a little more video of me, about saying "Yes"
Sandra Dodd
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/968679247/unschooling-the-movie/posts/357
If anyone wants to hear what I sound like in my regular life or see
what I look like (that's not the good part, if there's a good part),
the link above has something very recent, and if you want to support a
project to get some of this stuff on a DVD that would be available by
fall or end of summer, there's a link for that there, too.
The page I was talking about is this:
http://sandradodd.com/yes
Sandra
If anyone wants to hear what I sound like in my regular life or see
what I look like (that's not the good part, if there's a good part),
the link above has something very recent, and if you want to support a
project to get some of this stuff on a DVD that would be available by
fall or end of summer, there's a link for that there, too.
The page I was talking about is this:
http://sandradodd.com/yes
Sandra
kelly_sturman
I waited and thought a lot before posting this,
but now I'm going to go ahead.
I don't like this: "that's not the good part, if there's
a good part..."
It sounds to me like putting yourself down.
I must be projecting my own injured inner child
feelings, 'cause from what I know of you, you
don't put yourself down. Maybe you are joking,
and I am being sensitive and taking offense?
But it sounds to me like a put down, and I am especially
sensitive to that coming from a woman who has silver
hair and a fuller figure. I don't buy into the idea that
you have to look like a Barbie doll to be beautiful, and
I hope my kids won't buy into that idea, either. I also hope
my girls will not equate their worth with their or others
perceptions of their physical appeal, and I hope my sons
will not measure their girlfriends' worth by that standard.
I honestly can't believe that you meant it that way, as a put
down, but I heard it that way. Maybe an always unschooled child
wouldn't hear it that way, but I am here to say that a healing/deschooling
almost 40 y.o. woman can, and maybe there are kids who started
out in school, or school at home, who could hear a statement
like that as a put down.
I am sensitive to this because it is a habit I am breaking (putting
myself down), and it's an important one to break. When I put myself
down, I am modeling negativity for my kids AND I am putting them down
in the process.
I am loving all these videos, though, and am excited about
this movie.
Kelly Sturman
but now I'm going to go ahead.
I don't like this: "that's not the good part, if there's
a good part..."
It sounds to me like putting yourself down.
I must be projecting my own injured inner child
feelings, 'cause from what I know of you, you
don't put yourself down. Maybe you are joking,
and I am being sensitive and taking offense?
But it sounds to me like a put down, and I am especially
sensitive to that coming from a woman who has silver
hair and a fuller figure. I don't buy into the idea that
you have to look like a Barbie doll to be beautiful, and
I hope my kids won't buy into that idea, either. I also hope
my girls will not equate their worth with their or others
perceptions of their physical appeal, and I hope my sons
will not measure their girlfriends' worth by that standard.
I honestly can't believe that you meant it that way, as a put
down, but I heard it that way. Maybe an always unschooled child
wouldn't hear it that way, but I am here to say that a healing/deschooling
almost 40 y.o. woman can, and maybe there are kids who started
out in school, or school at home, who could hear a statement
like that as a put down.
I am sensitive to this because it is a habit I am breaking (putting
myself down), and it's an important one to break. When I put myself
down, I am modeling negativity for my kids AND I am putting them down
in the process.
I am loving all these videos, though, and am excited about
this movie.
Kelly Sturman
--- In [email protected], Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...> wrote:
>
> http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/968679247/unschooling-the-movie/posts/357
>
> If anyone wants to hear what I sound like in my regular life or see
> what I look like (that's not the good part, if there's a good part),
Jenny C
I don't buy into the idea that
nothing wrong with that either. Chamille and Cyle and I were talking
about this very idea yesterday. They have a friend that is attractive,
yet nitpicks himself and searches out people with similar attractive
qualities. It doesn't seem to matter if they are nice or not, as long
as they are good looking.
Both Chamille and Cyle are attractive people, yet they like each other
for many other reasons and they make each other happy and recognize that
it's a full deal. If they didn't have much in common neither of them
would settle with just looks. Sometimes that level of understanding on
their part surprises me because they are both really young.
