Re: [unschoolingbasics] pros-cons question for Kelly
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/3/2005 8:03:32 AM Eastern Standard Time,
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
My child, at 12 was almost completely turned off to learning. He healed.
Hi Kelly and others
I am very interested to hear about children who came to unschooling late.
My son is 12 now and we have been unschooling for 11 months. I am really
starting to feel the sands of time slip through my fingers! I can't believe that
he will have a learners permit to drive in 2 1/2 years! How long did it
take your son to heal Kelly?
Cheryl
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
My child, at 12 was almost completely turned off to learning. He healed.
Hi Kelly and others
I am very interested to hear about children who came to unschooling late.
My son is 12 now and we have been unschooling for 11 months. I am really
starting to feel the sands of time slip through my fingers! I can't believe that
he will have a learners permit to drive in 2 1/2 years! How long did it
take your son to heal Kelly?
Cheryl
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/7/2005 9:21:56 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,
Luckiebyrd@... writes:
I am very interested to hear about children who came to unschooling late.
My son is 12 now and we have been unschooling for 11 months. I am really
starting to feel the sands of time slip through my fingers! I can't
believe that
he will have a learners permit to drive in 2 1/2 years! How long did it
take your son to heal Kelly?<<<<
He left school at the end of sixth grade. He was 12.5. That summer he went
to Australia with People to People for three weeks. We spent the rest of the
summer just hanging out. I read the .com boards and learned as much as I could
about unschooling. I *understood* it, but I had a hard time putting it into
practice.
When loading the car for a trip, I'd point out that that was geometry! <g>
I'd nag him that he hadn't read anything in a while. I would read a short
story to him and ask him to draw a picture of it or of how it made him feel.
After a trip, I'd suggest that he write me a paper about it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah----I know. It took a while to make it work! <bwg> I
probably could have knocked six-eight months off his deschooling if I'd quit nagging
and just TRUSTED him.
He spent 18 months doing NOTHING but sleeping, watching TV, talking on the
phone, and eating. Seriously. It was painful to watch. BUT he needed that
time to heal. It was VERY important!
Slowly, he started to do more. He started with IMing his friends. He'd hated
the computer in school, preferring to write assignments by hand. But he got
*really* fast on the computer and knew more about its capabilities than my
husband or me in just a few short months.
I have another son, eight years younger. We'd go somewhere almost every
day----the park, the zoo, the beach, the library, a restaurant----*somewhere*.
I'd ask each day whether Cameron would like to join us: his answer was always,
"No." Then.....one day, I asked and he said, "Yes!" It was all I could do not
to jump up and do the happy dance----but I did one inside! <g>
Then he started to join us more and more----and we started to do things HE
wanted to do. He started drawing again, so I bought him some really nice papers
and charcoals.
He and his friends started skateboarding, so we got him a skateboard and
sent him to Camp Woodward that summer. Then he started filming other skaters, so
we got him a camera. That eventually led to more filming (and his first 6.5
minute film). Now he volunteers at the local independent film theatre and is
called on by local film-makers to do camera work.
He also asked for drums (who knows why!?), so he got drums one Christmas.
He's really gotten into music. He's playing with three bands---all different
styles. He's had a few lessons, but does it mostly on his own; only going to
Danny when he's struggling with something. He got a high-tech metronome for
Christmas this year. (My dad thought that was SOOOO funny---that a child would
*ask* for a metronome! <g>) He plays three-four hours/day---sometimes more.
Luckily, the drums are in our DEtached garage! <g>
He's traveled to Seattle with Wilderness Ventures. He's made many road trips
on his own since he got his license. He's flying out to Albuquerque by
himself next month and to Europe with his cousin in September.
He has three jobs: delivering a weekly paper to businesses,
pet/house-sitting, and catering. He has his volunteer gig at the theatre. He has the
film-making that keeps him thinking and the drumming that has him finding/playing
gigs at different bars every now and then.
