Christy Putnam

My dh has taken a step towards figuring out this whole step-dad thing (been
together 3 years) and trying to understand unschooling (we just started this
year) checked out some books at the library. I cant remember all the titles
but I know two are about step parenting/being a step father and one is the
Unschooling Handbook. So far he hasn't read a single word but at least he
has taken the step of checking them out! Yay DAD!

Anyway, seeing the step-parenting books made me wonder what parenting
approach they are. One says positive discipline..."Positive Discipline for
Blended Families" by Jane Nelsen, Cheryl Erwin and Stephen Glenn. The
other, addressed to teens, is called "Stepliving for Teens" by Joel D. Block
and Susan S. Bartell. I have very little time to read and am in process of
trying to read my own unschooling literature so I am writing to see what I
can find out from you all. Does anyone know anything about these books or
the authors? Can anyone recommend any books that would be
unschooly/suitable for a step-father of an 11 year old boy (whole family new
to unschooling)?

Thanks in advance for your help!

In Gratitude,

Christy Putnam
Unschooling Mom to Aden (1) and Seth (11)
Loving wife of Chet (ann. 7/4/04)

<http://blog.myspace.com/personal_balance>
http://blog.myspace.com/personal_balance

"Go confidently in the direction of your
dreams. Live the life you have always
imagined." - Henry David Thoreau



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

tuckervill

It's not about being a step-parent, but it's my favorite parenting
book. Living Joyfully with Children by Win and Bill Sweet. Easy
readm but packed full of wisdom Written by grandparents, not PhD's.
(Well, they may be PhD's in something, but they're not using it as
expertise for the book.)

That book replaced my former favorite, which was "How to talk so
kids will listen..." which is still available.

The important thing for a step-dad to remember is that everything he
does might be taken wrong, until he really, really gains the child's
trust, and he's proven that he's reasonable and approachable. This
takes years, in most cases He should never discipline your son, or
complain in front of your son that you don't discipline him. When
my husband and I were first married, he tried to make my middle son
sit and eat his whole dinner. Since Jon didn't seem too distressed,
I let it go (I wasn't an unschooler then, either). As soon as my dh
saw fit to let him up from the table, Jon threw up in the trash
can. My husband to this day learns from that example, even though
that was over 16 years ago and Jon is 21.

Your husband might also consider you might be right when you say
it's different when it's your own. It would be nice if step-dads
and moms could actually feel for their stepchildren the way they do
about their own children. But if they don't have any biological
children, they probably can't recognize the depth of feeling. It's
not something you can explain.

Yeah, get those books. They'll be quite helpful.

Karen, in for a peek


--- In [email protected], "Christy Putnam"
<personal_balance@...> wrote:
>
> My dh has taken a step towards figuring out this whole step-dad
thing (been
> together 3 years) and trying to understand unschooling (we just
started this
> year) checked out some books at the library. I cant remember all
the titles
> but I know two are about step parenting/being a step father and
one is the
> Unschooling Handbook. So far he hasn't read a single word but at
least he
> has taken the step of checking them out! Yay DAD!
>
> Anyway, seeing the step-parenting books made me wonder what
parenting
> approach they are. One says positive discipline..."Positive
Discipline for
> Blended Families" by Jane Nelsen, Cheryl Erwin and Stephen Glenn.
The
> other, addressed to teens, is called "Stepliving for Teens" by
Joel D. Block
> and Susan S. Bartell. I have very little time to read and am in
process of
> trying to read my own unschooling literature so I am writing to
see what I
> can find out from you all. Does anyone know anything about these
books or
> the authors? Can anyone recommend any books that would be
> unschooly/suitable for a step-father of an 11 year old boy (whole
family new
> to unschooling)?
>
> Thanks in advance for your help!
>
> In Gratitude,
>
> Christy Putnam
> Unschooling Mom to Aden (1) and Seth (11)
> Loving wife of Chet (ann. 7/4/04)
>
> <http://blog.myspace.com/personal_balance>
> http://blog.myspace.com/personal_balance
>
> "Go confidently in the direction of your
> dreams. Live the life you have always
> imagined." - Henry David Thoreau
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>