Ren Allen

~I'm sure if any RU'ers heard our house, they would be
uncomfortable, but it's not really from control, it's from everyone's
concern that things are fair for everyone.~

Controlling food for children is what leads to the idea of "fair" or
"not fair". Fair is that everybody gets the foods they want. A 2y.o.
doesn't need what a 16 y.o. needs and a child that really wants
chocolate right now doesn't need what the kid that wants broccoli is
asking for.
Sometimes one person needs/wants more of something than the other people.

If you aren't controlling portions or focusing so much on doling out
exact amounts that are "fair" it will all work out. If my children
are eating a lot of something, that's my cue to buy more, not start
portioning it.

Keep the foods they love well stocked, or make something similar. A
snack tray out all day is a great idea, but trying to portion
everything up to be "fair" doesn't work out so well in my opinion.

Ren
learninginfreedom.com

Ren Allen

~And it's interesting to me that you
mention unhealthy choices in the future: giving kids zero chance to
practice making choices now in my opinion generally leads to an
impaired ability (to varying degrees) to make good choices in the
future.~

Absolutely.
I think it's interesting to think that a parent that does not trust a
toddler will somehow miraculously learn to trust an 8 y.o.
Trust is something we learn because it's a good thing for all
relationships, not something we save for when the child MIGHT make
choices in line with our own philosophies.

Setting them up to make choices from day one, helps them learn their
own bodies and how to make the best choices for themselves for life.

Ren
learninginfreedom.com

drusila00

this is why my son has imput on the making of the grocery list I
always ask what he wants on the list, what he is feeling like and
then of course he goes to the store with me anyway.I just make sure
to buy a "reasonable ammount" of the things he has requested.

I find that if I know what he wants to eat that
1) it will get eaten and not hang arround getting old and nasty
(because some food he likes I can't stand and vice versa) &
2)that I can buy more of whatever it is he wants to eat and none of
whatever it is that might have been popular with him last month.
of course if I buy a reasonable ammount of somthing he requested and
its gone in a flash, its still gone and we will have to think of
what else to have next time but that is where creativity comes in at
our home!
Galen may want another yougurt after eating them all but if I
encourage him to think up somthing different or offer to help him
make a creamy jello salad he is happy to have that.

So he might have wanted one thing but when that thing is all gone
its time to get creative.

this also helps him to be able to define what is is about yougurt
that he wanted. (thuss to know himself better)
quick, cold, creamy... or did he want it because it was strawberry
flavor?



--- In [email protected], "Ren Allen"
<starsuncloud@...> wrote:
>
> ~I'm sure if any RU'ers heard our house, they would be
> uncomfortable, but it's not really from control, it's from
everyone's
> concern that things are fair for everyone.~
>
> Controlling food for children is what leads to the idea of "fair"
or
> "not fair". Fair is that everybody gets the foods they want. A
2y.o.
> doesn't need what a 16 y.o. needs and a child that really wants
> chocolate right now doesn't need what the kid that wants broccoli
is
> asking for.
> Sometimes one person needs/wants more of something than the other
people.
>
> If you aren't controlling portions or focusing so much on doling
out
> exact amounts that are "fair" it will all work out. If my children
> are eating a lot of something, that's my cue to buy more, not start
> portioning it.
>
> Keep the foods they love well stocked, or make something similar. A
> snack tray out all day is a great idea, but trying to portion
> everything up to be "fair" doesn't work out so well in my opinion.
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>

Melissa

Okay, the rest of the paragraph was important to discussion. We have
three kids with food allergies, one to corn products, two have celiac
disease, both potentially fatal. So when we talk about food that is
fair or not fair, we're discussing that Sam and Dan can only have
food with no wheat starch, gluten, germ, etc. So yes, it's fair that
Rachel and Emily eat the regular graham crackers, and leave the wheat
free ones for Sam and Dan. They are asking because they want to be
fair to their brothers, they want to ensure that they are not eating
the safe food.

People in our family get what they want to a certain extent. We work
very hard to provide alternatives to what is available to everyone
else. It does not have to do with controlling portions or exact
amounts, it has to do with not eating all the food that is safe for
the boys, or if Breanna can only have goldfish, it's really uncool to
eat all the goldfish, leaving only crackers and snacks with corn
starch and corn syrup. Hopefully that will make things more clear.

Some families go all wheat free, but honestly that will not work.
When the generic graham crackers are a dollar a box, the wheat-free
ones are approximately $12 for the same amount. So we buy a box of
wheat free for the boys, a box of corn free for Bre, and a couple of
boxes for everyone else.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (11), Breanna (8), Emily (7), Rachel (6), Sam (4), Dan
(2), and Avari Rose

share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma



On Jul 10, 2006, at 3:20 PM, Ren Allen wrote:

> ~I'm sure if any RU'ers heard our house, they would be
> uncomfortable, but it's not really from control, it's from everyone's
> concern that things are fair for everyone.~
>
> Controlling food for children is what leads to the idea of "fair" or
> "not fair". Fair is that everybody gets the foods they want. A 2y.o.
> doesn't need what a 16 y.o. needs and a child that really wants
> chocolate right now doesn't need what the kid that wants broccoli is
> asking for.
> Sometimes one person needs/wants more of something than the other
> people.
>
> If you aren't controlling portions or focusing so much on doling out
> exact amounts that are "fair" it will all work out. If my children
> are eating a lot of something, that's my cue to buy more, not start
> portioning it.
>
> Keep the foods they love well stocked, or make something similar. A
> snack tray out all day is a great idea, but trying to portion
> everything up to be "fair" doesn't work out so well in my opinion.
>
> Ren
> learninginfreedom.com
>
>
>



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Pamela Sorooshian

On Jul 10, 2006, at 2:23 PM, Melissa wrote:

> Okay, the rest of the paragraph was important to discussion. We have
> three kids with food allergies, one to corn products, two have celiac
> disease, both potentially fatal. So when we talk about food that is
> fair or not fair, we're discussing that Sam and Dan can only have
> food with no wheat starch, gluten, germ, etc. So yes, it's fair that
> Rachel and Emily eat the regular graham crackers, and leave the wheat
> free ones for Sam and Dan. They are asking because they want to be
> fair to their brothers, they want to ensure that they are not eating
> the safe food.

My oldest daughter and I are both allergic to dairy. So we get Rice
Dream instead of Ice Cream - for example. Some of the stuff we get is
REALLY good and everybody loves it - but it IS more expensive. I'd
rather get regular ice cream sandwiches for others and keep the
tofuti cuties for Roya and me AND I admit it can be annoying when I
open the freezer and it is full of ice cream, but the soy or rice-
based stuff is empty.

So - I get the issue.

The other members of our family realizes that if there is ice cream
and Rice Dream in the freezer - those of us with allergies will get
the short end of the stick if they eat the Rice Dream and leave the
ice cream. So they just won't do that to us. They might have a bit of
it, but they wouldn't clean us out. One of my other kids asked me to
get her one certain type of Rice Dream that she really likes. That's
fine - it is all a process - the goal is to be as considerate and
kind to each other as possible - not to get the most ice cream <G>.

Still - it might be useful to you to think of this in terms of
everybody "getting" what they need - rather than in terms of what is
"fair" -- that word, "fair," has a lot of baggage for most people.
Just a little perspective change....

-pam



Unschooling shirts, cups, bumper stickers, bags...
Live Love Learn
UNSCHOOL!
<http://www.cafepress.com/livelovelearn>





[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Melissa

a HA! I see. We're both coming at it similarly, I think, and
understanding. It's my vocabulary throwing everything off ;-)

So instead of fair, I will say we work together to make sure everyone
gets what they need. <hugs>

SO now back to making pizzas....and making sure everyone gets what
they want on their pizzas.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (11), Breanna (8), Emily (7), Rachel (6), Sam (4), Dan
(2), and Avari Rose

share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma



On Jul 10, 2006, at 4:38 PM, Pamela Sorooshian wrote:
>
> Still - it might be useful to you to think of this in terms of
> everybody "getting" what they need - rather than in terms of what is
> "fair" -- that word, "fair," has a lot of baggage for most people.
> Just a little perspective change....
>> .
>
>



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Ren Allen

~I just want my kids to have experience healthily choices.No they have
never had full freedom of eating me out of house and home.Believe me
my kids never go Hungary.Food is never withheld. I just have the kids
make healthily choices.~

It's not a true choice if you're deciding how it all works.
You can't "have them make" healthy choices, you can either let them
choose or not. Not much of a choice.

You say they never had full freedom of "eating me out of house and
home" and then you say they never go hungry. How would you KNOW that
for sure? If you're deciding they need to stop eating, how on earth
can they listen to their bodies? How can you possibly know for sure
that they aren't hungry sometimes (apparently they want more food than
you're willing to let them eat) or maybe eating when they aren't
hungry over fear of loss?

How can food never be withheld if you don't let them eat when they
choose? The above paragraph is full of contradictions.

It sounds like you're somehow projecting the cruddy job your Mum did
of exposing you to new foods and helping you get the foods you love,
onto our advice. Believing that my kids can eat what they want, when
they want it, does not mean I'm not offering healthy choices, making
wonderful foods and sharing cooking with them. We do.
Try not to connect your childhood to anything we are discussing, it's
two very different things and won't foster any understanding of RU
principles in regards to food.

Ren
learninginfreedom.com

Nicole Willoughby

SO now back to making pizzas....and making sure everyone gets what
they want on their pizzas.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Just curious ....what do you use for the gluten free crusts?

