rules/principles (was Change and growth)
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<< <<<<I am not above using the fact that other children are rule-bound and
brainwashed by saying something along the lines of "respecting the house
rules" - even though we don't actually have any! >>>>
<<A whole different state of mind, and way of communicating with others. >>
Yesterday I came up with a rule (in retrospect). Holly aimed a toy gun at me
and fired it, and I said, "I don't like that at all, Holly." She asked why,
and I said it was always the rule that you could only shoot at someone who was
also playing. Then I realized she was never a gun-playing little kid, and
that it had been fifteen years ago since that rule was in effect. "Same as
boffers," I said. "You don't hit someone who's not also holding a boffer."
Well that's just common sense, isn't it? <g>
It was the same as the principle (couldn't have been a rule, but it was
discussed when applicable) that it's only playing if everyone's playing. As soon
as someone's not having fun anymore (feelings are hurt, wants to quit for any
reason) the other person can't say "I was only playing."
If the other person isn't engaged in the game (whether boffers, toy guns,
water play, wrestling, teasing) then he's not fair game.
Sandra
brainwashed by saying something along the lines of "respecting the house
rules" - even though we don't actually have any! >>>>
<<A whole different state of mind, and way of communicating with others. >>
Yesterday I came up with a rule (in retrospect). Holly aimed a toy gun at me
and fired it, and I said, "I don't like that at all, Holly." She asked why,
and I said it was always the rule that you could only shoot at someone who was
also playing. Then I realized she was never a gun-playing little kid, and
that it had been fifteen years ago since that rule was in effect. "Same as
boffers," I said. "You don't hit someone who's not also holding a boffer."
Well that's just common sense, isn't it? <g>
It was the same as the principle (couldn't have been a rule, but it was
discussed when applicable) that it's only playing if everyone's playing. As soon
as someone's not having fun anymore (feelings are hurt, wants to quit for any
reason) the other person can't say "I was only playing."
If the other person isn't engaged in the game (whether boffers, toy guns,
water play, wrestling, teasing) then he's not fair game.
Sandra