He's so busy now ----like he's making up for those lost months.
He thought he was stupid and was going nowhere without a diploma. That's
what he heard from his friends. NOW his friends think his life is pretty sweet.
So does he! <g> He has three friends from school that he still hangs with.
His girlfriend, who is also in school. But most of his friends are in their
20's, with one in his 30's and 2-3 in their 40's! <g>
He's into Buddhism and is a vegetarian (mostly <g>). He has a lot of
questions and is not afraid to ask them. He LIKES his parents! <g> How novel! <BWG>
I just looked up at the subject. It says "pros-cons question for Kelly."
Cons: He still doesn't care to read much. He prefers non-fiction anyway---always
has. Fiction he prefers through movies. Well, documentaries too! He just
prefers his information that way. But he reads just fine.
He has his own back accounts and has been overdrawn once in three years. I
doubt that'll happen again soon! <g>
He sat in on a college class last spring and was appalled at how little the
students wanted to be there. He liked the subject and participated in the
class, but I doubt he'll go to college. Some may see that as a con. I see it as
well-thought out at this time. But he knows he could do the work.
He's good to his girlfriend and sweet to the animals. He's gentle and
patient with his little brother. He's a loyal friend, but seems to stay away from
the trouble some of them seem to wallow in.
He seems more and more comfortable in his skin every day. Happy with who he
is and what he's doing. THAT is the best part!
That deschooling thing is hard----it's really, really hard. He needs to know
you're there. He needs to know you care. But he needs to be left to heal. I
don't mean just left alone. There's this incredibly fine line between leaving
him alone and letting him alone. I don't know how to explain it. But you'll
know it AFTER you're through it! <G> Go figure!
Riding in the car was a great place for us to talk---that's why we went to
the beach so much that first year! Duncan would fall asleep in the back seat,
and Cameron and I could talk and talk and talk with no interruptions and
without looking at each other (at night with the lights off is good too!).
Quit nagging. Offer cool things to do and good movies to watch. Eat out a
lot. Be his partner. Work together. Let him know that you're willing to let him
heal from that school damage.
It gets better! It gets GREAT!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Luckiebyrd@... writes:
I am very interested to hear about children who came to unschooling late.
My son is 12 now and we have been unschooling for 11 months. I am really
starting to feel the sands of time slip through my fingers! I can't
believe that
he will have a learners permit to drive in 2 1/2 years! How long did it
take your son to heal Kelly?<<<<
He left school at the end of sixth grade. He was 12.5. That summer he went
to Australia with People to People for three weeks. We spent the rest of the
summer just hanging out. I read the .com boards and learned as much as I could
about unschooling. I *understood* it, but I had a hard time putting it into
practice.
When loading the car for a trip, I'd point out that that was geometry! <g>
I'd nag him that he hadn't read anything in a while. I would read a short
story to him and ask him to draw a picture of it or of how it made him feel.
After a trip, I'd suggest that he write me a paper about it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah----I know. It took a while to make it work! <bwg> I
probably could have knocked six-eight months off his deschooling if I'd quit nagging
and just TRUSTED him.
He spent 18 months doing NOTHING but sleeping, watching TV, talking on the
phone, and eating. Seriously. It was painful to watch. BUT he needed that
time to heal. It was VERY important!
Slowly, he started to do more. He started with IMing his friends. He'd hated
the computer in school, preferring to write assignments by hand. But he got
*really* fast on the computer and knew more about its capabilities than my
husband or me in just a few short months.
I have another son, eight years younger. We'd go somewhere almost every
day----the park, the zoo, the beach, the library, a restaurant----*somewhere*.
I'd ask each day whether Cameron would like to join us: his answer was always,
"No." Then.....one day, I asked and he said, "Yes!" It was all I could do not
to jump up and do the happy dance----but I did one inside! <g>
Then he started to join us more and more----and we started to do things HE
wanted to do. He started drawing again, so I bought him some really nice papers
and charcoals.
