Hi-new here and ? about reading
bigmamma.bigmamma
I have been unschooling my 3 kids for the last couple of years and have
a question/worry about my 10 year old son who is not yet reading. I
have never been on one of these groups, but I have read alot of sandras
stuff and joyce fetterol(spelling wrong sorry)
I am in a period of worrying and my husband is putting presure on the
situation.
I have tried many things, he get easily frustrated. I think he just
learns differently than most kids and I do believe he will figure it
out. He too can get upset about it, because he's friends read or he
wishes he could read through his video games.Him being upset about it
is the main reason I'm looking for suggestions. Of course I have talked
with him about different ways we could go about learning and sometimes
he thinks one of the ideas sounds good and will try, but quits because
of frustration. Thanks for any suggestions. Lyn
a question/worry about my 10 year old son who is not yet reading. I
have never been on one of these groups, but I have read alot of sandras
stuff and joyce fetterol(spelling wrong sorry)
I am in a period of worrying and my husband is putting presure on the
situation.
I have tried many things, he get easily frustrated. I think he just
learns differently than most kids and I do believe he will figure it
out. He too can get upset about it, because he's friends read or he
wishes he could read through his video games.Him being upset about it
is the main reason I'm looking for suggestions. Of course I have talked
with him about different ways we could go about learning and sometimes
he thinks one of the ideas sounds good and will try, but quits because
of frustration. Thanks for any suggestions. Lyn
Schuyler
My 10 year old son, Simon, isn't reading yet. A couple of days ago he
gathered up all the Asterix and Obelix comic books we have and put them in
his sleeping bag so that he could read through them with a flashlight. He
worked through some of the words and looked at the pictures and sang some of
the words when the Gauls had a moment of drunken revelry. When he was 5 I
can remember reading books with him and pointing out words in text for him
to read. When we read Noddy books I'd have him find the words Big Ears as we
read through. It didn't make a difference. Even the little dot-to-dots I
used to do so that he could trace out the letters, it didn't make a
difference. His reading is going at his own pace. As is his writing. I don't
think there is anything that I could have done to push his reading on. And I
certainly don't think that the tricks I was doing when he was 5 did anything
but make him more reticent to explore reading.
I've spent some time looking at the literacy statistics to underscore the
lie that schooling can bring children to reading. Here is a table of
proficiency across grade levels and years (from 1992 to 2005) that really
shows how literacy isn't something that schooling can give your child:
http://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/2006/section2/table.asp?tableID=560 And the
interesting thing is that betwen 4th and 12th grade the movement between
proficiency levels is very slight, and certainly by 8th grade, in school, if
you aren't reading, you aren't going to read. But I bet there are instances
on this list of people whose children might not have been reading by 13, but
by not being excluded or shamed or made to feel like a failure, a permanent
non-reader, they are reading by 15 or 16 or 17.
In my own case relaxing about it made the biggest difference. I can't make
Simon read. Having Linnaea read at 6 really demonstrated to me that it
wasn't necessarily an environmental issue, its more likely a developmental
issue. I can't change his development. I can only support him by reading to
him, by helping him to live in a world filled with text and words. There are
things that amaze me about him not reading. He remembers things like none of
the readers in our family do. He sees things in video games that those of us
relying on text don't seem to, or at least that take us a lot longer to get
to. His story telling is amazing. His narrative structure is very developed.
He helps me to negotiate a world that isn't made up of text.
I would relax. I would support your son in his reading. I would help your
husband to see how successfully he is negotiating the world, and how reading
will come. I would help him to get through the video games that require
reading. Simon is amazingly confident in his not reading. He will ask
friends and adults and his younger sister to read for him without even a
moments embarrassment. I was woried when Linnaea began to read that it would
make Simon feel uncomfortable, or stupid. My fears were so misplaced. He is
incredible.
