Sandra Dodd

I had side mail and responded, and mentioned Lori Odhner as a possible
resource, and looked Lori up to make sure she was findable, and we
communicated. Lori (who with Carol Rice was one of the two La Leche
League leaders who so profoundly changed my life when Kirby was a
baby) said she loved reading "Public School on your own Terms," an
article I had sent in the e-mail response to the other mom. So I
went to read it to see what Lori would've seen.

I have changed in twelve years. Most people have, probably, so that's
not a big deal, but because this article is really out there in many
places (in Linda Dobson's book, and so in Japanese, and various other
places), I wanted to bring one little passage here and say something
for the record.



-=-In families in which student-directed learning is the primary
focus, children taking control of their own learning by deciding
whether to pursue it at home or at school can be liberating for all
involved, and educational in the extreme for their teachers.

-=-Although the ideal might be children who have never gone to school
a day in their lives, reality isn�t always ideal.-=-



I was writing for a newsletter in California which was not "a radical
unschooling newsletter" (not that anything was, twelve years ago), but
was a politically-leaning "reject government schools" newsletter. I
lost my gig as an invited, featured columnist over this article.



BUT anyway...

I no longer use terms like 'Student directed learning," or "taking
control of their own learning." I quit thinking that way a long time
ago, and I was using phrases others were using anyway.



This phrase which sounds really inspiring, maybe, is also not in my
current voice or vocabulary: "The philosophies of choice, freedom,
child-led learning, �bliss-led learning,� and personal responsibility
can be honored and spread to new audiences by parents treating
children as humans with rights and responsibilities whether they are
sixteen, twelve, or eight years old."

I was trying to include all the terms in use in those days to describe
unschooling. I certainly get it all and can defend it, but "child-led
learning" has caused problems for people trying to get unschooling to
work. I used to assume that people would begin with a busy, enriched
and enriching life, but not everyone was making the same assumption or
starting from the same place. Some said "We're unschooling, starting
now," and then watched the kids to see when they were going to take
control or direct their own learning.

Choices in an environment maintained with learning in mind are
different from choices in a quiet, boring place. If I were a kid, my
choice in a quiet, boring place would be to go to school.

Also when I write that, in 1996, Holly was five years old. Now she's
nearly eighteen. -=-Although the ideal might be children who have
never gone to school a day in their lives, reality isn�t always ideal.-
=- Holly has been to school five or six days in her life, but she
was visiting, not enrolled, and wasn't always visiting a class of
people her own age.

Because I didn't compromise my beliefs, and continued to clarify and
strengthen them through discussions with other unschoolers, I have
children who have never gone to school. A full set. This is better
for me than a college degree. I've done something really special now,
something I'm proud of. I stuck with a project for nineteen years. I
was willing to let the kids choose not to stay home, and so I took
that gamble knowing that if home wasn't interesting enough school
still existed. If school was better than home, there it always was,
walking distance from the house.

For a while Holly did consider going to middle school. She asked kids
about what they liked and didn't like, and she would sit outside when
school let out and watch all the kids, see what they were wearing,
observe the fashions of how to wear what kinds of backpacks, and think
about it. We talked about what she might need to do if she wanted to
go, and while I wasn't wholly encouraging, I was willing. She would
have needed to practice her handwriting, and learn the pledge of
allegiance and a few things like that. Not much. She stayed home,
though, and so I have "the ideal" as I stated it when Holly was
"kindergarten age."

I didn't register Holly to homeschool. I had a backup plan (a copy of
the registration papers, notarized with a date, in case anyone asked;
I hadn't sent it in, though). I did that for a few years. The
state's processes and policies changed for registration, so I quit
even doing that.

I'm rambling now, but it takes a while to tell twelves years.



Sandra

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