Cece

I dont want to.I know it works for so many people but I dont feel our
situation is healthy.We are horrible hermits and dont like being
around people and my 14yo is just like me.I dont want this for him.
I wish they had unschooling counseling to help us do this.
Ive talked to my son and we have gone over our options
1. Correspondence school(American school(very dry and boring dont
think i could make myself do this stuff)
2. Work toward a GED(I personally find these useless but at least he
is doing something)
3. Go to public school for high school
4. Continue to unschool.

But his unschooling consists of getting up at 10:00 and lounging
around the house.Playing computer till 10:00 at night then maybe
reading a book till 1 or 2am.He doesnt want to try anything new.Ive
strewn, Ive suggested.He doesnt like change, he wont try new foods or
different clothes either.I find myself criticising him all to often
lately and dont like it, and know its not helping the situation at
all.He fights with his brother or bosses him around constantly.
He doesnt want to get a job, and doesnt like any of the above options
1 though 3.
I feel lost...What are we supposed to be doing?
BTW he hates sports so dont suggest joining anything like that.
Ive always promised him if hates something he can always quit, Im not
a monster or anything.I would even let him quit highschool if really
hated it...
I worry because my 22yo son still lives at home, works at a
grocerystore without even paid sick days.And has never even been on a
date with a girl...What is going to become of us?

Sandra Dodd

-=-I wish they had unschooling counseling to help us do this.
Ive talked to my son and we have gone over our options-=-

There are people who will talk to you by phone for money, seriously,
if you want that kind of counselling.
(could people here who post some, please? I see things in
homeschooling magazines, but I haven't kept up with them...)

-=-But his unschooling consists of getting up at 10:00 and lounging
around the house.Playing computer till 10:00 at night then maybe
reading a book till 1 or 2am.-=-

How long has he been out of school?
That is the most important information we need to advise you further.


-=-I worry because my 22yo son still lives at home, works at a
grocerystore without even paid sick days.And has never even been on a
date with a girl...-=-

Did the 22 year old go to school?
Would school help the 14 year old in those areas?

Are the boys anything like you or your husband, in temperament?

Sandra



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Nicole Willoughby

could people here who post some, please? I see things in
homeschooling magazines, but I haven't kept up with them.>>>

Jan Hunt
who does the Natural child project
nit sure if she only does younger kids or not but if she cant help Im sure she could refer you to someone

877-593-1547
naturalchild.org/counseling
jan@...




---------------------------------
Sick sense of humor? Visit Yahoo! TV's Comedy with an Edge to see what's on, when.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Pamela Sorooshian

Michelle Barone MA MFT offers in office sessions in Sunland, CA.
See About Michelle for full listing of services.

Phone sessions and online sessions are also available.

Schedule appointments by calling 818 951 7744

Her website is here: <michellebarone.com>

-pam

On Jun 3, 2007, at 4:09 PM, Sandra Dodd wrote:

> (could people here who post some, please? I see things in
> homeschooling magazines, but I haven't kept up with them...)



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Nancy Wooton

On Jun 3, 2007, at 2:26 PM, Cece wrote:

> BTW he hates sports so dont suggest joining anything like that.
> Ive always promised him if hates something he can always quit,

My son plays Pokemon TCG (trading card game) at a league that meets
once a week in a game store. His whole social life revolves around it.
Trust me, it's not sports <g> but it is a lot of fun, mentally
challenging, and it's his own.

Nancy

magenta_mum

--- In [email protected], "Cece" <cece4@...> wrote:
>
> 4. Continue to unschool.

Hi Cece. I'm glad that you're still considering 4. an option, even
though you seem uncomfortable with how things are in your home right now.

I'm something of a collector of quotable quotes, and one that springs
to mind is "search for what you lack in that which you have" (Enrique
Solares(sp?),I think) - though maybe modify it "search for what you
*think/feel* you lack in that which you have".


