bigger lives
Sandra Dodd
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.
~Anais Nin
This came from the [email protected] list.
Although she uses the word "courage," it's what is discussed on this
list sometimes about making life bigger, more sparkly, about living
in the world, about creating a good nest.
I think of it as confidence. They're similar. Confidence grows from
the inside, though, while courage can be reckless.
Marty Dodd, my middle child (who's 18 and so not much of a child
anymore) is living in a big world. I know that he's shy, and the
ways that he's shy, but he's also confident, and some of the
confidence comes from experience and feedback. Learning.
The feedback from school and in school is so very often discouraging
and negative. Even the "best students" keep being reminded that
every school has top students and the competition's fierce.
We were talking about javelina's yesterday, my sister-in-law-of-sorts
and Marty and me. Her grandfather had a javelina head mounted on the
wall in his den and the grandkids were afraid of the whole room. We
were talking about how small they are, and how scary, and I've never
seen on in the wild and hope never to. She's older and lives further
south and has seen some.
Javelinas are fierce.
Thoughts about going into the world and finding friends and jobs and
opportunities shouldn't be thought of as "fierce." That isn't
confidence building. Schools claim to expand kids' lives, but at
the same time they specialize in shrinking them. Kids who aren't
"good students," their lives start shrinking from the time they're
six or seven. They don't get courage or confidence.
So when you're thinking about what unschooling can bring into your
life, don't forget confidence, or courage. And do things to build
that, so your children's lives and worlds expand.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
~Anais Nin
This came from the [email protected] list.
Although she uses the word "courage," it's what is discussed on this
list sometimes about making life bigger, more sparkly, about living
in the world, about creating a good nest.
I think of it as confidence. They're similar. Confidence grows from
the inside, though, while courage can be reckless.
Marty Dodd, my middle child (who's 18 and so not much of a child
anymore) is living in a big world. I know that he's shy, and the
ways that he's shy, but he's also confident, and some of the
confidence comes from experience and feedback. Learning.
The feedback from school and in school is so very often discouraging
and negative. Even the "best students" keep being reminded that
every school has top students and the competition's fierce.
We were talking about javelina's yesterday, my sister-in-law-of-sorts
and Marty and me. Her grandfather had a javelina head mounted on the
wall in his den and the grandkids were afraid of the whole room. We
were talking about how small they are, and how scary, and I've never
seen on in the wild and hope never to. She's older and lives further
south and has seen some.
Javelinas are fierce.
Thoughts about going into the world and finding friends and jobs and
opportunities shouldn't be thought of as "fierce." That isn't
confidence building. Schools claim to expand kids' lives, but at
the same time they specialize in shrinking them. Kids who aren't
"good students," their lives start shrinking from the time they're
six or seven. They don't get courage or confidence.
So when you're thinking about what unschooling can bring into your
life, don't forget confidence, or courage. And do things to build
that, so your children's lives and worlds expand.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]