Wondering
Tonya Matthews
Hi,
I'm new here. I've had my children him this year for the first time.
My oldest is 11 on the 30th, then my second will be 7 on June 9,
then the third child will be 3 on the 18th.
Firstly, I am SO shocked by the lack of support I've seen on this
group. I'm hoping I just walked in at a bad time! I belong to a
handful of homeschooling/unschooling/RU groups and I've found one
main thread throughout all. If you say something that COULD be
construed as 'negative', you get FLAMED. Some sites are definately
worse than others. I, honestly, hold back saying things on some
sites simply b/c I don't want to ripped apart. Either mildly or
violently. I've witnessed it on all sites. For real!
What is up?? Aren't we, as mothers, on a whole supposed to support
and nurture each other?? Ok, we'll have opposing opinions and maybe
need guidance but what's the deal with ATTACKING other women? I run
playgroups and our JOB is to gently try to help or provide
information to parents who need/ask for it. Women are opening up
themselves, in a time of need to ask for guidance and there are
responders who literally JUMP all over them. Where's the guidance?
Gentle nature? Warmly presented information?
As first time mom, I thought I knew IT ALL. And I had every single
one of my 'theories' tested by my son. I still am. I am learning
EVERY SINGLE day. Can we open our hearts to realize that we are all
on a journey and we are finding our way?
I hope I didn't go off on a tangent but people shouldn't be wary,
like me, to ask a question or to vent in fear that they will be
seriously criticized.
My .02,
Tonya
I'm new here. I've had my children him this year for the first time.
My oldest is 11 on the 30th, then my second will be 7 on June 9,
then the third child will be 3 on the 18th.
Firstly, I am SO shocked by the lack of support I've seen on this
group. I'm hoping I just walked in at a bad time! I belong to a
handful of homeschooling/unschooling/RU groups and I've found one
main thread throughout all. If you say something that COULD be
construed as 'negative', you get FLAMED. Some sites are definately
worse than others. I, honestly, hold back saying things on some
sites simply b/c I don't want to ripped apart. Either mildly or
violently. I've witnessed it on all sites. For real!
What is up?? Aren't we, as mothers, on a whole supposed to support
and nurture each other?? Ok, we'll have opposing opinions and maybe
need guidance but what's the deal with ATTACKING other women? I run
playgroups and our JOB is to gently try to help or provide
information to parents who need/ask for it. Women are opening up
themselves, in a time of need to ask for guidance and there are
responders who literally JUMP all over them. Where's the guidance?
Gentle nature? Warmly presented information?
As first time mom, I thought I knew IT ALL. And I had every single
one of my 'theories' tested by my son. I still am. I am learning
EVERY SINGLE day. Can we open our hearts to realize that we are all
on a journey and we are finding our way?
I hope I didn't go off on a tangent but people shouldn't be wary,
like me, to ask a question or to vent in fear that they will be
seriously criticized.
My .02,
Tonya
Ren Allen
"What is up?? Aren't we, as mothers, on a whole supposed to support
and nurture each other??"
I'm not here to support disrespect to children. I didn't start this
list to support anything and everything. I don't support spanking, I
don't support arbitrary limits I don't support ALL parenting styles.
Nope, nope, nope.
I think it's lame to expect that.
I think it's pretty bold to tell a group that was started for a
specific purpose, with a group of volunteers that donates time and
energy year after year, HOW they should run their group.
And now, this is officially in violation of list guidelines.
Meta-discussions are off limits. So let's get back to talking about
UNSCHOOLING please, rather than how lame the list is.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
and nurture each other??"
I'm not here to support disrespect to children. I didn't start this
list to support anything and everything. I don't support spanking, I
don't support arbitrary limits I don't support ALL parenting styles.
Nope, nope, nope.
I think it's lame to expect that.
I think it's pretty bold to tell a group that was started for a
specific purpose, with a group of volunteers that donates time and
energy year after year, HOW they should run their group.
And now, this is officially in violation of list guidelines.
Meta-discussions are off limits. So let's get back to talking about
UNSCHOOLING please, rather than how lame the list is.
Ren
learninginfreedom.com
Joyce Fetteroll
On May 14, 2006, at 12:47 PM, Tonya Matthews wrote:
blindsided by the approach of lists intended to provide discussion
and information about a particular subject.
If you're having problems and want to see what solutions to those
problems look like when filtered through unschooling and respect for
children, then ask away. :-) It's a very good list for people who are
looking for exactly that.
If you need a place to share what's going on in your life and offer
sympathy to other unschooling parents, there are other lists for that
type of connecting.
Different lists for different needs! Keeping trying lists out until
you find one that's a good fit for you. :-)
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> If you say something that COULD beWhen people assume lists are for support and sharing they get
> construed as 'negative', you get FLAMED.
blindsided by the approach of lists intended to provide discussion
and information about a particular subject.
