m_aduhene
hello,
i am back on the list. nice to be back. my children are still sleeping and it's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?
blessings
michelle
i am back on the list. nice to be back. my children are still sleeping and it's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?
blessings
michelle
Sandra Dodd
-=-It's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have
had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with
it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged
becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?-=-
Sure!
I love "11:11"--it's my favorite time (on a digital clock).
IF someone walked in on you right now, that would be quite an invasion
of your privacy and people are sleeping!
If you're imagining that you would feel judged, that's a whole wad of
negative thinking. Do something good with your time! Look at them
and how comfortable they are. Read about the benefits of sleep, at
least.
If someone said something about them sleeping, you could say it's a
holiday from school that day.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with
it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged
becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?-=-
Sure!
I love "11:11"--it's my favorite time (on a digital clock).
IF someone walked in on you right now, that would be quite an invasion
of your privacy and people are sleeping!
If you're imagining that you would feel judged, that's a whole wad of
negative thinking. Do something good with your time! Look at them
and how comfortable they are. Read about the benefits of sleep, at
least.
If someone said something about them sleeping, you could say it's a
holiday from school that day.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Laura McDowell
I'm learning more and more how I've judged the holy-crap out of everything I
do and everything my kids do and so on. So it's wonderful once again to
come on here and hear Sandra point out the whole "WAD" of negative thinking
that is. The amazing thing about learning w/o limits is that we can do away
w/ so much of that. Not easy by any means to do so but yes-definitely take
the time to think, contemplate, read up, do something especially opening to
counter that slew of judgment and negative head bashing while they sleep:-)
Mine are asleep right now because that;s the schedule we have - they are up
late reading, hearing books, watching good movies, playing..
I completely realize how long it's taken me to get over the mindset we have
that sleeping late is slacking-to see when it's not working for your life is
one thing but to feel automatic guilt and envision people coming over and
with alarm and shock perhaps call social services on you is another. >>
this is funny, happened yesterday: I was in the shower at about 11 am and
kids were up , getting things done.. Door bell rings- *never happens*.. I
witness a certain amount of thoughts and behaviors for myself at this point
and I realize my kids will probably answer the door and one of the things
I'm thinking( *BUT aware of it's fear-base*) Is" What is it's Children and
Youth??- do my kids know enough not to let them in?" (I've had these
conversations w/ them) After a few calls from the bathroom from me "who is
it?", I finally let it go. My Daughter tells me then it was the neighbors
grown daughter coming to ask me about homeschooling. Then, I am happily
envisioning how she may have gotten a small peak of what homeschooling could
look like : Fresh bread smells wafting from the kitchen, evidence of such,
mom getting shower at 11- kids politely answering door.. so that's the other
side of what our heads can do with judgment, lol
_____
From: [email protected] [mailto:[email protected]]
On Behalf Of Sandra Dodd
Sent: Thursday, June 10, 2010 9:13 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Sleeping late (was (unknown)
-=-It's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have
had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with
it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged
becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?-=-
Sure!
I love "11:11"--it's my favorite time (on a digital clock).
IF someone walked in on you right now, that would be quite an invasion
of your privacy and people are sleeping!
If you're imagining that you would feel judged, that's a whole wad of
negative thinking. Do something good with your time! Look at them
and how comfortable they are. Read about the benefits of sleep, at
least.
If someone said something about them sleeping, you could say it's a
holiday from school that day.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
do and everything my kids do and so on. So it's wonderful once again to
come on here and hear Sandra point out the whole "WAD" of negative thinking
that is. The amazing thing about learning w/o limits is that we can do away
w/ so much of that. Not easy by any means to do so but yes-definitely take
the time to think, contemplate, read up, do something especially opening to
counter that slew of judgment and negative head bashing while they sleep:-)
Mine are asleep right now because that;s the schedule we have - they are up
late reading, hearing books, watching good movies, playing..
I completely realize how long it's taken me to get over the mindset we have
that sleeping late is slacking-to see when it's not working for your life is
one thing but to feel automatic guilt and envision people coming over and
with alarm and shock perhaps call social services on you is another. >>
this is funny, happened yesterday: I was in the shower at about 11 am and
kids were up , getting things done.. Door bell rings- *never happens*.. I
witness a certain amount of thoughts and behaviors for myself at this point
and I realize my kids will probably answer the door and one of the things
I'm thinking( *BUT aware of it's fear-base*) Is" What is it's Children and
Youth??- do my kids know enough not to let them in?" (I've had these
conversations w/ them) After a few calls from the bathroom from me "who is
it?", I finally let it go. My Daughter tells me then it was the neighbors
grown daughter coming to ask me about homeschooling. Then, I am happily
envisioning how she may have gotten a small peak of what homeschooling could
look like : Fresh bread smells wafting from the kitchen, evidence of such,
mom getting shower at 11- kids politely answering door.. so that's the other
side of what our heads can do with judgment, lol
_____
From: [email protected] [mailto:[email protected]]
On Behalf Of Sandra Dodd
Sent: Thursday, June 10, 2010 9:13 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Sleeping late (was (unknown)
-=-It's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have
had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with
it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged
becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?-=-
Sure!
