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In a message dated 2/20/2005 11:42:00 AM Central Standard Time,
unschooling@... writes:

Could people who have opinions on the play date hot dog bribe story
(excerpted below) please elaborate a bit on why they think it was or
wasn't manipulative? If I'm counting right I saw two "non-manipulative
method of persuasion" and no "manipulation" votes, and I was a bit
surprised. Was it primarily the happy ending, or do people just not
find the series of events manipulative?




~~~
I thought it was a giant power struggle that happened to have a happy
ending. The mother threw down the guantlet over and over--she was just lucky he
didn't pick it up as many times as she threw it down.

I don't think it's wise to force children to do what you want them to do.
Picking him up and carrying him in the house could have gone really badly.
What if he had chosen to fight or resist? What good would that have done?

Also, he sat there in the car and then finally gave up and came in. So he
had a good time. But while he was out in the car, was he thinking that no one
cared how he felt? It's almost as if, given the mom's actions, he had no
choice but to engage in the struggle. Ultimately, he lost. He had to forfeit.
Mom's stronger and bigger and can't wait it out longer. I'm 5 and can't
sit out in the car alone. It's scary, and I can see my mom in the window and
she won't come out to me.

That's not something I want my child to feel.

Karen




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