the sound of the cheering coming from the TV.
His attention was elsewhere, and I didn't like it one little bit.
We have been together for 23 years. With a World Cup every four years, and each competition lasting just over a month, that's at least 6 months of my life spent stomping around full of bile and self-pity and jealousy. Half a year of my life.
And here is one unforeseen, and really, REALLY wonderful benefit of our past year and a half of unschooling the World Cup came along again, and I realized that I wanted to share in this passion. Not bustle my way in, not to take over and direct, but to support and enjoy Craig's love of the game.
Craig went to bed early each night so that he could get up to watch games in the middle of the night. I made sure the sofa bed in the lounge was all made up for him each evening, and that the TV remote controls were right there, ready to go. I cheerfully tidied up the lounge in the morning. I made sure that he had time in the weekends to catch up on sleep. I bought him magazines about the Cup, and brought home library books about football. We thoroughly enjoyed watching two documentaries about football (and look at those connections from football to politics to music to 1970s sexism to golly everything!)
Instead of seeing the World Cup as something that would take Craig away from me, I saw it for what it was a fabulous opportunity to get closer to my man. I'm still not one to sit down and watch a whole game of football, but I am a real fan of seeing Craig joyful and passionate and having fun.
I actually felt sad when the World Cup wall chart in our kitchen came down at the end of the tournament. It's four loooong years to wait until the next one! (and that is absolutely at the top of my list of Things I Never Thought I'd Say).
Thinking about it some more, being controlling is such a closed-off, rigid and often colourless place to be. My original World Cup-free zone had placed me on a dreary little island, all by myself, righteous to the hilt.
Opening myself up to something new and different ended up being not just good for Craig and I as a couple, but rewarding for me, too. The world is bigger now, more zingy, with more connections, as well as noisier with those vuvuzelas ringing in my ears ; ) The kids got into it too, from following our New Zealand All Whites team (the only unbeaten team in the tournament!), to enjoying having snuggles on the sofabed. Many times Harry and Charlotte said how happy they were to see their Dad excited about the World Cup.
To use Sandra's cocktail party idea, I'd rather be on the side of the room talking football and all the drama, stories and colour that goes with it. The other side of the room is where the wives are talking about how they can't wait for it to end and how stupid it all is. And by definition, how stupid their husbands are for being interested in it. It feels great to be now walking towards the light instead of flicking off the switch.
Jane
Mum to Harry (11) and Charlotte (9)
On the unschoolingpartnerships list we were talking about avoidable regrets. Mine relates to my husband's passion for football (soccer).
Once upon a time I greeted the Football World Cup with dread, scorn, and deep, dark wells of resentment. I hated the way Craig had to watch every single game. Every game! I hated that he lost sleep, that he had to take naps during the afternoon, that our lounge turned into his fanboy-den week after week. I even hated the sound of the cheering coming from the TV.
His attention was elsewhere, and I didn't like it one little bit.
We have been together for 23 years. With a World Cup every four years, and each competition lasting just over a month, that's at least 6 months of my life spent stomping around full of bile and self-pity and jealousy. Half a year of my life.
And here is one unforeseen, and really, REALLY wonderful benefit of our past year and a half of unschooling the World Cup came along again, and I realized that I wanted to share in this passion. Not bustle my way in, not to take over and direct, but to support and enjoy Craig's love of the game.
Craig went to bed early each night so that he could get up to watch games in the middle of the night. I made sure the sofa bed in the lounge was all made up for him each evening, and that the TV remote controls were right there, ready to go. I cheerfully tidied up the lounge in the morning. I made sure that he had time in the weekends to catch up on sleep. I bought him magazines about the Cup, and brought home library books about football. We thoroughly enjoyed watching two documentaries about football (and look at those connections from football to politics to music to 1970s sexism to golly everything!)
