A toddler and getting dressed
nycartgal2003
Logan, who will be three in December does not like wearing clothing.
He has no interest in potty training yet, and wants a diaper most of the time, but there are times when he wants to be completely naked.
This in itself isn't a problem, but there are times when we are not sure how to handle it.
One is at night, there are nights that it gets cold in our apartment.
Logan wants to sleep in a diaper with no blanket. We co-sleep, so on those cold nights he nurses almost all night. I am thinking he is cold, and wants to be closer to me. I end with very little sleep because he is very active when he nurses. We have explained to him that it might get cold, but he still refuses clothing. I will put a cover on him when he is sleeping, but he usually kicks it off.
The second issue is going outside. He has been resisting going outside for almost a year, and getting him dressed is almost impossible, even though we make games out of it and never rush him out.
Once we are out of the house he has fun, and usually does not want to go home. I recently asked him why he doesn't want to go out, and he said it is because he does not want to put on clothing. After telling my husband that I'm going to stop worrying if people think I am a bad mother, the last few days I have taken him out in a short sleeve t-shirt that he decided he wanted to wear, and a diaper. It's been a mild October, but I don't know what to do when it starts getting cold out.
I spent much of last winter and many beautiful days this summer in the apartment, but I really want to get out more.
We never want to use our strength to force clothing on him, so both my husband and I are at a loss here on how to make this a fun/pleasurable experience for all of us.
Thanks,
Meryl
He has no interest in potty training yet, and wants a diaper most of the time, but there are times when he wants to be completely naked.
This in itself isn't a problem, but there are times when we are not sure how to handle it.
One is at night, there are nights that it gets cold in our apartment.
Logan wants to sleep in a diaper with no blanket. We co-sleep, so on those cold nights he nurses almost all night. I am thinking he is cold, and wants to be closer to me. I end with very little sleep because he is very active when he nurses. We have explained to him that it might get cold, but he still refuses clothing. I will put a cover on him when he is sleeping, but he usually kicks it off.
The second issue is going outside. He has been resisting going outside for almost a year, and getting him dressed is almost impossible, even though we make games out of it and never rush him out.
Once we are out of the house he has fun, and usually does not want to go home. I recently asked him why he doesn't want to go out, and he said it is because he does not want to put on clothing. After telling my husband that I'm going to stop worrying if people think I am a bad mother, the last few days I have taken him out in a short sleeve t-shirt that he decided he wanted to wear, and a diaper. It's been a mild October, but I don't know what to do when it starts getting cold out.
I spent much of last winter and many beautiful days this summer in the apartment, but I really want to get out more.
We never want to use our strength to force clothing on him, so both my husband and I are at a loss here on how to make this a fun/pleasurable experience for all of us.
Thanks,
Meryl
Sandra Dodd
It's nearly Halloween. Maybe you could go to a thrift store and find
some nice homemade flannel soft tiger suit, and maybe he'll want to
wear it every day until he outgrows it. I'm thinking of that because
Marty did that. He had a tiger suit that was like a zip-up-the-front
full-body (not feet) thing, and that was what he wore for nearly a
year, when he was 3, 4.
Sandra
some nice homemade flannel soft tiger suit, and maybe he'll want to
wear it every day until he outgrows it. I'm thinking of that because
Marty did that. He had a tiger suit that was like a zip-up-the-front
full-body (not feet) thing, and that was what he wore for nearly a
year, when he was 3, 4.
Sandra
Jenny Cyphers
***We have explained to him that it might get cold, but he still refuses clothing. I will put a cover on him when he is sleeping, but he usually kicks it off.***
Can you slip some clothing on him after he falls asleep? That's what I'd be inclined to do. Maybe a cozy robe that's easy to put on a sleeping child.
*** I recently asked him why he doesn't want to go out, and he said it is because he does not want to put on clothing. After telling my husband that I'm going to stop worrying if people think I am a bad mother, the last few days I have taken him out in a short sleeve t-shirt that he decided he wanted to wear, and a diaper.***
Can he wrap up in a blanket? What about a cape? Does he like to dress up in costumes? Now is the perfect time of year, assuming you live in an area that celebrates Halloween, to acquire costumes at thrift stores. Maybe he'd be ok getting dressed if it meant dressing like a puppy or a lion.
It also might be worth finding out what it is that he dislikes about his clothing. Margaux has always been very sensitive to any clothing that isn't cotton or at least a cotton blend. When she was a baby she literally wouldn't stay asleep unless she had cotton clothing on. Now at the age of 8, she'll often try to wear something for what it looks like, only to discard it an hour later for something cotton. All tags have to be removed and we use mostly seamless socks, or socks with gentle seems. Underwear must be a certain style or she won't get dressed at all. I've had to wash underwear and dry it, to get out the door when the ones she likes weren't clean. She's equally picky about shoes, prefering larger sizes, and the way a certain garment hangs on her body, where the seams are, and how long or short or tight or loose something is. It can be overwhelming, but it's all easily worked around. If at any given time we have at least one
complete outfit that will work, then we are doin good! Oh, and coats are pretty much a no go, Margaux prefers sweaters and hoodies or both, to a coat.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Can you slip some clothing on him after he falls asleep? That's what I'd be inclined to do. Maybe a cozy robe that's easy to put on a sleeping child.