He and his friends started skateboarding, so we got him a skateboard and
sent him to Camp Woodward that summer. Then he started filming other skaters, so
we got him a camera. That eventually led to more filming (and his first 6.5
minute film). Now he volunteers at the local independent film theatre and is
called on by local film-makers to do camera work.
He also asked for drums (who knows why!?), so he got drums one Christmas.
He's really gotten into music. He's playing with three bands---all different
styles. He's had a few lessons, but does it mostly on his own; only going to
Danny when he's struggling with something. He got a high-tech metronome for
Christmas this year. (My dad thought that was SOOOO funny---that a child would
*ask* for a metronome! <g>) He plays three-four hours/day---sometimes more.
Luckily, the drums are in our DEtached garage! <g>
He's traveled to Seattle with Wilderness Ventures. He's made many road trips
on his own since he got his license. He's flying out to Albuquerque by
himself next month and to Europe with his cousin in September.
He has three jobs: delivering a weekly paper to businesses,
pet/house-sitting, and catering. He has his volunteer gig at the theatre. He has the
film-making that keeps him thinking and the drumming that has him finding/playing
gigs at different bars every now and then.
He's so busy now ----like he's making up for those lost months.
He thought he was stupid and was going nowhere without a diploma. That's
what he heard from his friends. NOW his friends think his life is pretty sweet.
So does he! <g> He has three friends from school that he still hangs with.
His girlfriend, who is also in school. But most of his friends are in their
20's, with one in his 30's and 2-3 in their 40's! <g>
He's into Buddhism and is a vegetarian (mostly <g>). He has a lot of
questions and is not afraid to ask them. He LIKES his parents! <g> How novel! <BWG>
I just looked up at the subject. It says "pros-cons question for Kelly."
Cons: He still doesn't care to read much. He prefers non-fiction anyway---always
has. Fiction he prefers through movies. Well, documentaries too! He just
prefers his information that way. But he reads just fine.
He has his own back accounts and has been overdrawn once in three years. I
doubt that'll happen again soon! <g>
He sat in on a college class last spring and was appalled at how little the
students wanted to be there. He liked the subject and participated in the
class, but I doubt he'll go to college. Some may see that as a con. I see it as
well-thought out at this time. But he knows he could do the work.
He's good to his girlfriend and sweet to the animals. He's gentle and
patient with his little brother. He's a loyal friend, but seems to stay away from
the trouble some of them seem to wallow in.
He seems more and more comfortable in his skin every day. Happy with who he
is and what he's doing. THAT is the best part!
That deschooling thing is hard----it's really, really hard. He needs to know
you're there. He needs to know you care. But he needs to be left to heal. I
don't mean just left alone. There's this incredibly fine line between leaving
him alone and letting him alone. I don't know how to explain it. But you'll
know it AFTER you're through it! <G> Go figure!
Riding in the car was a great place for us to talk---that's why we went to
the beach so much that first year! Duncan would fall asleep in the back seat,
and Cameron and I could talk and talk and talk with no interruptions and
without looking at each other (at night with the lights off is good too!).
Quit nagging. Offer cool things to do and good movies to watch. Eat out a
lot. Be his partner. Work together. Let him know that you're willing to let him
heal from that school damage.
It gets better! It gets GREAT!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/7/2005 10:28:16 PM Eastern Standard Time,
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
is. What can you tell me about it?
Jill
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
>We've gotten letters about this, but have no idea of cost and how good it
> He left school at the end of sixth grade. He was 12.5. That summer he went
> to Australia with People to People for three weeks
is. What can you tell me about it?
Jill
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kim
>on the
>
> He spent 18 months doing NOTHING but sleeping, watching TV, talking
> phone, and eating. Seriously. It was painful to watch. BUT heneeded that
> time to heal. It was VERY important!Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I really needed to hear this today!
>Kelly...