>
But his unschooling consists of getting up at 10:00 and lounging
around the house. Playing computer till 10:00 at night then maybe
reading a book till 1 or 2am.
>

So the lounging around plays out how? Do you have a bunch of companion
animals, like we do, that are endless sources of joy/fun (and work)?
Is he chatting with you and other family members about this, that and
the other - the book he's currently reading? what all is going on in
his corner of computerland, whether he's a gamer, or a wiki linktrail
follower or whatever it is he's up to/exploring in his computer and
reading time?

Perhaps he spends, and needs to spend a lot of time processing
internally rather than talking about stuff. If so, I can relate. I
need time to stare at the wall or off into space in order to work
through things, though more often I fill this need in me while
standing at the sink washing dishes and gazing out the window at our
back garden or meditatively concentrating on the soapsuds or patterns
on the plates or whatever I'm tending to, which serves the same sort
of purpose for centering myself.

Your post drew my attention particularly because I'm a hermitty type
person by nature. My daughter, K, a 14 yr old only, is a little less
introverted than me, but still happily spends almost all her time at
home, not engaged in or longing for much or any outside activity at
this time in her life - though I should say she did go happily to
school from 5-10.5yrs.

K is not fixed on any particular future either, but has thought some
about part-time paid work she might be interested in doing now, or
soonish, and due to ethical/political issues she has with a lot of the
world at large, came up with the library, gallery or museum, maybe, as
places she thinks/feels she could find comfortable and interesting to
be. I've made preliminary enquiries about working at the library, so
that we know how to go about that - they have young people working in
the back and stacking shelves, etc. This work ideas thing is newish so
haven't got to enquiring at gallery spaces around town yet, nor the
museum.

We are mostly night people at our house right now, and a great deal of
K's time is spent on the computer, reading, listening to music,
watching tv/movies etc. Recently she said "I'd like to learn more
about Napolean". Don;t know where that came from, nor her last
particular interest in something that looks "educational" to those
looking on through the mainstream lens, which was Hitler/WWII... but
around things like that, her interest in media (screen and music,
history included), the time she spends creating pixel and other art
which she has websites for/forums she sometimes participates in, and
something else I meant to say that has gone out of my head right now,
she has fuller days, a fuller, richer life than many looking on would
imagine possible, given how small and close her life might look to some.

We do take a few daytrips out of town each year, and attend a few
specific local homeschool events of interest each year, but we're
certainly not constantly out and about doing things as many people
are. Unschooling looks different in every home.

My point is, again, that I wonder just how empty your 14 yr olds days
really are when you take a closer look. Possibly it's up to you to
take a closer look/interest in what all he is doing with his time. You
might be surprised what you see there, which might help you relax
some, to be more in the moment, more about *now*.

Well, that's a lot, and others have asked questions that your answers
to will no doubt help people help you.

Kind regards
Jo R

Meredith

--- In [email protected], "Cece" <cece4@...> wrote:
>He doesnt want to try anything new.Ive
> strewn, Ive suggested.He doesnt like change, he wont try new foods
or
> different clothes either. I find myself criticising him all to
often
> lately and dont like it, and know its not helping the situation at
> all.

Not only is it not helping, there's a good chance its part of what's
*creating* the situation. It's hard to be self motivated when
someone in your house keeps riding you about your lack of
motivation.

Start taking what he *is* doing more seriously. What is he reading?
What's he doing on the computer? Which games does he like? What does
he like about them? Does he go to other sites to research cheat
codes etc? Is he doing other searching and questioning online? Its
possible he's doing so many *different* things on the computer that
he doesn't need to experiment with clothing or food, he needs that
part of his life to be stable so he has a firm base for his
explorations.

> I worry because my 22yo...

Stop and take a deep breath. Your younger son is not a carbon copy
of the older, he is a different person. They may have a lot of
similarities, but they are not the same - if nothing else, one has a
22yo older brother and the other has a 14yo younger brother ;) Work
on seeing each of them as individuals, with individual needs and
goals and feelings.