*** I recently asked him why he doesn't want to go out, and he said it is because he does not want to put on clothing. After telling my husband that I'm going to stop worrying if people think I am a bad mother, the last few days I have taken him out in a short sleeve t-shirt that he decided he wanted to wear, and a diaper.***
Can he wrap up in a blanket? What about a cape? Does he like to dress up in costumes? Now is the perfect time of year, assuming you live in an area that celebrates Halloween, to acquire costumes at thrift stores. Maybe he'd be ok getting dressed if it meant dressing like a puppy or a lion.
It also might be worth finding out what it is that he dislikes about his clothing. Margaux has always been very sensitive to any clothing that isn't cotton or at least a cotton blend. When she was a baby she literally wouldn't stay asleep unless she had cotton clothing on. Now at the age of 8, she'll often try to wear something for what it looks like, only to discard it an hour later for something cotton. All tags have to be removed and we use mostly seamless socks, or socks with gentle seems. Underwear must be a certain style or she won't get dressed at all. I've had to wash underwear and dry it, to get out the door when the ones she likes weren't clean. She's equally picky about shoes, prefering larger sizes, and the way a certain garment hangs on her body, where the seams are, and how long or short or tight or loose something is. It can be overwhelming, but it's all easily worked around. If at any given time we have at least one
complete outfit that will work, then we are doin good! Oh, and coats are pretty much a no go, Margaux prefers sweaters and hoodies or both, to a coat.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-It also might be worth finding out what it is that he dislikes
about his clothing. Margaux has always been very sensitive to any
clothing that isn't cotton or at least a cotton blend. When she was a
baby she literally wouldn't stay asleep unless she had cotton clothing
on. -=-
Kirby was that way too. Luckily, in the mid and late 1980's there was
a cotton-clothing company here called After the Stork, and we could go
to their factory outlet store and get the stuff that had flaws, so he
just about lived in their sweatshirts and pants for years. He could
wear them daytime and night and they had dark colors for boys, even
black. I had friends who worked for them, too. It was a good
company, for a long time. When Holly was a baby, in the 1990's, I'd
still find some of their stuff in thrift stores on occasion.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
about his clothing. Margaux has always been very sensitive to any
clothing that isn't cotton or at least a cotton blend. When she was a
baby she literally wouldn't stay asleep unless she had cotton clothing
on. -=-
Kirby was that way too. Luckily, in the mid and late 1980's there was
a cotton-clothing company here called After the Stork, and we could go
to their factory outlet store and get the stuff that had flaws, so he
just about lived in their sweatshirts and pants for years. He could
wear them daytime and night and they had dark colors for boys, even
black. I had friends who worked for them, too. It was a good
company, for a long time. When Holly was a baby, in the 1990's, I'd
still find some of their stuff in thrift stores on occasion.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Robyn L. Coburn
Some others have given you some good ideas about clothing alternatives.
I want to address this:
=====After telling my husband that I'm going to stop worrying if people
think I am a bad mother, the last few days I have taken him out in a short
sleeve t-shirt that he decided he wanted to wear, and a diaper. It's been a
mild October, but I don't know what to do when it starts getting cold
out.======
What you do is walk nearby conspicuously holding his sweater or hoody in
your hands, and possibly his shoes too. Then when people glance at him then
look up at you with query in their faces, you smile, shrug and hold up the
sweater - a non-verbal "what can you do?" They will most likely smile back.
Plus you have the warm things if he suddenly decides to put them on. (Maybe
he'd like a poncho from very soft fleece?)
I think that there will come a time when participating in fun stuff out of
the house becomes more important than being nude.
I think if it were our apartment, we'd turn up the heat a bit, or get small
room heater just for the bedroom.
Robyn L. Coburn
www.Iggyjingles.etsy.com
www.iggyjingles.blogspot.com
www.allthingsdoll.blogspot.com
I want to address this:
=====After telling my husband that I'm going to stop worrying if people
think I am a bad mother, the last few days I have taken him out in a short
sleeve t-shirt that he decided he wanted to wear, and a diaper. It's been a
mild October, but I don't know what to do when it starts getting cold
out.======
What you do is walk nearby conspicuously holding his sweater or hoody in
your hands, and possibly his shoes too. Then when people glance at him then
look up at you with query in their faces, you smile, shrug and hold up the
sweater - a non-verbal "what can you do?" They will most likely smile back.
Plus you have the warm things if he suddenly decides to put them on. (Maybe
he'd like a poncho from very soft fleece?)
I think that there will come a time when participating in fun stuff out of
the house becomes more important than being nude.
I think if it were our apartment, we'd turn up the heat a bit, or get small
room heater just for the bedroom.
