Joyce Fetteroll, making a clarification in a conversation that had become heated and defensive on both sides, February 2013 on facebook:

Here's something I wrote a bit ago on Unschooling Basics that might help. Every time this topic comes up the natural foodists assume the discussion is about how their beliefs are wrong. But it isn't. It's about how Mom can hold strong beliefs AND open the world to her kids so they feel free and supported in deciding what's right for them—even if it's counter to what mom believes. You've painted a picture of a mom with extreme convictions. Someone who believes that an aspect of mainstream society is toxic.

*What* that belief is doesn't matter. The belief could be war is evil. The belief could be school is bad. Let's say you believe school is toxic. Many people here would agree with you.

How can an unschooling mom hold the belief that school is toxic AND create an environment for her children to freely explore the world, including what the mom has rejected?

Would it be clear that no one here would suggest the mom *not* share why she's chosen to unschool if the kids asked?
Would it also be clear that people would discourage the mom from calling school toxic?
Would it be clear that the mom would be discouraged from giving her kids "articles/websites/books" that backed up her beliefs -- unless the kids were asking out of their own interest?
Would it be clear that if the kids wanted to try school that the mom would be encouraged to support the child's interest? And if the child decided school was fun, that the mom would be discouraged from diminishing her child's enthusiasm? Encouraged to allow the child to discover what they liked and didn't like for themselves? Supported in answering her child's questions about why she didn't like school but discouraged from sharing in a way that made her child feel bad or wrong for having different feelings?

Vegan unschooling moms can help their kids explore eating meat without hiding who they are AND without making their kids feel uncomfortable exploring different beliefs. Peacenik unschooling moms can help their kids explore war and the possibility of joining the army AND without kids feeling mom thinks less of them for liking something mom dislikes.

4:44am Feb 4 (2013)
*** But you would not feed your children windshield wiper fluid because its a pretty blue hue and they want it, would you? ***

Are other kids happily drinking windshield washer fluid?

*That's* the difference. Your kids will see others around them freely, happily exploring foods that contain blue dye. And people around them aren't panicking and rushing them to the hospital.

Can you see how confusing the word "poison" would be if you call poison poison AND some food that people all around them are eating also poison? Can you see how a child might think you're a bit clueless and overreactive? Or maybe that pretty blue fluid can be drunk just like the other "poisons"?

The people around them are free to decide if they want to eat that food this time. The are free to decide based on *their own* criteria if that food is what they want to eat. When they're young their criteria will be different *because they're different people*. When they're older, their criteria will change.

You're trying to stack the deck so that your beliefs drown out anything else they might want to explore.

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Eating Poison (about how limits on candy make pills and laundry pods look better)

Logic Clarity Misconceptions about Unschooling "The Full Plate Club"

"Violence" in games and stories Peaceful Kids with Toy Guns