Interesting observation about clinginess
freepsgal
We've talked about my dd8's clinginess but I've noticed something in
the past few days that sheds a new light on things. My ds9 is now
doing more of that as well. His way of being affectionate is to
come up to my husband and I and bump his head against our bodies.
He hasn't really hugged us since he was a preschooler. But lately
he's spending time sitting in my lap, throwing his arms around my
neck, and even telling me he loves me! It's awesome! Last night, I
was laying in bed (dealing with a bad back) and the two of them were
snuggled up on either side of me as we watched tv together. I can't
even remember the last time we were that close as a group.
As I fell asleep last night, I pondered the changes we've made in
our home and also our awesome discussions. I think perhaps my son
feels freedom in expressing boredom (which he's been doing while
he's being affectionate) because he now understands I'm not going to
try to cure his boredom by suggesting schoolwork. He's also
venturing out with verbal remarks that I thought would take longer
to see. For example, yesterday since I was stuck in the bed all
day, I suggested we read a chapter or two in our current read-
aloud. He reluctantly admitted he wasn't in the mood to listen to
me read aloud and I realized he was afraid I'd insist. Instead, I
just laughed and hugged him and told him I appreciated him being
honest and that if he did feel like having me read aloud later, to
just let me know. How simple it was to have a joyful moment, when
in the past that situation would have been the beginning of a power
struggle. So I then did a remarkable thing, remarkable for me at
least, and suggested to the kids that if they didn't have an
interest in hearing the rest of the story at a later time, to please
let me know so I could just finish the book alone. I assured them
it was perfectly okay to not be interested as no one likes every
single book they read. Yet they both insisted I not read alone but
to wait until they were ready to join me. I would have been happy
either way. So I found a different book to read and they played.
And even though I was stuck in the bed, we still had a great day. :)
Beth M.
the past few days that sheds a new light on things. My ds9 is now
doing more of that as well. His way of being affectionate is to
come up to my husband and I and bump his head against our bodies.
He hasn't really hugged us since he was a preschooler. But lately
he's spending time sitting in my lap, throwing his arms around my
neck, and even telling me he loves me! It's awesome! Last night, I
was laying in bed (dealing with a bad back) and the two of them were
snuggled up on either side of me as we watched tv together. I can't
even remember the last time we were that close as a group.
As I fell asleep last night, I pondered the changes we've made in
our home and also our awesome discussions. I think perhaps my son
feels freedom in expressing boredom (which he's been doing while
he's being affectionate) because he now understands I'm not going to
try to cure his boredom by suggesting schoolwork. He's also
venturing out with verbal remarks that I thought would take longer
to see. For example, yesterday since I was stuck in the bed all
day, I suggested we read a chapter or two in our current read-
aloud. He reluctantly admitted he wasn't in the mood to listen to
me read aloud and I realized he was afraid I'd insist. Instead, I
just laughed and hugged him and told him I appreciated him being
honest and that if he did feel like having me read aloud later, to
just let me know. How simple it was to have a joyful moment, when
in the past that situation would have been the beginning of a power
struggle. So I then did a remarkable thing, remarkable for me at
least, and suggested to the kids that if they didn't have an
interest in hearing the rest of the story at a later time, to please
let me know so I could just finish the book alone. I assured them
it was perfectly okay to not be interested as no one likes every
single book they read. Yet they both insisted I not read alone but
to wait until they were ready to join me. I would have been happy
either way. So I found a different book to read and they played.
And even though I was stuck in the bed, we still had a great day. :)
Beth M.
Sandra Dodd
On Apr 18, 2006, at 5:50 AM, freepsgal wrote:
Sorry about your back pain. Glad your kids are happy.
Sandra
> How simple it was to have a joyful moment, whenVery nice.
> in the past that situation would have been the beginning of a power
> struggle.
Sorry about your back pain. Glad your kids are happy.
Sandra
Kim H
<My ds9 is now
doing more of that as well. His way of being affectionate is to
come up to my husband and I and bump his head against our bodies.
He hasn't really hugged us since he was a preschooler. But lately
he's spending time sitting in my lap, throwing his arms around my
neck, and even telling me he loves me! It's awesome!>
Hi Beth,
Isn't this just beautiful! I'm so pleased for you and your children that you can all experience this lovely stuff together.
Kim
doing more of that as well. His way of being affectionate is to
come up to my husband and I and bump his head against our bodies.
He hasn't really hugged us since he was a preschooler. But lately
he's spending time sitting in my lap, throwing his arms around my
neck, and even telling me he loves me! It's awesome!>
Hi Beth,
Isn't this just beautiful! I'm so pleased for you and your children that you can all experience this lovely stuff together.
Kim
----- Original Message -----
From: freepsgal
To: [email protected]
Sent: Tuesday, April 18, 2006 9:50 PM
Subject: [AlwaysLearning] Interesting observation about clinginess
We've talked about my dd8's clinginess but I've noticed something in
the past few days that sheds a new light on things. My ds9 is now
doing more of that as well. His way of being affectionate is to
come up to my husband and I and bump his head against our bodies.
He hasn't really hugged us since he was a preschooler. But lately
he's spending time sitting in my lap, throwing his arms around my
neck, and even telling me he loves me! It's awesome! Last night, I
was laying in bed (dealing with a bad back) and the two of them were
snuggled up on either side of me as we watched tv together. I can't
even remember the last time we were that close as a group.
As I fell asleep last night, I pondered the changes we've made in
our home and also our awesome discussions. I think perhaps my son
feels freedom in expressing boredom (which he's been doing while
he's being affectionate) because he now understands I'm not going to
try to cure his boredom by suggesting schoolwork. He's also
venturing out with verbal remarks that I thought would take longer
to see. For example, yesterday since I was stuck in the bed all
day, I suggested we read a chapter or two in our current read-
aloud. He reluctantly admitted he wasn't in the mood to listen to
me read aloud and I realized he was afraid I'd insist. Instead, I
just laughed and hugged him and told him I appreciated him being
honest and that if he did feel like having me read aloud later, to
just let me know. How simple it was to have a joyful moment, when
in the past that situation would have been the beginning of a power
struggle. So I then did a remarkable thing, remarkable for me at
least, and suggested to the kids that if they didn't have an
interest in hearing the rest of the story at a later time, to please
let me know so I could just finish the book alone. I assured them
it was perfectly okay to not be interested as no one likes every
single book they read. Yet they both insisted I not read alone but
to wait until they were ready to join me. I would have been happy
either way. So I found a different book to read and they played.
And even though I was stuck in the bed, we still had a great day. :)
Beth M.
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