Re: college
[email protected]
In our family's experience the kids haven't had a very difficult time
adjusting to taking college classes. Chris, the oldest, was always very academically
oriented. We had just returned from Okinawa, when he was eighteen, so he
started community college full-time. He absolutely loved it. He said he felt so
"fresh" compared to the other students.
Shawn, was next, and didn't go til he was nearly 21. He had some difficulty
taking notes, but worked on it. All of the kids are/were comfortable talking
to their professors, so they asked for help and clarification when they needed
it.
Both Devin and Donika started by taking just one or two classes as high
school students at the community class, so they eased into it.
The bottom line is that the kids went to college because they wanted to.
Yes, there were a few adjustments, but they asked questions, and figured it out
quickly. As long as the desire to be there is personal, the self-motivation is
there too, and it works.
I believe what the kids have learned at home is to seek information. Because
their natural curiousity is still intact, it puts them in the fore-ground in
the college arena.
Connie
www.homeschoolingreflections.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
adjusting to taking college classes. Chris, the oldest, was always very academically
oriented. We had just returned from Okinawa, when he was eighteen, so he
started community college full-time. He absolutely loved it. He said he felt so
"fresh" compared to the other students.
Shawn, was next, and didn't go til he was nearly 21. He had some difficulty
taking notes, but worked on it. All of the kids are/were comfortable talking
to their professors, so they asked for help and clarification when they needed
it.
Both Devin and Donika started by taking just one or two classes as high
school students at the community class, so they eased into it.
The bottom line is that the kids went to college because they wanted to.
Yes, there were a few adjustments, but they asked questions, and figured it out
quickly. As long as the desire to be there is personal, the self-motivation is
there too, and it works.
I believe what the kids have learned at home is to seek information. Because
their natural curiousity is still intact, it puts them in the fore-ground in
the college arena.
Connie
www.homeschoolingreflections.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 6/11/04 9:22:07 AM Pacific Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:
Shawn did take the GED - his decision - he studied with a study guide, (Russ
and I took some practice tests from it - and discovered we don't know much :-)
), and passed the test. He was 18, and at that time wasn't planning to go to
college at all. Now he's the one headed for grad school - see how things
change??
Both Shawn and his older brother have their college degrees - Chris from CA,
Shawn from PA, and the GED was not required. They did both enter thro comm.
college ---
I feel it is best to not worry and figure it out when you get there. Saying
that I realize that because we were ignorant about qualification for college
sports stuff some of Shawn's opportunities with the diving got messed up. But
in the end he went to a terrific school, with a kind and wonderful coach. So
what if he was just national champion for two years at a double AA college
instead of the triple A??? Ok, I felt sorry for the competition ( I'm not good
with the competing stuff) when he won by over 100 pts, and thought he really
needed to be at the next level up, but ----- he had used up the eligibility
somehow---
So moral of the story - don't worry, but be prepared!!! Is that possible?
Connie
www.homeschoolingreflections.com
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[email protected] writes:
> Interesting this can up now and I'm reading it today. ;-) Did any ofHi,
> your kids have to have a GED to get their college degree? (Not com. college)
> I ask because my SIL was here last night from GA and stated that students
> have to have a GED or High School deploma to actually get there pieces on
> paper, I mean degree. She said that you can go all you wnat but you won't
> get your deploma with out a GED, etc. She see that as a holy grail I guess.
> Her daughter is 10 and has had 5 yrs of french, bla bla bla.
>
Shawn did take the GED - his decision - he studied with a study guide, (Russ
and I took some practice tests from it - and discovered we don't know much :-)
), and passed the test. He was 18, and at that time wasn't planning to go to
college at all. Now he's the one headed for grad school - see how things
change??
Both Shawn and his older brother have their college degrees - Chris from CA,
Shawn from PA, and the GED was not required. They did both enter thro comm.
college ---
I feel it is best to not worry and figure it out when you get there. Saying
that I realize that because we were ignorant about qualification for college
sports stuff some of Shawn's opportunities with the diving got messed up. But
in the end he went to a terrific school, with a kind and wonderful coach. So
what if he was just national champion for two years at a double AA college
instead of the triple A??? Ok, I felt sorry for the competition ( I'm not good
with the competing stuff) when he won by over 100 pts, and thought he really
needed to be at the next level up, but ----- he had used up the eligibility
somehow---
So moral of the story - don't worry, but be prepared!!! Is that possible?