Instead of seeing the World Cup as something that would take Craig away from me, I saw it for what it was a fabulous opportunity to get closer to my man. I'm still not one to sit down and watch a whole game of football, but I am a real fan of seeing Craig joyful and passionate and having fun.
I actually felt sad when the World Cup wall chart in our kitchen came down at the end of the tournament. It's four loooong years to wait until the next one! (and that is absolutely at the top of my list of Things I Never Thought I'd Say).
Thinking about it some more, being controlling is such a closed-off, rigid and often colourless place to be. My original World Cup-free zone had placed me on a dreary little island, all by myself, righteous to the hilt.
Opening myself up to something new and different ended up being not just good for Craig and I as a couple, but rewarding for me, too. The world is bigger now, more zingy, with more connections, as well as noisier with those vuvuzelas ringing in my ears ; ) The kids got into it too, from following our New Zealand All Whites team (the only unbeaten team in the tournament!), to enjoying having snuggles on the sofabed. Many times Harry and Charlotte said how happy they were to see their Dad excited about the World Cup.
To use Sandra's cocktail party idea, I'd rather be on the side of the room talking football and all the drama, stories and colour that goes with it. The other side of the room is where the wives are talking about how they can't wait for it to end and how stupid it all is. And by definition, how stupid their husbands are for being interested in it. It feels great to be now walking towards the light instead of flicking off the switch.
Jane
Mum to Harry (11) and Charlotte (9)
Pam Sorooshian
On 7/23/2010 12:40 PM, Jane McLauchlan wrote:
the world cup was here in the USA. My husband did just as yours - plus
watched every show about the world cup he could - all the commentary and
reviews and replays and everything. Some days that meant maybe 12 to 15
hours of world cup soccer related tv happening. My daughters are into
it, too. Rosie also watched every game and Roxana missed the early
morning/middle of the night games, mostly, but she made up for it by
constantly being online reading and researching and learning everything
about all the players and teams and the location and so on.
We bought jerseys - Spain and Netherlands for Cyrus. We got him books
and magazines and a big wall chart. He put together a big world cup pool
- not for money but just for bragging rights and we all joined it and
got lots of friends and family to join.
We arranged our lives around world cup for the entire month. Cyrus
really appreciates it and really deserves to get to enjoy it to the max.
We all had fun with it and it is such an international thing - it does
something to my perception of the world to feel part of it.
Also - Sal and Hugh Masekela did a documentary as they traveled around
in S. Africa visiting places Hugh had lived and some of his family (Hugh
Masekela, jazz musician from S. Africa and his son, sports commentator)
that was really sweet and awesome and ESPN aired it in pieces throughout
the month. It is called, in English, "Through My Father's Eyes," and all
of the segments are available on ESPN's website at:
http://search.espn.go.com/umlando/video/6
We also kept up with all the ball controversy and read about how it was
developed and about the kinds of tests that NASA and CalTech did on it,
etc. And we got a chance to handle one of the actual balls (selling for
almost $200, so we didn't buy it).
This year was super special because a friend of ours was actually
playing on the US team - Johnny Bornstein.
So - Jane - does Craig follow English Premier League Football? Because
another thing we've done is form fantasy league teams - everybody in our
family does it - and he pays attention to how our teams are doing each
week. If you haven't already done it - you might surprise him by going
to their website and picking a team for yourself, starting a family
league, and inviting him to join.
-pam sorooshian
>Me TOO!!! I had the same epiphany about 4 world cups ago - in '94 when
> To use Sandra's cocktail party idea, I'd rather be on the side of the
> room talking football and all the drama, stories and colour that goes
> with it. The other side of the room is where the wives are talking
> about how they can't wait for it to end and how stupid it all is. And
> by definition, how stupid their husbands are for being interested in
> it. It feels great to be now walking towards the light instead of
> flicking off the switch.
the world cup was here in the USA. My husband did just as yours - plus
watched every show about the world cup he could - all the commentary and
reviews and replays and everything. Some days that meant maybe 12 to 15
hours of world cup soccer related tv happening. My daughters are into
it, too. Rosie also watched every game and Roxana missed the early
morning/middle of the night games, mostly, but she made up for it by
constantly being online reading and researching and learning everything
about all the players and teams and the location and so on.
