There is no magic solution, but you might find hope and ideas from others who have been there.

HOLD ON she said, years later. Kelly Lovejoy has come up with the closest to a magic solution I've ever seen:

Ask them whether they think that they did a good job raising you.

If they think they *did*, tell them that they need to back off and trust that you know what you're doing. *You* and your husband are your child's parents, not them. They had their chance; now it's your turn. If they are happy with how you turned out, they need to trust you to do what *you* think is best for your child.

If they think they did a *bad* job, then they DEFINITELY need to back waay off because you don't want to follow suit.

Either way, you win.

~Kelly

I said "grandchild" when I meant "grandparent" once. *sorry*
The notes below were by Amy Childs, the interviewer, producer, publisher. She's so good at all of that.

Alex Polikowsky gives Grandma something to brag about.

Pam Laricchia offers ways to prepare for family gatherings.

Sandra Dodd always has lots of tips and tricks for living more joyfully.

Sue Patterson says don’t be surprised if years down the road, a doubting relative makes a comment about how great your kids are!

(I used a newer link for Sue.)

There is a danger in living an entirely reactionary life. If you do everything the opposite of what your mom did, it's as bad as doing exactly what your mom did without knowing why. Be discriminating and thoughtful. Don't chuck the ghost of the baby you were out with the bathwater of your emotional memories.

Our parents grew up in a different time, with different pressures and realities, and there's no profit in trying to persuade them they should've had the sensibilities you might have now (or that you're developing or would like to have). If you focus on what you want to do with and for your own children and why, the rest of the family can begin to fade in importance. If you're going to let them dictate your every move, that's an easy and sometimes comforting way to live. If you decide not to do that, try to be clear on why and what you do intend before you announce your departure from the parade. It's okay to change gradually. It's okay to say "I'm working on something," or "We're looking into something," or "We're going to try this for a while." It's good to wade in and understand it before trying to defend it fullscale.