---Meredith (Mo 5.5, Ray 13)

Cece

--- In [email protected], Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...> wrote:
>

>
> There are people who will talk to you by phone for money,
seriously,
> if you want that kind of counselling.
> (could people here who post some, please? I see things in
> homeschooling magazines, but I haven't kept up with them...)

Probably not feasable money is tight.Just wishing outloud.
>
>
> How long has he been out of school?
> That is the most important information we need to advise you
further.
>
He has never been to school at all.We homeschooled till about 3rd
grade then have been unschooling since(with the occasional mom
breakdown that included a month of doing book work here and there).
>
> Did the 22 year old go to school?

I just wonder if he had gone to highschool if he wouldnt be better
off.He "homeschooled most his life with unschooling starting at about
16yrs.He just doesnt seem like he knows what to do with himself
either.He has been working since he was 9yrs old too.

> Would school help the 14 year old in those areas?

Thats what I am wondering.If he goes to school maybe he will make a
friend or get a girlfriend or find some direction.Cause he sure isnt
finding any of the above here at home.Am I expecting too much?Are all
boys so lost at these ages?


> Are the boys anything like you or your husband, in temperament?
Thats a hard one.Im very socially inept.A private person and dont
like people to know alot about me.But at the same time I would love a
friend but just cant seem to find one either.Maybe that is how my
14yo is to a point.My hubby is better with people but not big on
socializing either.He is however self motivated and it frustrates him
that certain kids are so unmotivated.He likes the idea of unschooling
as well but its been a hard year, he had a heart attack last year and
a slew of other health problems so he hasnt been able to help me with
the kids much at all(like playing with them or going places or
whatever)..



Ive been discussing this more with my son and hubby.We really are
trying to find a solution here that we all are happy with.My hubby
doesnt like the idea of public school(he had bad experiences there)
But I NEED to believe that if he(14yo) decides to continue on his
narrow path that this is the right thing and healthy (mentally)for
him..


>
> Sandra
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>

Cece

Meredith I do take what he does seriously.I even started his book
series because he wanted me to read them.Its just its been so many
years of doing the same things.I keep expecting him to start
broadening his horizens.Get knew experiences, that sort of thing.
Plus I wonder if this is the best thing for him socially.I guess I
dont want him to end up like me either...


--- In [email protected], "Meredith" <meredith@...>
wrote:
>
> --- In [email protected], "Cece" <cece4@> wrote:
> >He doesnt want to try anything new.Ive
> > strewn, Ive suggested.He doesnt like change, he wont try new
foods
> or
> > different clothes either. I find myself criticising him all to
> often
> > lately and dont like it, and know its not helping the situation
at
> > all.
>
> Not only is it not helping, there's a good chance its part of
what's
> *creating* the situation. It's hard to be self motivated when
> someone in your house keeps riding you about your lack of
> motivation.
>
> Start taking what he *is* doing more seriously. What is he reading?
> What's he doing on the computer? Which games does he like? What
does
> he like about them? Does he go to other sites to research cheat
> codes etc? Is he doing other searching and questioning online? Its
> possible he's doing so many *different* things on the computer that
> he doesn't need to experiment with clothing or food, he needs that
> part of his life to be stable so he has a firm base for his
> explorations.
>
> > I worry because my 22yo...
>
> Stop and take a deep breath. Your younger son is not a carbon copy
> of the older, he is a different person. They may have a lot of
> similarities, but they are not the same - if nothing else, one has
a
> 22yo older brother and the other has a 14yo younger brother ;) Work
> on seeing each of them as individuals, with individual needs and
> goals and feelings.
>
> ---Meredith (Mo 5.5, Ray 13)
>

Pamela Sorooshian

On Jun 4, 2007, at 9:41 AM, Meredith wrote:

> Start taking what he *is* doing more seriously.