Schuyler
www.waynforth.blogspot.com
gathered up all the Asterix and Obelix comic books we have and put them in
his sleeping bag so that he could read through them with a flashlight. He
worked through some of the words and looked at the pictures and sang some of
the words when the Gauls had a moment of drunken revelry. When he was 5 I
can remember reading books with him and pointing out words in text for him
to read. When we read Noddy books I'd have him find the words Big Ears as we
read through. It didn't make a difference. Even the little dot-to-dots I
used to do so that he could trace out the letters, it didn't make a
difference. His reading is going at his own pace. As is his writing. I don't
think there is anything that I could have done to push his reading on. And I
certainly don't think that the tricks I was doing when he was 5 did anything
but make him more reticent to explore reading.
I've spent some time looking at the literacy statistics to underscore the
lie that schooling can bring children to reading. Here is a table of
proficiency across grade levels and years (from 1992 to 2005) that really
shows how literacy isn't something that schooling can give your child:
http://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/2006/section2/table.asp?tableID=560 And the
interesting thing is that betwen 4th and 12th grade the movement between
proficiency levels is very slight, and certainly by 8th grade, in school, if
you aren't reading, you aren't going to read. But I bet there are instances
on this list of people whose children might not have been reading by 13, but
by not being excluded or shamed or made to feel like a failure, a permanent
non-reader, they are reading by 15 or 16 or 17.
In my own case relaxing about it made the biggest difference. I can't make
Simon read. Having Linnaea read at 6 really demonstrated to me that it
wasn't necessarily an environmental issue, its more likely a developmental
issue. I can't change his development. I can only support him by reading to
him, by helping him to live in a world filled with text and words. There are
things that amaze me about him not reading. He remembers things like none of
the readers in our family do. He sees things in video games that those of us
relying on text don't seem to, or at least that take us a lot longer to get
to. His story telling is amazing. His narrative structure is very developed.
He helps me to negotiate a world that isn't made up of text.
I would relax. I would support your son in his reading. I would help your
husband to see how successfully he is negotiating the world, and how reading
will come. I would help him to get through the video games that require
reading. Simon is amazingly confident in his not reading. He will ask
friends and adults and his younger sister to read for him without even a
moments embarrassment. I was woried when Linnaea began to read that it would
make Simon feel uncomfortable, or stupid. My fears were so misplaced. He is
incredible.
Schuyler
www.waynforth.blogspot.com
----- Original Message -----
From: "bigmamma.bigmamma" <bigmamma.bigmamma@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Sunday, May 27, 2007 10:59 PM
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Hi-new here and ? about reading
>I have been unschooling my 3 kids for the last couple of years and have
> a question/worry about my 10 year old son who is not yet reading. I
> have never been on one of these groups, but I have read alot of sandras
> stuff and joyce fetterol(spelling wrong sorry)
> I am in a period of worrying and my husband is putting presure on the
> situation.
> I have tried many things, he get easily frustrated. I think he just
> learns differently than most kids and I do believe he will figure it
> out. He too can get upset about it, because he's friends read or he
> wishes he could read through his video games.Him being upset about it
> is the main reason I'm looking for suggestions. Of course I have talked
> with him about different ways we could go about learning and sometimes
> he thinks one of the ideas sounds good and will try, but quits because
> of frustration. Thanks for any suggestions. Lyn
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
Fetteroll
On May 27, 2007, at 5:59 PM, bigmamma.bigmamma wrote:
when he's biologically and developmentally ready to. It's like trying
to teach a 9 mo old to walk. You can try. And at 12 mos when he gets
up and walk you can even believe the walking lessons worked. But it's
just biology maturing that made him able.
Teachers can believe they teach kids to read. They're providing an
environment -- not a particularly great one, but it does have books
and words. Kids mature and they do learn to read when they're able
and it seems like the teacher caused it. But *lots* of kids because
of the pressure to do something that they aren't ready for decide
they hate reading.
Reading happens when it happens, usually between 6 and 12, as long as
the experience with the printed word is a pleasant one.
frustrating. But then the next summer they get on and in a few
minutes are riding fine. It's amazing how easy development can make
something!
But *you* need to believe that it's development that allows decoding,
not lessons. As long as you keep holding onto the idea that there's
some program that will get him reading, he's going to be even more
frustrated.
