Queana

Hi everybody! I have been reading about unschooling for at least 4 years,
been off and on various lists. This is our first year at home, although
I�ve been planning to be home for quite some time. Previously, I was a
private school teacher and my kids attended the school I taught at. My kids
are 15, 10 and 6, all boys.

Against my initial better judgment I signed them all up for the charter
school that I work for (working from home now). The 15 y.o. absolutely
hated it so I withdrew him after the first quarter. He will take a couple
jr. college classes starting in January and for now is mostly doing nothing
(although I want to prep him a little bit for the placement test).

With the younger two I have been like a multiple personality freak. The
first quarter we did the charter curriculum by the book. They did fine, but
I hated it because it is so schoolish that it goes against everything I
believe about teaching and learning. Then I decided to forget the
curriculum and unschool. They loved the concept, especially my 10 year old
who decided everything he was doing for fun was learning (picked up on that
pretty dang fast). Then after a couple weeks of that I freaked out about
all the curriculum they were not doing (and the fact that I didn�t discuss
any of this with my husband and he assumed they were still doing the
�school�work) and decided to do a relaxed form of the curriculum. We did
that temporarily, and the kids were not thrilled, so I went back to
unschooling mode. Then back to curriculum mode.

I am a basket case, lol. I�m not sure how to make a decision and stick to
it one way or the other, and how to know that I�m not� I don�t know, not
allowing my kids to live up to their full potential. That�s a ridiculous
statement in one sense because it has always been so obvious to me that the
amazing and wonderful things that they do and know are almost invariably
things they learned and discovered on their own and not from school or from
curriculum. On the other hand� there isn�t really another hand. I think my
big fear/guilt is that *other people* will judge them and will not see their
true brilliance (mommy pride) the way I do. I was always
acknowledged/praised/noticed for my intellect and achievement in schoolish
things� I don�t want that to be their identity but I do want them to be seen
as intelligent and well-rounded.

Anyone have any words of advice for me before I make my kids insane with my
wishywashyness?



~Q~


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Wow, Queana!

You're already here---you just need to believe it! <G> Most people come in not nearly as far along as you are already.

Let GO! You're fine!

~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://liveandlearnconference.org


-----Original Message-----
From: Queana <queana7@...>

Hi everybody! I have been reading about unschooling for at least 4 years,
been off and on various lists. This is our first year at home, although
I've been planning to be home for quite some time. Previously, I was a
private school teacher and my kids attended the school I taught at. My kids
are 15, 10 and 6, all boys.

Against my initial better judgment I signed them all up for the charter
school that I work for (working from home now). The 15 y.o. absolutely
hated it so I withdrew him after the first quarter. He will take a couple
jr. college classes starting in January and for now is mostly doing nothing
(although I want to prep him a little bit for the placement test).

With the younger two I have been like a multiple personality freak. The
first quarter we did the charter curriculum by the book. They did fine, but
I hated it because it is so schoolish that it goes against everything I
believe about teaching and learning. Then I decided to forget the
curriculum and unschool. They loved the concept, especially my 10 year old
who decided everything he was doing for fun was learning (picked up on that
pretty dang fast). Then after a couple weeks of that I freaked out about
all the curriculum they were not doing (and the fact that I didn't discuss
any of this with my husband and he assumed they were still doing the
"school"work) and decided to do a relaxed form of the curriculum. We did
that temporarily, and the kids were not thrilled, so I went back to
unschooling mode. Then back to curriculum mode.

I am a basket case, lol. I'm not sure how to make a decision and stick to
it one way or the other, and how to know that I'm not. I don't know, not
allowing my kids to live up to their full potential. That's a ridiculous
statement in one sense because it has always been so obvious to me that the
amazing and wonderful things that they do and know are almost invariably
things they learned and discovered on their own and not from school or from
curriculum. On the other hand. there isn't really another hand. I think my
big fear/guilt is that *other people* will judge them and will not see their
true brilliance (mommy pride) the way I do. I was always
acknowledged/praised/noticed for my intellect and achievement in schoolish
things. I don't want that to be their identity but I do want them to be seen
as intelligent and well-rounded.

Anyone have any words of advice for me before I make my kids insane with my
wishywashyness?




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Pamela Sorooshian

Sounds like maybe you'd benefit from an in-person support group and
you need to meet other unschooled kids and be around parents who
appreciate kids for themselves, not just for their schoolish
achievements? Mentioning charters and community college - I'm
thinking perhaps you might be here in California?

If so, I might be able to help you find some unschooling support for
you and your kids?