Cyle's dad was initially really concerned that Chamille was older than
his son and that they were so intense with each other. We had a long
talk about the kinds of things they are both into. He relaxed a bit
when he realized that they had so much in common, actually he was really
surprised by the fact that Chamille liked the same kind of things that
Cyle is into since not many girls are.
her. My mom used to call herself ugly. I connected the two and cried
about it because I didn't want to be ugly, hadn't considered myself ugly
before that time, nor did I want to grow up to become ugly. I caught my
sister doing that to one of her daughters and I called her on it. My
sister is gorgeous, by the way, she just doesn't think so herself.
On the rare occasion that I've felt not so beautiful and said as much,
my husband was very quick to point out that I was also putting him down
as well, since he finds me beautiful. So by saying that I wasn't
beautiful, I put myself down and also my husband's sense of aesthetic.
I try very hard to keep those thoughts to myself, and mostly I don't
feel that way about myself or anybody else, but those premenstral blues
can hit me hard on occasion.
> you have to look like a Barbie doll to be beautiful, andHowever if you do happen to look like barbie or a super model, there is
> I hope my kids won't buy into that idea, either. I also hope
> my girls will not equate their worth with their or others
> perceptions of their physical appeal, and I hope my sons
> will not measure their girlfriends' worth by that standard.
nothing wrong with that either. Chamille and Cyle and I were talking
about this very idea yesterday. They have a friend that is attractive,
yet nitpicks himself and searches out people with similar attractive
qualities. It doesn't seem to matter if they are nice or not, as long
as they are good looking.
Both Chamille and Cyle are attractive people, yet they like each other
for many other reasons and they make each other happy and recognize that
it's a full deal. If they didn't have much in common neither of them
would settle with just looks. Sometimes that level of understanding on
their part surprises me because they are both really young.
Cyle's dad was initially really concerned that Chamille was older than
his son and that they were so intense with each other. We had a long
talk about the kinds of things they are both into. He relaxed a bit
when he realized that they had so much in common, actually he was really
surprised by the fact that Chamille liked the same kind of things that
Cyle is into since not many girls are.
> I am sensitive to this because it is a habit I am breaking (puttingMy mom used to put herself down. People used to say that I looked like
> myself down), and it's an important one to break. When I put myself
> down, I am modeling negativity for my kids AND I am putting them down
> in the process.
her. My mom used to call herself ugly. I connected the two and cried
about it because I didn't want to be ugly, hadn't considered myself ugly
before that time, nor did I want to grow up to become ugly. I caught my
sister doing that to one of her daughters and I called her on it. My
sister is gorgeous, by the way, she just doesn't think so herself.
On the rare occasion that I've felt not so beautiful and said as much,
my husband was very quick to point out that I was also putting him down
as well, since he finds me beautiful. So by saying that I wasn't
beautiful, I put myself down and also my husband's sense of aesthetic.
I try very hard to keep those thoughts to myself, and mostly I don't
feel that way about myself or anybody else, but those premenstral blues
can hit me hard on occasion.
Sandra Dodd
-=-I am sensitive to this because it is a habit I am breaking (putting
myself down), and it's an important one to break. When I put myself
down, I am modeling negativity for my kids AND I am putting them down
in the process.-=-
I don't agree that I'm putting my kids down in the process of being
self-deprecating.
I don't "put myself down" much. My confidence can be fairly
irritating, and I can speak in public, and if I'm at a gathering or
party or working on a project and things seem to be about to fall
apart, I can sometimes just fix it without much effort and then go
back to just being there. I rescued a wedding ceremony just the other
day.
Not many people like to hear recordings of their voices or watch
themselves in film. Sometimes I say something I'm proud of having
said, but usually I wish I had gotten to the point a little more
poetically or directly. I look at the shelves behind me and wish I
had straightened them up. I can wish that. You might have wished it
too, or you might not even have looked at the shelves.
I'm not at all Eeyore-like about myself. I've been working on
summarizing my entire website for a book. It's not easy. Yesterday I
was up to move (because I get tense and agitated, and so I get up to
do something physical) and realized, as I was loading the washing
machine, that there's not another person who could do this better than
I can. Kind of obvious, perhaps, but realizing that no one else in
the world could summarize my website remotely close to the way I can
do it calmed me right down. (Being calmed down passes, because it's
a big job and I think really fast and I get tired of thinking and
writing.)
