lbgjones

Well, I've finally done it - today is the last day of school for my 8 & 9 year old. Now that the time has come, I'm having some last minute fears (you know, is this the right thing to do, will I be able to do it, etc, etc). It doesn't help that my youngest's teacher asked why I was doing it so close to the end of the year, that she thought it was a bad idea to start now. As is usually the case with me, when confronted I can never remember all of the arguments for my position. So I'm feeling a little doubt. Plus, we told the in-laws this weekend and they had a ton of questions about my ability and socialization, blah, blah, blah. I try to ignore them - I know it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks - but it's really hard not to second guess myself about homeschooling, much less unschooling.

Anyway, I guess I just need some words of encouragement please.

Thanks!

Sandra Dodd

Here's something important: These kids will need deschooling time,
but summer doesn't count. They were living on a school schedule, and
they "earned" the summer "off." So May, (june, july), August,
September, October, November.... It might be that long before they
can even begin to really want to explore anything that might seem
"academic" at all, and that's IF you're able to totally deschool that
whole time.

http://sandradodd.com/deschooling

So plan on six months of summer vacation, on 180 Saturdays all in a row!

Fun ones. <g>

Sandra

Pam Sorooshian

My suggestion is that when people question it or comment negatively, you
have some pat answers ready that help you not engage right then and there.

Say things like, "Well, we're just going to give it a try, but I'll
consider what you've said."

That buys you time to gather your thoughts.

And - have FUN!!

-pam

On 4/24/2009 1:50 PM, lbgjones wrote:
> Anyway, I guess I just need some words of encouragement please.
>
>

[email protected]

Hi,



I'm also new, and just pulled my son Logan out of first grade two weeks ago. (I know a lot of you are also on Unschooling Basics, so I'll spare you all my long intro again!)



Just wanted to let you know, I'm right there with you. It's scary, but I know in my heart this is the right thing for our family. At the moment, we're in deschooling mode, and so far, so good. We're taking it nice and slow , I'm saying "yes" more, and I'm devouring everything I can get my hands on about unschooling.



This list (and a couple others) have already been extremely helpful to me. Take a deep breath....relax, and have fun. :)

Denise


----- Original Message -----
From: "lbgjones" <lindajones@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, April 24, 2009 12:50:06 PM GMT -09:00 Alaska
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Last day in Public School...








Well, I've finally done it - today is the last day of school for my 8 & 9 year old. Now that the time has come, I'm having some last minute fears (you know, is this the right thing to do, will I be able to do it, etc, etc). It doesn't help that my youngest's teacher asked why I was doing it so close to the end of the year, that she thought it was a bad idea to start now. As is usually the case with me, when confronted I can never remember all of the arguments for my position. So I'm feeling a little doubt. Plus, we told the in-laws this weekend and they had a ton of questions about my ability and socialization, blah, blah, blah. I try to ignore them - I know it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks - but it's really hard not to second guess myself about homeschooling, much less unschooling.

Anyway, I guess I just need some words of encouragement please.

Thanks!




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Crystal Byrd

My words of encouragement would be: Don't worry about it! Have fun, enjoy
your kids, play games, take walks, read books.



I pulled my kids last month (7 and 8), and got the same type of reaction
that you're getting. I think it's a normal reaction. what I had to explain
to people is that while my decision might have seemed sudden to them, it was
something I had been thinking about for a long time. To make matters even
more awkward, I was president of the PTA, so I had to resign from my
position at the same time. Led to some very interesting rumors about
arguments between myself and the principal that I had to lay to rest! LOL



Some people will be accepting of your decision, and others won't.
relationships will definitely change, but you're doing what's right for your
kids. And that is the most important thing you can do!



From: [email protected] [mailto:[email protected]]
On Behalf Of lbgjones
Sent: Friday, April 24, 2009 1:50 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Last day in Public School...








Well, I've finally done it - today is the last day of school for my 8 & 9
year old. Now that the time has come, I'm having some last minute fears (you
know, is this the right thing to do, will I be able to do it, etc, etc). It
doesn't help that my youngest's teacher asked why I was doing it so close to
the end of the year, that she thought it was a bad idea to start now. As is
usually the case with me, when confronted I can never remember all of the
arguments for my position. So I'm feeling a little doubt. Plus, we told the
in-laws this weekend and they had a ton of questions about my ability and
socialization, blah, blah, blah. I try to ignore them - I know it really
doesn't matter what anyone else thinks - but it's really hard not to second
guess myself about homeschooling, much less unschooling.

Anyway, I guess I just need some words of encouragement please.

Thanks!





[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Joanna Murphy

--- In [email protected], Pam Sorooshian <pamsoroosh@...> wrote:
>
> My suggestion is that when people question it or comment negatively, you
> have some pat answers ready that help you not engage right then and there.
>
> Say things like, "Well, we're just going to give it a try, but I'll
> consider what you've said."
>
> That buys you time to gather your thoughts.
>

And, "Well, we're just going to try if for now and see how it goes. Who knows..." along with a shoulder shrug. I never had anyone argue with that.