Sandra has a pretty extensive collection of writings on reading later.
http://sandradodd.com/reading
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> I think he justIn this way he learns exactly as everyone else: he'll figure it out
> learns differently than most kids and I do believe he will figure it
> out.
when he's biologically and developmentally ready to. It's like trying
to teach a 9 mo old to walk. You can try. And at 12 mos when he gets
up and walk you can even believe the walking lessons worked. But it's
just biology maturing that made him able.
Teachers can believe they teach kids to read. They're providing an
environment -- not a particularly great one, but it does have books
and words. Kids mature and they do learn to read when they're able
and it seems like the teacher caused it. But *lots* of kids because
of the pressure to do something that they aren't ready for decide
they hate reading.
Reading happens when it happens, usually between 6 and 12, as long as
the experience with the printed word is a pleasant one.
> Him being upset about itKids can struggle to ride a bike before they're ready. It *is*
> is the main reason I'm looking for suggestions
frustrating. But then the next summer they get on and in a few
minutes are riding fine. It's amazing how easy development can make
something!
But *you* need to believe that it's development that allows decoding,
not lessons. As long as you keep holding onto the idea that there's
some program that will get him reading, he's going to be even more
frustrated.
Sandra has a pretty extensive collection of writings on reading later.
http://sandradodd.com/reading
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Paula Sjogerman
On May 28, 2007, at 6:25 AM, Schuyler wrote:
sister!)
However, at some point, this part wasn't:
It was a hard time. But everything still held true, he wasn't ready,
so I kept reassuring him that it would happen. And it did, at about
11. Having come through the other side, I would still emphatically
say that even though he went through that period of feeling bad, he
is still better off. He OWNS his reading and he loves to read,
neither of which would be true if he had been in school or forced to
try to read in our home.
Paula
> In my own case relaxing about it made the biggest difference. IThis was also exactly true in our house (down to the 6 yr old reading
> can't make
> Simon read. Having Linnaea read at 6 really demonstrated to me that it
> wasn't necessarily an environmental issue, its more likely a
> developmental
> issue. I can't change his development. I can only support him by
> reading to
> him, by helping him to live in a world filled with text and words.
> There are
> things that amaze me about him not reading. He remembers things
> like none of
> the readers in our family do. He sees things in video games that
> those of us
> relying on text don't seem to, or at least that take us a lot
> longer to get
> to. His story telling is amazing. His narrative structure is very
> developed.
> He helps me to negotiate a world that isn't made up of text.
sister!)
However, at some point, this part wasn't:
>Around 10, he became uncomfortable and embarrassed about not reading.
> Simon is amazingly confident in his not reading. He will ask
> friends and adults and his younger sister to read for him without
> even a
> moments embarrassment. I was woried when Linnaea began to read that
> it would
> make Simon feel uncomfortable, or stupid.
>
It was a hard time. But everything still held true, he wasn't ready,
so I kept reassuring him that it would happen. And it did, at about
11. Having come through the other side, I would still emphatically
say that even though he went through that period of feeling bad, he
is still better off. He OWNS his reading and he loves to read,
neither of which would be true if he had been in school or forced to
try to read in our home.
Paula
bigmamma.bigmamma
thanks for the support, i'll relax and enjoy the natural flow of
unschooling!lyn
--- In [email protected], Paula Sjogerman <sjogy@...>
wrote:
unschooling!lyn
--- In [email protected], Paula Sjogerman <sjogy@...>
wrote:
>that it
>
> On May 28, 2007, at 6:25 AM, Schuyler wrote:
>
> > In my own case relaxing about it made the biggest difference. I
> > can't make
> > Simon read. Having Linnaea read at 6 really demonstrated to me
> > wasn't necessarily an environmental issue, its more likely awords.
> > developmental
> > issue. I can't change his development. I can only support him by
> > reading to
> > him, by helping him to live in a world filled with text and
> > There arevery
> > things that amaze me about him not reading. He remembers things
> > like none of
> > the readers in our family do. He sees things in video games that
> > those of us
> > relying on text don't seem to, or at least that take us a lot
> > longer to get
> > to. His story telling is amazing. His narrative structure is
> > developed.reading
> > He helps me to negotiate a world that isn't made up of text.
