[email protected]

>>For those of you who have older boys and have done the family bed
thing, any comments?<<




I missed the middle part of this subject line. I dropped it a while back,
did catch this phrase on someone else's post though. We have two boys that
sleep with us, 9 and 7. It seems very natural to us. We have always had a family
bed.

I first heard of the family bed when I was a nurse in the army. I hadn't
even met Jackson then. But a nurse, she was from the Philippines, she said they
had always had a family bed and even now, well then, her boys were 16 and 17
and when they were stressed or needed comforting, they would crawl in bed with
the parents and sleep there for the night. It was very comforting to them.
And she loved the closeness they share as a family.
Pam G


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 5/29/2004 8:02:31 AM Central Standard Time,
Genant2@... writes:
I missed the middle part of this subject line. I dropped it a while back,
did catch this phrase on someone else's post though. We have two boys that
sleep with us, 9 and 7. It seems very natural to us. We have always had a
family
bed.
~~~

We went to see "Man on Fire" last night. Denzel Washington and Christopher
Walken. It was okay. Did a really good job of showcasing Mexico City.
Christopher Walken played a former US government bad guy who had turned his life
around. In one scene he's awakened by a phone call, and when he sits up, there
is his Mexican wife and their little 6ish yo boy asleep next to him.

I know it was a plot device to show how soft the former bad guy had become,
but it was sweet.

Tuck


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Dana Matt

I missed the conversation about family bed as well,
but just wanted to say that my 11.5 yo and my still
nursling 6 yo sleep with us as well...
Dana in Montana




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Lynn

This might sound silly but I've always wondered - my husband and I are 60 years old and have health problems that make lovemaking (as in just for the fun of it) a low priority on our list of have too's. We are raising our spec needs (fetal alcohol syndrome grandson, almost 15) and he sleeps with my husband. He used to sleep with me because I needed to know where he was and what he was up to at all times. When he got to the point that he was older and not so sickly he moved in with my husband (husband snores, uses C-PAP -- I have my own medical problems that made it difficult for him (grandson - husband too to be in my bed.) We periodically try to get him to sleep in his own bed but he usually ends up not making it through the night. At other peoples homes he is able to tolerate sleeping alone.

My question to the group is -- Are you all celibate?

Lynn W
So. OR


I missed the conversation about family bed as well,
but just wanted to say that my 11.5 yo and my still
nursling 6 yo sleep with us as well...
Dana in Montana



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/1/04 4:19:48 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
hoffmanwilson@... writes:

> my still
> nursling 6 yo sleep with us as well...
>

I love to hear that. My 7 year old is still nursing.
Pam G


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/1/2004 11:32:09 PM Mountain Daylight Time,
lynnweese@... writes:
My question to the group is -- Are you all celibate?
================

At our old house, we had the kids in a bedroom next to us. I started out the
night with nurslings, and when they were asleep (which usually knocked me out
for awhile too), I might go to the other bed. If there was a kid with my
husband, sometimes I'd move him into the kid-room. But we had a deal in those
days that anytime I had the energy and the mood, my husband was willing to be
woken up.

The kids were rarely awake when he woke up to go to work.

We didn't have to use the bed if we wanted to make love. There were other
places.

Our new house is bigger and our kids are older and though sometimes Holly
(12) wants me to sleep with her, and when we travel she often sleeps with me,
usually she's happy to be alone.

A while back she slept with her dad one night when I was going to a midnight
movie with the boys and I didn't want to leave her in the front of the house
all alone. I slept in her bed that night because we got back so late.

Sandra


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Angela

Sex doesn't have to happen only in your bed. If the kids are sleeping in
your bed, try the living room floor. ;0)

Angela
<mailto:game-enthusiast@...> game-enthusiast@...

My question to the group is -- Are you all celibate?

Lynn W
So. OR


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/2/04 1:32:11 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
lynnweese@... writes:

> My question to the group is -- Are you all celibate?

Ummm...NO.
Actually having the boys in our bed has made us very creative. There are
more places to have sex than in your bed. LOL.
I know probably too much information.
Pam G


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/2/2004 1:32:15 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
lynnweese@... writes:

My question to the group is -- Are you all celibate?<<<


LOL!
Just creative! <G>
But mine are eight and 16. It DOES get easier----and roomier! Cameron (16)
prefers his own room now and has for several years. Duncan (8) often will
spend the night with a friend, his brother, or in his own room. I guess he's only
in our bed 2-3 nights/month now.
Thanks for the giggle!

~Kelly


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/2/2004 7:49:59 AM Central Standard Time,
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
But mine are eight and 16. It DOES get easier----and roomier! Cameron (16)
prefers his own room now and has for several years.
~~~