-=-If anyone wants to hear what I sound like in my regular life or see
what I look like (that's not the good part, if there's a good part),
the link above has something very recent, and if you want to support a
project to get some of this stuff on a DVD that would be available by
fall or end of summer, there's a link for that there, too.-=-
I'm not for looking at. That's not a bad thing. Maybe I'm worth
listening to anyway. I think my writing is better than my speaking,
but here's some more of that. My point was that if people wanted to
have a voice and all to go with my writing, there was a sample of me.
If I really cared what I looked like maybe I would wear makeup or get
a haircut or wear something besides a t-shirt, but honestly that's not
where I have EVER lived, in looks. I've lived in my head and in
books, and for most of you I live on this list or my blogs. It
doesn't usually matter what I look like at all, to anyone who reads
this.
Here's a little e-mail exchange between the filmmaker and me the other
day:
Lee:
I thought it was good....Lauren did, too...
Me:
that cause me no hesitation or concern. Having a bunch of people
paying to look at my face... I pause for a moment. So it goes.
-=- I . . . hope
my girls will not equate their worth with their or others
perceptions of their physical appeal, and I hope my sons
will not measure their girlfriends' worth by that standard.-=-
"Worth" for what, though? I type REALLY fast. I'm pretty good with
pens and ink and I have screen printing equipment. That's worth
something--my knowledge and experience. I know a lot about
unschooling; that's worth something. I amuse Keith and I make his bed
and do his laundry. He likes that. That's part of my worth in our
relationship--he's well rested and has work clothes every morning.
Marty's girlfriend can sew. That's HUGELY useful, because they're
both in the SCA and they need costumes. She doesn't cook. She's not
worth as much as someone who can cook, in terms of providing food for
a potential future family. That's worth considering, on Marty's
part. How poor will they be if they eat out all the time, or how
healthy if they have to eat microwavable freezer food all the time?
There are times when physical attributes are important for certain
things. A friend was in the honor guard doing rifle drill routines
and marching with flags and coffins at Arlington National Cemetery.
He was doing that partly, perhaps, because he was a little crazy and
it was safer than putting him in other jobs. But the criteria for
being at that task were being over 6' tall and not having facial
scars. It got him out of combat, which might have been good for more
people than himself.
Maybe I'm missing the point a little, but I don't feel ashamed of
having been self-deprecating about a little video. I'm willing to be
persuaded otherwise.
Sandra
If you need someone to sing into a microphone, hand it to me. If you
need someone to swim across a river, I'm not the one.
If you need someone to be the beautiful face of unschooling, I could
recommend several people. If we need a billboard, put Brenna and
Holly. For moms? Kelli Traaseth. Ren Allen. Danielle Conger. Let
them be the pinup moms, if we need some.
myself down), and it's an important one to break. When I put myself
down, I am modeling negativity for my kids AND I am putting them down
in the process.-=-
I don't agree that I'm putting my kids down in the process of being
self-deprecating.
I don't "put myself down" much. My confidence can be fairly
irritating, and I can speak in public, and if I'm at a gathering or
party or working on a project and things seem to be about to fall
apart, I can sometimes just fix it without much effort and then go
back to just being there. I rescued a wedding ceremony just the other
day.
Not many people like to hear recordings of their voices or watch
themselves in film. Sometimes I say something I'm proud of having
said, but usually I wish I had gotten to the point a little more
poetically or directly. I look at the shelves behind me and wish I
had straightened them up. I can wish that. You might have wished it
too, or you might not even have looked at the shelves.
I'm not at all Eeyore-like about myself. I've been working on
summarizing my entire website for a book. It's not easy. Yesterday I
was up to move (because I get tense and agitated, and so I get up to
do something physical) and realized, as I was loading the washing
machine, that there's not another person who could do this better than
I can. Kind of obvious, perhaps, but realizing that no one else in
the world could summarize my website remotely close to the way I can
do it calmed me right down. (Being calmed down passes, because it's
a big job and I think really fast and I get tired of thinking and
writing.)