This is SO often the key! I don't think it can be emphasized enough.
And it applies at all ages. No matter HOW trivial what they are doing
seems to be, to a parent, take it seriously. If a kid is spending
many hours a day watching soap operas, take it seriously. Start
watching together - subscribe to Soap Opera Digest. Bring up the
characters in your conversations. Bring up the situations and compare
them to real situations happening in the world to real people. And,
notice what it is that seems interesting about the soaps, to your
kid. Is it relaxing? Is it exciting? Is it the relationships or the
drama or the tragedy that is attractive? What is holding his/her
interest?

I picked soaps because most parents would probably think their kid
was wasting his/her time if he watched soaps for hours and hours
every day. But, replace "soap operas" with anything else - whatever a
kid might be spending their time on.

"Attention must be paid." (from Death of a Salesman)

An unschooling parent needs to be fully present with their kids,
sensitive to their kids' needs, and extremely respectful of their
kids' interests. This is simple and very difficult, at the same time.
It is so simple, it really asks so little of us, as parents, to pay
attention to what "is" right in front of us. But, it is very very
difficult to do, sometimes, especially when what our kids are
presenting to us appears to us to be negative or dull or unproductive.

I work at it, still, myself, sometimes. My 16 and 19 year olds have
been playing The SIMS for hours and hours, every day for a week.
They've been up until 3 or 4 in the morning playing and slept until 1
or 2 in the afternoon. This is hard for me - I have a little urge
inside myself to try to get them to do something more productive.
Having been down this road many times before, though, I stifled that
urge in myself and purposely thought supportive thoughts (they are
having so much fun with this, they are having fun TOGETHER and
enjoying a lot of hours of side-by-side play, a lot like when they
were little). And then, suddenly, a moment of clarity struck me - my
older daughter left last week for Alaska - she'll be gone for 3 or 4
months and most likely will not ever really live at home again. My
other girls' response has been to nestle down in the house and play
together - play something that involves creating and controlling
families' lives (The SIMS). DUH!

So - I got serious about supporting their play time - just by doing
little things like helping them find a missing disk and bringing them
some food and giving them a little kiss as I walked by, etc. MY
realization is what changed - not their behavior - but it changed the
entire feeling of our home - in a flash!

Next thing I knew, Rosie was writing a screenplay (NaNoWriMo is
sponsoring a screenplay writing month) and she's using the SIMS to
develop the characters and putting them into some kind of storyboard
software that Roxana found for her.

The kid who was upset that his mom put his straw in his milk box?
Paying more attention might show a series of situations like this one
- he probably is reacting to being treated just like the other kids -
it probably felt sort of like being part of an assembly-line. It
would probably help to single him out more, in advance, and
constantly ask him things like, "I'm putting the straws in for the
little ones, do you want to do yours, yourself?" Take every
opportunity to treat him as different and special.

My point is that you don't have to have the insight in advance. You
don't always have to have the knowledge of what the kid is going
through, what need they are trying to fill. You won't always know.
But if you pay close attention and take on face value what they're
showing you, and take it seriously whether or not you understand it,
you'll often get more insight, sometimes only after-the-fact.

In the post about the kid being upset about mom putting his straw in
his milk box for him, it was implied that his reason for "wigging
out" was trivial. I think it was supposed to indicate to us that the
kid is having meltdowns over such little things.

Instead of considering these little things, consider that they are
important and significant enough for a child to be really upset by
it, enough to disrupt an otherwise fun outing. This is not a trivial
matter, this is a matter that is serious to this child and, if it is
important to the child than mom ought to take it very seriously, as
well.

As we get older and our kids grow up, we eventually come to realize
that all the big things in our lives are really the direct result of
how we've handled all the little things.

When people have several young children, they can often get into a
sort of mass production, assembly line, mode of operation. In a mall,
mom can be focused on getting food into the hands of each of the
kids, for example, while making sure none of them are wandering away.
Easy to not be aware of how one of the kids might be not comfortable
with the assembly-line approach until the kid explodes over some
seemingly trivial thing like mom sticking his straw in his milk
carton for him.

