Michael P. Connor

Hi -

We're exploring the possibility of unschooling for our children (soon to be
5 and 3), but neither my wife nor I want to do it full time. My wife, who
works 30-40 hours/week in a highly responsible job, is less enthusiastic
about it than I am (I love the "unschooling" approach -- esp. Valerie's
"guide" description) and feels overwhelmed by the thought of it most times.
I love being with my daughters, but also enjoy working (as a
trainer/consultant, I have more flexibility) at least part time. My wife's
mother (speaks Bulgarian, very little English) also spends most of the year
with us (Sept - May).

Our other option is an alternative school (Waldorf, Montessori, Sudbury
Valley).

Any thoughts about how we might make unschooling work without feeling
overwhelmed (or, somehow, negligent)?

Thank you for any input.

Mike

----- Original Message -----
From: "Valerie" <valerie@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Monday, June 07, 2004 1:15 PM
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Intro & Question


>
> > It could be that as a beginner I don't quite get the philosophy of
> many unschoolers - which is why I'm on this list, to increase my
> understanding - but what I am wondering is what you or other more
> experienced homeschoolers think of as your role in terms of
> facilitating learning for your kid(s) and is that pretty much the
> same for all unschoolers or does it differ. In other words, how do
> you generally go about digging up possible resources that your kids
> might be interested in for things they've expressed interest in, or
> thinking up ways they might enjoy expanding those interests. And
> how much do you leave up to them? Is this something that has varied
> over your years of unschooling with insight you have gained in the
> process of unschooling?
>
> ******You are your children's guide, but think about what a guide
> does. If you go to a museum and a guide takes you to the different
> displays he doesn't force you to look at each piece and study it and
> write a report. He simply points it out to you and allows you the
> freedom to put as much attention and effort into that piece as you
> choose. He doesn't tell you that he will show you the next piece if
> you say "please" or tell you that you don't get to see the next
> piece because you didn't say "thank you" when he showed you the
> prior piece. He doesn't tell you to be quiet and stay in a straight
> line with your hands at your side. He doesn't monitor you to see
> what you've learned and degrade you if you were not interested. He
> doesn't put conditions on sharing his knowledge. What he does do is
> share his joy (if he's a good guide) of the museum and trust you to
> take away what you will from the experience. That is the type of
> guide our children need and deserve. They need a guide that trusts
> them, respects them and is there to answer any questions they might
> have about this great world of ours.
>
> love, Valerie
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
>
>
>

Valerie

Hi Mike,

What are your children doing now? Are they staying home or in
daycare? If they're home now then things won't really change. The
children will be less overwhelming if they're home than if you have
to deal with what school would do to their personalities.

Your job is flexible. Can you be there when your wife can't be? Can
your mother-in-law help out during the months she's there? The kids
will be exposed to Bulgarian so they'll have great communication
with their grandmother.

Things usually seem overwhelming before they actually take place.
Once the unschooling starts (and maybe you're already unschooling?)
then things will fall into place and you'll work it all out.

Your children are lucky. They have three adults giving them love and
attention. I doubt negligence will ever enter the picture.

love, Valerie

--- In [email protected], "Michael P. Connor"
<mc@t...> wrote:
> Hi -
>
> We're exploring the possibility of unschooling for our children
(soon to be
> 5 and 3), but neither my wife nor I want to do it full time. My
wife, who
> works 30-40 hours/week in a highly responsible job, is less
enthusiastic
> about it than I am (I love the "unschooling" approach -- esp.
Valerie's
> "guide" description) and feels overwhelmed by the thought of it
most times.
> I love being with my daughters, but also enjoy working (as a
> trainer/consultant, I have more flexibility) at least part time.
My wife's
> mother (speaks Bulgarian, very little English) also spends most of
the year
> with us (Sept - May).
>
> Our other option is an alternative school (Waldorf, Montessori,
Sudbury
> Valley).
>
> Any thoughts about how we might make unschooling work without
feeling
> overwhelmed (or, somehow, negligent)?
>
> Thank you for any input.
>
> Mike
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Valerie" <valerie@u...>
> To: <[email protected]>
> Sent: Monday, June 07, 2004 1:15 PM
> Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Intro & Question
>
>
> >
> > > It could be that as a beginner I don't quite get the
philosophy of
> > many unschoolers - which is why I'm on this list, to increase my
> > understanding - but what I am wondering is what you or other more
> > experienced homeschoolers think of as your role in terms of
> > facilitating learning for your kid(s) and is that pretty much the
> > same for all unschoolers or does it differ. In other words, how
do
> > you generally go about digging up possible resources that your
kids
> > might be interested in for things they've expressed interest in,
or
> > thinking up ways they might enjoy expanding those interests. And
> > how much do you leave up to them? Is this something that has
varied
> > over your years of unschooling with insight you have gained in
the
> > process of unschooling?
> >
> > ******You are your children's guide, but think about what a guide
> > does. If you go to a museum and a guide takes you to the
different
> > displays he doesn't force you to look at each piece and study it
and
> > write a report. He simply points it out to you and allows you the
> > freedom to put as much attention and effort into that piece as
you
> > choose. He doesn't tell you that he will show you the next piece
if
> > you say "please" or tell you that you don't get to see the next
> > piece because you didn't say "thank you" when he showed you the
> > prior piece. He doesn't tell you to be quiet and stay in a
straight
> > line with your hands at your side. He doesn't monitor you to see
> > what you've learned and degrade you if you were not interested.
He
> > doesn't put conditions on sharing his knowledge. What he does do
is
> > share his joy (if he's a good guide) of the museum and trust you
to
> > take away what you will from the experience. That is the type of
> > guide our children need and deserve. They need a guide that
trusts
> > them, respects them and is there to answer any questions they
might
> > have about this great world of ours.
> >
> > love, Valerie
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > Yahoo! Groups Links
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >

Joan Labbe & Salvatore Genovese

Hi, Mike,

I am new to unschooling also with 5 and 3 yr olds of my own. I am just
wondering where you are located if you are considering Sudbury Valley - I'm
not sure if there are many other Sudbury Valley's out there, but I'm near
the one here in Framingham, MA. I also have considered SVS, happen to know
four families who send their kids to SVS and have had long conversations
with a local unschooling family here in Natick where the Dad was a former
teacher there and shared some insights on the school with me. I'd be happy
to share thoughts on SVS with you off list if you would find that helpful or
are looking for that at all...

