the history and cause of restrictions concerning women
Sandra Dodd
"the history and cause of restrictions concerning women"
THERE is a monumental, international, topic.
I'm willing to ignore most of it (and we have no choice but to ignore
most of it, really, because it's just too big, but some definitely
applies to learning), but for one small aspect, there is the question
of "gossip."
Nancy Wooton wrote the other day on this list:
-=-I think email is, for us 21st century women, the chat with the
neighbor
over the fence while you hung your laundry on the line, or the cup of
coffee my mom always poured in the afternoon for the neighbor from
across the street, or the gathering of women at the stream to beat
clothes on rocks. It's how we connect. We've just expanded the
neighborhood ;-)
-=-Nancy-=-
There has for generations been a great badmouthing of women's
communications, especially by men. Some men have tried to forbid
their wives from hanging out with other women. Some have succeeded.
Some still do.
WHY? Why the big prejudice against women's communications?
It's not valued.
It doesn't make money.
It's "industry"; they're not "being productive."
"Productivity" can be a big sin. Both my grandmothers crocheted me
hideous long vests in the 60's because they saw in some magazine that
teenaged girls somewhere liked them. It wasn't in northern New
Mexico. I threw them away just a couple of months ago, because the
box they had been stuck in for 30 years got mice. And one had
aluminum or light steel decorative hook fasteners (they weren't
rusty, so...)... so it couldn't have been washed anyway.
Women LEARN from other women, from talking about childbirth, cooking,
yardwork, divorce (what to avoid, who's to be trusted), and they get
news of changes in policies and politics, though it won't sound the
way the men talk about it.
I don't want to go into all the gory stories we can all think of
about women being repressed. I want to make the point that unless we
look at it at least a little, we're in danger of repressing our
children the same way.
When Holly gets off MySpace, she *knows* things. She knows who's
getting alone how with whom, in an extended network of friends. She
knows who's moving, coming home, depressed, has a new job, learned a
new Photoshop trick, or some new html programming. She knows who's
got a haircut or new color. I could brand that all worthless and non-
productive, but I'm not going to.
My husband could say that all the time I spend writing e-mails like
this is non-productive and wasteful. Maybe he'd rather I fix those
grey shorts that are in the den and put away the laundry. (Probably!
<g>) But he knows it's not wasteful, and he knows philosophical
discussions are good for people's mental health and growth and
integrity.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
THERE is a monumental, international, topic.
I'm willing to ignore most of it (and we have no choice but to ignore
most of it, really, because it's just too big, but some definitely
applies to learning), but for one small aspect, there is the question
of "gossip."
Nancy Wooton wrote the other day on this list:
-=-I think email is, for us 21st century women, the chat with the
neighbor
over the fence while you hung your laundry on the line, or the cup of
coffee my mom always poured in the afternoon for the neighbor from
across the street, or the gathering of women at the stream to beat
clothes on rocks. It's how we connect. We've just expanded the
neighborhood ;-)
-=-Nancy-=-
There has for generations been a great badmouthing of women's
communications, especially by men. Some men have tried to forbid
their wives from hanging out with other women. Some have succeeded.
Some still do.
WHY? Why the big prejudice against women's communications?
It's not valued.
It doesn't make money.
It's "industry"; they're not "being productive."
"Productivity" can be a big sin. Both my grandmothers crocheted me
hideous long vests in the 60's because they saw in some magazine that
teenaged girls somewhere liked them. It wasn't in northern New
Mexico. I threw them away just a couple of months ago, because the
box they had been stuck in for 30 years got mice. And one had
aluminum or light steel decorative hook fasteners (they weren't
rusty, so...)... so it couldn't have been washed anyway.
Women LEARN from other women, from talking about childbirth, cooking,
yardwork, divorce (what to avoid, who's to be trusted), and they get
news of changes in policies and politics, though it won't sound the
way the men talk about it.
I don't want to go into all the gory stories we can all think of
about women being repressed. I want to make the point that unless we
look at it at least a little, we're in danger of repressing our
children the same way.
When Holly gets off MySpace, she *knows* things. She knows who's
getting alone how with whom, in an extended network of friends. She
knows who's moving, coming home, depressed, has a new job, learned a
new Photoshop trick, or some new html programming. She knows who's
got a haircut or new color. I could brand that all worthless and non-
productive, but I'm not going to.
My husband could say that all the time I spend writing e-mails like
this is non-productive and wasteful. Maybe he'd rather I fix those
grey shorts that are in the den and put away the laundry. (Probably!
<g>) But he knows it's not wasteful, and he knows philosophical
discussions are good for people's mental health and growth and
integrity.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]