I just hopped on this list to read(and do my usual lurking - I am new
to the group)but was going to write today about my concerns with my
son (that I just found out happen to be very similar to what you went
through).
I pulled him out of 9th grade in Oct(he's 15 in April and my youngest
and only child still at home) and I have been letting him deschool
while I read as much as I could about homeschooling to figure out
"how." After everything I've read, I really think unschooling makes
so much sense.
I have seen a few positive changes in his attitude and he does read
different things on his own(he devours most things on mammals that I
strew in his path). BUT, he does not want to go ANYWHERE, and does
not feel like socializing outside the family and has lately been
sleeping later and later into the day. Most of his time awake is
spent playing online games like World of Warcraft(and I do understand
the value of the games so I am not complaining about that).
Lately I've been getting a lot of questions from the relatives about
how it's going, and I mostly just say OK without many details(they're
not ready to understand unschooling yet)Another problem: my oldest son
is home from college doing an internship(he completed public H.S. in 3
years, but disliked it), and is wondering why his brother is doing
nothing all the time! I thought he would "get it" more than anyone
and be our biggest supporter and instead I find myself having to
defend homeschooling with him!
I guess what I am getting at is that everything happening right now is
causing me to falter and want to slip into a "school mode" to justify
some kind of learning happening. I am worried about starting so late
with my son (Can he really afford a year or more of deschooling?). I
am worried about the portfolio review that needs to happen in June
(What have we got to put in it except a list of books and magazines my
son has read?). I am worried that he will never learn to love
learning again and get out there and do things like so many of the
other unschoolers I have been reading about. Yikes!
BUT, reading what you wrote Kelly, has helped me to not fly into a
total panic and has strengthed my resolve to leave him alone and not
force things. I found exactly what I needed to "hear" at exactly the
moment I needed to hear it. I still am freaking out some on the
inside, but I will keep reading on this list. It is great to have
this support group - you've helped me today more than you know!!
THANK YOU!
Kim in Maine
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
pam sorooshian
On Jan 11, 2005, at 4:18 PM, Kim wrote:
Animal shelter volunteer work?
-pam
> he does readCan you strew some real mammals in his path? Zoos? Pet store job?
> different things on his own(he devours most things on mammals that I
> strew in his path). BUT, he does not want to go ANYWHERE,
Animal shelter volunteer work?
-pam
Kim
--- In [email protected], pam sorooshian
<pamsoroosh@m...> wrote:
going? Last year we took him to a nearby Wildlife Park for his
birthday - a surprise I thought he would love. But at first,he was so
mad we made him go. He eventually had a great time like I knew he
would, but I felt so guilty for pushing him.
There's an animal shelter close by that I know would love to have him
volunteer, and I think he would like working there too. But, every
time I suggest we check it out, he refuses. Is this something that
will change if I am patient and give him more time? Forcing him to go
definitely seems to go against "the unschooling way." But I am
confused about why he refuses when it is something I know he loves.
This contradiction in my son is the thing that is making me worry the
most - I don't understand it.
~Kim
<pamsoroosh@m...> wrote:
>I am trying. But what can I do if he balks at the suggestion of
> On Jan 11, 2005, at 4:18 PM, Kim wrote:
>
> > he does read
> > different things on his own(he devours most things on mammals that I
> > strew in his path). BUT, he does not want to go ANYWHERE,
>
> Can you strew some real mammals in his path? Zoos? Pet store job?
> Animal shelter volunteer work?
>
> -pam
going? Last year we took him to a nearby Wildlife Park for his
birthday - a surprise I thought he would love. But at first,he was so
mad we made him go. He eventually had a great time like I knew he
would, but I felt so guilty for pushing him.
There's an animal shelter close by that I know would love to have him
volunteer, and I think he would like working there too. But, every
time I suggest we check it out, he refuses. Is this something that
will change if I am patient and give him more time? Forcing him to go
definitely seems to go against "the unschooling way." But I am
confused about why he refuses when it is something I know he loves.
