it's official/i'm feeling Inactive as his facilitator
halfshadow1
Hi,My son turned 6yo. yesterday. So, i guess we are officially
unschoolers now. I wonder if i should do anything different? Sometimes
i want to say to him: You can learn anything you want but i want you
too want to learn something each day. Boy, that sounds dumb when i
write it down. I know he's learning all the time. I think what i'm
expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that. He
doesn't really ask alot of questions. I asked him if there was
something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
facilatator(sp). Hope this makes sense.
thanks,Heather
unschoolers now. I wonder if i should do anything different? Sometimes
i want to say to him: You can learn anything you want but i want you
too want to learn something each day. Boy, that sounds dumb when i
write it down. I know he's learning all the time. I think what i'm
expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that. He
doesn't really ask alot of questions. I asked him if there was
something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
facilatator(sp). Hope this makes sense.
thanks,Heather
Nancy Wooton
On Oct 6, 2007, at 2:43 PM, halfshadow1 wrote:
need to get some books for yourself. Take him along to a needlework
store, or an art supply store, or a museum or zoo because you want to
see something there. If he wants to check out books, or buy some yarn,
or get some clay or paints, cool, but you don't have to make the trip
about what he wants to learn; go because *you* want to (but don't take
too long in the needlework store <g>).
And most of all --
Take both of you to a bookstore that carries Frank Smith's "The Book of
Learning and Forgetting," buy a copy for yourself, and a book of your
son's choosing, and read together. Before you do anything like worry
or push or fret, read that book.
Nancy
>Learn something new for yourself. Take him to the library, because you
>
> Hi,My son turned 6yo. yesterday. So, i guess we are officially
> unschoolers now. I wonder if i should do anything different? Sometimes
> i want to say to him: You can learn anything you want but i want you
> too want to learn something each day. Boy, that sounds dumb when i
> write it down. I know he's learning all the time. I think what i'm
> expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
> learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that. He
> doesn't really ask alot of questions. I asked him if there was
> something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
> that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
> will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
> learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
> facilatator(sp). Hope this makes sense.
> thanks,Heather
>
need to get some books for yourself. Take him along to a needlework
store, or an art supply store, or a museum or zoo because you want to
see something there. If he wants to check out books, or buy some yarn,
or get some clay or paints, cool, but you don't have to make the trip
about what he wants to learn; go because *you* want to (but don't take
too long in the needlework store <g>).
And most of all --
Take both of you to a bookstore that carries Frank Smith's "The Book of
Learning and Forgetting," buy a copy for yourself, and a book of your
son's choosing, and read together. Before you do anything like worry
or push or fret, read that book.
Nancy
wisdomalways5
--- In [email protected], "halfshadow1" <halfshadow1@...>
wrote:
log of the things you see him doing- not just schooly things by life
things he learns-
my daughter is 4 and she was looking at a magazine that has swords in
it- she was looking at them and then said to me- I am thinking about
how they are made- I said ok- she then came over and said swords are
made with fire and water- and that is all she knew- now this is a
magaizne not a educational book so I have no idea where the knowledge
came from that you use fire and water to make swords- I said I think
you are right---
that was her learning or at least thinking about where something comes
from
wrote:
>you could try noticing one thing that he learned each day- just keep a
>
>
> Hi,My son turned 6yo. yesterday. So, i guess we are officially
> unschoolers now. I wonder if i should do anything different? Sometimes
> i want to say to him: You can learn anything you want but i want you
> too want to learn something each day.
log of the things you see him doing- not just schooly things by life
things he learns-
my daughter is 4 and she was looking at a magazine that has swords in
it- she was looking at them and then said to me- I am thinking about
how they are made- I said ok- she then came over and said swords are
made with fire and water- and that is all she knew- now this is a
magaizne not a educational book so I have no idea where the knowledge
came from that you use fire and water to make swords- I said I think
you are right---
that was her learning or at least thinking about where something comes
from
Gold Standard
>>SometimesEEEEERRRRRRRRRKKKKK (that was the sound of screeching breaks). As you noted,
>>i want to say to him: You can learn anything you want but i want you
>>too want to learn something each day.<<
this is NOT the voice of unschooling. This is a recording from your past
that needs to be erased. Completely. And maybe burned. Sacrificially.