Robyn L. Coburn
www.Iggyjingles.etsy.com
www.iggyjingles.blogspot.com
www.allthingsdoll.blogspot.com
carenkh
My first thought when I read your post was that your son might be very sensitive to how clothing feels. If you've never read "Raising Your Spirited Child", it would be a good read if that's the case.
Transitions also might be hard for him. If I'm remembering correctly, that's also addressed in that book. Evan, my oldest, HATED when seasons changed, and he was either going to switch from pants to shorts, or shorts to pants. I never forced the switch, but he wanted to be comfortable. I remember him being very resistant to that change.
There's also a transition when leaving the house, and since he's happy once he's out, and then doesn't want to leave wherever he is then, that might be the case, difficulty with transitions in general. As Evan got older, I could talk to him about that, remind him that he didn't like to change what he was doing, but once he did, he usually liked what we were going to do. I'd also give him the option to come home if I could; if we got where we were going and he wanted to come home, we'd leave right away.
In a separate vein, I was also reminded of my youngest. When Seth was an infant, I could tell he absolutely did NOT like blanket sleepers - he'd stretch out his little feet, trying to get them free, and he didn't sleep well at all if I put him in one. He was born in February, and we lived in an old, cold house! But I noticed he slept much better in those infant nightgowns, with his feet free.
As he got older, he wouldn't wear coats at all. He was about 2 1/2, when he was able to tell me: "I like being cold!" That was a revelation for me!! I cannot *stand* being cold at all, and the thought that someone would *enjoy* that sensation was surprising to me. I did as was suggested here, I always had warmer clothes with us at the ready, but he always preferred t-shirts, even in very cold weather.
I can't remember how old he was, still fairly young, when we were going to be around family, and it was cold. I said something like, "I'm a little worried that they'll think I'm a bad mommy, if I don't have you dress warmly." He just laughed and laughed, like that was the silliest thing he'd ever heard. It gave me a great perspective. I just told them, "He really likes being cold!"
When he was 2, one friend was telling me that very young children's bodies don't self-regulate as well as adults, that they don't "feel" cold like adults do, and it could be harmful to him to let him play without a coat. I'd never heard that before, and it worried me! I kept checking in with him while he played at her house, and he never wanted a coat, and his lips didn't turn blue or anything. He's ten now, and has survived just fine so far!
My gut feeling for your son is it's more the transition and sensitivity to textures thing, rather than liking cold, though I couldn't tell you why I think that! (Maybe it's still a little surprising to me that someone would like to be cold!)
Caren
Transitions also might be hard for him. If I'm remembering correctly, that's also addressed in that book. Evan, my oldest, HATED when seasons changed, and he was either going to switch from pants to shorts, or shorts to pants. I never forced the switch, but he wanted to be comfortable. I remember him being very resistant to that change.
There's also a transition when leaving the house, and since he's happy once he's out, and then doesn't want to leave wherever he is then, that might be the case, difficulty with transitions in general. As Evan got older, I could talk to him about that, remind him that he didn't like to change what he was doing, but once he did, he usually liked what we were going to do. I'd also give him the option to come home if I could; if we got where we were going and he wanted to come home, we'd leave right away.
In a separate vein, I was also reminded of my youngest. When Seth was an infant, I could tell he absolutely did NOT like blanket sleepers - he'd stretch out his little feet, trying to get them free, and he didn't sleep well at all if I put him in one. He was born in February, and we lived in an old, cold house! But I noticed he slept much better in those infant nightgowns, with his feet free.
As he got older, he wouldn't wear coats at all. He was about 2 1/2, when he was able to tell me: "I like being cold!" That was a revelation for me!! I cannot *stand* being cold at all, and the thought that someone would *enjoy* that sensation was surprising to me. I did as was suggested here, I always had warmer clothes with us at the ready, but he always preferred t-shirts, even in very cold weather.
I can't remember how old he was, still fairly young, when we were going to be around family, and it was cold. I said something like, "I'm a little worried that they'll think I'm a bad mommy, if I don't have you dress warmly." He just laughed and laughed, like that was the silliest thing he'd ever heard. It gave me a great perspective. I just told them, "He really likes being cold!"
When he was 2, one friend was telling me that very young children's bodies don't self-regulate as well as adults, that they don't "feel" cold like adults do, and it could be harmful to him to let him play without a coat. I'd never heard that before, and it worried me! I kept checking in with him while he played at her house, and he never wanted a coat, and his lips didn't turn blue or anything. He's ten now, and has survived just fine so far!
My gut feeling for your son is it's more the transition and sensitivity to textures thing, rather than liking cold, though I couldn't tell you why I think that! (Maybe it's still a little surprising to me that someone would like to be cold!)
Caren
John and Amanda Slater
Is there a character he likes? How about a shirt several sizes too large? It would hang down and cover a diaper. If he was willing, you could easily add pants.