Take more time to pay more attention. "Sweat the small stuff." <G>
Slow down a lot. Time the extra minutes to check whether or not each
kid is comfortable in the car. Check whether each kid is getting the
food they really want. Check - "Do you want a straw? Want me to put
it in?" Take the time to focus on little things like this and the big
things will be good, too. Kids will learn to be more patient with
each other, to take care of each other, to pay attention to how
others are feeling, etc. Look into their eyes now, check in with how
they're doing, support what is important to them. Life with these
kids, when they are teens, will be pleasant and comfortable.

For the parent of the 14 year old - all the exact same advice! Figure
out how you might apply it to your situation. Don't worry that the
stakes seem higher - let that go. You still have years!

-pam

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Sandra Dodd

-=-As we get older and our kids grow up, we eventually come to realize
that all the big things in our lives are really the direct result of
how we've handled all the little things.-=-

That just needed to be repeated. I'll find a place to put it
longterm, too. Pam Sorooshian wrote it.

-=-Look into their eyes now, check in with how
they're doing, support what is important to them. Life with these
kids, when they are teens, will be pleasant and comfortable.-=-

This has been true in our family.
It's another of those unexpected benefits about unschooling that
surprised me. A pleasant surprise.

All my kids can drive now.
All my kids have had jobs and money.

I see them being responsible and careful and considerate and it's
nothing I could have "taught" them or created through my own effort,
but I gave them room to grow, and nurtured them, and kept them safe
and happy.

I have trees in my yard that we put in as little seedlings, and some
are taller than the house, in ten years for the biggest ones (Western
catalpas that came up in a friend's yard and we transplanted (and
four years for the honey locusts) which I grew from seed and are not
house-tall, but taller than I am). I don't know how those trees grow
their branches and leaves. I didn't make those trees. I watered
them and kept them safe and they are becoming the trees they had the
potential to become.

Those who were once my children are becoming the adults they had the
potential to become.

I could have messed those trees up, or pulled them up by the roots,
or let them shrivel from lack of water.
I could have messed those kids up, filled them full of "no" or make
them mean and unhappy.

I made other choices, and the results are good.

Sandra

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Sandra Dodd

-=-We homeschooled till about 3rd
grade then have been unschooling since(with the occasional mom
breakdown that included a month of doing book work here and there).-=-

If that happens very often, or if it has happened recently, it's
possible that you (and he) never really deschooled to the point that
unschooling could take hold and thrive.

Sandra

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Jacqueline Parks

On 6/4/07, Cece <cece4@...> wrote:

> Plus I wonder if this is the best thing for him socially.I guess I
> dont want him to end up like me either...


*****
I am a very introverted person. I attended public school for grades K-12.
I definitely didn't fit in, and I felt horrible about it. I was made to
feel that there was something wrong with me because I didn't have a lot of
friends. I didn't really have any close friends, but I think I would have
been fine with it if the authorities and other students hadn't labelled it
odd.

I have five children, and two of them are very introverted. There is an
obvious difference between them and me. They are so self-confident. They
don't think that there is anything wrong with themselves. They don't think
they need friends, or that they should stay in relationships or social
situations where they are not having fun. They live their lives doing
things they like, spending time the way they want.

I think that the foundation of our differences is that my children were
never told that they needed to make friends.

Going to public school did not make me more outgoing, it just made me less
accepting of myself. I am who I am.

I am so glad that my children have had a different kind of life. They have
been loved and supported and allowed to be who they are. They are not more
outgoing because of unschooling either, but they are happier, and that is
what matters.