>
> This was also exactly true in our house (down to the 6 yr old
> sister!)without
>
> However, at some point, this part wasn't:
> >
> > Simon is amazingly confident in his not reading. He will ask
> > friends and adults and his younger sister to read for him
> > even athat
> > moments embarrassment. I was woried when Linnaea began to read
> > it wouldreading.
> > make Simon feel uncomfortable, or stupid.
> >
>
>
> Around 10, he became uncomfortable and embarrassed about not
> It was a hard time. But everything still held true, he wasn'tready,
> so I kept reassuring him that it would happen. And it did, atabout
> 11. Having come through the other side, I would still emphaticallyhe
> say that even though he went through that period of feeling bad,
> is still better off. He OWNS his reading and he loves to read,to
> neither of which would be true if he had been in school or forced
> try to read in our home.
>
> Paula
>
Sandra Dodd
-=-I have tried many things, he get easily frustrated.-=-
There's a funny line on The Simpson's. Ned Flander's parents were
beatniks. They went to a child psychologist or some such, about
their little boy Ned. The dad says something like "We've tried
nothing, and nothing works!"
Beautiful ambiguity. <g>
But "nothing" can't work if you're trying many things.
Unschooling can't work in the presence of many methods and
experiments. It only starts to work at some point after all other
methods are abandoned and one begins to trust that the learning can
and will happen WHEN the parents stop trying to teach.
-=-. Of course I have talked
with him about different ways we could go about learning -=-
There are not different ways "we" could go about learning.
You know how to read, and he will learn to read HIS way, not
different ways.
Stop trying to frustrate him, by stop trying to teach him to read.
But on the other hand there are games you could play. One might be
to list something from the video games (the characters, or the areas,
or something) and see if he can tell the words apart, like a multiple
choice. If you list (I'm thinking Harvest Moon, which Holly started
playing before she could read) things like
chicken
horse
cow
sheep
moles
dog
cat
fish
bird
goat
duck
and say "can you see which one is "dog"?
They don't need to look at all the letters, just either maybe the
beginning or the end (whatever the kid knows, if anything).
I wouldn't go through the whole list.
And you might put a picture by each one.
We did have some little cheat sheets for video games, on index cards,
with the names of things and a picture of them. I remember a little
list for Treasure Mountain (an old computer game) that had a picture
of a tree and a pinecone and such, with the words next to them.
There are other things between "can read" and "can't read." There's
mom reading to the kid non-judgmentally, helping just as you might
help a bi-lingual friend who couldn't read English fluently yet, or a
blind friend, or a friend who wasn't wearing her contacts and just
needed something read to her, like a menu. Skim and read what they
need, not every single word. Paraphrase. Ask if they need help.
Treating children like adult friends has gotten me through many
moments when I was tempted to go with an old "rule" or habit or
default action.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
There's a funny line on The Simpson's. Ned Flander's parents were
beatniks. They went to a child psychologist or some such, about
their little boy Ned. The dad says something like "We've tried
nothing, and nothing works!"
Beautiful ambiguity. <g>
But "nothing" can't work if you're trying many things.
Unschooling can't work in the presence of many methods and
experiments. It only starts to work at some point after all other
methods are abandoned and one begins to trust that the learning can
and will happen WHEN the parents stop trying to teach.
-=-. Of course I have talked
with him about different ways we could go about learning -=-
There are not different ways "we" could go about learning.
You know how to read, and he will learn to read HIS way, not
different ways.
Stop trying to frustrate him, by stop trying to teach him to read.
But on the other hand there are games you could play. One might be
to list something from the video games (the characters, or the areas,
or something) and see if he can tell the words apart, like a multiple
choice. If you list (I'm thinking Harvest Moon, which Holly started
playing before she could read) things like
chicken
horse
cow
sheep
moles
dog
cat
fish
bird
goat
duck
and say "can you see which one is "dog"?
They don't need to look at all the letters, just either maybe the
beginning or the end (whatever the kid knows, if anything).
