My sister made me cry
Angela Shaw
My sister made me tear up today. (I'll get to that below)
I was just reading on one of the unschooling lists recently about how people
on these lists keep in giving despite the mean emails they get sometimes. I
think it is a gift that you all give when you keep on keeping on despite
those mean emails. I can't thank you all enough. I used to be more vocal
locally about unschooling/parenting but I stopped because the nasty-grams I
occasionally got really brought me down and I didn't' want to be stressed.
I wanted to be in the present enjoying my kids. Anyway, I miss the positive
reinforcement that I would get sometimes from sharing our way of life
publicly. It is very satisfying to know you changed some child's life for
the better by sharing your own story. Anyway, I got a pat on the back today
from my sister from something she posted on facebook called 25 things about
me. (you write 25 things about yourself that you share with your friends.)
This is what she wrote and you guys get some of the credit for it because
you have really helped to shape my as a parent and person with what you have
shared over the years. :-) Thanks! Angela
<I cherish my sister's wisdom re: children, education, and life in general.
She reminds me to live/parent for today, not tomorrow.>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I was just reading on one of the unschooling lists recently about how people
on these lists keep in giving despite the mean emails they get sometimes. I
think it is a gift that you all give when you keep on keeping on despite
those mean emails. I can't thank you all enough. I used to be more vocal
locally about unschooling/parenting but I stopped because the nasty-grams I
occasionally got really brought me down and I didn't' want to be stressed.
I wanted to be in the present enjoying my kids. Anyway, I miss the positive
reinforcement that I would get sometimes from sharing our way of life
publicly. It is very satisfying to know you changed some child's life for
the better by sharing your own story. Anyway, I got a pat on the back today
from my sister from something she posted on facebook called 25 things about
me. (you write 25 things about yourself that you share with your friends.)
This is what she wrote and you guys get some of the credit for it because
you have really helped to shape my as a parent and person with what you have
shared over the years. :-) Thanks! Angela
<I cherish my sister's wisdom re: children, education, and life in general.
She reminds me to live/parent for today, not tomorrow.>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
On Jan 27, 2009, at 2:07 PM, Angela Shaw wrote:
three or four nastygrams (if you do go back to helping people who are
resisting help), it might boost your spirits.
Even people who lash out and tell me I suck or who blatantly wish me
ill don't actually cause me harm. And some of them do become better
parents, even if they'd never let me know in a hundred years. (Some
have told me, so I assume there are others. Even if none had told me,
human nature tends to say "NO" and then maybe yes later.)
Sandra
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>That's wonderful! If you could keep that in mind through the next
> <I cherish my sister's wisdom re: children, education, and life in
> general.
> She reminds me to live/parent for today, not tomorrow.>
three or four nastygrams (if you do go back to helping people who are
resisting help), it might boost your spirits.
Even people who lash out and tell me I suck or who blatantly wish me
ill don't actually cause me harm. And some of them do become better
parents, even if they'd never let me know in a hundred years. (Some
have told me, so I assume there are others. Even if none had told me,
human nature tends to say "NO" and then maybe yes later.)
Sandra
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Schuyler
The best response for me is to look at Simon and Linnaea. They are happy so much of the time and their lives are so full and exciting and engaging, whatever mean thing someone says to me about unschooling doesn't change that truth in my home.
Schuyler
________________________________
From: Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Tuesday, 27 January, 2009 9:18:15 PM
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] My sister made me cry
Schuyler
________________________________
From: Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Tuesday, 27 January, 2009 9:18:15 PM
Subject: Re: [AlwaysLearning] My sister made me cry
On Jan 27, 2009, at 2:07 PM, Angela Shaw wrote:
>
> <I cherish my sister's wisdom re: children, education, and life in
> general.
> She reminds me to live/parent for today, not tomorrow.>
That's wonderful! If you could keep that in mind through the next
three or four nastygrams (if you do go back to helping people who are
resisting help), it might boost your spirits.
Even people who lash out and tell me I suck or who blatantly wish me
ill don't actually cause me harm. And some of them do become better
parents, even if they'd never let me know in a hundred years. (Some
have told me, so I assume there are others. Even if none had told me,
human nature tends to say "NO" and then maybe yes later.)
Sandra
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------------------------------------
Yahoo! Groups Links
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Sandra Dodd
On Jan 27, 2009, at 2:21 PM, Schuyler wrote:
Yes. And if you share why you think your home is so peaceful and
fun, you make it possible for others to learn about unschooling, or at
least you give them permission to be nicer parents. Some people bite
when they'd rather leave things the same say they are.