Amanda
Eli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Amanda
Eli 8, Samuel 6
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
carnationsgalore
> It also might be worth finding out what it is that he dislikesMy 13 yr. old son has had certain preferences of clothing since he was about 4 yrs. old. Once we found something he would wear, I'd buy several of that item. He will only wear short-sleeve t-shirts and when it's cold outside he just wears his jacket. Although I'll say that he reacts differently than I do to temperature. The outside temperature might be cold to me, but warm to him. He also had a favorite shoe and we were fortunate that he was able to have the same style and color through 4 sizes. As he moved into a men's size, he has started wearing Vans slip-on shoes. He has never liked shoelaces.
> about his clothing.
Oh, and he has never liked to go shopping. I buy things and bring them home for him to try. Once he decides what he likes, I take the other stuff back and buy more of the style he does like. :)
Beth M.
Ed Wendell
If you're crafty you can make one with nice soft yellow sweats - I did that for Zachariah. I bought bright golden yellow sweats - took black felt and iron on fusing - I cut various long and short pieces to make the stripes more realistic looking (so they were not just straight stripes going around) anyway I ironed them on and he wore it a lot. I think he was two.
I've seen the superman pajamas being worn a lot at homeschool events.
If you come up with something that is his favorite buy or make at least two identical outfits so one can always be worn if one needs washing or is in the wash.
Lisa W.
I've seen the superman pajamas being worn a lot at homeschool events.
If you come up with something that is his favorite buy or make at least two identical outfits so one can always be worn if one needs washing or is in the wash.
Lisa W.
----- Original Message -----
From: Sandra Dodd
To: [email protected]
Sent: Tuesday, October 13, 2009 1:15 PM
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] A toddler and getting dressed
It's nearly Halloween. Maybe you could go to a thrift store and find
some nice homemade flannel soft tiger suit, and maybe he'll want to
wear it every day until he outgrows it. I'm thinking of that because
Marty did that. He had a tiger suit that was like a zip-up-the-front
full-body (not feet) thing, and that was what he wore for nearly a
year, when he was 3, 4.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kim meltzer
I love that idea, Sandra. My daughter when she was three also did not like
the puffy, rattly, stuffed-in feeling and she wore a full body ladybug
outfit all winter. Granted we live in MD, and winters are not that bad
here.
For the OP, when your child goes out in a diaper and a thin t-shirt, is
he cold? Does he seem very uncomfortable? If he does, now is the time to
pull out of your pack a long sleeve shirt, pants, sweater, socks and shoes.
When he sees it in that context, often he'll be so glad you brought it. I
do that with my own three year old when he is being very determined at the
house, but then is uncomfortable while outdoors.
My son also has a warm monkey suit with matching jacket that he loves.
Kim
Baltimore
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
the puffy, rattly, stuffed-in feeling and she wore a full body ladybug
outfit all winter. Granted we live in MD, and winters are not that bad
here.
For the OP, when your child goes out in a diaper and a thin t-shirt, is
he cold? Does he seem very uncomfortable? If he does, now is the time to
pull out of your pack a long sleeve shirt, pants, sweater, socks and shoes.
When he sees it in that context, often he'll be so glad you brought it. I
do that with my own three year old when he is being very determined at the
house, but then is uncomfortable while outdoors.
My son also has a warm monkey suit with matching jacket that he loves.
Kim
Baltimore
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Meryl Ranzer
Thank you so much for all of the wonderful ideas.
**It's nearly Halloween. Maybe you could go to a thrift store and find
some nice homemade flannel soft tiger suit, and maybe he'll want to
wear it every day until he outgrows it. I'm thinking of that because
Marty did that. He had a tiger suit that was like a zip-up-the-front
full-body (not feet) thing, and that was what he wore for nearly a
year, when he was 3, 4.**
It's funny that a few of you mentioned trying a Halloween costume.
I wasn't even going to try to dress him because I thought he would
resist, but maybe he'll find it fun, so I will try.
He loves Thomas The Tank engine, maybe I can find some kind of train
costume.
**My gut feeling for your son is it's more the transition and
sensitivity to textures thing, rather than liking cold, though I
couldn't tell you why I think that! (Maybe it's still a little
surprising to me that someone would like to be cold!)**
Caren, I think you are right about the "transition", but I don't think
it is a fabric sensitivity.
All his clothing is cotton, and he doesn't pull at it or seem bothered
once he is dressed.
It's more the act of putting on the clothing that seems to upset him.
**What you do is walk nearby conspicuously holding his sweater or
hoody in
your hands, and possibly his shoes too. Then when people glance at him
then
look up at you with query in their faces, you smile, shrug and hold up
the
sweater - a non-verbal "what can you do?" They will most likely smile
back.**
LOL, I have done this.
I always bring a full outfit for him to wear, and I check in with him
to see if he is cold.
I think Logan is like your son Caren, he doesn't feel the cold, and I
am like you...always freezing.
My husband and I are hoping that he will at least want to wear pants,
shirt, and shoes when real winter hits...I
ll keep you posted.