-=-If anyone wants to hear what I sound like in my regular life or see
what I look like (that's not the good part, if there's a good part),
the link above has something very recent, and if you want to support a
project to get some of this stuff on a DVD that would be available by
fall or end of summer, there's a link for that there, too.-=-
I'm not for looking at. That's not a bad thing. Maybe I'm worth
listening to anyway. I think my writing is better than my speaking,
but here's some more of that. My point was that if people wanted to
have a voice and all to go with my writing, there was a sample of me.
If I really cared what I looked like maybe I would wear makeup or get
a haircut or wear something besides a t-shirt, but honestly that's not
where I have EVER lived, in looks. I've lived in my head and in
books, and for most of you I live on this list or my blogs. It
doesn't usually matter what I look like at all, to anyone who reads
this.
Here's a little e-mail exchange between the filmmaker and me the other
day:
Lee:
I thought it was good....Lauren did, too...
Me:
> Thanks.Lee:
> You guys know more about it than I do. I just see all the flaws and
> don't like my face and don't like my voice, but it's nice that the
> curtain was moving. The plant looked good!
>
> The information was probably good, too.
>
> And I suppose when I'm even older or maybe dead, it will be great
> that these recordings exist, so thank you for that.
>
> Sandra
> For a lot of people, I think it's good they exist right now. EvenI'm not fishing for compliments or support. There are things about me
> with you alive and everything.
that cause me no hesitation or concern. Having a bunch of people
paying to look at my face... I pause for a moment. So it goes.
-=- I . . . hope
my girls will not equate their worth with their or others
perceptions of their physical appeal, and I hope my sons
will not measure their girlfriends' worth by that standard.-=-
"Worth" for what, though? I type REALLY fast. I'm pretty good with
pens and ink and I have screen printing equipment. That's worth
something--my knowledge and experience. I know a lot about
unschooling; that's worth something. I amuse Keith and I make his bed
and do his laundry. He likes that. That's part of my worth in our
relationship--he's well rested and has work clothes every morning.
Marty's girlfriend can sew. That's HUGELY useful, because they're
both in the SCA and they need costumes. She doesn't cook. She's not
worth as much as someone who can cook, in terms of providing food for
a potential future family. That's worth considering, on Marty's
part. How poor will they be if they eat out all the time, or how
healthy if they have to eat microwavable freezer food all the time?
There are times when physical attributes are important for certain
things. A friend was in the honor guard doing rifle drill routines
and marching with flags and coffins at Arlington National Cemetery.
He was doing that partly, perhaps, because he was a little crazy and
it was safer than putting him in other jobs. But the criteria for
being at that task were being over 6' tall and not having facial
scars. It got him out of combat, which might have been good for more
people than himself.
Maybe I'm missing the point a little, but I don't feel ashamed of
having been self-deprecating about a little video. I'm willing to be
persuaded otherwise.
Sandra
If you need someone to sing into a microphone, hand it to me. If you
need someone to swim across a river, I'm not the one.
If you need someone to be the beautiful face of unschooling, I could
recommend several people. If we need a billboard, put Brenna and
Holly. For moms? Kelli Traaseth. Ren Allen. Danielle Conger. Let
them be the pinup moms, if we need some.
kelly_sturman
A lot to think about. I will respond just to two small bits...
about a trait in myself that I have passed down to them; ex: f I make a
negative comment about curly hair, which they have both inherited from
me. But, my kids are deschooling, and yours were never schooled, so that
makes an huge difference. Anyway, it's just better if I don't complain about
the curls. If I'm feeling they're too hard to control, I could just cut 'em short.
rich environment... so many things to explore... so homey..."
Some people actually buy books by the yard to decorate their homes
or restaurants or whatever. Straightened up shelves can look that way:
like a prop for a set, or something that is only there "for looks," to
set a certain mood. Your shelves looked like real shelves, which looks
much better, to me anyway.
Okay, three points... The sticky wicket:
and wearing the latest fashion. I definitely understand that there
are lots of qualities to build a foundation of self-esteem on, and
that one can be completely unconcerned with appearances, and
maybe that is best, to be above and beyond the concern...
Hmm... much to think about...