I love "11:11"--it's my favorite time (on a digital clock).
IF someone walked in on you right now, that would be quite an invasion
of your privacy and people are sleeping!
If you're imagining that you would feel judged, that's a whole wad of
negative thinking. Do something good with your time! Look at them
and how comfortable they are. Read about the benefits of sleep, at
least.
If someone said something about them sleeping, you could say it's a
holiday from school that day.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
m_aduhene
<< but to feel automatic guilt and envision people coming over and
with alarm and shock perhaps call social services on you is another. >>
that's the feeling......had that for a long time. like i may get found out for the "easy life" i am leading and the harm i am doing my children.
also the "wad of negative thinking" is big too.
thanx for phrasing it :-)
blessings
michelle
with alarm and shock perhaps call social services on you is another. >>
that's the feeling......had that for a long time. like i may get found out for the "easy life" i am leading and the harm i am doing my children.
also the "wad of negative thinking" is big too.
thanx for phrasing it :-)
blessings
michelle
keetry
-- In [email protected], "m_aduhene" <m_aduhene@...> wrote:
Alysia
>My kids sleep late almost every morning. My 6 year is still in bed right now at 10:36 am. Sleep is good. It helps the mind rest and rejuvenate and reorganize and make sense of everything it learned the day before. It helps the body grow.
> hello,
> i am back on the list. nice to be back. my children are still sleeping and it's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?
> blessings
> michelle
>
Alysia
Josh Moll
My son was an early riser, winter and summer, until he became 13, now (18) he sleeps late every morning, unless he has an appointment. He wanted to sleep early in the evening as well (around 8 he was mostly asleep). My daughter was a late sleeper, more so in summer than in the winter, because she wants to sleep later in the evening and now ( 8) she goes to sleep between 10 and 12 and wakes between 8 and 10.
It helps to let them move in their own rhythm, their mood is much better during the day if the are allowed to wake in their own time.
Josh
http://thuisschool.wordpress.com/
________________________________
From: keetry <keetry@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Fri, June 11, 2010 4:37:11 PM
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Sleeping Late
-- In [email protected], "m_aduhene" <m_aduhene@...> wrote:
Alysia
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
It helps to let them move in their own rhythm, their mood is much better during the day if the are allowed to wake in their own time.
Josh
http://thuisschool.wordpress.com/
________________________________
From: keetry <keetry@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Fri, June 11, 2010 4:37:11 PM
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Sleeping Late
-- In [email protected], "m_aduhene" <m_aduhene@...> wrote:
>My kids sleep late almost every morning. My 6 year is still in bed right now at 10:36 am. Sleep is good. It helps the mind rest and rejuvenate and reorganize and make sense of everything it learned the day before. It helps the body grow.
> hello,
> i am back on the list. nice to be back. my children are still sleeping and it's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?
> blessings
> michelle
>
Alysia
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
apprentice_mom
My kids insist on getting up at 5 every morning, and I get judged for that (as if there is anything in the world I could do about it)! You can't win either way, so don't worry about it! :)
Justine:)
Justine:)
> ________________________________
> From: keetry <keetry@...>
> To: [email protected]
> Sent: Fri, June 11, 2010 4:37:11 PM
> Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Sleeping Late
>
>
> -- In [email protected], "m_aduhene" <m_aduhene@> wrote:
> >
> > hello,
> > i am back on the list. nice to be back. my children are still sleeping and it's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have had two weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with it, in that, IF someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged becos they r still in bed. is it ok for them to still be there?
> > blessings
> > michelle
> >
>
> My kids sleep late almost every morning. My 6 year is still in bed right now at 10:36 am. Sleep is good. It helps the mind rest and rejuvenate and reorganize and make sense of everything it learned the day before. It helps the body grow.
>
> Alysia
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Sandra Dodd
-=My kids insist on getting up at 5 every morning, and I get judged
for that-=-
How can "I get judged for that"? be rephrased?
I think people say "people judge me" as though there is a clear
definition of the term.
Sometimes "I feel self-conscious" is stated as "people judge me."
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
for that-=-
How can "I get judged for that"? be rephrased?
I think people say "people judge me" as though there is a clear
definition of the term.
Sometimes "I feel self-conscious" is stated as "people judge me."
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Vidyut Kale
I feel the same when it comes to N's flexible sleep times. Its mostly about
how I should 'make' him sleep earlier (among other things, like making him
in sit/stand to encourage sitting/standing, etc). I feel really defensive
and sometimes wish to act on those suggestions just to experience some
approval. I would like people to think nice things when it comes to my son,
see him as the wonderful child he is, rather than judge him as somehow
'less' because of something he does or doesn't do.