Meryl
Meryl Ranzer
mranzer@...
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
**It's nearly Halloween. Maybe you could go to a thrift store and find
some nice homemade flannel soft tiger suit, and maybe he'll want to
wear it every day until he outgrows it. I'm thinking of that because
Marty did that. He had a tiger suit that was like a zip-up-the-front
full-body (not feet) thing, and that was what he wore for nearly a
year, when he was 3, 4.**
It's funny that a few of you mentioned trying a Halloween costume.
I wasn't even going to try to dress him because I thought he would
resist, but maybe he'll find it fun, so I will try.
He loves Thomas The Tank engine, maybe I can find some kind of train
costume.
**My gut feeling for your son is it's more the transition and
sensitivity to textures thing, rather than liking cold, though I
couldn't tell you why I think that! (Maybe it's still a little
surprising to me that someone would like to be cold!)**
Caren, I think you are right about the "transition", but I don't think
it is a fabric sensitivity.
All his clothing is cotton, and he doesn't pull at it or seem bothered
once he is dressed.
It's more the act of putting on the clothing that seems to upset him.
**What you do is walk nearby conspicuously holding his sweater or
hoody in
your hands, and possibly his shoes too. Then when people glance at him
then
look up at you with query in their faces, you smile, shrug and hold up
the
sweater - a non-verbal "what can you do?" They will most likely smile
back.**
LOL, I have done this.
I always bring a full outfit for him to wear, and I check in with him
to see if he is cold.
I think Logan is like your son Caren, he doesn't feel the cold, and I
am like you...always freezing.
My husband and I are hoping that he will at least want to wear pants,
shirt, and shoes when real winter hits...I
ll keep you posted.
Meryl
Meryl Ranzer
mranzer@...
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
BRIAN POLIKOWSKY
My son did not like clothes either.
I bought him lots of Thomas the Tank Engine shirts, pants and shoes.
They have it all!
I picked soft pieces, cut the tags out and made sure they were confortable and cotton.
I left the house with him in diapers and took the clothles with me. When we got to places he was able to get dressed wit no problem.
He wore cottom pjs sometimes to the park or the same shirt and pants for a week.
Alex Polikowsky
http://polykow.blogspot.com/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingmn/
________________________________
From: Meryl Ranzer <mranzer@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Wed, October 14, 2009 10:37:00 AM
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Re: A toddler and getting dressed
Thank you so much for all of the wonderful ideas.
**It's nearly Halloween. Maybe you could go to a thrift store and find
some nice homemade flannel soft tiger suit, and maybe he'll want to
wear it every day until he outgrows it. I'm thinking of that because
Marty did that. He had a tiger suit that was like a zip-up-the-front
full-body (not feet) thing, and that was what he wore for nearly a
year, when he was 3, 4.**
It's funny that a few of you mentioned trying a Halloween costume.
I wasn't even going to try to dress him because I thought he would
resist, but maybe he'll find it fun, so I will try.
He loves Thomas The Tank engine, maybe I can find some kind of train
costume.
**My gut feeling for your son is it's more the transition and
sensitivity to textures thing, rather than liking cold, though I
couldn't tell you why I think that! (Maybe it's still a little
surprising to me that someone would like to be cold!)**
Caren, I think you are right about the "transition" , but I don't think
it is a fabric sensitivity.
All his clothing is cotton, and he doesn't pull at it or seem bothered
once he is dressed.
It's more the act of putting on the clothing that seems to upset him.
**What you do is walk nearby conspicuously holding his sweater or
hoody in
your hands, and possibly his shoes too. Then when people glance at him
then
look up at you with query in their faces, you smile, shrug and hold up
the
sweater - a non-verbal "what can you do?" They will most likely smile
back.**
LOL, I have done this.
I always bring a full outfit for him to wear, and I check in with him
to see if he is cold.
I think Logan is like your son Caren, he doesn't feel the cold, and I
am like you...always freezing.
My husband and I are hoping that he will at least want to wear pants,
shirt, and shoes when real winter hits...I
ll keep you posted.
Meryl
Meryl Ranzer
mranzer@nyc. rr.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I bought him lots of Thomas the Tank Engine shirts, pants and shoes.
They have it all!
I picked soft pieces, cut the tags out and made sure they were confortable and cotton.
I left the house with him in diapers and took the clothles with me. When we got to places he was able to get dressed wit no problem.
He wore cottom pjs sometimes to the park or the same shirt and pants for a week.
Alex Polikowsky
http://polykow.blogspot.com/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingmn/
________________________________
From: Meryl Ranzer <mranzer@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Wed, October 14, 2009 10:37:00 AM
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Re: A toddler and getting dressed
Thank you so much for all of the wonderful ideas.
**It's nearly Halloween. Maybe you could go to a thrift store and find
some nice homemade flannel soft tiger suit, and maybe he'll want to
wear it every day until he outgrows it. I'm thinking of that because
Marty did that. He had a tiger suit that was like a zip-up-the-front
full-body (not feet) thing, and that was what he wore for nearly a
year, when he was 3, 4.**
It's funny that a few of you mentioned trying a Halloween costume.