Kelly Sturman
> I don't agree that I'm putting my kids down in the process of beingI DO feel like my biological kids could feel put down if I am negative
> self-deprecating.
about a trait in myself that I have passed down to them; ex: f I make a
negative comment about curly hair, which they have both inherited from
me. But, my kids are deschooling, and yours were never schooled, so that
makes an huge difference. Anyway, it's just better if I don't complain about
the curls. If I'm feeling they're too hard to control, I could just cut 'em short.
> I look at the shelves behind me and wish I had straightened them up.I actually did notice the shelves, and my thought was, "What a lovely,
> I can wish that. You might have wished it too, or you might not even have
> looked at the shelves.
rich environment... so many things to explore... so homey..."
Some people actually buy books by the yard to decorate their homes
or restaurants or whatever. Straightened up shelves can look that way:
like a prop for a set, or something that is only there "for looks," to
set a certain mood. Your shelves looked like real shelves, which looks
much better, to me anyway.
Okay, three points... The sticky wicket:
> If I really cared what I looked like maybe I would wear makeup or getOr maybe women look good without makeup and fancy hairdos
> a haircut or wear something besides a t-shirt.. <snip> ...
> I'm not for looking at.
and wearing the latest fashion. I definitely understand that there
are lots of qualities to build a foundation of self-esteem on, and
that one can be completely unconcerned with appearances, and
maybe that is best, to be above and beyond the concern...
Hmm... much to think about...
Kelly Sturman
kelly_sturman
> However if you do happen to look like barbie or a super model, there isAs long as it is not the epicenter of one's self-esteem. One of my
> nothing wrong with that either.
daughters gets a lot of attention for her looks, has even done
a bit of acting and appeared in a public service announcement
that aired nationally, but she doesn't value her looks more
than her intellect, or her curiosity, or her kindness, or her generosity.
Her sense of self is built on all of them, and that's good.
Kelly Sturman
Sandra Dodd
-=-The sticky wicket:
and wearing the latest fashion. I definitely understand that there
are lots of qualities to build a foundation of self-esteem on, and
that one can be completely unconcerned with appearances, and
maybe that is best, to be above and beyond the concern... -=-
I don't know that it's best. It's just what I came into the world
with, maybe, or what evolved. I had the intrapersonal and
interpersonal. I had the verbal and the music. Not so much the
kinesthetic or the spatial.
I don't think it's better to have some and not others than to have the
others and not my some.
-=maybe women look good without makeup and fancy hairdos
and wearing the latest fashion.-=-
I don't get to say what others should think looks good. I enjoyed a
photo spread recently of famous guys with nice chests and abs. My
husband's strong, and tall, and honest, but isn't great looking in the
chest and abs. Legs he's got--he's won a couple of "comely limb"
contests in the SCA, and once tied with a ballet dancer. That's
impressive. But he was young and now he has big veins and several
scars. But I didn't love Keith for his legs. I loved him for his
singing voice and organizational skills! He wished I had loved him
for his long blond hair, but that was just okay. My hair was longer.
<g>
I can see giving people pep talks to keep them from becoming
immobilized by self-conscious fears. I can see calling me on being a
bad example, and I don't mind that.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> If I really cared what I looked like maybe I would wear makeup or getOr maybe women look good without makeup and fancy hairdos
> a haircut or wear something besides a t-shirt.. <snip> ...
> I'm not for looking at.
and wearing the latest fashion. I definitely understand that there
are lots of qualities to build a foundation of self-esteem on, and
that one can be completely unconcerned with appearances, and
maybe that is best, to be above and beyond the concern... -=-
I don't know that it's best. It's just what I came into the world
with, maybe, or what evolved. I had the intrapersonal and
interpersonal. I had the verbal and the music. Not so much the
kinesthetic or the spatial.
I don't think it's better to have some and not others than to have the
others and not my some.
-=maybe women look good without makeup and fancy hairdos
and wearing the latest fashion.-=-
I don't get to say what others should think looks good. I enjoyed a
photo spread recently of famous guys with nice chests and abs. My
husband's strong, and tall, and honest, but isn't great looking in the
chest and abs. Legs he's got--he's won a couple of "comely limb"
contests in the SCA, and once tied with a ballet dancer. That's
impressive. But he was young and now he has big veins and several
scars. But I didn't love Keith for his legs. I loved him for his
singing voice and organizational skills! He wished I had loved him
for his long blond hair, but that was just okay. My hair was longer.