~Jacqueline


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Nancy Machaj

=-I keep expecting him to start
broadening his horizens.Get knew experiences, that sort of thing.
Plus I wonder if this is the best thing for him socially.I guess I
dont want him to end up like me either...=-

Is it unrealistic to expect him to do things that you arent modeling?
Do you have interests that you pursue? Do you have hobbies or
passions? Do you discuss them with your kids?

What kinds of things are you involved in?

Even if your kids are introverted and shy about new things, you are
projecting your own feelings (negative) about yourself onto them. If
its their choice, they may be fine with their lives, and isnt that
the point?

Some thoughts,
Nancy


*****
blogging at:
http://happychildhood.homeschooljournal.net




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Cally Brown

This is so true....
> Stop and take a deep breath. Your younger son is not a carbon copy
> of the older, he is a different person. They may have a lot of
> similarities, but they are not the same - if nothing else, one has a
> 22yo older brother and the other has a 14yo younger brother ;) Work
> on seeing each of them as individuals, with individual needs and
> goals and feelings.
>
My oldest son did stuff that wasn't good. He left home at 17 in anger
and did more stuff that wasn't good. Mostly, I suspect because of the
disrespectful way I had raised him! I kept expecting my second son to do
similar things, until one day he said to me - well, shouted, to get my
attention over the top of my rantings - " I'm NOT him! I'm different! If
I do do wrong things they'll be my own wrong things! I'm not him!" and
that was the real start of me learning to be a better mother. I thanked
him, and asked him to remind me whenever he felt I needed to be reminded
of that again - and he did.

Each of my sons is special and wonderful and sometimes awful in his own
way. I love them to bits - and since I became a more respectful mother,
honoring their individuality, life has been so much better for all of us
- and I am closer to my eldest now at 26 (him not me hehe) than since he
was a baby :-)

cally

Dawn

This has been an incredible thread for me so thank you Jacquie for
being so open and honest and thank you everyone for the feedback...
One of Zak's passions is Pokemon and being on the computer and
inside I'm using feeling gripped with the feeling of "oh he SHOULD
be doing something else that's teaching him something" Just that
thought alone stopped me and made me realize how much he is
learning. We talked a lot about Pokemon last night and I was
astonished at how many websites he'd been on and found out things
about the creators of Pokemon, how and when it started, all the
cards and games on line and in boxes, where all the tournaments are
in the country and on and on and on.... I'd just smiled when he
talked about this stuff in the past and never really realized how
much he knew. He asked me if we could go to Japan where Pokemon
comes from... My response was if you want to go there then I'm going
to need to know where, how much it would cost, where would we stay,
and lots of other questions... He said "I'm getting right onto that
and finding out the info"... Before the end of the evening he'd
already been to several websites for travel information and then
found out that neither he, his brother or dad have passports (I have
both British and American that are current)... He's searching the
British Embassy site as I write to find out about what he needs for
his British passport (born in USA, but because of me can have a
British passport)... Next is his USA passport... He asked me for a
file this morning so that he could start making a file for all the
information he's gathering for this trip we are all going to take to
Japan.... This has been a wonderful, illuminating experience... so
again Jacque thank you from the bottom of my heart for expanding
what was already going on in my house and looking at something from
a different perspective.