Sandra
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> The best response for me is to look at Simon and Linnaea. They are------------------
> happy so much of the time and their lives are so full and exciting
> and engaging, whatever mean thing someone says to me about
> unschooling doesn't change that truth in my home.
Yes. And if you share why you think your home is so peaceful and
fun, you make it possible for others to learn about unschooling, or at
least you give them permission to be nicer parents. Some people bite
when they'd rather leave things the same say they are.
Sandra
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Jenny C
>happy so much of the time and their lives are so full and exciting and
> The best response for me is to look at Simon and Linnaea. They are
engaging, whatever mean thing someone says to me about unschooling
doesn't change that truth in my home.
>Exactly! When I get in those moments, the best and most wonderful thing
> Schuyler
>
for me to do is to turn and face the other direction. Face my kids,
turn towards their wonderfulness! It's interesting too, because when I
don't do that, they actually absorb my angst, so it's doubly wonderful
to turn and face my kids, because it helps me regain my happy center and
they maintain their happy center!
k
So many people look askance or come right out and say they're doubtful about
how I'm parenting Karl that it might make me doubt it myself if it weren't
for Karl. He is doing so well ... swimmingly, even when everything isn't
swimmingly. I'm perfectly happy with the thought that it's due to Karl
rather than me though. :D I do credit unschooling a great deal for how
well things are going with our family. That is so worth the unfounded
commentary. It's hilarious.
~Katherine
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how I'm parenting Karl that it might make me doubt it myself if it weren't
for Karl. He is doing so well ... swimmingly, even when everything isn't
swimmingly. I'm perfectly happy with the thought that it's due to Karl
rather than me though. :D I do credit unschooling a great deal for how
well things are going with our family. That is so worth the unfounded
commentary. It's hilarious.
~Katherine
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
k
On Jan 27, 2009, at 2:21 PM, Schuyler wrote:
least you give them permission to be nicer parents. Some people bite
when they'd rather leave things the same say they are.
Sandra <<<<
All three of my sisters-in-law have become more vocal about how they have
become more gentle in their parenting. This is a recent development.
Before me and Brian broke up for 1 1/2 years all but one were very vocal
about the punitive measures they used with the nine children between them,
all told. When I lived with one of those sisters-in-law, there was a lot of
comment about how lax my parenting was/is, and I rarely said much (in order
to avoid adding to the noise) unless it was to help Karl get what he
wanted/needed, at least some of the time... like ensuring that he wasn't
forced to eat things he didn't want. That sister-in-law is phasing out
spanking with all of her 5 boys, which was a nightly ritual as late as last
year. I guess the proof's in the pudding, so to speak. We have never
spanked Karl and the drudgery of nightly spankings perhaps has struck them
as completely unnecessary. I haven't heard any conversations about changes
in their parenting. Mum's the word. I don't mind. Their secret's safe
with me. And I'm happy the kids are somewhat more relaxed these days. ;)
~Katherine
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> The best response for me is to look at Simon and Linnaea. They are------------------
> happy so much of the time and their lives are so full and exciting
> and engaging, whatever mean thing someone says to me about
> unschooling doesn't change that truth in my home.
>>>> Yes. And if you share why you think your home is so peaceful andfun, you make it possible for others to learn about unschooling, or at
least you give them permission to be nicer parents. Some people bite
when they'd rather leave things the same say they are.
Sandra <<<<
All three of my sisters-in-law have become more vocal about how they have
become more gentle in their parenting. This is a recent development.
Before me and Brian broke up for 1 1/2 years all but one were very vocal
about the punitive measures they used with the nine children between them,
all told. When I lived with one of those sisters-in-law, there was a lot of
comment about how lax my parenting was/is, and I rarely said much (in order
to avoid adding to the noise) unless it was to help Karl get what he
wanted/needed, at least some of the time... like ensuring that he wasn't
forced to eat things he didn't want. That sister-in-law is phasing out
spanking with all of her 5 boys, which was a nightly ritual as late as last
year. I guess the proof's in the pudding, so to speak. We have never
spanked Karl and the drudgery of nightly spankings perhaps has struck them
as completely unnecessary. I haven't heard any conversations about changes
in their parenting. Mum's the word. I don't mind. Their secret's safe
with me. And I'm happy the kids are somewhat more relaxed these days. ;)
~Katherine
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k
>>>> I haven't heard any conversations about changes in their parenting.<<<<
The reason I know my sisters-in-law have become more vocal about being
gentler with their kids is through their conversations with Brian which he
sometimes relates to me.
There. Hope that makes more sense.
~Katherine
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