<g>
I can see giving people pep talks to keep them from becoming
immobilized by self-conscious fears. I can see calling me on being a
bad example, and I don't mind that.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-The sticky wicket:
and wearing the latest fashion. I definitely understand that there
are lots of qualities to build a foundation of self-esteem on, and
that one can be completely unconcerned with appearances, and
maybe that is best, to be above and beyond the concern... -=-
I don't know that it's best. It's just what I came into the world
with, maybe, or what evolved. I had the intrapersonal and
interpersonal. I had the verbal and the music. Not so much the
kinesthetic or the spatial.
I don't think it's better to have some and not others than to have the
others and not my some.
-=maybe women look good without makeup and fancy hairdos
and wearing the latest fashion.-=-
I don't get to say what others should think looks good. I enjoyed a
photo spread recently of famous guys with nice chests and abs. My
husband's strong, and tall, and honest, but isn't great looking in the
chest and abs. Legs he's got--he's won a couple of "comely limb"
contests in the SCA, and once tied with a ballet dancer. That's
impressive. But he was young and now he has big veins and several
scars. But I didn't love Keith for his legs. I loved him for his
singing voice and organizational skills! He wished I had loved him
for his long blond hair, but that was just okay. My hair was longer.
<g>
I can see giving people pep talks to keep them from becoming
immobilized by self-conscious fears. I can see calling me on being a
bad example, and I don't mind that.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> If I really cared what I looked like maybe I would wear makeup or getOr maybe women look good without makeup and fancy hairdos
> a haircut or wear something besides a t-shirt.. <snip> ...
> I'm not for looking at.
and wearing the latest fashion. I definitely understand that there
are lots of qualities to build a foundation of self-esteem on, and
that one can be completely unconcerned with appearances, and
maybe that is best, to be above and beyond the concern... -=-
I don't know that it's best. It's just what I came into the world
with, maybe, or what evolved. I had the intrapersonal and
interpersonal. I had the verbal and the music. Not so much the
kinesthetic or the spatial.
I don't think it's better to have some and not others than to have the
others and not my some.
-=maybe women look good without makeup and fancy hairdos
and wearing the latest fashion.-=-
I don't get to say what others should think looks good. I enjoyed a
photo spread recently of famous guys with nice chests and abs. My
husband's strong, and tall, and honest, but isn't great looking in the
chest and abs. Legs he's got--he's won a couple of "comely limb"
contests in the SCA, and once tied with a ballet dancer. That's
impressive. But he was young and now he has big veins and several
scars. But I didn't love Keith for his legs. I loved him for his
singing voice and organizational skills! He wished I had loved him
for his long blond hair, but that was just okay. My hair was longer.
<g>
I can see giving people pep talks to keep them from becoming
immobilized by self-conscious fears. I can see calling me on being a
bad example, and I don't mind that.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
harmonyhogan
I look at the shelves behind me and wish I
Harmony
> had straightened them up. I can wish that. You might have wished itI looked at the shelves too. That was the first thing I noticed. I thought to myself that I would have straightened up the shelves, and I am so impressed that someone else can make a movie to show the world and not even care about the shelves. It made me look around my house at my cluttered shelves that get used and appreciate them more than the clean organized shelves that don't get used.
> too, or you might not even have looked at the shelves.
Harmony
Ren Allen
~~If I really cared what I looked like maybe I would wear makeup or get
a haircut or wear something besides a t-shirt, but honestly that's not
where I have EVER lived, in looks~~
But she let me put makeup on her, once up on a time, just fer fun.
Then we went and did an unschooling talk.;) Makeup and looks and fashion are a big part of my life. Not the most important part, but one should be careful about shunning those things too, because some of us are passionate about those things. My parents shunned it and some part of ME was shunned because they didn't like something I LOVED.
Fashion and barbie and looks and makeup aren't bad things. A person with holes in their spirit (thank you Diana Jenner for that phrase) might try to fill the holes with superficial things, or maybe drugs or something else. A person comfortable with themselves and interested in their own unfolding can just as easily pursue it all without making it a "hole filler". :)
Human beings have been adorning themselves in any number of ways since the beginning of time. Being concerned about our "look" is completely natural and normal. It's just as natural and normal for someone to not be concerned about it much at all.