I wouldn't go through the whole list.
And you might put a picture by each one.
We did have some little cheat sheets for video games, on index cards,
with the names of things and a picture of them. I remember a little
list for Treasure Mountain (an old computer game) that had a picture
of a tree and a pinecone and such, with the words next to them.
There are other things between "can read" and "can't read." There's
mom reading to the kid non-judgmentally, helping just as you might
help a bi-lingual friend who couldn't read English fluently yet, or a
blind friend, or a friend who wasn't wearing her contacts and just
needed something read to her, like a menu. Skim and read what they
need, not every single word. Paraphrase. Ask if they need help.
Treating children like adult friends has gotten me through many
moments when I was tempted to go with an old "rule" or habit or
default action.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
-=-Around 10, he became uncomfortable and embarrassed about not reading.
It was a hard time. But everything still held true, he wasn't ready,
so I kept reassuring him that it would happen. And it did, at about
11. -=-
It was that way here with Holly.
I expected her to read earlier than the boys had, because she was a
girl, and statistically/generally, girls read earlier. Holly wasn't
contributing to those statistics, but that's okay. She reads fine now.
She doesn't skim well yet. She's 15. She can read top to bottom of
anything, just fine, but to glance over a menu quickly is scary for
her. She can read a whole menu, but doesn't have the "skip this
section" skills she will have someday.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
It was a hard time. But everything still held true, he wasn't ready,
so I kept reassuring him that it would happen. And it did, at about
11. -=-
It was that way here with Holly.
I expected her to read earlier than the boys had, because she was a
girl, and statistically/generally, girls read earlier. Holly wasn't
contributing to those statistics, but that's okay. She reads fine now.
She doesn't skim well yet. She's 15. She can read top to bottom of
anything, just fine, but to glance over a menu quickly is scary for
her. She can read a whole menu, but doesn't have the "skip this
section" skills she will have someday.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
jenstarc4
I have been unschooling my 3 kids for the last couple of years and have
12. Now she reads great, types faster than me and her spelling is
awesome!
When she was really little and we first started homeschooling, I tried
doing the phonics thing. That lasted about 2 or 3 days before I
dropped it. She never ever got phonics. The concept evaded her. It
was like describing the color "red" to someone who has never been able
to see. Now that she can read, she understands phonics a little
better. She is a whole word learner and it took her all those years to
gather enough words in her store of knowledge before she had enough to
read strings of them together in the form of sentences.
frustrated help him. Help him not get into situations that frustrate
him so much. Read to him, always answer his request to read something
for him. Listen to books on tape or cd. I really can't stress that
enough! Chamille devoured books in that form, so that by the time she
was reading, she knew those words existed, she knew how sentences and
ideas strung together. Her knowledge of grammar is very good, her
sense of descriptions and ideas is great!
He too can get upset about it, because he's friends read or he
anything was the fact that book for book she had read more books on
tape and cd and me reading to her, than most of her school aged peers.
Let your son know that reading will come, assure him and help him feel
whole and perfect just the way he is. I remember telling Chamille many
times that she DID know how to read, she just was still in the learning
process of gathering words. It helped to point out all the words that
she could read.
Write him little notes. I went through the bathroom and made cute
little signs for everything in there and stuck them to the objects.
For a long time she saw those words every time she went into the
bathroom. I stickered everything with words, toilet, bathtub, mirror,
drawer, toothbursh, etc. I did that because I knew she knew what those
things were and that she was a whole word learner, gathering words into
her storage bank. It helped her gather words faster. She hardly ever
asked more than once how to spell or read a word. Once she knew it,
she knew it.
Seriously do EVERYthing in your power to eliminate frustration. Don't
make it frustrating by trying to get him to do something that his brain
is already trying to do. Find the way to help him in his own natural
process.
> a question/worry about my 10 year old son who is not yet reading. > Iam in a period of worrying and my husband is putting presure on the
> situation.My oldest dd, now 13, didn't start reading well until she was about
12. Now she reads great, types faster than me and her spelling is
awesome!