In my saner moments, I know that if it isn't this, it will be that
(something else) and people who want to judge my parenting will find ways to
do it. I have a choice right here. Give up my hard-found authenticity and
begin selling out to bribe approval out of people or stay on my path and
remain open to a dialogue around beliefs and see if I end up learning things
that I can do without compromising values and convey the value I find in the
choices I am making. If nothing, I try to convey that it is not something I
do thoughtlessly, but a choice based on what I believe will be truly
empowering for him. It feels tough sometimes. When it feels like its too
much, I postpone the decision. Usually, I feel better in a while and the
problem doesn't seem as overwhelming.
I recognize this as my issue and discomfort, and let N live in peace,
according to how he is joyous and comfortable.
Vidyut
how I should 'make' him sleep earlier (among other things, like making him
in sit/stand to encourage sitting/standing, etc). I feel really defensive
and sometimes wish to act on those suggestions just to experience some
approval. I would like people to think nice things when it comes to my son,
see him as the wonderful child he is, rather than judge him as somehow
'less' because of something he does or doesn't do.
In my saner moments, I know that if it isn't this, it will be that
(something else) and people who want to judge my parenting will find ways to
do it. I have a choice right here. Give up my hard-found authenticity and
begin selling out to bribe approval out of people or stay on my path and
remain open to a dialogue around beliefs and see if I end up learning things
that I can do without compromising values and convey the value I find in the
choices I am making. If nothing, I try to convey that it is not something I
do thoughtlessly, but a choice based on what I believe will be truly
empowering for him. It feels tough sometimes. When it feels like its too
much, I postpone the decision. Usually, I feel better in a while and the
problem doesn't seem as overwhelming.
I recognize this as my issue and discomfort, and let N live in peace,
according to how he is joyous and comfortable.
Vidyut
On Thu, Jun 10, 2010 at 3:43 PM, m_aduhene <m_aduhene@...> wrote:
>
>
> hello,
> i am back on the list. nice to be back. my children are still sleeping and
> it's 11.11am here in the uk. i am letting them sleep becos we have had two
> weeks of busy busy activities. BUT i feel uncomfortable with it, in that, IF
> someone walked in on us right now i would feel judged becos they r still in
> bed. is it ok for them to still be there?
> blessings
> michelle
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-I would like people to think nice things when it comes to my son,
see him as the wonderful child he is, rather than judge him as somehow
'less' because of something he does or doesn't do.-=-
I've seen more and more unschooled children I don't think reflect well
on their parents or on unschooling.
If there's someone I want to be around, or would prefer to avoid, I'm
not "judging him" so much as I'm making decisions for my own life.
It's possible for a person to choose and choose down into a hole where
others aren't interested in hanging out. Or to make too many choices
toward doing EVERYthing anyone else wants them to do.
There must be a balance, though. People who can't or won't live with
others become outcasts or hermits.
-=-. Give up my hard-found authenticity and begin selling out to bribe
approval out of people or ...
TOO strong. Too extreme.
You've painted one end as "authenticity" (NOT a word I think people
should move toward; it's not about clarity, it's about labelling and
justifying), and the other as "selling out" and bribery.... that
stance does not lead toward calm clarity.
-=-If nothing, I try to convey that it is not something I
do thoughtlessly, but a choice based on what I believe will be truly
empowering for him.-=-
Too much thought in a shrill or twisted direction moves further from
empowerment and more toward living separate from the world around.
Unschooling is about learning in and from the world, not about seeing
the world as the enemy.
Sandra
see him as the wonderful child he is, rather than judge him as somehow
'less' because of something he does or doesn't do.-=-
I've seen more and more unschooled children I don't think reflect well
on their parents or on unschooling.
If there's someone I want to be around, or would prefer to avoid, I'm
not "judging him" so much as I'm making decisions for my own life.
It's possible for a person to choose and choose down into a hole where
others aren't interested in hanging out. Or to make too many choices
toward doing EVERYthing anyone else wants them to do.
There must be a balance, though. People who can't or won't live with
others become outcasts or hermits.
-=-. Give up my hard-found authenticity and begin selling out to bribe
approval out of people or ...
TOO strong. Too extreme.
You've painted one end as "authenticity" (NOT a word I think people
should move toward; it's not about clarity, it's about labelling and
justifying), and the other as "selling out" and bribery.... that
stance does not lead toward calm clarity.
-=-If nothing, I try to convey that it is not something I
do thoughtlessly, but a choice based on what I believe will be truly
empowering for him.-=-
Too much thought in a shrill or twisted direction moves further from
empowerment and more toward living separate from the world around.
Unschooling is about learning in and from the world, not about seeing
the world as the enemy.
Sandra