Unschooling through crisis
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I am one of those who have been in and out of this list for years, sometimes
feverishly reading all the messages, and other times not being able to find
two minutes to turn on the computer. Once again, I am seriously needing life
advice from all you experienced and wise people.
A little background: Unschooling was a rapid and happy evolutionary journey
for us, but fate had some challenges in store for our family. We weathered
through an earthquake that damaged our home, a fire, a burglary, a stroke,
cancer, a car accident, bankruptcy, and two grandparents and my brother's deaths.
Other than one year around preliminary divorce proceedings, the kids have
never been in school. However, now, years later, I am crumbling under the
responsibilities of being a single, working, unschooling mom. I am exhausted, my
health is tenuous, my finances nonexistent, and the sparkle/hope is fading from
my kids eyes. We have a great relationship, filled with much love and respect,
but are struggling under the burdens of sadness and fear. For the past four
years, their dad has been disabled, with brain damage and addiction to
prescription meds, after another serious car accident. I have just been told that the
property where the kids and I live, is slated to be sold, and that we must
relocate in April. I swear, I am not exaggerating all this. Kinda overwhelmed.
I have no intention of abandoning our unschooling philosophy, but I am trying
to figure out, along with my kids, how to adapt our lives yet again. I have
little time, energy or money to be the creative positive guiding influence that
I have always striven to be. The kids do not want to attend a large public
school, but we haven't found a small, progressive one either. They don't quite
know what to do with themselves while I am away at work, errands, medical
appointments and therapy for sixty hours a week. Other than one personal friend
who is a registered child and family therapist, we have not been able to find a
therapist for teens who supports home or unschooling. So there is the
framework for all my questions:
Are their any articles or archived discussions about unschooling as a single
and/or working parent?
Has anyone found a supportive therapist that won't report unschoolers for
neglect?
If due to financial or medical necessity, you became less available to your
unschooled children, what would you do?
I feel very self indulgent even posting this, but I am trembling to face the
days ahead.
Bright blessings and gratitude to you all,
Bird
feverishly reading all the messages, and other times not being able to find
two minutes to turn on the computer. Once again, I am seriously needing life
advice from all you experienced and wise people.
A little background: Unschooling was a rapid and happy evolutionary journey
for us, but fate had some challenges in store for our family. We weathered
through an earthquake that damaged our home, a fire, a burglary, a stroke,
cancer, a car accident, bankruptcy, and two grandparents and my brother's deaths.
Other than one year around preliminary divorce proceedings, the kids have
never been in school. However, now, years later, I am crumbling under the
responsibilities of being a single, working, unschooling mom. I am exhausted, my
health is tenuous, my finances nonexistent, and the sparkle/hope is fading from
my kids eyes. We have a great relationship, filled with much love and respect,
but are struggling under the burdens of sadness and fear. For the past four
years, their dad has been disabled, with brain damage and addiction to
prescription meds, after another serious car accident. I have just been told that the
property where the kids and I live, is slated to be sold, and that we must
relocate in April. I swear, I am not exaggerating all this. Kinda overwhelmed.
I have no intention of abandoning our unschooling philosophy, but I am trying
to figure out, along with my kids, how to adapt our lives yet again. I have
little time, energy or money to be the creative positive guiding influence that
I have always striven to be. The kids do not want to attend a large public
school, but we haven't found a small, progressive one either. They don't quite
know what to do with themselves while I am away at work, errands, medical
appointments and therapy for sixty hours a week. Other than one personal friend
who is a registered child and family therapist, we have not been able to find a
therapist for teens who supports home or unschooling. So there is the
framework for all my questions:
Are their any articles or archived discussions about unschooling as a single
and/or working parent?
Has anyone found a supportive therapist that won't report unschoolers for
neglect?
If due to financial or medical necessity, you became less available to your
unschooled children, what would you do?
I feel very self indulgent even posting this, but I am trembling to face the
days ahead.
Bright blessings and gratitude to you all,
Bird
Sandra Dodd
On Mar 13, 2006, at 12:50 PM, robinstempo@... wrote:
do.
There is someone who does long-distance counselling, and who might
know others in your area:
http://www.michellebarone.net/
She has a yahoogroup, I see there, too.
Unschooling isn't neglect, but that doesn't mean there can't be
neglect in a family saying "unschooling."
Maybe family therapy by someone who really understands unschooling
could make all the difference in your situation!
This does sound dire, and I'm sorry to hear you've had a disasterous
run of circumstances.
-=-However, now, years later, I am crumbling under the
responsibilities of being a single, working, unschooling mom. I am
exhausted, my
health is tenuous, my finances nonexistent, and the sparkle/hope is
fading from
my kids eyes. -=-
Would the kids like to go to school at all? I mean even if they go
just for a place to be with other people, might it be helpful in some
ways?
http://sandradodd.com/schoolchoice
Some of that might make you feel better.
Sandra
> Has anyone found a supportive therapist that won't reportCalling unschooling neglect might be something some therapists would
> unschoolers for
> neglect?
do.
There is someone who does long-distance counselling, and who might
know others in your area:
http://www.michellebarone.net/
She has a yahoogroup, I see there, too.
Unschooling isn't neglect, but that doesn't mean there can't be
neglect in a family saying "unschooling."
Maybe family therapy by someone who really understands unschooling
could make all the difference in your situation!
This does sound dire, and I'm sorry to hear you've had a disasterous
run of circumstances.
-=-However, now, years later, I am crumbling under the
responsibilities of being a single, working, unschooling mom. I am
exhausted, my
health is tenuous, my finances nonexistent, and the sparkle/hope is
fading from
my kids eyes. -=-
Would the kids like to go to school at all? I mean even if they go
just for a place to be with other people, might it be helpful in some
ways?
http://sandradodd.com/schoolchoice
Some of that might make you feel better.
Sandra
Joanna Wilkinson
> If due to financial or medical necessity, you became lessavailable to your
> unschooled children, what would you do?Are there other unschoolers near you? Or more relaxed homeschoolers?
>
You need to reach out to someone and ask for help. You shouldn't
feel indulgent for doing that, you are trying to help your kids.
I would try to find places for my kids to be that they would enjoy.
Other people to hang out with , while I'm gone.
Maybe brainstorming about the resources in your area would help.
Are there home/unschooling support groups near you.
Ask for help.
I have looked for unschoolers in my area for years. We are few and
far between. I finally joined the local Christian homeschoolers
yahoo group to find out about events going on in our area, and have
met some really nice families that my kids like playing with. And
suprisingly, even though they "do school" they are more relaxed
than I expected.
Saying you felt indulgent for asking for help on this yahoo group,
said a lot to me. How are you going to get what you need if your
reluctant to ask for it.
Joanna