Nicole


---------------------------------
Do you Yahoo!?
Next-gen email? Have it all with the all-new Yahoo! Mail Beta.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Melissa

hehe....we usually just make a biscuit crust, using rice flour,
water, baking soda, xantham gum. Sometimes we buy the kinnikinnik
brand premade crusts. Today however, I cheated by buying a premade
cheese pizza from the health food store...and he added their favorite
toppings.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (11), Breanna (8), Emily (7), Rachel (6), Sam (4), Dan
(2), and Avari Rose

share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma



On Jul 10, 2006, at 8:56 PM, Nicole Willoughby wrote:

> SO now back to making pizzas....and making sure everyone gets what
> they want on their pizzas.
> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
>
> Just curious ....what do you use for the gluten free crusts?
>
> Nicole
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Do you Yahoo!?
> Next-gen email? Have it all with the all-new Yahoo! Mail Beta.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Nicole Willoughby

biscuit crust, using rice flour,
water, baking soda, xantham gum>>>>>>>>>

would you mind mailing me with how much of each?

my autistic little boy really does better wheat and preferably gluten free but premade stuff is incredibly expensive and just not in our budget. Plus we pretty much have to rely on foodstamps right now and I dont thing Mrs Robens and online places like that take them .

Right now his 2 big favorites are pizza and hamburgers ...or anything tasty stuffed in a bun

Nicole


---------------------------------
Talk is cheap. Use Yahoo! Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates starting at 1¢/min.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Melissa

2 cups rice flour
1 cup potato starch flour
1/2 cup tapioca starch
2 tbsp sugar
1 tbs xanthan gum
1 and 1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup nonfat dry milk
2 and 1/4 tsp dry yeast (1 package)
1 tsp unflavored gelatin
1 and 1/2 cup water
2 tbsp margarine or butter
1 tsp rice vinegar
3 lg eggs
(you can replace water with milk substitute and delete powdered milk
for GFCF, and use shortening)

combine dry ingredients
melt margarine in the water until water is 120 degrees
use electric mixer on low and slowly add the water/marg mix to the
dry ing.
Add vinegar and the eggs, one at a time. Beat at highest for three
minutes
spoon into greased tins about 1/3 full
you an use tart sized pie tins, but also a large muffin pan, or a
clean tuna fish can with the top and bottom removed is perfect!)
put into preheated oven, turn the oven off and let rise 30 minutes,
or doubled
turn the oven on to 375, bake for 25 minutes or til inserted
toothpick comes out clean.
remove and let cool on wire rack 10 minutes
remove from molds and cool completely. slice in half, and store in a
freezer ziplock for up to four months.
Melissa
Mom to Josh (11), Breanna (8), Emily (7), Rachel (6), Sam (4), Dan
(2), and Avari Rose

share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma



On Jul 11, 2006, at 12:21 AM, Nicole Willoughby wrote:.
>
>



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Melissa

sorry, meant to reply offlist. Obviously a crazy day here....but when
is it not?
Melissa
Mom to Josh (11), Breanna (8), Emily (7), Rachel (6), Sam (4), Dan
(2), and Avari Rose

share our lives at
http://360.yahoo.com/multimomma






[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Kiersten Pasciak

I know this is kind of OT, but people have been discussing nutrition
and special food circumstances, and preparing snacks within a
budget...

I know many people on the list are dealing with allergies and food
sensitivities. I have recently begun to eliminate gluten for myself
and have been reading many books and trying many recipes. I started
out with the rice flour, soy flour, tapioca flour, corn starch, guar
gum, garfava flour, sorgum flour, etc. I think it took me 19
ingredients to make the waffles the other day, LOL (though they were
fantastic)

I got a great book from the library called "The Gluten-Free Gourmet
Bakes Bread" which gives recipes for bulk mixes to make it easier to
prepare things quickly.

The neatest book I got, however, is called "Cooking wih Coconut
Flour". These recipes look just like wheat recipes (in that there
are no "extra" crazy, expensive ingredients in them. The amounts of
the ingredients are different, though, generally using many more
eggs. All the recipes are gluten free, soy free, trans fat free,
artificial sweetener free, and yeast free. Some can use stevia to
replace some of the sugar, if desired.

Thought I would put this out here for those in similar
circumstances, since there have been posts on wheat free stuff
recently.

Kiersten

Ren Allen

"One of the things I've been looking at recently is cholesterol and
how it becomes a problem (in and of itself it is not a problem - our
bodies make cholesterol and need -some- to be healthy)."

Yes, and there's a lot of evidence that points to an overly acidic
diet being the true problem. As we age, it's natural for our bodies to
make more cholesterol to some degree. For those that have too much
acid in the diet, it could be wearing away at the arteries and
therefore the body responds by protecting the arteries with cholesterol.
You don't see this buildup in vessels, but only arteries, where the
blood pressure is stronger. Hmmmm?

I worked in the health industry for many, many years, keeping up on
all the latest research and counseling people on how to make healthy
lifestyle changes (as membership director for more than one large
health club). What I learned at that time (and it could have changed)
is that diet only affects cholesterol levels by 11% roughly.
Not much.

I do wonder if any of the studies on diet and cholesterol levels ever
concluded that changing the diet to a more alkaline level, affected
cholesterol greater than the aforementioned 11% that was based on
cutting animal fats.

Anyhoo, animal fats are obviously not the main culprit. How else do
you explain the high fat diets of both the French and Greenlanders
with extremely low heart disease?

The whole point is, everyone will come to their own conclusions. I
just hope my children will inform themselves and continue to listen to
their own bodies.

Ren
learninginfreedom.com