Ren
radicalunschooling.blogspot.com
a haircut or wear something besides a t-shirt, but honestly that's not
where I have EVER lived, in looks~~
But she let me put makeup on her, once up on a time, just fer fun.
Then we went and did an unschooling talk.;) Makeup and looks and fashion are a big part of my life. Not the most important part, but one should be careful about shunning those things too, because some of us are passionate about those things. My parents shunned it and some part of ME was shunned because they didn't like something I LOVED.
Fashion and barbie and looks and makeup aren't bad things. A person with holes in their spirit (thank you Diana Jenner for that phrase) might try to fill the holes with superficial things, or maybe drugs or something else. A person comfortable with themselves and interested in their own unfolding can just as easily pursue it all without making it a "hole filler". :)
Human beings have been adorning themselves in any number of ways since the beginning of time. Being concerned about our "look" is completely natural and normal. It's just as natural and normal for someone to not be concerned about it much at all.
Ren
radicalunschooling.blogspot.com
kelly_sturman
Thanks, Ren, for even more to think about.
My kids (and I!) like pictures/depictions of
cultures where *men* adorn themselves.
One of my daughters approaches history
from the perspective of fashion. That's cool.
One of my sons approaches history from
the perspective of battles. A more typically
"schoolish" approach, I guess, expect that he's
much more interested tactics/strategies than
in names and dates.
I learn so much alongside them, all of them.
And all of you.
Kelly Sturman
My kids (and I!) like pictures/depictions of
cultures where *men* adorn themselves.
One of my daughters approaches history
from the perspective of fashion. That's cool.
One of my sons approaches history from
the perspective of battles. A more typically
"schoolish" approach, I guess, expect that he's
much more interested tactics/strategies than
in names and dates.
I learn so much alongside them, all of them.
And all of you.
Kelly Sturman
Sandra Dodd
-=-Fashion and barbie and looks and makeup aren't bad things.-=-
Holly loves them all and I appreciate her interest. It is one of
those unfortunate things, that I have a girly daughter, and a couple
of girly mom-friends of mine have non-girly-girls. We endure as best
we can. <bwg>
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Holly loves them all and I appreciate her interest. It is one of
those unfortunate things, that I have a girly daughter, and a couple
of girly mom-friends of mine have non-girly-girls. We endure as best
we can. <bwg>
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Gwen
Or you get really lucky and get one of each!
Megan (almost eight!) refuses to shop in the girls section because everything is too pink and frilly. Her favorite outfit right now is a pair of boys athletic shorts and any of the Big Dog character t-shirts she picked out (Iron Dog, instead of Iron Man, Spongedog instead of Spongebob). BUT - she accessorized her outfit last week with a dangly, purple disco ball earring (just one).
Zoe (three in October) loves pink and is picky about what she wears. Last week, she picked up a pair of shorts in a store and pointed out that she liked the "stuff" on the front (sequins or sparklies of some kind). At another store she said she liked a shirt and skirt combo and pointed out what she liked about them.
When Megan played with make up she drew animal spots and stripes on her face. I think that when Zoe plays with make up it will be another story!
Gwen
Megan (almost eight!) refuses to shop in the girls section because everything is too pink and frilly. Her favorite outfit right now is a pair of boys athletic shorts and any of the Big Dog character t-shirts she picked out (Iron Dog, instead of Iron Man, Spongedog instead of Spongebob). BUT - she accessorized her outfit last week with a dangly, purple disco ball earring (just one).
Zoe (three in October) loves pink and is picky about what she wears. Last week, she picked up a pair of shorts in a store and pointed out that she liked the "stuff" on the front (sequins or sparklies of some kind). At another store she said she liked a shirt and skirt combo and pointed out what she liked about them.
When Megan played with make up she drew animal spots and stripes on her face. I think that when Zoe plays with make up it will be another story!
Gwen
--- On Wed, 6/24/09, Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...> wrote:
those unfortunate things, that I have a girly daughter, and a couple
of girly mom-friends of mine have non-girly-girls. We endure as best
we can. <bwg>
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]