Joanna

Joanna Murphy

..."is this the right thing to do, will I be able to do it, etc, etc)."

While I don't know you, if you have a sincere desire to live an unschooling life and have fun with your children, it IS the right thing to do.

There must be something in the air this week. I've spoken in depth with two new, emerging unschooling moms who are at this minute bringing their children home from school. It's been so energizing for me (we've been homeschooling loosely, and then unschooling for 6 years now) to talk with new people and see all the potential for such a richer and better life. It's very exciting, and you have such an exciting time ahead of you with all the new depth that is there for you to discover. Life is so much more fun than school!

"It doesn't help that my youngest's teacher asked why I was doing it so close to the end of the year, that she thought it was a bad idea to start now."

Why? Is it because you won't teach your daughter to follow through? Or the inconsistency will be bad for her? Or... OMG! None of that matters. What you are actually doing is showing your daughter that you love her and are willing to support her even though her teacher (read: authority) doesn't approve. Taking her out (assuming that she wants to be at home) is a more powerful message of saying yes to life than it would be to wait until the end of the year.

Perhaps the teacher feels like it would send a bad message to everyone else to see someone simply choose to keep their child at home. What if everyone else with unhappy children were to get this crazy notion? Where would her job be? Scary. :-) It would be so much easier if you just quietly disappeared and didn't come back.

Have fun!! Eat ice cream for breakfast. Watch a movie before lunch. Cook pancakes together for dinner. Stay in jammies all day, one day. Read good stories. Plant some seeds. Paint abstractly with rich colors. Paint with tempera paint in the bathtub (but don't let it sit too long). Go shopping and go to a new restaurant. Make some playdough.

Joanna

Sandra Dodd

-=-Have fun!! Eat ice cream for breakfast. Watch a movie before lunch.
Cook pancakes together for dinner. Stay in jammies all day, one day.
Read good stories. Plant some seeds. Paint abstractly with rich
colors. Paint with tempera paint in the bathtub (but don't let it sit
too long). Go shopping and go to a new restaurant. Make some
playdough.-=-

Good ideas, though "watch a movie before lunch" didn't strike me as
unusual. <g>

In Marty's young/mid-teens, he had one day a week that he would
declare his home day, and to mark it, he would wear pajama pants all
day and not leave the house.

Plant seeds and water them (depending where you are) without a bunch
of promises or needs for them to grow. Then if they grow in a couple
or three weeks and become something, COOL! But don't plant a tomato
seed talking about dozens of future tomatoes and planetary benefits.
Just plant the seed to see if it will sprout, and if it doesn't, no
big deal.

Of course farmers NEED their seeds to sprout, but they're also
professionals.

For planting for fun, let it BE fun. Let the feel and smell of the
dirt or potting soil be the success of the day.

And about that playdough:
http://sandradodd.com/playdough

Even if your new-to-unschooling kid is 15, make some playdough. It
has sight, smell, texture, substance and warmth. Those things are
healing. (It has taste, but it's mostly salt.)

Sandra

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Joanna Murphy

> Even if your new-to-unschooling kid is 15, make some playdough. It
> has sight, smell, texture, substance and warmth. Those things are
> healing. (It has taste, but it's mostly salt.)
>
Yeah--my 13 yo son still loves to knead playdough. I just made some and I was noticing how good it felt to me to work it around. It's very calming and therapeutic.

Joanna

Jenny C

>>> Well, I've finally done it - today is the last day of school for my
8 & 9 year old. Now that the time has come, I'm having some last minute
fears (you know, is this the right thing to do, will I be able to do it,
etc, etc). >>>

It's so freeing! Think of it like a big field that you can just run and
run and run, under the blue sky and sunshine, surrounded by flowers.
It's not free like falling from an airplane, that would be scary!

It's so life changing to shed something our culture sees as necessary,
yet here you are proving that it isn't. The more time that passes, the
more comfortable it will feel and the less scary it is.

>>>It doesn't help that my youngest's teacher asked why I was doing it
so close to the end of the year, that she thought it was a bad idea to
start now. >>>

Of course! It just goes to show that she really doesn't know your
children. She can't see what it is that would be a good reason to pull
a kid out so soon before summer break.

>>>As is usually the case with me, when confronted I can never remember
all of the arguments for my position. So I'm feeling a little doubt.
Plus, we told the in-laws this weekend and they had a ton of questions
about my ability and socialization, blah, blah, blah. I try to ignore
them - I know it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks - but
it's really hard not to second guess myself about homeschooling, much
less unschooling.>>>

This will change over time as you get more comfortable with unschooling.
I know, for me it helped to just say homeschooling and leave it at that
and let others assume what they will. At this point in our unschooling
life, most of our relatives know that we unschool, or at the very least
know that we are extremely relaxed with our homeschooling, but we've
been doing it for almost 10 yrs now. My own parents don't agree with
what we are doing, but they don't interfere.

It might help to have handy resources for the extremely nosy relatives.
We've been lucky, in that, all of our relatives are pretty much "live
and let live" about stuff. It helps enormously that my husband is on
board with it all.