Connie
www.homeschoolingreflections.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tia Leschke
>I've got an unschooling friend here in Canada whose son is looking toward a
>I feel it is best to not worry and figure it out when you get there. Saying
>that I realize that because we were ignorant about qualification for college
>sports stuff some of Shawn's opportunities with the diving got messed
>up. But
>in the end he went to a terrific school, with a kind and wonderful coach. So
>what if he was just national champion for two years at a double AA college
>instead of the triple A??? Ok, I felt sorry for the competition ( I'm not
>good
>with the competing stuff) when he won by over 100 pts, and thought he really
>needed to be at the next level up, but ----- he had used up the eligibility
>somehow---
pro baseball career. He's hoping for a US baseball scholarship but they
don't know how he's going to manage to get in without the famous diploma.
Any thoughts on what he should be doing now? He's 15.
Tia
pam sorooshian
On Jun 11, 2004, at 7:56 PM, Tia Leschke wrote:
eligibility. They have to turn in SAT or ACT scores, transcripts, and
names of textbooks used to study various specific subjects, proof they
were in compliance with the law while homeschooling, and more. Check
the NCAA website - and there are some brand new rules for
homeschoolers, so also maybe write to the NCAA and ask for the new
rules, too, since their website might not have been updated yet.
-pam
National Home Education Network
<www.NHEN.org>
Serving the entire homeschooling community since 1999
through information, networking and public relations.
> I've got an unschooling friend here in Canada whose son is lookingThere are rules specifically for homeschoolers to obtain NCAA
> toward a
> pro baseball career. He's hoping for a US baseball scholarship but they
> don't know how he's going to manage to get in without the famous
> diploma.
> Any thoughts on what he should be doing now? He's 15.
eligibility. They have to turn in SAT or ACT scores, transcripts, and
names of textbooks used to study various specific subjects, proof they
were in compliance with the law while homeschooling, and more. Check
the NCAA website - and there are some brand new rules for
homeschoolers, so also maybe write to the NCAA and ask for the new
rules, too, since their website might not have been updated yet.
-pam
National Home Education Network
<www.NHEN.org>
Serving the entire homeschooling community since 1999
through information, networking and public relations.
J Geller
I JUST had that thought the other day regarding my 17 yo daughter, in
particular. She said to me that she doubted she'd want to go to
college and I had a momentary pang of "oh, dear."
------------------------------------------------------------------------
I too went through the whole "but what if he decides to go to college"??? Which he does talk about off and on. Zac is 14 now and I really think that if he chooses to go to college he will pick up the skills he needs at that point and I will stand beside him and help him if he needs or asks me to - in whatever way he needs.
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I just read this article in the NYTimes about how kids who go away to college are more likely to show problematic behavior, drink too much and destroy property than kids who don't go away to college. http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/31/college-students-behaving-badly/?em
My husband and I both went to Ivy league schools and have advanced degrees. Having our boys go to college was never a question for us; it was a matter of which high-powered East Coast school (or Stanford) they would go to. Then we started homeschooling our middle son and then our youngest, and then we started moving towards unschooling. My oldest ended up going to the local community college through a program where the district paid for it and then finished at a commuter campus of the state university and lived at home. By the end, he was really ready to be done with the hoop jumping and nonsense. We were able to leave it up to him as to whether he wanted to finish. He just graduated in June and is now unschooling. (Yes, it took us a while to get there.) He always made decisions of what he wanted to do and all the college choices were his, but it was hard for us to shift away from our expectations and we had to defend his choices to my parents. I am really glad that he has the degree but I think he would have been happier if he had gone to work last year, rather than finishing college. We have been doing attentive parenting or radical-unschooling-parenting with him, while he was in college and that worked out really well.