I wasn't even going to try to dress him because I thought he would
resist, but maybe he'll find it fun, so I will try.
He loves Thomas The Tank engine, maybe I can find some kind of train
costume.
**My gut feeling for your son is it's more the transition and
sensitivity to textures thing, rather than liking cold, though I
couldn't tell you why I think that! (Maybe it's still a little
surprising to me that someone would like to be cold!)**
Caren, I think you are right about the "transition" , but I don't think
it is a fabric sensitivity.
All his clothing is cotton, and he doesn't pull at it or seem bothered
once he is dressed.
It's more the act of putting on the clothing that seems to upset him.
**What you do is walk nearby conspicuously holding his sweater or
hoody in
your hands, and possibly his shoes too. Then when people glance at him
then
look up at you with query in their faces, you smile, shrug and hold up
the
sweater - a non-verbal "what can you do?" They will most likely smile
back.**
LOL, I have done this.
I always bring a full outfit for him to wear, and I check in with him
to see if he is cold.
I think Logan is like your son Caren, he doesn't feel the cold, and I
am like you...always freezing.
My husband and I are hoping that he will at least want to wear pants,
shirt, and shoes when real winter hits...I
ll keep you posted.
Meryl
Meryl Ranzer
mranzer@nyc. rr.com
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Sandra Dodd
-=-
All his clothing is cotton, and he doesn't pull at it or seem bothered
once he is dressed.
It's more the act of putting on the clothing that seems to upset him.-=-
I've heard some kids panic at having things pulled over their heads.
Are button-up flannel shirts a possibility? He could wear them open
sometimes.
There are awesome hoodies these days. Maybe a zippered hoodie?
Sandra
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All his clothing is cotton, and he doesn't pull at it or seem bothered
once he is dressed.
It's more the act of putting on the clothing that seems to upset him.-=-
I've heard some kids panic at having things pulled over their heads.
Are button-up flannel shirts a possibility? He could wear them open
sometimes.
There are awesome hoodies these days. Maybe a zippered hoodie?
Sandra
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Krisula Moyer
>>What you do is walk nearby conspicuously holding his sweater orhoody in
your hands, and possibly his shoes too. Then when people glance at him
then
look up at you with query in their faces, you smile, shrug and hold up
the
sweater - a non-verbal "what can you do?" They will most likely smile
back.<<
This is what I was thinking. Sydney used to refuse clothing at that
age until it got chilly out. I would take her outside in her minimal
clothing and bare feet but I'd have warmer, easy to put on clothes on
hand. As soon as she got chilly I'd offer the clothes/shoes. She
couldn't seem to anticipate that she might want clothes or shoes but
when she finally did get cold or uncomfortable she did want them...
usually.
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musicmom98233
These posts could have been written about my son, a very late potty-trainer who preferred being naked or, as he got older, wearing the absolute minimum of soft cotton clothing (tank Ts and shorts) all the time, regardless of temperature. The previous posts had lots of great ideas ('Raising Your Spirited Child' helped us to see things in a different light, by the way)but what seems very timely to mention is that last weekend, out of the blue, he asked if we could go shopping for new clothes.
It was the first time in his 15 years that he had come with me, and we had a wonderful time browsing through the many soft-but-cool-looking things available. He eagerly tried things on (admiring himself in the mirror) and picked out a bunch of new pants and shirts. He even spent his own money on some extras.
Suddenly he cares about what he looks like, and thinks about what he is going to wear if the weather is bad -- but he came to that at his own pace, without pressure from us or the outside world.
It can happen!
It was the first time in his 15 years that he had come with me, and we had a wonderful time browsing through the many soft-but-cool-looking things available. He eagerly tried things on (admiring himself in the mirror) and picked out a bunch of new pants and shirts. He even spent his own money on some extras.
Suddenly he cares about what he looks like, and thinks about what he is going to wear if the weather is bad -- but he came to that at his own pace, without pressure from us or the outside world.
It can happen!
elwazani
--- In [email protected], Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...> wrote:
>My now 11 year old went through a period of time from 2-3 years of age where he would totally panic if you tried to pull a shirt over his head...it just came on way day...He owned 1 buttton up shirt at that time and some jammies...I searched every secon hand store in the area and asked friends with older kids for any left over hand-me -downs...there weren't any button shirts in the retail stores here at that time...and then one day...he puleed a shirt on over his head and that was that...it was a long year though.
> -=-
>
> It's more the act of putting on the clothing that seems to upset him.-=-
>
> I've heard some kids panic at having things pulled over their heads.
> Are button-up flannel shirts a possibility? He could wear them open
> sometimes.
>
> There are awesome hoodies these days. Maybe a zippered hoodie?
