An outside account of how to screw it up
Sandra Dodd
This is a comment that was left out in public. I thought I'd bring
it here like a formaldahyded toad and dissect it for my own
curiosity. If anyone wants to watch, or help, here goes:
===================================================
We started like so many others, clueless, grabbing a packaged
curricula, and following directions. It was painful. Like public
schools, packaged curricula have to appeal to the masses and our boy
wasn’t the perfect average anything.
Over the years, we learned to take advantage of the best of what
homeschooling has to offer: Individualized education to meet the
individual needs and interests of our kids along with the values of
our family. Then he becomes a teenager.
We found that unschooling worked best for us at that point for him.
Now unschooling means I didn’t tell him what to learn and when to
learn it, but it didn’t mean he could sit around all day on his arse
watching tv or playing videos. I would ask him what his plans were
each morning and he knew if he didn’t have some constructive ideas
for educating himself, I’d come up with some for him. I think
unschooling worked for him out of the sheer stubborness of not
wanting to be told what to do.
Then comes the girl, nine years younger. We start her off unschooling
and she hates it. This child craves structure. She picks out her
subjects, but wants me to give her a list each week of what is
expected that week. She wants the math worksheets, the clear
structure. She’s the teenager now, in the Civil Air Patrol, and doing
well though she’ll probably never unschool.
Why do I bring up our story? Because educational choices are all
about finding what fits for that individual to thrive, and like
public school, one size doesn’t fit all.
=================================================================
Here are the internal organs and yucko parts I see:
Very bad definition of unschooling:
" unschooling means I didn’t tell him what to learn and when to learn
it, but it didn’t mean he could sit around all day on his arse
watching tv or playing videos."
He was already a teen at that point. She was giving up on structured
homeschooling with threats for her "stubborn" boy who was tired of
being told what to do. If he didn't have constructive plans for
educating himself, she would come up with some for him. That's like
mean moms who say "If you're bored you can mop the kitchen."
Perhaps, in that evidence, comes the reasons that her daughter hated
"unschooling."
Although she's in my city, it's not someone I know.
Here's where I found it:
<http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2008/09/22/a-better-learning-model-or-an-
excuse-for-indulgence-the-homeschooling-debate/#comment-72763>
On a Wall Street Journal blog called
THE JUGGLE: WSJ.com on choices and tradeoffs people make as they
juggle work and family.
There's an article called "Unschooling: A Better Learning Model, or
An Excuse For Indulgence?"
Sandra
it here like a formaldahyded toad and dissect it for my own
curiosity. If anyone wants to watch, or help, here goes:
===================================================
We started like so many others, clueless, grabbing a packaged
curricula, and following directions. It was painful. Like public
schools, packaged curricula have to appeal to the masses and our boy
wasn’t the perfect average anything.
Over the years, we learned to take advantage of the best of what
homeschooling has to offer: Individualized education to meet the
individual needs and interests of our kids along with the values of
our family. Then he becomes a teenager.
We found that unschooling worked best for us at that point for him.
Now unschooling means I didn’t tell him what to learn and when to
learn it, but it didn’t mean he could sit around all day on his arse
watching tv or playing videos. I would ask him what his plans were
each morning and he knew if he didn’t have some constructive ideas
for educating himself, I’d come up with some for him. I think
unschooling worked for him out of the sheer stubborness of not
wanting to be told what to do.
Then comes the girl, nine years younger. We start her off unschooling
and she hates it. This child craves structure. She picks out her
subjects, but wants me to give her a list each week of what is
expected that week. She wants the math worksheets, the clear
structure. She’s the teenager now, in the Civil Air Patrol, and doing
well though she’ll probably never unschool.
Why do I bring up our story? Because educational choices are all
about finding what fits for that individual to thrive, and like
public school, one size doesn’t fit all.
=================================================================
Here are the internal organs and yucko parts I see:
Very bad definition of unschooling:
" unschooling means I didn’t tell him what to learn and when to learn
it, but it didn’t mean he could sit around all day on his arse
watching tv or playing videos."
He was already a teen at that point. She was giving up on structured
homeschooling with threats for her "stubborn" boy who was tired of
being told what to do. If he didn't have constructive plans for
educating himself, she would come up with some for him. That's like
mean moms who say "If you're bored you can mop the kitchen."
Perhaps, in that evidence, comes the reasons that her daughter hated
"unschooling."
Although she's in my city, it's not someone I know.
