Grame Family

Hi! I'm not sure how much help I can be to you and your husband but
when I read the below my gut reaction was why not? Why does he have
to work at a job he doesn't like to do? Why does he keep doing it?
If he doesn't like paying the bills then why cant he think of ways to
eliminate them or at least conserve so they are not as high.

I know I'm not very good at thinking like the norm. But why does a
child need to stick anything out. I love this with my own husband.
Sometimes he says one of the kids should stick something out to, it's
ingrained in our society. With him it's about money. I spent the
money for that "class, sport etc" you should stick it out. On the
other hand I always convince him there is more harm in sticking it
out then good. The joy on my sons face when he is not made to
continue with something he knows in his mind and body is just not
feeling right is wonderful! What would the world be like if children
were given the freedom to explore what feels right to them and then
to do what feels good. Think of all those grumpy people in rush hour
traffic who are unhappy and hate their jobs and lives for that matter
but stick with it because that is all they have been taught? Ok Rant
over.

Now why can't Kianne come home since she is the one who wants to.
Just one child to start with. It is possible to show your husband
the joy in Kianne's face daily by having that freedom and if it is
the two of you think of all the wonderful "projects" she could come
up with to do together. Ask her, what do you want to find out more
about, what do you love to do? Sit down with her, draft up a plan.
Ex: Oh you like knitting, lets take a class together, help her
explore everything about it, how the needles are made, how to make
your own, how to figure out the patterns with different yarn because
you love that yarn (there's a math challenge for ya!@) What animals
do the yarn come from and I don't mean oh sheep. I mean what breeds
are best, how do your raise the sheep? There is a life lesson. I
know several women who have followed their love of knitting and now
run yarn stores, own their own flock of sheep and these skills were
never taught in a classroom. Have Kianne show the plan to dad and
see what he thinks, maybe he can add things to it. He may feel more
comfortable knowing there is some type of plan not just that your
going to sit home all day and watch tv. (Although, I believe sitting
at home all day watching tv can be great research too!)

It is totally possible that Holly seeing how fun and happy Kianne
is will follow suit and want to come home to. Although with her you
may need to try harder to find those opportunities for her to play
with her friends on a almost daily basis and to find new friends who
she can be social with during the day. Some people just need to have
that in their lives and that is something that needs to be respected
also.

I know you would like to bring them all home, and I am an all or
nothing kind of person so I totally relate to it, but sometimes going
slower is better for the other people (maybe your husband?) in our
lives.

Raven
Mama to Tristan 8, Kess 6 and Wynn 3
http://scatterville.blogspot.com

On Mar 20, 2006, at 6:59 PM, [email protected] wrote:

> My husband doesn't "get" or agree with unschooling at all. He is
> saying right now to we need to make Kianne stick it out in school,
> she can't just quit. You can't quit things just because you don't
> like them. He went off on a rant saying " I don't like having to
> work, but I do it, I don't just quit; I don't like paying the
> bills, but I can't just quit" Good grief!!



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