-pam

On Dec 16, 2005, at 7:50 AM, Queana wrote:

> I am a basket case, lol. I�m not sure how to make a decision and
> stick to
> it one way or the other, and how to know that I�m not� I don�t
> know, not
> allowing my kids to live up to their full potential. That�s a
> ridiculous
> statement in one sense because it has always been so obvious to me
> that the
> amazing and wonderful things that they do and know are almost
> invariably
> things they learned and discovered on their own and not from school
> or from
> curriculum. On the other hand� there isn�t really another hand. I
> think my
> big fear/guilt is that *other people* will judge them and will not
> see their
> true brilliance (mommy pride) the way I do. I was always
> acknowledged/praised/noticed for my intellect and achievement in
> schoolish
> things� I don�t want that to be their identity but I do want them
> to be seen
> as intelligent and well-rounded.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Queana

Thanks for the encouragement! I had kind of expected this to be easy for
me, since I understood and believed the theory for so long, and have always
been pretty open in my relationship with my kids anyway (being a partner
with them, providing the desires of their hearts, not limiting tv or video
games, making decisions together, etc.) There is more work to be done in
this area of course particularly with dh although he is much farther along
than most people I know.

I never expected all the emotional ups and downs! It has
totally thrown me off guard.

~Q~



_____

From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of kbcdlovejo@...
Sent: Friday, December 16, 2005 8:52 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] I'm having big problems!



Wow, Queana!

You're already here---you just need to believe it! <G> Most people come in
not nearly as far along as you are already.

Let GO! You're fine!

~Kelly

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
HYPERLINK
"http://liveandlearnconference.org"http://liveandlearnconference.org


-----Original Message-----
From: Queana <queana7@...>

Hi everybody! I have been reading about unschooling for at least 4 years,
been off and on various lists. This is our first year at home, although
I've been planning to be home for quite some time. Previously, I was a
private school teacher and my kids attended the school I taught at. My kids
are 15, 10 and 6, all boys.

Against my initial better judgment I signed them all up for the charter
school that I work for (working from home now). The 15 y.o. absolutely
hated it so I withdrew him after the first quarter. He will take a couple
jr. college classes starting in January and for now is mostly doing nothing
(although I want to prep him a little bit for the placement test).

With the younger two I have been like a multiple personality freak. The
first quarter we did the charter curriculum by the book. They did fine, but
I hated it because it is so schoolish that it goes against everything I
believe about teaching and learning. Then I decided to forget the
curriculum and unschool. They loved the concept, especially my 10 year old
who decided everything he was doing for fun was learning (picked up on that
pretty dang fast). Then after a couple weeks of that I freaked out about
all the curriculum they were not doing (and the fact that I didn't discuss
any of this with my husband and he assumed they were still doing the
"school"work) and decided to do a relaxed form of the curriculum. We did
that temporarily, and the kids were not thrilled, so I went back to
unschooling mode. Then back to curriculum mode.

I am a basket case, lol. I'm not sure how to make a decision and stick to
it one way or the other, and how to know that I'm not. I don't know, not
allowing my kids to live up to their full potential. That's a ridiculous
statement in one sense because it has always been so obvious to me that the
amazing and wonderful things that they do and know are almost invariably
things they learned and discovered on their own and not from school or from
curriculum. On the other hand. there isn't really another hand. I think my
big fear/guilt is that *other people* will judge them and will not see their
true brilliance (mommy pride) the way I do. I was always
acknowledged/praised/noticed for my intellect and achievement in schoolish
things. I don't want that to be their identity but I do want them to be seen
as intelligent and well-rounded.

Anyone have any words of advice for me before I make my kids insane with my
wishywashyness?




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]




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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Queana

Yes, I would! I am in California. I have met some great homeschoolers this
year already, but no unschoolers (that I know of). If you don't mind I will
email you privately with more specifics of our location. I like to remain a
little bit incognito on lists where I'm discussing my children and their
education (for lots of reasons mainly having to do with my occupation and
job security :)
~Q~


-----Original Message-----
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Pamela Sorooshian
Sent: Friday, December 16, 2005 9:51 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] I'm having big problems!

Sounds like maybe you'd benefit from an in-person support group and
you need to meet other unschooled kids and be around parents who
appreciate kids for themselves, not just for their schoolish
achievements? Mentioning charters and community college - I'm
thinking perhaps you might be here in California?

If so, I might be able to help you find some unschooling support for
you and your kids?

-pam

On Dec 16, 2005, at 7:50 AM, Queana wrote:

> I am a basket case, lol. I’m not sure how to make a decision and
> stick to
> it one way or the other, and how to know that I’m not… I don’t
> know, not
> allowing my kids to live up to their full potential. That’s a
> ridiculous
> statement in one sense because it has always been so obvious to me
> that the
> amazing and wonderful things that they do and know are almost
> invariably
> things they learned and discovered on their own and not from school
> or from
> curriculum. On the other hand… there isn’t really another hand. I
> think my
> big fear/guilt is that *other people* will judge them and will not
> see their
> true brilliance (mommy pride) the way I do. I was always
> acknowledged/praised/noticed for my intellect and achievement in
> schoolish
> things… I don’t want that to be their identity but I do want them
> to be seen
> as intelligent and well-rounded.



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]





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Version: 7.1.371 / Virus Database: 267.13.13/200 - Release Date: 12/14/2005


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Checked by AVG Free Edition.
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