Namaste

Dawn
Tucson, AZ
Zak 11 and Max 7

--- In [email protected], Sandra Dodd <Sandra@...>
wrote:
>
> -=-As we get older and our kids grow up, we eventually come to
realize
> that all the big things in our lives are really the direct result
of
> how we've handled all the little things.-=-
>
> That just needed to be repeated. I'll find a place to put it
> longterm, too. Pam Sorooshian wrote it.
>
> -=-Look into their eyes now, check in with how
> they're doing, support what is important to them. Life with these
> kids, when they are teens, will be pleasant and comfortable.-=-
>
> This has been true in our family.
> It's another of those unexpected benefits about unschooling that
> surprised me. A pleasant surprise.
>
> All my kids can drive now.
> All my kids have had jobs and money.
>
> I see them being responsible and careful and considerate and it's
> nothing I could have "taught" them or created through my own
effort,
> but I gave them room to grow, and nurtured them, and kept them
safe
> and happy.
>
> I have trees in my yard that we put in as little seedlings, and
some
> are taller than the house, in ten years for the biggest ones
(Western
> catalpas that came up in a friend's yard and we transplanted (and
> four years for the honey locusts) which I grew from seed and are
not
> house-tall, but taller than I am). I don't know how those trees
grow
> their branches and leaves. I didn't make those trees. I watered
> them and kept them safe and they are becoming the trees they had
the
> potential to become.
>
> Those who were once my children are becoming the adults they had
the
> potential to become.
>
> I could have messed those trees up, or pulled them up by the
roots,
> or let them shrivel from lack of water.
> I could have messed those kids up, filled them full of "no" or
make
> them mean and unhappy.
>
> I made other choices, and the results are good.
>
> Sandra
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>

Cece

This board is fast.My network cable shorted out and couldnt get on
for a few days.Anyway I cant reply to everyone here but I do
appreciate the replies.Thank you.

I think that perhaps I overreacted.I was feeling very low when I
wrote this.I reread some Holt articles and feel better again.The
problem is with me not my son.He is happy and so is my 6yo.So I guess
I just freak out every now and again.I have no support other then my
hubby and its hard to live in such a small community where the
schools and education are such a focal point.I over heard a comment
by someone the other day that really killed me.Someone said that
homeschooled kids were all wierd and couldnt socialize properly.They
were commenting on someone elses shy homeschooled kid.My 6yo is very
outgoing so I know that socialization is not as key as genetics.Some
kids are social and some arent.
Is anyone else as wishy washy as me.I love unschooling I just feel
that we dont do enough.As in we dont go enough places, have enough
experiences so the kids will find thier bliss...They cant find it if
they dont know its out there..









--- In [email protected], "Cece" <cece4@...> wrote:
>
> I dont want to.I know it works for so many people but I dont feel
our
> situation is healthy.We are horrible hermits and dont like being
> around people and my 14yo is just like me.I dont want this for him.
> I wish they had unschooling counseling to help us do this.
> Ive talked to my son and we have gone over our options
> 1. Correspondence school(American school(very dry and boring dont
> think i could make myself do this stuff)
> 2. Work toward a GED(I personally find these useless but at least
he
> is doing something)
> 3. Go to public school for high school
> 4. Continue to unschool.
>
> But his unschooling consists of getting up at 10:00 and lounging
> around the house.Playing computer till 10:00 at night then maybe
> reading a book till 1 or 2am.He doesnt want to try anything new.Ive
> strewn, Ive suggested.He doesnt like change, he wont try new foods
or
> different clothes either.I find myself criticising him all to often
> lately and dont like it, and know its not helping the situation at
> all.He fights with his brother or bosses him around constantly.
> He doesnt want to get a job, and doesnt like any of the above
options
> 1 though 3.
> I feel lost...What are we supposed to be doing?
> BTW he hates sports so dont suggest joining anything like that.
> Ive always promised him if hates something he can always quit, Im
not
> a monster or anything.I would even let him quit highschool if
really
> hated it...
> I worry because my 22yo son still lives at home, works at a
> grocerystore without even paid sick days.And has never even been on
a
> date with a girl...What is going to become of us?
>

tracy

Hi~
Check out my website and see if you think I could help.
www.transformingfamily.com
I work mostly with unschooling families :-)
Thanks~
Tracy





--- In [email protected], Nicole Willoughby
<cncnawilloughby@...> wrote:
>
> could people here who post some, please? I see things in
> homeschooling magazines, but I haven't kept up with them.>>>
>
> Jan Hunt
> who does the Natural child project
> nit sure if she only does younger kids or not but if she cant
help Im sure she could refer you to someone
>
> 877-593-1547
> naturalchild.org/counseling
> jan@...
>
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
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>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>