This concerns the idea of what people "have to" do, and also how a person gets from one point to another in the understanding of what unschooling isn't and is. —Sandra
Sheila/Sheran wrote, on the UnschoolingDiscussion list:
"I think though, that some people start out being argumentative but
then end up being convinced in the end. I know I came here several
years ago and was argumentative several times. For me, the big thing
to get over was the idea that I *had to* do certain things to make
sure they grew into good Christian kids. I thought I *had to* at
least make them go to church and Sunday School, do devotions with
them daily, memorize some memory verses, make them do Bible studies.
"When I got here and people said 'No, you don't "have to",' I reacted
in an argumentative way. Not because I wanted to argue, not because
I didn't want to unschool. I was just shocked and my arguing was a
result of that shock. It was my brain's reaction to trying to take
in the extreme opposite of all the things I've ever been told about
how to parent. The arguing was the outward sign that my belief
system was being shaken to the core and that it was uncomfortable
(but necessary) for me.
"I don't know if I could've gotten to the point I'm at if I hadn't
argued with some people on this list. I gave them my best argument,
and they gave me their best argument in return, and it caused me to
think about things REALLY hard. Much harder than if I'd just read
the stuff in a FAQ or in archives."
getting over "have to" and making real choices
Rippy Dusseldorf Saran, on how she used the Always Learning discussion:
BENEFITS beyond just "be a better parent"
Providing things usually obtained formally in other ways.