>>I think what i'mIt rarely happened like that for my kids. It would be more like one of them
>>expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
>>learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that.<<
intently looking at a bug and then making some kind of sound and I would
look too and then we would both be looking intently at the bug and then one
of us would mention something interesting we're seeing and then we would
talk about that, or look something up.
Or it would be making cookies and measuring ingredients and seeing that the
teaspoon also said "5 ml" and what either of those things meant, and how to
know the difference between the different sized spoons.
The examples could go on and on. Rarely did I formally ask the question,
"What do you want to learn?" It was usually pretty evident, and when it
wasn't, or when things were lulling, I would be on the lookout for novel
experiences or books or events, etc. Or sometimes we just hung around. LOTS
of things came from that.
>>HeNo, he's probably just living. In natural living, most people don't ask lots
>>doesn't really ask alot of questions.<<
of questions. If we find something that we are really interested in,
questions often arise. It is a natural process. I bet your son is observing
a whole lot, and I bet if you share information with him that you think is
interesting, he'll be interested in it too on some level. And observe him.
See what catches his interest. Provide stuff around that. He may not ask you
questions, but that really isn't relevant to his learning.
>>I asked him if there wasI wouldn't ask this question anymore, unless you feel like he does want to
>>something he wanted to learn more about and he said no.<<
learn something but isn't asking it on his own for some reason. Your asking
it is eventually going to make him think that he should be thinking of
something to ask and that just sets up an unnatural, stressful situation.
Jacki
Sandra Dodd
-=-You can learn anything you want but i want you
too want to learn something each day. Boy, that sounds dumb when i
write it down.-=-
Yeah, don't say that.
If you wanted to give him a way to STOP wanting to learn, that might
be the way to go...
Don't say ANYthing about learning. Don't say "you can" or "I wish
you would." Just make your life full and interesting and he will learn.
-=-I think what i'm
expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that.-=-
Haven't you been on this list a while? Do you really expect him to
say "Today I want to learn about bugs"?
-=-I asked him if there was
something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
facilatator(sp).-=-
Don't facilitate school-style learning, and don't wait for him to ask
you.
Don't offer to help him learn, just DO it.
http://sandradodd.com/strewing
http://sandradodd.com/nest
Do it in ways that don't show.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
too want to learn something each day. Boy, that sounds dumb when i
write it down.-=-
Yeah, don't say that.
If you wanted to give him a way to STOP wanting to learn, that might
be the way to go...
Don't say ANYthing about learning. Don't say "you can" or "I wish
you would." Just make your life full and interesting and he will learn.
-=-I think what i'm
expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that.-=-
Haven't you been on this list a while? Do you really expect him to
say "Today I want to learn about bugs"?
-=-I asked him if there was
something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
facilatator(sp).-=-
Don't facilitate school-style learning, and don't wait for him to ask
you.
Don't offer to help him learn, just DO it.
http://sandradodd.com/strewing
http://sandradodd.com/nest
Do it in ways that don't show.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
jenstarc4
>He doesn't really ask alot of questions. I asked him if there wasWhat does he like to do? That's where you should start. I have one
> something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
> that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
> will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
> learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
> facilatator(sp). Hope this makes sense.
> thanks,Heather
>
daughter who didn't/doesn't ask a lot of questions, wasn't/isn't
really obvious in her learning patterns. She quietly intakes
everything around her though, absorbs the world in her own way,
remembers EVERYTHING, and notices everything around her. I think
that is largely because she isn't asking and talking all the time.
I have another daughter who asks and talks all the time, is really
obvious in her learning patterns, and says what she knows and sees.
Both of them are learning all the time without me directing them.
That doesn't mean I'm ignoring them either. I play with them and
talk to them and watch movies with them and go to parks and stores
and drives in the car. We DO things together.
Just because a kid is suddenly "school" age, doesn't mean your life
should change dramatically. Just continue doing stuff together that
you guys like to do. From that you will find his passions and see
the learning happening.
halfshadow1
Haven't you been on this list a while? Do you really expect him to
say "Today I want to learn about bugs"? yup, i should know better.
Some old school stuff snuck back in.I am reading those strewing and
nest pages now.--- In [email protected], Sandra Dodd
<Sandra@...> wrote:
say "Today I want to learn about bugs"? yup, i should know better.