Now my middle son is starting the same Running Start program in the fall and I am trying to get out of my college-driven mindset. I may need lots of smacks on the head. I am trying to make sure the he is taking what he wants and exploring whatever sounds interesting, rather than working towards a degree. A full schedule is paid for and I want him to take advantage of that. But that is a controlling thought. I keep find myself having these kinds of thoughts. Like he should take a full schedule because it is paid for. And he needs to get good grades in the classes that he takes because it will be on his permanent transcript. They don't allow pass/fail in the program and he can't take classes there if he isn't in the program, since he is only 15. But I have to keep reminding myself that he doesn't have to get all As.
He totally wants to do this program and has tons of friends who are doing it and going to this school. Since he has been unschooling, I am afraid that he will have trouble jumping through their hoops and conforming to their rules. I can help him with that but want to do it because he wants it rather than because I want it.
I know some of you have had kids who went to college, any advice?
Jae
Redmond, WA
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particular. She said to me that she doubted she'd want to go to
college and I had a momentary pang of "oh, dear."
------------------------------------------------------------------------
I too went through the whole "but what if he decides to go to college"??? Which he does talk about off and on. Zac is 14 now and I really think that if he chooses to go to college he will pick up the skills he needs at that point and I will stand beside him and help him if he needs or asks me to - in whatever way he needs.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I just read this article in the NYTimes about how kids who go away to college are more likely to show problematic behavior, drink too much and destroy property than kids who don't go away to college. http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/31/college-students-behaving-badly/?em
My husband and I both went to Ivy league schools and have advanced degrees. Having our boys go to college was never a question for us; it was a matter of which high-powered East Coast school (or Stanford) they would go to. Then we started homeschooling our middle son and then our youngest, and then we started moving towards unschooling. My oldest ended up going to the local community college through a program where the district paid for it and then finished at a commuter campus of the state university and lived at home. By the end, he was really ready to be done with the hoop jumping and nonsense. We were able to leave it up to him as to whether he wanted to finish. He just graduated in June and is now unschooling. (Yes, it took us a while to get there.) He always made decisions of what he wanted to do and all the college choices were his, but it was hard for us to shift away from our expectations and we had to defend his choices to my parents. I am really glad that he has the degree but I think he would have been happier if he had gone to work last year, rather than finishing college. We have been doing attentive parenting or radical-unschooling-parenting with him, while he was in college and that worked out really well.
Now my middle son is starting the same Running Start program in the fall and I am trying to get out of my college-driven mindset. I may need lots of smacks on the head. I am trying to make sure the he is taking what he wants and exploring whatever sounds interesting, rather than working towards a degree. A full schedule is paid for and I want him to take advantage of that. But that is a controlling thought. I keep find myself having these kinds of thoughts. Like he should take a full schedule because it is paid for. And he needs to get good grades in the classes that he takes because it will be on his permanent transcript. They don't allow pass/fail in the program and he can't take classes there if he isn't in the program, since he is only 15. But I have to keep reminding myself that he doesn't have to get all As.
He totally wants to do this program and has tons of friends who are doing it and going to this school. Since he has been unschooling, I am afraid that he will have trouble jumping through their hoops and conforming to their rules. I can help him with that but want to do it because he wants it rather than because I want it.
I know some of you have had kids who went to college, any advice?
Jae
Redmond, WA
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Joyce Fetteroll
On Aug 2, 2008, at 3:39 PM, J Geller wrote:
control? I think it's far more likely the kids are reacting to
finally being out from under control than that college is causing it.
different than we intend.
against unschooling to help our kids explore other choices. Sometimes
they end up choosing something not because it's best but because they
don't know what else is available that's similar. They don't
purposely want to spend money willy nilly.
Maybe if you divide the classes he is taking into how much it's
costing and comparing similar classes outside the program you might
feel better about him not squeezing in another class.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> I just read this article in the NYTimes about how kids who go away*Or* do kids who go away to college do so to get away from too much
> to college are more likely to show problematic behavior, drink too
> much and destroy property than kids who don't go away to college.
control? I think it's far more likely the kids are reacting to
finally being out from under control than that college is causing it.