>
> Sandra
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Meryl Ranzer
**My now 11 year old went through a period of time from 2-3 years of
age where he would totally panic if you tried to pull a shirt over his
head...it just came on way day...He owned 1 buttton up shirt at that
time and some jammies...I searched every secon hand store in the area
and asked friends with older kids for any left over hand-me -
downs...there weren't any button shirts in the retail stores here at
that time...and then one day...he puleed a shirt on over his head and
that was that...it was a long year though.**
He doesn't like button down shirts, or pants either...sigh
I showed him some Thomas the Tank Engine Shirts on the computer
yesterday, he said he dod not want to wear any cothes.
I'm going to buy one anyway.
Meryl
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
age where he would totally panic if you tried to pull a shirt over his
head...it just came on way day...He owned 1 buttton up shirt at that
time and some jammies...I searched every secon hand store in the area
and asked friends with older kids for any left over hand-me -
downs...there weren't any button shirts in the retail stores here at
that time...and then one day...he puleed a shirt on over his head and
that was that...it was a long year though.**
He doesn't like button down shirts, or pants either...sigh
I showed him some Thomas the Tank Engine Shirts on the computer
yesterday, he said he dod not want to wear any cothes.
I'm going to buy one anyway.
Meryl
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-I showed him some Thomas the Tank Engine Shirts on the computer
yesterday, he said he dod not want to wear any cothes.
I'm going to buy one anyway.-=-
EEEK!
Why don't you just get him a shirt that says "I don't care what you
want"? Do you want to turn him against Thomas the Tank Engine and his
mom all at once?
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
yesterday, he said he dod not want to wear any cothes.
I'm going to buy one anyway.-=-
EEEK!
Why don't you just get him a shirt that says "I don't care what you
want"? Do you want to turn him against Thomas the Tank Engine and his
mom all at once?
Sandra
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yelenakaplan
My friend's daughter spent the winter (northwest so not that cold but still the whole winter) in summer dresses. Whenever we were out we just made sure that her coat was always within easy reach, she never reached for it, not once that I saw. I do the same thing with my kiddo, but she reaches for the coat :)
She has has had a huge issue getting dressed to go out until recently (she just turned 3 and it still happens occasionally). My husband would fight with her sometimes, both of them getting all worked up trying to find the 'right' outfit. It wasn't about the outfit, it was about actually getting dressed.
What always worked for me though is packing a couple of outfits that she likes, getting in the car with her in her original state (usually naked, sometimes in undies) and getting dressed when we get wherever it is we're going. If we went to a restaurant or other fun public place, I'd let her know that they don't like to see naked butts in public places and for some reason, on the spot it wasn't an issue to get dressed. Now, sometimes if we play at a friend's house she'll ask "do they like naked kiddos around here?", mostly in the summer when there is water involved -- luckily many of my friends' kids are huge fans of running around naked so the answer is usually "not at all".
Maybe it would help to find friends with nudist kids? :)
Yelena
She has has had a huge issue getting dressed to go out until recently (she just turned 3 and it still happens occasionally). My husband would fight with her sometimes, both of them getting all worked up trying to find the 'right' outfit. It wasn't about the outfit, it was about actually getting dressed.
What always worked for me though is packing a couple of outfits that she likes, getting in the car with her in her original state (usually naked, sometimes in undies) and getting dressed when we get wherever it is we're going. If we went to a restaurant or other fun public place, I'd let her know that they don't like to see naked butts in public places and for some reason, on the spot it wasn't an issue to get dressed. Now, sometimes if we play at a friend's house she'll ask "do they like naked kiddos around here?", mostly in the summer when there is water involved -- luckily many of my friends' kids are huge fans of running around naked so the answer is usually "not at all".
Maybe it would help to find friends with nudist kids? :)
Yelena
>
Meryl Ranzer
**-=-I showed him some Thomas the Tank Engine Shirts on the computer
yesterday, he said he dod not want to wear any cothes.
I'm going to buy one anyway.-=-
EEEK!
Why don't you just get him a shirt that says "I don't care what you
want"? Do you want to turn him against Thomas the Tank Engine and his
mom all at once?**
Sandra
Thanks-
I hadn't thought of it that way.
It thought once he saw the Thomas shirt he might get excited.
I would never force him to wear it, but it occurs to me now that
buying it when he said no is being manipulative.
Not the mom I want to be.
We went out yesterday, it was cold.
He wore a short sleeve t-shirt, diaper, and socks.
I asked if he would like a blanket, that made him happy.
Meryl
Meryl Ranzer
mranzer@...
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yesterday, he said he dod not want to wear any cothes.
I'm going to buy one anyway.-=-
EEEK!
Why don't you just get him a shirt that says "I don't care what you
want"? Do you want to turn him against Thomas the Tank Engine and his
mom all at once?**
Sandra
Thanks-
I hadn't thought of it that way.
It thought once he saw the Thomas shirt he might get excited.
I would never force him to wear it, but it occurs to me now that
buying it when he said no is being manipulative.
Not the mom I want to be.
We went out yesterday, it was cold.