Some old school stuff snuck back in.I am reading those strewing and
nest pages now.--- In [email protected], Sandra Dodd
<Sandra@...> wrote:
>
> -=-You can learn anything you want but i want you
> too want to learn something each day. Boy, that sounds dumb when i
> write it down.-=-
>
> Yeah, don't say that.
> If you wanted to give him a way to STOP wanting to learn, that might
> be the way to go...
>
> Don't say ANYthing about learning. Don't say "you can" or "I wish
> you would." Just make your life full and interesting and he will learn.
>
> -=-I think what i'm
> expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
> learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that.-=-
>
> Haven't you been on this list a while? Do you really expect him to
> say "Today I want to learn about bugs"?
>
> -=-I asked him if there was
> something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
> that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
> will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
> learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
> facilatator(sp).-=-
>
> Don't facilitate school-style learning, and don't wait for him to ask
> you.
> Don't offer to help him learn, just DO it.
>
> http://sandradodd.com/strewing
> http://sandradodd.com/nest
>
> Do it in ways that don't show.
>
> Sandra
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
schuyliz2
You might want to think about what you think learning looks like. It
sounds like you are expecting him to decide that learning is a
formalized experience where he actively chooses to do something with
the end goal of having obtained knowledge from that experience. It
only looks like that when you are in a formalized learning arena.
Wild and free learning does not always garner a skill or a finite
body of knowledge at the end of the day. It is like gathering pieces
to a bunch of different puzzles all the time. So playing with lego
and sitting together with your knees touching and talking about which
color you need to build whatever structure you are building may get
you into a discussion about being a brick layer or a mason or it may
be a conversation about how you want whatever you are building to
look like or about how many thin bricks you need to balance out a
thick brick or maybe just about how the bumps feel under your
fingers. And none of that looks like learning, it just looks like two
people absorbed in a shared activity with a little bit of
conversation occasionally flowing between them. But there are pieces
of a lot of puzzles coming into play in that afternoon. There is a
huge amount of math going on, sorting and fractions and statistics
(if you are looking for a single color among many, how many pieces do
you have to look through to find the one--so distribution as well),
there is social learning, sideways conversations, there is trust
being learnt, the knowledge that a mom is someone who will sit and
sort and play and be just with you--a powerful piece of learning.
There is more that goes on in that moment, in that playful,
concentrating moment, than could possibly be going on if you were to
decide to study just one piece of that puzzle. And it builds on
itself. The knowledge that your son and you gain in a day of playing
and talking and being, it becomes a part of a whole picture of the
world. So, knowing that it takes 4 little bricks to make a whole
brick is a puzzle piece that can be used later when he is thinking
about it taking 4 quarters to make a dollar, maybe. Or seeing the
different distribution of bricks in time and space may be something
that can be applied to sorting a completely different order of things
at some other point. It all matters. It all is a part of knowledge
and thought and awareness and a part who he is and who he is becoming
just as it is a part of you and who you are becoming.
There is nothing that a unit study can give you that curiousity and
exploring can't--well except some sort of certificate of knowledge
transfer, I guess. I have two children who have learned without a
handed down design for, well, the eldest for 10 years now. In the
past week or so Simon (the eldest) has begun to read. He never once
asked to learn to read, he never once approached me with that desire.
He put together all of the tools and pieces to that puzzle in his own
way and in his own time and while the puzzle is in no way complete,
my puzzle is in no way complete, he has come to a point where he can
interpret English as a written word. Both he and his sister have a
relationship with numbers that is so intuitive, is so honest, I could
not have trained them for that. And they both recognize that
knowledge is not something that is handed down, they recognize that
knowledge is something you pick up, it is something that is tasted
and felt and defined by you, by the individual. And that is probably
the most important piece of any puzzle that they can carry.
Schuyler
www.waynforth.blogspot.com
------------------------
Hi,My son turned 6yo. yesterday. So, i guess we are officially
unschoolers now. I wonder if i should do anything different? Sometimes
i want to say to him: You can learn anything you want but i want you
too want to learn something each day. Boy, that sounds dumb when i
write it down. I know he's learning all the time. I think what i'm
expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that. He
doesn't really ask alot of questions. I asked him if there was
something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
facilatator(sp). Hope this makes sense.
sounds like you are expecting him to decide that learning is a
formalized experience where he actively chooses to do something with
the end goal of having obtained knowledge from that experience. It
only looks like that when you are in a formalized learning arena.
