plans & goals
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
We met with some unschooler friends to talk about their unschooling
life, and he later said to me that just isn't enough structure for him.
He said something like, "Just living your life and learning things as
they come up, that's great, and I want the kids to do that, but it just
isn't enough. There also needs to be some plan in your mind of where
you want to get, and some measurable goals."
-=-=--
First off, I'd have him define "GOALS"---what are HIS goals for your
children?
Does HE have some plan of where he wants them to "get"---and how would
HE make that happen?
The problem, which he will find <g>, is that there is no way to predict
any of that. The other problem is that *your* and *his* goals may not
be those of your children. What would he do/how would he feel THEN,
when he finds that he's made all these plans towards this goal that
were unnecessary or damaging to his relationship with them?
How many adults feel that they are disappointments to their parents
because they aren't doctors or lawyers?
Every day they live, your childen are learning. Every day, they are
working towards the goal of happiness and towards satisfying needs that
THEY have (not yours).
-=-=-=-=-=-
He also said something that I thought was interesting: "Anytime I've
tried to accomplish something, or see someone else try to accomplish
something, having no plan or goal just does NOT work well. It leads to
sloppiness, and to things you hoped would happen never getting done, or
going in circles with where you want to head, that kind of thing."
-=-=-=-
Exactly WHAT do he think the plan or goals should be?
It is automatically assumed that a child who loves animals should
become a veterinarian. BAD goal---not because it's not a worthy
profession, but because that's the ONLY profession people think of. The
GOAL should be loving more animals, learning to care for them, being
with them. If the child *wants* a profession in veterinary medicine,
great---but there are HUNDREDS of other animal-related careers--just
put on your thinking cap! Plus---maybe the child just simply LOVES
animals---there doesn't have to be a career involved! Just animals to
love.
Your PLAN for that child shouldn't be latin and greek and biology and
chemistry (unless the child likes these things!). It should be
accepting more animals in your home. Making arrangements to visit more
animals. Finding opportunities to BE with animals. Finding more
animal-knowledgable people for that child to hang out with. If that
theads to a career in animals, gret. If it leads to a life filled with
the things that child/adult loves (more animals)---that's even better!
-=-=-=-=
The reason I thought that was interesting was that, in general, I have
found that to be true for me as well. Usually when I approach
something, whether it's the laundry or a career change, I have some
sort of goal or plan - or even steps to follow - in mind.
-=-=-=-
Would you set up a CURRICULUM to get you to that point? Or would you
surround yourself with like-minded people, with the best tools you can
afford, with as many opportunities to try that thing?
It's about IMMERSING your child in his passion---that should be your
plan.
And keep in mind that it could *change* tomorrow. Children can be
fickle! What's fascinating today can be old news tomorrow. Be flexible
and willing to change gears at his whim.
-=-=-=-
So ... I'm wondering how much "intentionality" or "planning" is, or
should be, or could be, involved in unschooling. Surely it's not years
of just wandering aimlessly with no structure, goals, hopes, or plans
of any kind.
-=-=-=-=-
I plan to follow their leads. I intentionally smooth the path in front
of them.
There is nothing "aimless" about what they are interested in at any
given moment. THEY have purpose and goals. Maybe long-term, maybe not.
But *I* am here today wo help them get where they are going TODAY!
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
Email and AIM finally together. You've gotta check out free AOL Mail! -
http://mail.aol.com
From: [email protected]
We met with some unschooler friends to talk about their unschooling
life, and he later said to me that just isn't enough structure for him.
He said something like, "Just living your life and learning things as
they come up, that's great, and I want the kids to do that, but it just
isn't enough. There also needs to be some plan in your mind of where
you want to get, and some measurable goals."
-=-=--
First off, I'd have him define "GOALS"---what are HIS goals for your
children?
Does HE have some plan of where he wants them to "get"---and how would
HE make that happen?
The problem, which he will find <g>, is that there is no way to predict
any of that. The other problem is that *your* and *his* goals may not
be those of your children. What would he do/how would he feel THEN,
when he finds that he's made all these plans towards this goal that
were unnecessary or damaging to his relationship with them?
How many adults feel that they are disappointments to their parents
because they aren't doctors or lawyers?
Every day they live, your childen are learning. Every day, they are
working towards the goal of happiness and towards satisfying needs that
THEY have (not yours).
-=-=-=-=-=-
He also said something that I thought was interesting: "Anytime I've
tried to accomplish something, or see someone else try to accomplish
something, having no plan or goal just does NOT work well. It leads to
sloppiness, and to things you hoped would happen never getting done, or
going in circles with where you want to head, that kind of thing."
-=-=-=-
Exactly WHAT do he think the plan or goals should be?
It is automatically assumed that a child who loves animals should
become a veterinarian. BAD goal---not because it's not a worthy
profession, but because that's the ONLY profession people think of. The
GOAL should be loving more animals, learning to care for them, being
with them. If the child *wants* a profession in veterinary medicine,
great---but there are HUNDREDS of other animal-related careers--just
put on your thinking cap! Plus---maybe the child just simply LOVES
animals---there doesn't have to be a career involved! Just animals to
love.