Cheers,

Joan
salgenovese@...

-----Original Message-----
From: Michael P. Connor [mailto:mc@...]
Sent: Monday, June 07, 2004 6:01 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Intro & Question II


Hi -

We're exploring the possibility of unschooling for our children (soon to be
5 and 3), but neither my wife nor I want to do it full time. My wife, who
works 30-40 hours/week in a highly responsible job, is less enthusiastic
about it than I am (I love the "unschooling" approach -- esp. Valerie's
"guide" description) and feels overwhelmed by the thought of it most times.
I love being with my daughters, but also enjoy working (as a
trainer/consultant, I have more flexibility) at least part time. My wife's
mother (speaks Bulgarian, very little English) also spends most of the year
with us (Sept - May).

Our other option is an alternative school (Waldorf, Montessori, Sudbury
Valley).

Any thoughts about how we might make unschooling work without feeling
overwhelmed (or, somehow, negligent)?

Thank you for any input.

Mike

Michael P. Connor

Thank you, Valerie. I really appreciate your input -- and yes, my children
are lucky. Mike

----- Original Message -----
From: "Valerie" <valerie@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Monday, June 07, 2004 7:12 PM
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Intro & Question II


> Hi Mike,
>
> What are your children doing now? Are they staying home or in
> daycare? If they're home now then things won't really change. The
> children will be less overwhelming if they're home than if you have
> to deal with what school would do to their personalities.
>
> Your job is flexible. Can you be there when your wife can't be? Can
> your mother-in-law help out during the months she's there? The kids
> will be exposed to Bulgarian so they'll have great communication
> with their grandmother.
>
> Things usually seem overwhelming before they actually take place.
> Once the unschooling starts (and maybe you're already unschooling?)
> then things will fall into place and you'll work it all out.
>
> Your children are lucky. They have three adults giving them love and
> attention. I doubt negligence will ever enter the picture.
>
> love, Valerie
>
> --- In [email protected], "Michael P. Connor"
> <mc@t...> wrote:
> > Hi -
> >
> > We're exploring the possibility of unschooling for our children
> (soon to be
> > 5 and 3), but neither my wife nor I want to do it full time. My
> wife, who
> > works 30-40 hours/week in a highly responsible job, is less
> enthusiastic
> > about it than I am (I love the "unschooling" approach -- esp.
> Valerie's
> > "guide" description) and feels overwhelmed by the thought of it
> most times.
> > I love being with my daughters, but also enjoy working (as a
> > trainer/consultant, I have more flexibility) at least part time.
> My wife's
> > mother (speaks Bulgarian, very little English) also spends most of
> the year
> > with us (Sept - May).
> >
> > Our other option is an alternative school (Waldorf, Montessori,
> Sudbury
> > Valley).
> >
> > Any thoughts about how we might make unschooling work without
> feeling
> > overwhelmed (or, somehow, negligent)?
> >
> > Thank you for any input.
> >
> > Mike
> >
> > ----- Original Message -----
> > From: "Valerie" <valerie@u...>
> > To: <[email protected]>
> > Sent: Monday, June 07, 2004 1:15 PM
> > Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Re: Intro & Question
> >
> >
> > >
> > > > It could be that as a beginner I don't quite get the
> philosophy of
> > > many unschoolers - which is why I'm on this list, to increase my
> > > understanding - but what I am wondering is what you or other more
> > > experienced homeschoolers think of as your role in terms of
> > > facilitating learning for your kid(s) and is that pretty much the
> > > same for all unschoolers or does it differ. In other words, how
> do
> > > you generally go about digging up possible resources that your
> kids
> > > might be interested in for things they've expressed interest in,
> or
> > > thinking up ways they might enjoy expanding those interests. And
> > > how much do you leave up to them? Is this something that has
> varied
> > > over your years of unschooling with insight you have gained in
> the
> > > process of unschooling?
> > >
> > > ******You are your children's guide, but think about what a guide
> > > does. If you go to a museum and a guide takes you to the
> different
> > > displays he doesn't force you to look at each piece and study it
> and
> > > write a report. He simply points it out to you and allows you the
> > > freedom to put as much attention and effort into that piece as
> you
> > > choose. He doesn't tell you that he will show you the next piece
> if
> > > you say "please" or tell you that you don't get to see the next
> > > piece because you didn't say "thank you" when he showed you the
> > > prior piece. He doesn't tell you to be quiet and stay in a
> straight
> > > line with your hands at your side. He doesn't monitor you to see
> > > what you've learned and degrade you if you were not interested.
> He
> > > doesn't put conditions on sharing his knowledge. What he does do
> is
> > > share his joy (if he's a good guide) of the museum and trust you
> to
> > > take away what you will from the experience. That is the type of
> > > guide our children need and deserve. They need a guide that
> trusts
> > > them, respects them and is there to answer any questions they
> might
> > > have about this great world of ours.
> > >
> > > love, Valerie
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Yahoo! Groups Links
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
>
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
>
>
>