If you're having problems and want to see what solutions to those
problems look like when filtered through unschooling and respect for
children, then ask away. :-) It's a very good list for people who are
looking for exactly that.
If you need a place to share what's going on in your life and offer
sympathy to other unschooling parents, there are other lists for that
type of connecting.
Different lists for different needs! Keeping trying lists out until
you find one that's a good fit for you. :-)
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 5/14/2006 12:18:03 P.M. Central Daylight Time,
godzilla.matthews@... writes:
What is up?? Aren't we, as mothers, on a whole supposed to support
and nurture each other?? Ok, we'll have opposing opinions and maybe
need guidance but what's the deal with ATTACKING other women? I run
playgroups and our JOB is to gently try to help or provide
information to parents who need/ask for it. Women are opening up
themselves, in a time of need to ask for guidance and there are
responders who literally JUMP all over them. Where's the guidance?
Gentle nature? Warmly presented information?
I normally would not respond to this. But most lists for unschooling ( not
sure about this list) but most are NOT support groups. They are there for
information. And yes your ways will be questioned and asked to be explained.
If you are a sensitive person these lists are not for you. They are not
meant as a personal attack on you or your parenting styles it is merly a way to
get to you to maybe look at it from a different way. To get you to see there
are other options maybe better options then the ones you presented. Most
people who are on these lists that you think are rude are there for that
interaction. They want to be questioned and asked why and how and what it will
accomplish. It is how we grow as parents and partners to our kids. Once again
if you go and read the mission statement for most of the groups it clearly
says these are NOT support groups. And that if you get easily offended then
these lists are probably not for you. But there are a lot of great groups that
ARE support groups if that is what you are looking for.
~Alyssa
Slightly crunchy, unschooling Mom to Landen(2 1/2) and Gage(7 months)
"Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, and
dance like you do when nobody's watching."
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
godzilla.matthews@... writes:
What is up?? Aren't we, as mothers, on a whole supposed to support
and nurture each other?? Ok, we'll have opposing opinions and maybe
need guidance but what's the deal with ATTACKING other women? I run
playgroups and our JOB is to gently try to help or provide
information to parents who need/ask for it. Women are opening up
themselves, in a time of need to ask for guidance and there are
responders who literally JUMP all over them. Where's the guidance?
Gentle nature? Warmly presented information?
I normally would not respond to this. But most lists for unschooling ( not
sure about this list) but most are NOT support groups. They are there for
information. And yes your ways will be questioned and asked to be explained.
If you are a sensitive person these lists are not for you. They are not
meant as a personal attack on you or your parenting styles it is merly a way to
get to you to maybe look at it from a different way. To get you to see there
are other options maybe better options then the ones you presented. Most
people who are on these lists that you think are rude are there for that
interaction. They want to be questioned and asked why and how and what it will
accomplish. It is how we grow as parents and partners to our kids. Once again
if you go and read the mission statement for most of the groups it clearly
says these are NOT support groups. And that if you get easily offended then
these lists are probably not for you. But there are a lot of great groups that
ARE support groups if that is what you are looking for.
~Alyssa
Slightly crunchy, unschooling Mom to Landen(2 1/2) and Gage(7 months)
"Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, and
dance like you do when nobody's watching."
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Lesa McMahon-Lowe
>>>Firstly, I am SO shocked by the lack of support I've seen on thisgroup. I'm hoping I just walked in at a bad time! I belong to a
handful of homeschooling/unschooling/RU groups and I've found one
main thread throughout all. If you say something that COULD be
construed as 'negative', you get FLAMED. Some sites are definately
worse than others. I, honestly, hold back saying things on some
sites simply b/c I don't want to ripped apart. Either mildly or
violently. I've witnessed it on all sites. For real!<<<
I don't see it as being flamed... I see passionate RUers who will
passionately support what goes into RU. I think those who are being
challenged feel challenged and threatened because their paradigm will either
have to change or they will just have to stay where they are. Change is
never easy...
>>>What is up?? Aren't we, as mothers, on a whole supposed to supportand nurture each other?? Ok, we'll have opposing opinions and maybe
need guidance but what's the deal with ATTACKING other women? I run
playgroups and our JOB is to gently try to help or provide
information to parents who need/ask for it. Women are opening up
themselves, in a time of need to ask for guidance and there are
responders who literally JUMP all over them. Where's the guidance?
Gentle nature? Warmly presented information?<<<
I've never seen an attack... I have seen those ideas that don't jive with RU
being passionately rebuked. If you come here seeking answers and guidance,
then you need to be open to the answers to your questions.
~*~*~
Lesa
LIFE Academy
http://lifeacademy.homeschooljournal.net
http://qtpiecraftsandthings.etsy.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]