Here's where I found it:
<http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2008/09/22/a-better-learning-model-or-an-
excuse-for-indulgence-the-homeschooling-debate/#comment-72763>
On a Wall Street Journal blog called
THE JUGGLE: WSJ.com on choices and tradeoffs people make as they
juggle work and family.
There's an article called "Unschooling: A Better Learning Model, or
An Excuse For Indulgence?"
Sandra
BRIAN POLIKOWSKY
She was defintely not unscholing if she could not se learning in video games and TV.
She did not trust her son and did not think of him greatly.
The daughter grew up watching that. She did not want to be the lazy stubborn kid.
So if her mom gives her a list of expectations for the week and she completes it than she is off the hook.
Plus it sounds like mom was the lazy one as she just expected her son to DO things that looked like learning instead of joining him and trying to find his pasions and providing him opportunitties. Like she just sat back and asked what he was up to. If it was something she deemed appropriate than fine, if not....
That is what I got from it. Not the unschooling I se her in this list.
Alex Polikowsky
http://polykow.blogspot.com/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingmn/
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
She did not trust her son and did not think of him greatly.
The daughter grew up watching that. She did not want to be the lazy stubborn kid.
So if her mom gives her a list of expectations for the week and she completes it than she is off the hook.
Plus it sounds like mom was the lazy one as she just expected her son to DO things that looked like learning instead of joining him and trying to find his pasions and providing him opportunitties. Like she just sat back and asked what he was up to. If it was something she deemed appropriate than fine, if not....
That is what I got from it. Not the unschooling I se her in this list.
Alex Polikowsky
http://polykow.blogspot.com/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingmn/
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
k
I can see why the daughter went into Civic Air Patrol, a status-oriented
move if you're looking to impress a parent who's unimpressed with
unschooling. It seems to me that, like my younger sisters who decided that
"earning the right to have a social life" is the way to get one, their
daughter looked on the older sibling's experience as a yardstick for what
*not* to do and went in that direction as far as she could go.
So both those kids are doing without the knowledge that their parents
support their own efforts to educate themselves and they're having the word
"unschooling" falsely slapped onto it into the bargain.
To some extent they're both experiencing having failed to meet their
parent's expectations, and having not done unschooling right. Unschooling
is the parent's goal and responsibility though, not the kids'. It's up to
parents to learn how to do it and make it happen.
What they've ended up with is not unschooling. That's authoritative
parenting. I can see that plain as day whether the parent(s) can or not.
Formaldehyded, dissected and dissertated. ;)
~Katherine
move if you're looking to impress a parent who's unimpressed with
unschooling. It seems to me that, like my younger sisters who decided that
"earning the right to have a social life" is the way to get one, their
daughter looked on the older sibling's experience as a yardstick for what
*not* to do and went in that direction as far as she could go.
So both those kids are doing without the knowledge that their parents
support their own efforts to educate themselves and they're having the word
"unschooling" falsely slapped onto it into the bargain.
To some extent they're both experiencing having failed to meet their
parent's expectations, and having not done unschooling right. Unschooling
is the parent's goal and responsibility though, not the kids'. It's up to
parents to learn how to do it and make it happen.
What they've ended up with is not unschooling. That's authoritative
parenting. I can see that plain as day whether the parent(s) can or not.
Formaldehyded, dissected and dissertated. ;)
~Katherine
On 10/6/08, Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...> wrote:
> This is a comment that was left out in public. I thought I'd bring
> it here like a formaldahyded toad and dissect it for my own
> curiosity. If anyone wants to watch, or help, here goes:
>
> ===================================================
>
> We started like so many others, clueless, grabbing a packaged
> curricula, and following directions. It was painful. Like public
> schools, packaged curricula have to appeal to the masses and our boy
> wasn't the perfect average anything.
> Over the years, we learned to take advantage of the best of what
> homeschooling has to offer: Individualized education to meet the
> individual needs and interests of our kids along with the values of
> our family. Then he becomes a teenager.
>
> We found that unschooling worked best for us at that point for him.
> Now unschooling means I didn't tell him what to learn and when to
> learn it, but it didn't mean he could sit around all day on his arse
> watching tv or playing videos. I would ask him what his plans were
> each morning and he knew if he didn't have some constructive ideas
> for educating himself, I'd come up with some for him. I think
> unschooling worked for him out of the sheer stubborness of not
> wanting to be told what to do.
>
> Then comes the girl, nine years younger. We start her off unschooling
> and she hates it. This child craves structure. She picks out her
> subjects, but wants me to give her a list each week of what is
> expected that week. She wants the math worksheets, the clear
> structure. She's the teenager now, in the Civil Air Patrol, and doing
> well though she'll probably never unschool.
