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> I know from the kid-side and from seeing other
> families and from my own impatient reactions in time past that I COULD make
> it all
> tense and horrible. I know how to make it all tense and horrible. And that
> means I know what NOT to do. I know how to make it pleasant and peaceful.
>
>
>
For years our family went once or twice a year to stay at the beach trailer
on base. They were basic, so it meant packing up huge amounts of "stuff". We
wanted to get there right at check-in time, there was all the closing up of
the home stuff to do, and all the remembering this and that.

Finally, one time while we were getting ready, I simply declared, "We are on
vacation RIGHT now." We went when we were ready - not by trying to beat the
clock. It simply didn't matter, and we were creating tension when it didn't
need to be there.

After that, sometimes we got there early, and took a little walk on the beach
before we checked in. Sometimes we were much later - and it simply didn't
matter.

Now I travel with other adult friends to dance weekends and other things. I
tell them we are "on vacation NOW", and then it doesn't matter if someone is
running late in the carpool and they seem to enjoy the change in focus.

That shift has eased lots of situations to make them fun instead of tense.
It seems so easy and obvious, but the contrast before and after making that
shift is amazing!

Connie
www.homeschoolingreflections.com



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Gold Standard

>>We went when we were ready - not by trying to beat the
>>clock. It simply didn't matter, and we were creating tension when it
didn't
>>need to be there.

It took us at least four years of never leaving "on time" for our vacations
(usually road trips) to finally think that maybe we were setting ourselves
up. In our better times, the usually stressing plan to leave at 7am (which
inevitably ends up being 12pm) is dropped for the more relaxed and exciting
plan of taking our time, making sure we have what we want, and going out the
door. Then we find out what our REAL departure time is :). What do we miss
with this plan? Hard to say, but it can't be much because we were living and
enjoying the moment!

This doesn't work so well when we have to catch a flight, but that's when we
find out we really DON'T have to have everything packed that we think we do,
or HAVE to take a shower before we leave, or nowadays, even HAVE to have the
plane ticket in tow :)

Jacki