When she was really little and we first started homeschooling, I tried
doing the phonics thing. That lasted about 2 or 3 days before I
dropped it. She never ever got phonics. The concept evaded her. It
was like describing the color "red" to someone who has never been able
to see. Now that she can read, she understands phonics a little
better. She is a whole word learner and it took her all those years to
gather enough words in her store of knowledge before she had enough to
read strings of them together in the form of sentences.
> I have tried many things, he get easily frustrated. I think he justFrom our experience, you are right about that! If he is getting
> learns differently than most kids and I do believe he will figure it
> out.
frustrated help him. Help him not get into situations that frustrate
him so much. Read to him, always answer his request to read something
for him. Listen to books on tape or cd. I really can't stress that
enough! Chamille devoured books in that form, so that by the time she
was reading, she knew those words existed, she knew how sentences and
ideas strung together. Her knowledge of grammar is very good, her
sense of descriptions and ideas is great!
He too can get upset about it, because he's friends read or he
> wishes he could read through his video games.Him being upset about ittalked
> is the main reason I'm looking for suggestions. Of course I have
> with him about different ways we could go about learning andsometimes
> he thinks one of the ideas sounds good and will try, but quitsbecause
> of frustration. Thanks for any suggestions. LynChamille used to get frustrated too. What helped her more than
anything was the fact that book for book she had read more books on
tape and cd and me reading to her, than most of her school aged peers.
Let your son know that reading will come, assure him and help him feel
whole and perfect just the way he is. I remember telling Chamille many
times that she DID know how to read, she just was still in the learning
process of gathering words. It helped to point out all the words that
she could read.
Write him little notes. I went through the bathroom and made cute
little signs for everything in there and stuck them to the objects.
For a long time she saw those words every time she went into the
bathroom. I stickered everything with words, toilet, bathtub, mirror,
drawer, toothbursh, etc. I did that because I knew she knew what those
things were and that she was a whole word learner, gathering words into
her storage bank. It helped her gather words faster. She hardly ever
asked more than once how to spell or read a word. Once she knew it,
she knew it.
Seriously do EVERYthing in your power to eliminate frustration. Don't
make it frustrating by trying to get him to do something that his brain
is already trying to do. Find the way to help him in his own natural
process.
Sandra Dodd
-=-What helped her more than
anything was the fact that book for book she had read more books on
tape and cd and me reading to her, than most of her school aged
peers. -=-
One thing that helped Holly, though it was very sad, was learning
that some of her friends who had claimed (or pretended) to be reading
were just bullshitting.
She and another friend both had rats, and they both owned copies of
the same book about having pet rats. When Holly learned to read, she
saw that the things the other friend had said were in the book
weren't in there at all. One was kind of the opposite. <g>
While I was a little amused, I was also really sad about it, because
Holly thought much less of the girls after that.
When "reading ability" is graded or rewarded extrinsically, kids will
lie about it (or cheat in other ways). When reading is wholly and
purely for the purpose of getting information off a page, it's a
whole different thing.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
anything was the fact that book for book she had read more books on
tape and cd and me reading to her, than most of her school aged
peers. -=-
One thing that helped Holly, though it was very sad, was learning
that some of her friends who had claimed (or pretended) to be reading
were just bullshitting.
She and another friend both had rats, and they both owned copies of
the same book about having pet rats. When Holly learned to read, she
saw that the things the other friend had said were in the book
weren't in there at all. One was kind of the opposite. <g>
While I was a little amused, I was also really sad about it, because
Holly thought much less of the girls after that.
When "reading ability" is graded or rewarded extrinsically, kids will
lie about it (or cheat in other ways). When reading is wholly and
purely for the purpose of getting information off a page, it's a
whole different thing.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Pam Tellew
<<<<<I remember telling Chamille many
times that she DID know how to read, she just was still in the learning
process of gathering words. It helped to point out all the words that
she could read.>>>>
Thanks Jen for that! In all the years I've read these lists, I've
never seen it put quite that way. That's what my oldest has been
doing these last few years. I wish I'd thought of or heard this
expression, "gathering words," years ago. It would have helped me
with waiting. There are so many stories out there of the 'overnight
"late" reader' that, when it's clear it's not happening that way,
it's easy to get worried. Sandra, I hope you'll put this in your
reading section of your web site. I think it's an important idea!