Your PLAN for that child shouldn't be latin and greek and biology and
chemistry (unless the child likes these things!). It should be
accepting more animals in your home. Making arrangements to visit more
animals. Finding opportunities to BE with animals. Finding more
animal-knowledgable people for that child to hang out with. If that
theads to a career in animals, gret. If it leads to a life filled with
the things that child/adult loves (more animals)---that's even better!
-=-=-=-=
The reason I thought that was interesting was that, in general, I have
found that to be true for me as well. Usually when I approach
something, whether it's the laundry or a career change, I have some
sort of goal or plan - or even steps to follow - in mind.
-=-=-=-
Would you set up a CURRICULUM to get you to that point? Or would you
surround yourself with like-minded people, with the best tools you can
afford, with as many opportunities to try that thing?
It's about IMMERSING your child in his passion---that should be your
plan.
And keep in mind that it could *change* tomorrow. Children can be
fickle! What's fascinating today can be old news tomorrow. Be flexible
and willing to change gears at his whim.
-=-=-=-
So ... I'm wondering how much "intentionality" or "planning" is, or
should be, or could be, involved in unschooling. Surely it's not years
of just wandering aimlessly with no structure, goals, hopes, or plans
of any kind.
-=-=-=-=-
I plan to follow their leads. I intentionally smooth the path in front
of them.
There is nothing "aimless" about what they are interested in at any
given moment. THEY have purpose and goals. Maybe long-term, maybe not.
But *I* am here today wo help them get where they are going TODAY!
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
Email and AIM finally together. You've gotta check out free AOL Mail! -
http://mail.aol.com
harmony
>At a homeschool conference Mary Hood suggested writing out your goals for where you want you children to be when they are 18. If you look at the big picture, you won't worry so much if they aren't reading until they are 8 or if other kids can add and subtract and they can't or whatever. She also suggested "unschooling" (she didn't use this term though) until the kids are about 13. You don't have to worry about what they are learning until then. By that time they are old enough to make plans for their future and decide what they want to do. Then they have 5 years to "fill in any gaps"
> First off, I'd have him define "GOALS"---what are HIS goals for your
> children?
>
> Does HE have some plan of where he wants them to "get"---and how would
> HE make that happen?
If they are "behind" in any subject that they want to learn they have 5 years to learn it before they are an adult. Hopefully by that time they still have an appreciation for learning and continue to grow and learn.
Mary Hoods books are really good. She is not an unschooler, she is a relaxed homeschooler. So some of her thoughts may be different, but her books are wonderful.
Harmony
Anne B
At 08:31 AM 8/27/2007 -0600, you wrote:
What a nice thing to read on NOT back to school day!
Saturday at the kid's soccer game I heard some lady talking to some girl
about school, the girl said her school started Monday (which is today), and
the lady said, oh, you're gonna have FUN! you're gonna have FUN! My first
thought was, how the hell does she know that? I didn't think school was
supposed to be *fun*. I never had *fun* in elementary school, (just the
opposite, I remember a lot of bad things like when I snuck into class and
changed a grade in the teacher's book, and once hiding in a storm drain
because I was scared to go to a summer school class), middle school was a
nightmare, high school I did have fun cutting class, skipping school, or
getting high at lunch. Somehow I don't think that lady had that in
mind. In retrospect maybe she was trying to convince the girl, brain wash
her, to believe that being incarcerated in a government institution would
be fun. What, I wonder, is her definition of fun? This morning I called my
school-age boys over and said, today, you are NOT going to school, and
you're gonna have FUN!!! They grinned.
Anne
mom to Jeffrey 9, Patrick 6, Nicole 4 and Colleen 1
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
What a nice thing to read on NOT back to school day!
Saturday at the kid's soccer game I heard some lady talking to some girl
about school, the girl said her school started Monday (which is today), and
the lady said, oh, you're gonna have FUN! you're gonna have FUN! My first
thought was, how the hell does she know that? I didn't think school was
supposed to be *fun*. I never had *fun* in elementary school, (just the
opposite, I remember a lot of bad things like when I snuck into class and
changed a grade in the teacher's book, and once hiding in a storm drain
because I was scared to go to a summer school class), middle school was a
nightmare, high school I did have fun cutting class, skipping school, or
getting high at lunch. Somehow I don't think that lady had that in
mind. In retrospect maybe she was trying to convince the girl, brain wash
her, to believe that being incarcerated in a government institution would
be fun. What, I wonder, is her definition of fun? This morning I called my
school-age boys over and said, today, you are NOT going to school, and
you're gonna have FUN!!! They grinned.
Anne
> She also suggested "unschooling" (she didn't use this term though)Anne
> until the kids are about 13. You don't have to worry about what they are
> learning until then. By that time they are old enough to make plans for
> their future and decide what they want to do. Then they have 5 years to
> "fill in any gaps"
>If they are "behind" in any subject that they want to learn they have 5
>years to learn it before they are an adult. Hopefully by that time they
>still have an appreciation for learning and continue to grow and learn.
>
>
mom to Jeffrey 9, Patrick 6, Nicole 4 and Colleen 1
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]