We bought jerseys - Spain and Netherlands for Cyrus. We got him books
and magazines and a big wall chart. He put together a big world cup pool
- not for money but just for bragging rights and we all joined it and
got lots of friends and family to join.
We arranged our lives around world cup for the entire month. Cyrus
really appreciates it and really deserves to get to enjoy it to the max.
We all had fun with it and it is such an international thing - it does
something to my perception of the world to feel part of it.
Also - Sal and Hugh Masekela did a documentary as they traveled around
in S. Africa visiting places Hugh had lived and some of his family (Hugh
Masekela, jazz musician from S. Africa and his son, sports commentator)
that was really sweet and awesome and ESPN aired it in pieces throughout
the month. It is called, in English, "Through My Father's Eyes," and all
of the segments are available on ESPN's website at:
http://search.espn.go.com/umlando/video/6
We also kept up with all the ball controversy and read about how it was
developed and about the kinds of tests that NASA and CalTech did on it,
etc. And we got a chance to handle one of the actual balls (selling for
almost $200, so we didn't buy it).
This year was super special because a friend of ours was actually
playing on the US team - Johnny Bornstein.
So - Jane - does Craig follow English Premier League Football? Because
another thing we've done is form fantasy league teams - everybody in our
family does it - and he pays attention to how our teams are doing each
week. If you haven't already done it - you might surprise him by going
to their website and picking a team for yourself, starting a family
league, and inviting him to join.
-pam sorooshian
Jane McLauchlan
*****Because another thing we've done is form fantasy league teams - everybody in our family does it - and he pays attention to how our teams are doing each week. If you haven't already done it - you might surprise him by going to their website and picking a team for yourself, starting a family league, and inviting him to join.***************
This is what I love soooo much about unschooling it makes the world bigger and brighter by connecting us with things, ideas and each other. Instead disdain there is openness, and instead of diminishment there is enrichment.
I recently saw how far I've come when a friend of my daughter told her mum that she wanted join Charlotte in her ballroom/latin dancing classes. Her mum said "hmmm, okay then", but rolled her eyes at her, clearly letting her daughter know that "Oh crikey, not something else you want to try? Is this really necessary?" I thought how strange it was that she couldn't get excited for her daughter. Just think the frocks, the make-up, that fabulous movie "Simply Ballroom", the music! It was just one small, slightly negative interaction, but boy, what an opportunity missed. The mum can recover the opportunity if she wants, but her daughter's excitement has been diminished, and there's probably been an erosion of trust, the door closing ever so slightly.
For me there's a lovely physical aspect to unschooling Pam your football-related ideas have given me an exciting little blip in my tummy. I get that fizzy excited feeling whenever I discover a documentary or a place or an idea I think the kids or Craig will be interested in : )
Jane
Mum to Harry (11) and Charlotte (9)
This is what I love soooo much about unschooling it makes the world bigger and brighter by connecting us with things, ideas and each other. Instead disdain there is openness, and instead of diminishment there is enrichment.
I recently saw how far I've come when a friend of my daughter told her mum that she wanted join Charlotte in her ballroom/latin dancing classes. Her mum said "hmmm, okay then", but rolled her eyes at her, clearly letting her daughter know that "Oh crikey, not something else you want to try? Is this really necessary?" I thought how strange it was that she couldn't get excited for her daughter. Just think the frocks, the make-up, that fabulous movie "Simply Ballroom", the music! It was just one small, slightly negative interaction, but boy, what an opportunity missed. The mum can recover the opportunity if she wants, but her daughter's excitement has been diminished, and there's probably been an erosion of trust, the door closing ever so slightly.
