The shift to unschooling; was laundry
Ren Allen
"If you have time, could you talk more about that transition, what
it looked
like? Did you have a conversation with your kids about your new
outlook or did
you just jump in and do it?"
We pretty much jumped in and did it. But it WAS a slower transition
for us.
We had leaned towards a relaxed/eclectic style for many years.
Having read Holt back in '95/'96,you'd think I would have gotten it
a lot sooner! Unschooling sounded ideal, but I just hadn't made that
paradigm shift to see the learning in everything. I thought my son
needed some pushing. I did a lot of damage, but less than school
would have since he was free to explore the world for the most part.
In early 2000, I started reading at unschooling.com and just loved
what I read. We relaxed even more, then in August of 2000, my dh and
I separated. I was pregnant with babsy #4 and decided this was my
moment to totally LET GO. We lived life. We quit worrying about
math, or writing and just lived together. I still had my chore lists
and bedtimes and tv limits, though I wasn't a nazi about it (well,
except for the tv thing).
Dh and I reconciled in Jan. of 2001, and he moved back in February.
He is a much more structured/organized person than I, so he wanted
to make some changes when he moved back in. We got Nazi-like about
some things. It was awful.
I was reading enough by then to really question the sanity of
everything we were doing and finally got to the point where I said
NO MORE. I told him that if he wanted to damage his relationship
with his children, I couldn't stop him, but I was NOT willing to be
an aid.
It took a while for me to really understand, deep down. But I just
kept struggling my way through all of it. Once in a while,I'd have a
regression and gripe at the kids about too much tv or video games,
that was in 2001. But somewhere in that year, I think May or
Juneish, I quit worrying. Once we embraced ALL of life as learning,
once I realized my children were perfectly capable of making their
own decisions and that acting as their partner really worked...then,
and only then, did unschooling unfold the way I'd read about.
Voila!! We'd done it!:)
I was a lot slower than others here....my stubborn brain was holding
onto that which it was familiar with, school. No longer.
I am their allie now, not the enemy. No longer are there struggles
about trying to make them do things they don't want to do, our house
is more peaceful, more joyful than I could have imagined.
Unschooling was the road to healing for us.
Ren
it looked
like? Did you have a conversation with your kids about your new
outlook or did
you just jump in and do it?"
We pretty much jumped in and did it. But it WAS a slower transition
for us.
We had leaned towards a relaxed/eclectic style for many years.
Having read Holt back in '95/'96,you'd think I would have gotten it
a lot sooner! Unschooling sounded ideal, but I just hadn't made that
paradigm shift to see the learning in everything. I thought my son
needed some pushing. I did a lot of damage, but less than school
would have since he was free to explore the world for the most part.
In early 2000, I started reading at unschooling.com and just loved
what I read. We relaxed even more, then in August of 2000, my dh and
I separated. I was pregnant with babsy #4 and decided this was my
moment to totally LET GO. We lived life. We quit worrying about
math, or writing and just lived together. I still had my chore lists
and bedtimes and tv limits, though I wasn't a nazi about it (well,
except for the tv thing).
Dh and I reconciled in Jan. of 2001, and he moved back in February.
He is a much more structured/organized person than I, so he wanted
to make some changes when he moved back in. We got Nazi-like about
some things. It was awful.
I was reading enough by then to really question the sanity of
everything we were doing and finally got to the point where I said
NO MORE. I told him that if he wanted to damage his relationship
with his children, I couldn't stop him, but I was NOT willing to be
an aid.
It took a while for me to really understand, deep down. But I just
kept struggling my way through all of it. Once in a while,I'd have a
regression and gripe at the kids about too much tv or video games,
that was in 2001. But somewhere in that year, I think May or
Juneish, I quit worrying. Once we embraced ALL of life as learning,
once I realized my children were perfectly capable of making their
own decisions and that acting as their partner really worked...then,
and only then, did unschooling unfold the way I'd read about.
Voila!! We'd done it!:)
I was a lot slower than others here....my stubborn brain was holding
onto that which it was familiar with, school. No longer.
I am their allie now, not the enemy. No longer are there struggles
about trying to make them do things they don't want to do, our house
is more peaceful, more joyful than I could have imagined.
Unschooling was the road to healing for us.
Ren