>
> Why do I bring up our story? Because educational choices are all
> about finding what fits for that individual to thrive, and like
> public school, one size doesn't fit all.
> =================================================================
>
> Here are the internal organs and yucko parts I see:
>
> Very bad definition of unschooling:
> " unschooling means I didn't tell him what to learn and when to learn
> it, but it didn't mean he could sit around all day on his arse
> watching tv or playing videos."
>
> He was already a teen at that point. She was giving up on structured
> homeschooling with threats for her "stubborn" boy who was tired of
> being told what to do. If he didn't have constructive plans for
> educating himself, she would come up with some for him. That's like
> mean moms who say "If you're bored you can mop the kitchen."
>
> Perhaps, in that evidence, comes the reasons that her daughter hated
> "unschooling."
>
> Although she's in my city, it's not someone I know.
> Here's where I found it:
> <http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2008/09/22/a-better-learning-model-or-an-
> excuse-for-indulgence-the-homeschooling-debate/#comment-72763>
>
> On a Wall Street Journal blog called
> THE JUGGLE: WSJ.com on choices and tradeoffs people make as they
> juggle work and family.
>
> There's an article called "Unschooling: A Better Learning Model, or
> An Excuse For Indulgence?"
>
> Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Robin Bentley
To me, the writer is dismissive of her children, especially her son.
"Then comes the girl" is so dispassionate that I wouldn't have guessed
the subject was her daughter, if she hadn't already been writing about
her son.
There's a difference in how unschooling parents write about their
kids. Through difficult times or behavior, their love for their
children shines through. There's not much of that here. "Relationship"
doesn't even enter her thoughts.
It also sounds like the usual defensive "unschooling just doesn't work
for us." It never does, if it's always a means to the parent's end.
Robin B.
"Then comes the girl" is so dispassionate that I wouldn't have guessed
the subject was her daughter, if she hadn't already been writing about
her son.
There's a difference in how unschooling parents write about their
kids. Through difficult times or behavior, their love for their
children shines through. There's not much of that here. "Relationship"
doesn't even enter her thoughts.
It also sounds like the usual defensive "unschooling just doesn't work
for us." It never does, if it's always a means to the parent's end.
Robin B.
On Oct 6, 2008, at 5:13 AM, Sandra Dodd wrote:
> This is a comment that was left out in public. I thought I'd bring
> it here like a formaldahyded toad and dissect it for my own
> curiosity. If anyone wants to watch, or help, here goes:
>
> ===================================================
>
> We started like so many others, clueless, grabbing a packaged
> curricula, and following directions. It was painful. Like public
> schools, packaged curricula have to appeal to the masses and our boy
> wasn’t the perfect average anything.
> Over the years, we learned to take advantage of the best of what
> homeschooling has to offer: Individualized education to meet the
> individual needs and interests of our kids along with the values of
> our family. Then he becomes a teenager.
>
> We found that unschooling worked best for us at that point for him.
> Now unschooling means I didn’t tell him what to learn and when to
> learn it, but it didn’t mean he could sit around all day on his arse
> watching tv or playing videos. I would ask him what his plans were
> each morning and he knew if he didn’t have some constructive ideas
> for educating himself, I’d come up with some for him. I think
> unschooling worked for him out of the sheer stubborness of not
> wanting to be told what to do.
>
> Then comes the girl, nine years younger. We start her off unschooling
> and she hates it. This child craves structure. She picks out her
> subjects, but wants me to give her a list each week of what is
> expected that week. She wants the math worksheets, the clear
> structure. She’s the teenager now, in the Civil Air Patrol, and doing
> well though she’ll probably never unschool.
>
> Why do I bring up our story? Because educational choices are all
> about finding what fits for that individual to thrive, and like
> public school, one size doesn’t fit all.
Sandra Dodd
-=-To me, the writer is dismissive of her children, especially her son.
"Then comes the girl" is so dispassionate that I wouldn't have guessed
the subject was her daughter, if she hadn't already been writing about
her son.
-=-
Oh! You're so right.
I hadn't even noticed that, following the storyline of how one thing
led to worse thing.
They didn't have a partnership, it was still adversarial to the end.
Sandra
"Then comes the girl" is so dispassionate that I wouldn't have guessed
the subject was her daughter, if she hadn't already been writing about
her son.
-=-
Oh! You're so right.
I hadn't even noticed that, following the storyline of how one thing
led to worse thing.
They didn't have a partnership, it was still adversarial to the end.
Sandra