For me there's a lovely physical aspect to unschooling Pam your football-related ideas have given me an exciting little blip in my tummy. I get that fizzy excited feeling whenever I discover a documentary or a place or an idea I think the kids or Craig will be interested in : )
Jane
Mum to Harry (11) and Charlotte (9)
Susan Steynberg
When we are making a shift in our parenting we are using the tool TV to
reconnect with our teen girls who we have controled and resrespected mostly.
TV is the safe option we all enjoy it. At this point playing a board game
would be horrible. My husband calles it family time during the weekends
because then he is at home mostly as he works late hours.
At this point we are trying to make HUGE changes in our approach to our
girls 12 and 14. my biggest hurdle is what is valuble??? we have been
homeschooling unit studies syle and have moved into unschooling about 1yr
now. so we are getting to know who we are and what we are instead of what we
thought we had to do and be.......
i watch my kids play wii and ask questions about it, i jump trampolin with
them, we listen to radio and sing to the songs, we cook together, but they
dont trust me, they scared to give their opinion, they are afraid to be them
selves, and so they dont know who they are and dont trust themselves. and
that is what im trying to get to, how to get them to believe in themselves
and hear that inner voice instead of me telling them how thay should feel
and how they should behave and how they should speak....
im trying to set myself free, then i know they will become free, but if my
husband isnt free will they become free???????
On Sat, Jul 24, 2010 at 12:53 AM, Pam Sorooshian
<pamsoroosh@...>wrote:
Susan Steynberg
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
reconnect with our teen girls who we have controled and resrespected mostly.
TV is the safe option we all enjoy it. At this point playing a board game
would be horrible. My husband calles it family time during the weekends
because then he is at home mostly as he works late hours.
At this point we are trying to make HUGE changes in our approach to our
girls 12 and 14. my biggest hurdle is what is valuble??? we have been
homeschooling unit studies syle and have moved into unschooling about 1yr
now. so we are getting to know who we are and what we are instead of what we
thought we had to do and be.......
i watch my kids play wii and ask questions about it, i jump trampolin with
them, we listen to radio and sing to the songs, we cook together, but they
dont trust me, they scared to give their opinion, they are afraid to be them
selves, and so they dont know who they are and dont trust themselves. and
that is what im trying to get to, how to get them to believe in themselves
and hear that inner voice instead of me telling them how thay should feel
and how they should behave and how they should speak....
im trying to set myself free, then i know they will become free, but if my
husband isnt free will they become free???????
On Sat, Jul 24, 2010 at 12:53 AM, Pam Sorooshian
<pamsoroosh@...>wrote:
>--
>
> On 7/23/2010 12:40 PM, Jane McLauchlan wrote:
> >
> > To use Sandra's cocktail party idea, I'd rather be on the side of the
> > room talking football and all the drama, stories and colour that goes
> > with it. The other side of the room is where the wives are talking
> > about how they can't wait for it to end and how stupid it all is. And
> > by definition, how stupid their husbands are for being interested in
> > it. It feels great to be now walking towards the light instead of
> > flicking off the switch.
>
> Me TOO!!! I had the same epiphany about 4 world cups ago - in '94 when
> the world cup was here in the USA. My husband did just as yours - plus
> watched every show about the world cup he could - all the commentary and
> reviews and replays and everything. Some days that meant maybe 12 to 15
> hours of world cup soccer related tv happening. My daughters are into
> it, too. Rosie also watched every game and Roxana missed the early
> morning/middle of the night games, mostly, but she made up for it by
> constantly being online reading and researching and learning everything
> about all the players and teams and the location and so on.
>
> We bought jerseys - Spain and Netherlands for Cyrus. We got him books
> and magazines and a big wall chart. He put together a big world cup pool
> - not for money but just for bragging rights and we all joined it and
> got lots of friends and family to join.
>
> We arranged our lives around world cup for the entire month. Cyrus
> really appreciates it and really deserves to get to enjoy it to the max.