Wild and free learning does not always garner a skill or a finite
body of knowledge at the end of the day. It is like gathering pieces
to a bunch of different puzzles all the time. So playing with lego
and sitting together with your knees touching and talking about which
color you need to build whatever structure you are building may get
you into a discussion about being a brick layer or a mason or it may
be a conversation about how you want whatever you are building to
look like or about how many thin bricks you need to balance out a
thick brick or maybe just about how the bumps feel under your
fingers. And none of that looks like learning, it just looks like two
people absorbed in a shared activity with a little bit of
conversation occasionally flowing between them. But there are pieces
of a lot of puzzles coming into play in that afternoon. There is a
huge amount of math going on, sorting and fractions and statistics
(if you are looking for a single color among many, how many pieces do
you have to look through to find the one--so distribution as well),
there is social learning, sideways conversations, there is trust
being learnt, the knowledge that a mom is someone who will sit and
sort and play and be just with you--a powerful piece of learning.
There is more that goes on in that moment, in that playful,
concentrating moment, than could possibly be going on if you were to
decide to study just one piece of that puzzle. And it builds on
itself. The knowledge that your son and you gain in a day of playing
and talking and being, it becomes a part of a whole picture of the
world. So, knowing that it takes 4 little bricks to make a whole
brick is a puzzle piece that can be used later when he is thinking
about it taking 4 quarters to make a dollar, maybe. Or seeing the
different distribution of bricks in time and space may be something
that can be applied to sorting a completely different order of things
at some other point. It all matters. It all is a part of knowledge
and thought and awareness and a part who he is and who he is becoming
just as it is a part of you and who you are becoming.
There is nothing that a unit study can give you that curiousity and
exploring can't--well except some sort of certificate of knowledge
transfer, I guess. I have two children who have learned without a
handed down design for, well, the eldest for 10 years now. In the
past week or so Simon (the eldest) has begun to read. He never once
asked to learn to read, he never once approached me with that desire.
He put together all of the tools and pieces to that puzzle in his own
way and in his own time and while the puzzle is in no way complete,
my puzzle is in no way complete, he has come to a point where he can
interpret English as a written word. Both he and his sister have a
relationship with numbers that is so intuitive, is so honest, I could
not have trained them for that. And they both recognize that
knowledge is not something that is handed down, they recognize that
knowledge is something you pick up, it is something that is tasted
and felt and defined by you, by the individual. And that is probably
the most important piece of any puzzle that they can carry.
Schuyler
www.waynforth.blogspot.com
------------------------
Hi,My son turned 6yo. yesterday. So, i guess we are officially
unschoolers now. I wonder if i should do anything different? Sometimes
i want to say to him: You can learn anything you want but i want you
too want to learn something each day. Boy, that sounds dumb when i
write it down. I know he's learning all the time. I think what i'm
expecting is for him to come up to me and say mom, today i want to
learn to read or i want to learn about bugs and stuff like that. He
doesn't really ask alot of questions. I asked him if there was
something he wanted to learn more about and he said no. I told him
that i am here and i will help him find what he needs to know and i
will always help him. I asked him if there's anything he wants to
learn today and he said no. I think i'm just feeling inactive as a
facilatator(sp). Hope this makes sense.
Sandra Dodd
-=-You might want to think about what you think learning looks like.-=-
This page might help you with remembering what you're looking for:
http://sandradodd.com/seeingit
Here's another tool to use when you're feeling confused. Say things
in the very simplest way so you can really look at what you're
saying. This was written: "it's official/i'm feeling Inactive as
his facilitator"
Rephrase it until you see that what you want is to feel involved as
his mother. Be present with him, quietly and calmly. Look at him
directly. Feel how he's feeling. Do simple things to make things
better.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
This page might help you with remembering what you're looking for:
http://sandradodd.com/seeingit
Here's another tool to use when you're feeling confused. Say things
in the very simplest way so you can really look at what you're
saying. This was written: "it's official/i'm feeling Inactive as
his facilitator"
Rephrase it until you see that what you want is to feel involved as
his mother. Be present with him, quietly and calmly. Look at him
directly. Feel how he's feeling. Do simple things to make things
better.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]