looking for advice on teen's behavior
crbrlw
Hi Everyone:
I've been reading this list for I think over a year, but rarely post. I'm struggling with a teen problem right now, and am hoping for some ideas. I'm not sure if it's an unschooling problem.
I lead a 4-H group of homeschooled, unschooled and public-schooled teens. It's a small group (under 10 kids). I try to facilitate the group in an unschooling manner.
My issue is with one of the public-schooled girls, who is 13 and her
interactions with the unschooling boys in the group. This child lives in my neighborhood, she's a friend of my daughter, and I've known her and her family for 7 years.
Normally when she's visiting with my daughter I have no issue with her and enjoy her company.
What I've notice since she's joined our 4-H group is that when she's around the boys her behavior complete changes. She is constantly talking, asking thoughtless questions, complimenting the boys on how strong, smart, etc they are, shrieking for the smallest reason, when we're doing woodworking or moving equipment talking bout how weak she is (she isn't!) and generally acting like she has two brain cells. There is another ps girl in the group who also gets caught up in this behavior.
The boys receiving the unwanted attention are 15yo unschoolers. I have
talked with their parents, telling them I'm trying to address the issue. My daughter has spoken with the boys about it. The boys appear to think the behavior is annoying.
I talked with both of the girls privately, telling them that when they
behave this way it's distracting for everyone in the group, is a safety hazard (we are doing beekeeping) and that if it persists I will
need to ask them to step away from the group.
Last week I spoke privately with the girl's parents. The parents were
great, said this was not the first time they've heard this, and
they did talk to their daughters.
The 13yo girl who is leading most of this behavior is still doing it. At the last meeting I had to threaten to send her home if she didn't
stop making baaing noises at the boys that live next door to us - the
neighbor boys were simply skateboarding on their driveway.
It's driving me crazy. It strikes me as sexual harassment of the boys. She seems to have no filter or understanding (until an adult
points it out to her) that her behavior is a problem.
How can I help her get this under control? Is this something I can help her with or should I just ask her to leave the group? My oldest daughter is 13 so I'm just now moving into working with teens.
Best wishes, Cara
I've been reading this list for I think over a year, but rarely post. I'm struggling with a teen problem right now, and am hoping for some ideas. I'm not sure if it's an unschooling problem.
I lead a 4-H group of homeschooled, unschooled and public-schooled teens. It's a small group (under 10 kids). I try to facilitate the group in an unschooling manner.
My issue is with one of the public-schooled girls, who is 13 and her
interactions with the unschooling boys in the group. This child lives in my neighborhood, she's a friend of my daughter, and I've known her and her family for 7 years.
Normally when she's visiting with my daughter I have no issue with her and enjoy her company.
What I've notice since she's joined our 4-H group is that when she's around the boys her behavior complete changes. She is constantly talking, asking thoughtless questions, complimenting the boys on how strong, smart, etc they are, shrieking for the smallest reason, when we're doing woodworking or moving equipment talking bout how weak she is (she isn't!) and generally acting like she has two brain cells. There is another ps girl in the group who also gets caught up in this behavior.
The boys receiving the unwanted attention are 15yo unschoolers. I have
talked with their parents, telling them I'm trying to address the issue. My daughter has spoken with the boys about it. The boys appear to think the behavior is annoying.
I talked with both of the girls privately, telling them that when they
behave this way it's distracting for everyone in the group, is a safety hazard (we are doing beekeeping) and that if it persists I will
need to ask them to step away from the group.
Last week I spoke privately with the girl's parents. The parents were
great, said this was not the first time they've heard this, and
they did talk to their daughters.
The 13yo girl who is leading most of this behavior is still doing it. At the last meeting I had to threaten to send her home if she didn't
stop making baaing noises at the boys that live next door to us - the
neighbor boys were simply skateboarding on their driveway.
It's driving me crazy. It strikes me as sexual harassment of the boys. She seems to have no filter or understanding (until an adult
points it out to her) that her behavior is a problem.
How can I help her get this under control? Is this something I can help her with or should I just ask her to leave the group? My oldest daughter is 13 so I'm just now moving into working with teens.
Best wishes, Cara