> We all had fun with it and it is such an international thing - it does
> something to my perception of the world to feel part of it.
>
> Also - Sal and Hugh Masekela did a documentary as they traveled around
> in S. Africa visiting places Hugh had lived and some of his family (Hugh
> Masekela, jazz musician from S. Africa and his son, sports commentator)
> that was really sweet and awesome and ESPN aired it in pieces throughout
> the month. It is called, in English, "Through My Father's Eyes," and all
> of the segments are available on ESPN's website at:
> http://search.espn.go.com/umlando/video/6
>
> We also kept up with all the ball controversy and read about how it was
> developed and about the kinds of tests that NASA and CalTech did on it,
> etc. And we got a chance to handle one of the actual balls (selling for
> almost $200, so we didn't buy it).
>
> This year was super special because a friend of ours was actually
> playing on the US team - Johnny Bornstein.
>
> So - Jane - does Craig follow English Premier League Football? Because
> another thing we've done is form fantasy league teams - everybody in our
> family does it - and he pays attention to how our teams are doing each
> week. If you haven't already done it - you might surprise him by going
> to their website and picking a team for yourself, starting a family
> league, and inviting him to join.
>
> -pam sorooshian
>
>
>
Susan Steynberg
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-I recently saw how far I've come when a friend of my daughter told
her mum that she wanted join Charlotte in her ballroom/latin dancing
classes. Her mum said "hmmm, okay then", but rolled her eyes at her,
clearly letting her daughter know that "Oh crikey, not something else
you want to try? Is this really necessary?" I thought how strange it
was that she couldn't get excited for her daughter. Just think � the
frocks, the make-up, that fabulous movie "Simply Ballroom", the music!
It was just one small, slightly negative interaction, but boy, what an
opportunity missed. The mum can recover the opportunity if she wants,
but her daughter's excitement has been diminished, and there's
probably been an erosion of trust, the door closing ever so slightly.-=-
SNAGGED! here:
http://sandradodd.com/gettingit
I'm (too) slowly editing a chat from a week ago on 'getting it,' and I
know there were some things on the list lately (last week) about that.
I hope I'll be able to find them.
It's very difficult to lure people over with a list or website to want
to know more about unschooling and then say "Oh, yeah--you have to
change your whole life." Because some people can't, or don't want
to. But I think of that perspective shift as being down in a hole, in
a steep valley. You have a 360-degree view. You can see ALL the way
to the sky, to the tops of the farthest mountains maybe, but once you
start climbing up higher you see a LOT more, and looking back, the
valley looks small and the hole looks dinky.
Sandra
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her mum that she wanted join Charlotte in her ballroom/latin dancing
classes. Her mum said "hmmm, okay then", but rolled her eyes at her,
clearly letting her daughter know that "Oh crikey, not something else
you want to try? Is this really necessary?" I thought how strange it
was that she couldn't get excited for her daughter. Just think � the
frocks, the make-up, that fabulous movie "Simply Ballroom", the music!
It was just one small, slightly negative interaction, but boy, what an
opportunity missed. The mum can recover the opportunity if she wants,
but her daughter's excitement has been diminished, and there's
probably been an erosion of trust, the door closing ever so slightly.-=-
SNAGGED! here:
http://sandradodd.com/gettingit
I'm (too) slowly editing a chat from a week ago on 'getting it,' and I
know there were some things on the list lately (last week) about that.
I hope I'll be able to find them.
It's very difficult to lure people over with a list or website to want
to know more about unschooling and then say "Oh, yeah--you have to
change your whole life." Because some people can't, or don't want
to. But I think of that perspective shift as being down in a hole, in
a steep valley. You have a 360-degree view. You can see ALL the way
to the sky, to the tops of the farthest mountains maybe, but once you
start climbing up higher you see a LOT more, and looking back, the
valley looks small and the hole looks dinky.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]