> I am trying to make sure the he is taking what he wants andHow are you "making sure"? Sometimes our help can end up feeling
> exploring whatever sounds interesting, rather than working towards
> a degree.
>
different than we intend.
> Like he should take a full schedule because it is paid for. And heI think it would depend on what other options there are. It's not
> needs to get good grades in the classes that he takes because it
> will be on his permanent transcript
>
>
against unschooling to help our kids explore other choices. Sometimes
they end up choosing something not because it's best but because they
don't know what else is available that's similar. They don't
purposely want to spend money willy nilly.
Maybe if you divide the classes he is taking into how much it's
costing and comparing similar classes outside the program you might
feel better about him not squeezing in another class.
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Paula Sjogerman
On Aug 2, 2008, at 2:39 PM, J Geller wrote:
It certainly hasn't been Zoe's experience and she has PLENTY of
opportunity to all kinds of things at her school in New York.
Paula
> I just read this article in the NYTimes about how kids who go awayI doubt this is mostly true for unschoolers.
> to college are more likely to show problematic behavior, drink too
> much and destroy property than kids who don't go away to college.
> http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/31/college-students-behaving-
> badly/?em
>
It certainly hasn't been Zoe's experience and she has PLENTY of
opportunity to all kinds of things at her school in New York.
Paula
donnakeeble
> On Aug 2, 2008, at 2:39 PM, J Geller wrote:I hope she is not the only one!!!!
>
> > I just read this article in the NYTimes about how kids who go away
> > to college are more likely to show problematic behavior, drink too
> > much and destroy property than kids who don't go away to college.
> > http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/31/college-students-behaving-
> > badly/?em
> >
>
>
> I doubt this is mostly true for unschoolers.
>
> It certainly hasn't been Zoe's experience and she has PLENTY of
> opportunity to all kinds of things at her school in New York.
>
> Paula
>
I'm working within the theory that my children will have freedom now
while they are at home and practice making decisions for themselves.
When/if they go away to college, it will not be the first time in
their lives where they have been responsible for their own actions.
They will have no "need" to act out of control or to excess. In my
opinion, mainstream children typically are more controlled by their
parents or school authorities - they are given a curriculum, schedules
and bells ring to tell them where and when to be at their assigned
places. Their extra-curricular activities are planned and mandatory
drug testing is put in place to "help them say no to peer pressure".
Teen pregnancy is the stuff of gossip among the kids and parents with
little empathy or compassion for the girls involved.... I know these
are generalizations, but it is just a little bit of why we unschool.
My children are "allowed", heck, they're expected to make their own
decisions. We have fun and focus on respect for others and "doing no
harm". We've talked about alcohol and sex and sexuality and drugs
and.... They know my views and I hope they will share their own views
with me and their peers. We may not be perfect and the road may get
bumpy, but I am sure it will be better as an unschooling family than
if I tried to micromanage their behaviour and decisions.
Donna
J Geller
I am trying to make sure the he is taking what he wants and
different than we intend.
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Ah, thanks. You are so right. I can't "make sure" that he likes his classes or that he does well. Even if he drops out, hates a class or fails a class, he will still be learning a lot. I think that I want him to be successful, which is fine but I am thinking of success as enjoying his classes and getting good grades. I don't believe in grades in school or college but get caught up in being graded. I would not be at all concerned if he were taking classes pass/fail. I think I am a slave to the expectations of the system. I knew that something was bothering me about my reaction to this but couldn't put my finger on what I needed to work on.
Jae
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> exploring whatever sounds interesting, rather than working towardsHow are you "making sure"? Sometimes our help can end up feeling
> a degree.
>
different than we intend.
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Ah, thanks. You are so right. I can't "make sure" that he likes his classes or that he does well. Even if he drops out, hates a class or fails a class, he will still be learning a lot. I think that I want him to be successful, which is fine but I am thinking of success as enjoying his classes and getting good grades. I don't believe in grades in school or college but get caught up in being graded. I would not be at all concerned if he were taking classes pass/fail. I think I am a slave to the expectations of the system. I knew that something was bothering me about my reaction to this but couldn't put my finger on what I needed to work on.
Jae
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]