He wore a short sleeve t-shirt, diaper, and socks.
I asked if he would like a blanket, that made him happy.
Meryl
Meryl Ranzer
mranzer@...
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Bernadette Lynn
2009/10/16 Meryl Ranzer mranzer@...
bed.
I've just spent several days walking round Disneyland Paris with an
inappropriately-dressed three-year-old wrapped in a blanket. She seemed to
enjoy herself as much as the rest of us.
Bernadette.
--
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/U15459
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>Maybe you could find him a Thomas blanket to keep him warm outside and in
> We went out yesterday, it was cold.
> He wore a short sleeve t-shirt, diaper, and socks.
> I asked if he would like a blanket, that made him happy.
>
> Meryl
>
bed.
I've just spent several days walking round Disneyland Paris with an
inappropriately-dressed three-year-old wrapped in a blanket. She seemed to
enjoy herself as much as the rest of us.
Bernadette.
--
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/U15459
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
I was looking for toys for the local Toys for Tots drive (my husband
participates in a couple of events for which that's the entrance fee--
a toy), and came across this.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000VO3HC8/ref=pd_luc_sim_01_03
It's on sale, and it's a wooden magnetic "paperdoll" of a boy, and he
can dress as a pirate, a firefighter, a knight, a construction worker
or a policeman.
Maybe, depending on the kid, this would be helpful in getting him
interested in clothing. If not, it has good reviews. I'm going to
get the princess version for Keith to give away, and some baby toys.
The county-approved Santa-toy-delivery program to which those toys go
probably would disappoint little boys if they got "a paperdoll."
Sandra
participates in a couple of events for which that's the entrance fee--
a toy), and came across this.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000VO3HC8/ref=pd_luc_sim_01_03
It's on sale, and it's a wooden magnetic "paperdoll" of a boy, and he
can dress as a pirate, a firefighter, a knight, a construction worker
or a policeman.
Maybe, depending on the kid, this would be helpful in getting him
interested in clothing. If not, it has good reviews. I'm going to
get the princess version for Keith to give away, and some baby toys.
The county-approved Santa-toy-delivery program to which those toys go
probably would disappoint little boys if they got "a paperdoll."
Sandra
Meryl Ranzer
Thanks for the suggestion Sandra.
I'm going to buy it.
In recent days we have gotten more information about why Logan does
not want to get dressed.
He told us that when he wears his blue shirt and diaper only, he is a
little baby...and that pants are for big boys.
Meryl
I'm going to buy it.
In recent days we have gotten more information about why Logan does
not want to get dressed.
He told us that when he wears his blue shirt and diaper only, he is a
little baby...and that pants are for big boys.
Meryl
lalow66
--- In [email protected], Meryl Ranzer <mranzer@...> wrote:
i have one son who is more particular than the others.
sometime pajamas have worked for us for awhile. those zip up kind mind feel more like baby clothes to him.
shoes have always been our thing around here. i hate them personally so i guess he takes after me but i have been alot nicer than my mom was about it.
>i buy lots of cheap clothes from garage sales (usually 25 to 50 cents each). then the kids can choose and I donate the rest. I am able to get nice stuff with all different varieties that way. sometimes a picture of something to a kid is alot different than a real choice.
> Thanks for the suggestion Sandra.
> I'm going to buy it.
>
> In recent days we have gotten more information about why Logan does
> not want to get dressed.
> He told us that when he wears his blue shirt and diaper only, he is a
> little baby...and that pants are for big boys.
>
>
> Meryl
>
i have one son who is more particular than the others.
sometime pajamas have worked for us for awhile. those zip up kind mind feel more like baby clothes to him.
shoes have always been our thing around here. i hate them personally so i guess he takes after me but i have been alot nicer than my mom was about it.
Sandra Dodd
-=-
older or any bigger, so I totally understand that.
A costume could be a good transition, then, and this is the season to
buy them!! Maybe go to a thrift store and look for used home made
stuff, not the commercial things. Or what about footie pajamas? I
saw a bunch at Target yesterday, for bigger kids. That would help,
in winter, around the house.
I used to hold my bigger kids and rock them and talk to them about
when they were babies, when they were in a mood like that, and give
them some juice in a baby bottle maybe, even if they were four or six.
Sandra
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> In recent days we have gotten more information about why Logan doesEach of my kids went through a phase or two of not wanting to get any
> not want to get dressed.
> He told us that when he wears his blue shirt and diaper only, he is a
> little baby...and that pants are for big boys.-=-
older or any bigger, so I totally understand that.
A costume could be a good transition, then, and this is the season to
buy them!! Maybe go to a thrift store and look for used home made
stuff, not the commercial things. Or what about footie pajamas? I
saw a bunch at Target yesterday, for bigger kids. That would help,
in winter, around the house.
I used to hold my bigger kids and rock them and talk to them about
when they were babies, when they were in a mood like that, and give
them some juice in a baby bottle maybe, even if they were four or six.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]