[AlwaysLearning] Re: Don't know if I have the courage, but I'm beginning to think I
Heather Smithson
Thanks for your reply. The advice about checking out people's experiences with children just a bit older than mine - I needed that! :-) --- On Sun 08/27, plaidpanties666 < plaidpanties666@... > wrote:
From: plaidpanties666 [mailto: plaidpanties666@...]To: [email protected]: Sun, 27 Aug 2006 21:22:12 -0000Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Re: Don't know if I have the courage, but I'm beginning to think I "get it"
--- In [email protected], "kgmomgo" wrote:>> I'm interested in unschooling, but don't know if I'll have the > courage to stick with it.I don't know that you need courage to "stick with it" so much as to get started. Its scary stepping away from the standard family paradigm. Its unnerving to Trust when all your background is screaming "just say NO!" even when you can see the way to "Yes." Its frustrating to have to rethink and reframe and reexamine all the time until it starts to feel natural. Once it does start to feel natural "sticking with" unschooling isn't like being in love at all. Its like living with someone who is important to you. Standard parenting expects children to become less important to parents and vice versa. If you have a 3yr old you've been getting some of those messages already - messages about "separation" and all the "personal time" you'll "get back" once your kid goes to preschool.From that perspective, spending so much time
together seems weird - like a twenty year love affair. To 'get' unschooling takes an entirely *different* perspective about people living together as families. Its a perspective that you only get *after* you've started unschooling - which is why starting can be sooooo scary. One of the things I found most helpful when I was just getting into unschooling was to hear the stories of people with kids just a little older than mine. It was exciting to read about teens, but still really abstract b/c I wasn't living with a teen, I was living with a 3yr old. Hearing the stories of people with 5 yr olds gave me the "courage" to get over all the "what ifs" and "yes, buts" that come up in the beginning. ---Meredith
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From: plaidpanties666 [mailto: plaidpanties666@...]To: [email protected]: Sun, 27 Aug 2006 21:22:12 -0000Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Re: Don't know if I have the courage, but I'm beginning to think I "get it"
--- In [email protected], "kgmomgo" wrote:>> I'm interested in unschooling, but don't know if I'll have the > courage to stick with it.I don't know that you need courage to "stick with it" so much as to get started. Its scary stepping away from the standard family paradigm. Its unnerving to Trust when all your background is screaming "just say NO!" even when you can see the way to "Yes." Its frustrating to have to rethink and reframe and reexamine all the time until it starts to feel natural. Once it does start to feel natural "sticking with" unschooling isn't like being in love at all. Its like living with someone who is important to you. Standard parenting expects children to become less important to parents and vice versa. If you have a 3yr old you've been getting some of those messages already - messages about "separation" and all the "personal time" you'll "get back" once your kid goes to preschool.From that perspective, spending so much time
together seems weird - like a twenty year love affair. To 'get' unschooling takes an entirely *different* perspective about people living together as families. Its a perspective that you only get *after* you've started unschooling - which is why starting can be sooooo scary. One of the things I found most helpful when I was just getting into unschooling was to hear the stories of people with kids just a little older than mine. It was exciting to read about teens, but still really abstract b/c I wasn't living with a teen, I was living with a 3yr old. Hearing the stories of people with 5 yr olds gave me the "courage" to get over all the "what ifs" and "yes, buts" that come up in the beginning. ---Meredith
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Heather Smithson
Thanks for the list of links :-)
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Heather Smithson
You both seem to understand what I was trying to say, and used clearer language than my sleep-deprived brain is capable of right now. :-) --- On Sat 08/26, Gold Standard < jacki@... > wrote:
From: Gold Standard [mailto: jacki@...]To: [email protected]: Sat, 26 Aug 2006 17:27:04 -0700Subject: RE: [AlwaysLearning] Don't know if I have the courage, but I'm beginning to think I "get it"
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From: Gold Standard [mailto: jacki@...]To: [email protected]: Sat, 26 Aug 2006 17:27:04 -0700Subject: RE: [AlwaysLearning] Don't know if I have the courage, but I'm beginning to think I "get it"
>>I don't think loving children is particular to unschoolers, though I>>think it's easier to love children who are near and familiar and not>>furious with the parents.<<And to add to this thought, it's easier to love parents who are near and notfurious with the children :o)Jacki_______________________________________________
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