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In a message dated 11/23/02 1:56:57 AM, pamsoroosh@... writes:

<< I ran into an odd cultural difference in my extended family - - my
sister's

in-laws where there is a propensity for adults to hold out a coin and ask

little children to give a kiss to get the coin. This just appalls me - bet

it does some of you, too, but it is SUPER common in the local

mexican-american culture - >>

Coins? $5 sometimes.

And weddings, when the bride is hispanic in Santa Fe and points north (I
don't know about southern New Mexico; haven't been to weddings there), at the
reception people pin money to her dress when they dance with her. $20s and
$50s. NEVER saw it at any anglo wedding or Indian weddings, and have been
to lots of all.

It would not go over a BIT at a Baptist wedding (where they're probably not
going to dance at all anyway).

There are cultural differences which are worth considering when dealing with
Pueblo Indians. They're very superstitious about babies, and one way to keep
babies healthy is not to praise them too much. It's really rude for someone
to gush over a newborn baby of theirs and say "what a perfect baby" or "she's
so cute." You can say "Cute, but small." As long as you state a flaw or
qualify the statement it's okay. Or you can just say something less personal
like how nice she was born before it was really cold outside, or great that
her grandmother was there when she was born.

To treat them just exactly the way you would treat anyone else out of a sense
of fairness and non-racism would end up being rude.

And I found when I was younger that if I went to visit in the Pueblo and
really praised some object, they felt obligated to give it to me, so I quit
saying "This is beautiful," or anything like that. I would say "Did Betty
paint this?" or "Can we listen to this album?" If I said "I wish I had that
album" they might hand it to me and that wasn't what I meant at all.

Sandra

Sandra

Tia Leschke

Coins? $5 sometimes.

And weddings, when the bride is hispanic in Santa Fe and points north (I
don't know about southern New Mexico; haven't been to weddings there), at
the
reception people pin money to her dress when they dance with her. $20s and
$50s. NEVER saw it at any anglo wedding or Indian weddings, and have been
to lots of all.

LOL! I spent a few seconds wondering why the bride would point north. <g>
Then I read the rest.
Tia

Deborah Lewis

***And weddings, when the bride is hispanic in Santa Fe and points north
(I
don't know about southern New Mexico; haven't been to weddings there), at
the
reception people pin money to her dress when they dance with her. $20s
and
$50s. NEVER saw it at any anglo wedding or Indian weddings, and have
been
to lots of all.***

Well, Darlin' you haven't been to a good ol' Montana cowboy weddin'!
It's a dollar a dance for the bucks wantin' to dance with the little
filly!

Couldn't believe my EYES when I first saw this, at my dear friend Judy's
wedding.
It's a cowboy cultural thing I guess. YE HAW!

Deb L

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In a message dated 11/23/2002 3:34:23 PM Eastern Standard Time,
ddzimlew@... writes:


>
> Well, Darlin' you haven't been to a good ol' Montana cowboy weddin'!
> It's a dollar a dance for the bucks wantin' to dance with the little
> filly!
>
> Couldn't believe my EYES when I first saw this, at my dear friend Judy's
> wedding.
> It's a cowboy cultural thing I guess. YE HAW!
>

Nope, we have it here in Ohio and it's actually known as the Dollar Dance.
The best man and the maid of honor collect the dollars and let the next in
line know when it's their turn to dance with the bride or the groom.
Amy Kagey
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

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In a message dated 11/23/02 2:34:24 PM Central Standard Time,
ddzimlew@... writes:

> Well, Darlin' you haven't been to a good ol' Montana cowboy weddin'!
> It's a dollar a dance for the bucks wantin' to dance with the little
> filly!
>
> Couldn't believe my EYES when I first saw this, at my dear friend Judy's
> wedding.
> It's a cowboy cultural thing I guess. YE HAW!
>
> Deb L
>

No, we have dollar dances here too. Not all weddings, but many. My cousin had
one at her dance/reception, she had this little silk purse and all the men
who danced with her gave money. My Aunt and I counted it and she received
over eight hundred dollars, mostly in twenties and fifties, some fives and
tens, no ones. So it really shouldn't be called a dollar dance. That doesn't
count all the hundreds and fifties in all the cards she was given.
~Nancy


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Nancy Wooton

on 11/23/02 11:58 AM, Tia Leschke at leschke@... wrote:

> And weddings, when the bride is hispanic in Santa Fe and points north
<snip>
>
> LOL! I spent a few seconds wondering why the bride would point north. <g>
> Then I read the rest.

I imagined that the side of her on which the money was pinned indicated
which direction was north, rather like moss growing on trees in the forest.

Nancy

Stephanie Elms

> Well, Darlin' you haven't been to a good ol' Montana cowboy weddin'!
> It's a dollar a dance for the bucks wantin' to dance with the little
> filly!
>
> Couldn't believe my EYES when I first saw this, at my dear
> friend Judy's
> wedding.
> It's a cowboy cultural thing I guess. YE HAW!

Well, they did that at a friend's wedding right here is good ole conservative
Northern Va (right outside DC). Paid to dance with the bride or the groom...

Stephanie E.