Pam
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
times that she DID know how to read, she just was still in the learning
process of gathering words. It helped to point out all the words that
she could read.>>>>
Thanks Jen for that! In all the years I've read these lists, I've
never seen it put quite that way. That's what my oldest has been
doing these last few years. I wish I'd thought of or heard this
expression, "gathering words," years ago. It would have helped me
with waiting. There are so many stories out there of the 'overnight
"late" reader' that, when it's clear it's not happening that way,
it's easy to get worried. Sandra, I hope you'll put this in your
reading section of your web site. I think it's an important idea!
Pam
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Joanna Murphy
I have to concur--thanks for this post! My dd has been a little frustrated on and off that
she's not reading yet--it's not coming at all from us, but she is getting messages from
other kids she meets who are in school, and from the fact that her best friend (unschooler,
same age) is starting to read.
Last night after reading this post I had a conversation with her and put forth the idea that
she is gathering words and in that vein would she like me to start labeling things around
the house to help her gather more. She got really excited about it and immediately came
up with a game to play where I give her the words on cards and she can take them to
where they belong in the house.
I could tell she regained a sense of control and confidence about the process that has
been lacking. I think I was contributing to the lack of confidence by being a little stuck
with my schooled mind. I didn't want to "teach," which is what she was asking for but I
knew she didn't really want, but didn't know what else to do, so I did nothing. That wasn't
right either in this situation, because she was aksing me to be more actively present for
her. (She is usually pretty clear about when she wants help and when she doesn't.)
This post helped to free up a little creative thought for me and opened a new paradigm for
her. I've been saying to her that she really is learning to read, as she is reading more and
more words, but she knows that she isn't ready to string them all together yet, so in her
mind she is just not reading. When I presented the new way of looking at it, I think she
suddenly saw herself on a continuum that leads to proficient reading, whearas before it
was an either/or.
Thank you Jen. Joanna
she's not reading yet--it's not coming at all from us, but she is getting messages from
other kids she meets who are in school, and from the fact that her best friend (unschooler,
same age) is starting to read.
Last night after reading this post I had a conversation with her and put forth the idea that
she is gathering words and in that vein would she like me to start labeling things around
the house to help her gather more. She got really excited about it and immediately came
up with a game to play where I give her the words on cards and she can take them to
where they belong in the house.
I could tell she regained a sense of control and confidence about the process that has
been lacking. I think I was contributing to the lack of confidence by being a little stuck
with my schooled mind. I didn't want to "teach," which is what she was asking for but I
knew she didn't really want, but didn't know what else to do, so I did nothing. That wasn't
right either in this situation, because she was aksing me to be more actively present for
her. (She is usually pretty clear about when she wants help and when she doesn't.)
This post helped to free up a little creative thought for me and opened a new paradigm for
her. I've been saying to her that she really is learning to read, as she is reading more and
more words, but she knows that she isn't ready to string them all together yet, so in her
mind she is just not reading. When I presented the new way of looking at it, I think she
suddenly saw herself on a continuum that leads to proficient reading, whearas before it
was an either/or.
Thank you Jen. Joanna
--- In [email protected], Pam Tellew <pamtellew@...> wrote:
>
> <<<<<I remember telling Chamille many
> times that she DID know how to read, she just was still in the learning
> process of gathering words. It helped to point out all the words that
> she could read.>>>>
>
> Thanks Jen for that! In all the years I've read these lists, I've
> never seen it put quite that way. That's what my oldest has been
> doing these last few years. I wish I'd thought of or heard this
> expression, "gathering words," years ago. It would have helped me
> with waiting. There are so many stories out there of the 'overnight
> "late" reader' that, when it's clear it's not happening that way,
> it's easy to get worried. Sandra, I hope you'll put this in your
> reading section of your web site. I think it's an important idea!
> Pam
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>