This contradiction in my son is the thing that is making me worry the
most - I don't understand it.
~Kim
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/11/2005 7:38:48 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,
knkmoran@... writes:
I just hopped on this list to read(and do my usual lurking - I am new
to the group)but was going to write today about my concerns with my
son (that I just found out happen to be very similar to what you went
through). <<<<
You're welcome, Kim!
I seems I get the most fan mail when I say how tough it was! <G>
strew in his path). BUT, he does not want to go ANYWHERE, and does
not feel like socializing outside the family and has lately been
sleeping later and later into the day. <<<<<<<
Please just give him some time. He needs to trust you. Can *you* go and do
some cool things? Invite him to go, but if he reuses---then GO!
Can *you* volunteer at the shelter one day/week? Just invite him along? ONLY
if you're interested, of course.
Do *you* have any passions he can watch you totally get into? I have dog
grooming/showing. my garden, my bees, cooking, entertaining, decorating,
unschooling, & the conference. My boys *see* me doing so much. That's really
important---to model what you want to see!
not ready to understand unschooling yet)<<<<<<
Yeah---they need to get their noses out of your business! <g>
But you can always just say, "Yes! It's great! He's finally started showing
real signs of healing from school-itis. Every day is better and better. I'm so
glad to have taken this leap of faith with him. He's proving that it was the
best choice for us..." <g>
This will do three things:
1) shut them up! <g>
2) give you confidence
3) give him MORE confidence, if he hears you say it
years, but disliked it), and is wondering why his brother is doing
nothing all the time! I thought he would "get it" more than anyone
and be our biggest supporter and instead I find myself having to
defend homeschooling with him!<<<<<
When we know better, we *do* better.
Tell him you see the anger & frustration in HIM and you want to avoid that
with your younger son.
Can you really afford NOT to?
son has read?).<<<<<
You know, you *could* say that school had him *so* far "behind" that you
chose to "repeat" the last grade! <G> Use those same materials! He's just
"digesting" them.<G>
other unschoolers I have been reading about. Yikes!<<<<<
OK. Have *YOU* learned to love to learn again? If *YOU* have, then it IS
possible. But what you're attempting to do with your son is for him to do it
SOONER than at 28 or 31 or 35!
So rather than look at it as being slow to get that love of learning
back----look at it as learning to love to learn SOONER! <G> You're allowing him to
be AHEAD of the game!
force things. I found exactly what I needed to "hear" at exactly the
moment I needed to hear it. I still am freaking out some on the
inside, but I will keep reading on this list. It is great to have
this support group - you've helped me today more than you know!!
THANK YOU!<<<<<<<
Well, I'm really glad, Kim. I hope you can hold out a little longer----and
SEE the changes that he's making. If you can't see them, then FAKE that you're
seeing it. Believe that it *will* happen----and it will. Believe that it
won't, and ......
Trust and Respect. And Patience!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
knkmoran@... writes:
>Kelly...Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I really needed to hear this today!
I just hopped on this list to read(and do my usual lurking - I am new
to the group)but was going to write today about my concerns with my
son (that I just found out happen to be very similar to what you went
through). <<<<
You're welcome, Kim!
I seems I get the most fan mail when I say how tough it was! <G>
>>>>>>I have seen a few positive changes in his attitude and he does readdifferent things on his own(he devours most things on mammals that I
strew in his path). BUT, he does not want to go ANYWHERE, and does
not feel like socializing outside the family and has lately been
sleeping later and later into the day. <<<<<<<
Please just give him some time. He needs to trust you. Can *you* go and do
some cool things? Invite him to go, but if he reuses---then GO!
Can *you* volunteer at the shelter one day/week? Just invite him along? ONLY
if you're interested, of course.
Do *you* have any passions he can watch you totally get into? I have dog
grooming/showing. my garden, my bees, cooking, entertaining, decorating,
unschooling, & the conference. My boys *see* me doing so much. That's really
important---to model what you want to see!
