Ren Allen

"You are going to CREATE malice and bullying and all kinds of other
negative character in her, if you persist in thinking of her that
way. You're totally wrong"

I totally agree with Pam.
Human beings are born altruistic...I believe that. I think we filter
children's behavior through the adult lense and it looks totally
different. A 2.5 y.o. does NOT have a whole bunch of ability for
empathy just yet. She will in her own time.
She wanted that baby OUT of her house and throwing the bottle was her
only form of communication!! When I read that I'm thinking
"malice????? NO, she just wants those people to LEAVE!"

She's sweet and perfect and whole and wonderful, exactly how she is
today. When she starts hitting, love the heck out of her, move her
away from the target and tell her how much you adore her and you can't
let her hurt anyone.

Your dh has been coercive with her, I'd hit him too!! Have him try
treating YOU the way he's been treating her and see if you don't feel
like smacking the guy.:)

She's very little. She doesn't have many tools just yet. LISTEN to her
and back off of playdates for a while....she's not going to do this
forever. Honest.

Ren
learninginfreedom.com