You have to be careful with those 16 yo's, though. If they're like mine
were, your sex life can become a topic of their conversation! @@

Karen


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Elizabeth Hill

**

Actually having the boys in our bed has made us very creative. There are
more places to have sex than in your bed. LOL.**

Yeah, because our son didn't need his own bedroom when he slept with us, the room that would have been his bedroom was "the playroom".
<g>

Betsy

Jeff Krauskopf

Think about the pioneers when everyone slept in the same room all the time yet they had lots of kids! Where there is a will there is a way.
Jacquie
----- Original Message -----
From: Angela
To: [email protected]
Sent: Wednesday, June 02, 2004 6:15 AM
Subject: RE: [AlwaysLearning] family bed was:healthy boundaries and scanning material


Sex doesn't have to happen only in your bed. If the kids are sleeping in
your bed, try the living room floor. ;0)

Angela
<mailto:game-enthusiast@...> game-enthusiast@...

My question to the group is -- Are you all celibate?

Lynn W
So. OR


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]



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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Hehehe, no. As me being pregnant with our third can testify to. :)

We, ummm.... have a VERY comfortable couch. ;)

~Rebecca
--
You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help."
-Calvin



> My question to the group is -- Are you all celibate?
>
> Lynn W
> So. OR

Diana Tashjian

Did they always care if whomever was in the house was aware of what
was happening?

Diana Tashjian
----- Original Message -----
From: "Jeff Krauskopf" <jksinfw@...>

> Think about the pioneers when everyone slept in the same room all
the time yet they had lots of kids! Where there is a will there is a
way.

<snip>

Barbara Chase

>Did they always care if whomever was in the house was aware of what
>was happening?


I don't know about the pioneers, but awhile ago on another list related to
The Continuum Concept there was a great discussion inspired by a Native
American's account of what it was like to grow up in his culture,
co-sleeping with his parents, having conversations with them about sex when
he was a young boy, etc. One really touching story was when his parents
decided to have another child his younger sister (who was still cosleeping
w/ them at the time) would sing songs to the new child who was yet to be
conceived as his parents made love.

Some of this discussion also occurred on a yahoo group called talk-w-zak.
It isn't very active now, but the old discussions are probably still there.


ciao
--bc--

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/2/04 4:56:46 PM, dtashjian@... writes:

<< Did they always care if whomever was in the house was aware of what

was happening? >>

I do know that it was somewhat common for parents to give their children a
dose of peregoric at night to help them sleep and keep them regular. I do
believe that children doped up on opium might be apt to sleep through some
parental activity.

Sandra

semperliberi

Yes. You just *think* it's difficult when they're young. You just have to
be creative then. When they're grown, you have to worry they'll hear you
because they'll *know* what you're doing! LOL

----- Original Message -----
From: <tuckervill2@...>
> You have to be careful with those 16 yo's, though. If they're like mine
> were, your sex life can become a topic of their conversation! @@

[email protected]

In a message dated 6/3/2004 1:40:51 AM Central Standard Time,
semperliberi@... writes:
When they're grown, you have to worry they'll hear you
because they'll *know* what you're doing! LOL
~~~

Exactly. Good argument for letting them come in really really late.

We were kind of stuck, though. We had two driving teenagers in the house and
the third kid in the bed. We transiitioned him to the floor at some point.
At appropriate times, I would just lift up his blankets and drag him into the
walk-in closet for a bit. ;()

Karen


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Schuyler Waynforth

In Marjorie Shostak's book Nisa: the life and words of a !Kung woman
Nisa talks about how she could remember lying in the communal bed and
hearing her parents having sex. There wasn't anything judgemental in
the way it was presented. Maybe the only prurience was in the fact
that Marjorie Shostak recorded the event. Sort of echoes of Margaret
Mead.

Schuyler

--- In [email protected], SandraDodd@a... wrote:
>
> In a message dated 6/2/04 4:56:46 PM, dtashjian@c... writes:
>
> << Did they always care if whomever was in the house was aware of
what
>
> was happening? >>
>
> I do know that it was somewhat common for parents to give their
children a
> dose of peregoric at night to help them sleep and keep them
regular. I do
> believe that children doped up on opium might be apt to sleep
through some
> parental activity.
>
> Sandra