>>>>>>Lately I've been getting a lot of questions from the relatives abouthow it's going, and I mostly just say OK without many details(they're
not ready to understand unschooling yet)<<<<<<
Yeah---they need to get their noses out of your business! <g>
But you can always just say, "Yes! It's great! He's finally started showing
real signs of healing from school-itis. Every day is better and better. I'm so
glad to have taken this leap of faith with him. He's proving that it was the
best choice for us..." <g>
This will do three things:
1) shut them up! <g>
2) give you confidence
3) give him MORE confidence, if he hears you say it
>>>>>Another problem: my oldest sonis home from college doing an internship(he completed public H.S. in 3
years, but disliked it), and is wondering why his brother is doing
nothing all the time! I thought he would "get it" more than anyone
and be our biggest supporter and instead I find myself having to
defend homeschooling with him!<<<<<
When we know better, we *do* better.
Tell him you see the anger & frustration in HIM and you want to avoid that
with your younger son.
>>>>>I am worried about starting so latewith my son (Can he really afford a year or more of deschooling?).<<<<<
Can you really afford NOT to?
>>>I am worried about the portfolio review that needs to happen in June(What have we got to put in it except a list of books and magazines my
son has read?).<<<<<
You know, you *could* say that school had him *so* far "behind" that you
chose to "repeat" the last grade! <G> Use those same materials! He's just
"digesting" them.<G>
>>>>>I am worried that he will never learn to lovelearning again and get out there and do things like so many of the
other unschoolers I have been reading about. Yikes!<<<<<
OK. Have *YOU* learned to love to learn again? If *YOU* have, then it IS
possible. But what you're attempting to do with your son is for him to do it
SOONER than at 28 or 31 or 35!
So rather than look at it as being slow to get that love of learning
back----look at it as learning to love to learn SOONER! <G> You're allowing him to
be AHEAD of the game!
>>>>>>>BUT, reading what you wrote Kelly, has helped me to not fly into atotal panic and has strengthed my resolve to leave him alone and not
force things. I found exactly what I needed to "hear" at exactly the
moment I needed to hear it. I still am freaking out some on the
inside, but I will keep reading on this list. It is great to have
this support group - you've helped me today more than you know!!
THANK YOU!<<<<<<<
Well, I'm really glad, Kim. I hope you can hold out a little longer----and
SEE the changes that he's making. If you can't see them, then FAKE that you're
seeing it. Believe that it *will* happen----and it will. Believe that it
won't, and ......
Trust and Respect. And Patience!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 1/11/2005 11:40:22 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
Please just give him some time. He needs to trust you. Can *you* go and do
some cool things? Invite him to go, but if he reuses---then GO!<<<<
I'm all for recycling and reusing----but that should read *REFUSES*---sorry!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
Please just give him some time. He needs to trust you. Can *you* go and do
some cool things? Invite him to go, but if he reuses---then GO!<<<<
I'm all for recycling and reusing----but that should read *REFUSES*---sorry!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
J. Stauffer
<<<my garden, my bees, cooking,>>>
Kelli!!!!
You do bees!!!
I want to learn bees so much. Could you recommend some websites, books, etc.?
Thanks,
Julie S.
Kelli!!!!
You do bees!!!
I want to learn bees so much. Could you recommend some websites, books, etc.?
Thanks,
Julie S.
----- Original Message -----
From: kbcdlovejo@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Tuesday, January 11, 2005 10:36 PM
Subject: Re: [unschoolingbasics] Re: pros-cons question for Kelly
In a message dated 1/11/2005 7:38:48 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,
knkmoran@... writes:
>Kelly...
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I really needed to hear this today!
I just hopped on this list to read(and do my usual lurking - I am new
to the group)but was going to write today about my concerns with my
son (that I just found out happen to be very similar to what you went
through). <<<<
You're welcome, Kim!
I seems I get the most fan mail when I say how tough it was! <G>
>>>>>>I have seen a few positive changes in his attitude and he does read
different things on his own(he devours most things on mammals that I
strew in his path). BUT, he does not want to go ANYWHERE, and does
not feel like socializing outside the family and has lately been
sleeping later and later into the day. <<<<<<<
Please just give him some time. He needs to trust you. Can *you* go and do
some cool things? Invite him to go, but if he reuses---then GO!
Can *you* volunteer at the shelter one day/week? Just invite him along? ONLY
if you're interested, of course.
Do *you* have any passions he can watch you totally get into? I have dog
grooming/showing. my garden, my bees, cooking, entertaining, decorating,
unschooling, & the conference. My boys *see* me doing so much. That's really
important---to model what you want to see!
>>>>>>Lately I've been getting a lot of questions from the relatives about
how it's going, and I mostly just say OK without many details(they're
not ready to understand unschooling yet)<<<<<<
Yeah---they need to get their noses out of your business! <g>
But you can always just say, "Yes! It's great! He's finally started showing
real signs of healing from school-itis. Every day is better and better. I'm so
glad to have taken this leap of faith with him. He's proving that it was the
best choice for us..." <g>
This will do three things:
1) shut them up! <g>
2) give you confidence
3) give him MORE confidence, if he hears you say it
>>>>>Another problem: my oldest son
is home from college doing an internship(he completed public H.S. in 3
years, but disliked it), and is wondering why his brother is doing
nothing all the time! I thought he would "get it" more than anyone
and be our biggest supporter and instead I find myself having to
defend homeschooling with him!<<<<<
When we know better, we *do* better.
Tell him you see the anger & frustration in HIM and you want to avoid that
with your younger son.
>>>>>I am worried about starting so late
with my son (Can he really afford a year or more of deschooling?).<<<<<
Can you really afford NOT to?
>>>I am worried about the portfolio review that needs to happen in June
(What have we got to put in it except a list of books and magazines my
son has read?).<<<<<
You know, you *could* say that school had him *so* far "behind" that you
chose to "repeat" the last grade! <G> Use those same materials! He's just
"digesting" them.<G>
>>>>>I am worried that he will never learn to love
learning again and get out there and do things like so many of the
other unschoolers I have been reading about. Yikes!<<<<<
OK. Have *YOU* learned to love to learn again? If *YOU* have, then it IS
possible. But what you're attempting to do with your son is for him to do it
SOONER than at 28 or 31 or 35!
So rather than look at it as being slow to get that love of learning
back----look at it as learning to love to learn SOONER! <G> You're allowing him to
be AHEAD of the game!
>>>>>>>BUT, reading what you wrote Kelly, has helped me to not fly into a
total panic and has strengthed my resolve to leave him alone and not
force things. I found exactly what I needed to "hear" at exactly the
moment I needed to hear it. I still am freaking out some on the
inside, but I will keep reading on this list. It is great to have
this support group - you've helped me today more than you know!!
THANK YOU!<<<<<<<
Well, I'm really glad, Kim. I hope you can hold out a little longer----and
SEE the changes that he's making. If you can't see them, then FAKE that you're
seeing it. Believe that it *will* happen----and it will. Believe that it
won't, and ......
Trust and Respect. And Patience!
~Kelly
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Cheyenne Cain
I just noticed in the USA weekend that they are sponsoring a songwriting contest for teens (ages 13-18).
The lyrics would have to reflect "Make a Difference"
Lots of great prizes including a trip to American Idol. You can look it up at
usaweekend.com
Good luck
Cheyenne
---------------------------------
Do you Yahoo!?
The all-new My Yahoo! � Get yours free!
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The lyrics would have to reflect "Make a Difference"
Lots of great prizes including a trip to American Idol. You can look it up at
usaweekend.com
Good luck
Cheyenne
---------------------------------
Do you Yahoo!?
The all-new My Yahoo! � Get yours free!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]