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When my third son wanted to go to school I told him we'd "do school" at home
first to see if it was what he really wanted.
I got out some workbooks and had him sit at the table. He started to get up
and I asked what he was doing and he said he needed a drink. I told him he
would have to wait three more hours, until lunch. So he sat back down. Then he
started to get up again and I asked what he was doing. He said he had to go to
the bathroom. I told him he'd have to sit down and wait his turn, because there
was already one child in the bathroom. This lasted about 15 min. and no one
has ever asked to go to school again.
I think school is horrid. I think it's a place set up to provide day care
for a lot of kids and teach our children to roam in herds, not to be individuals.
My kids started equating college with regular PS , so we sat down and talked
about that. I told them that they will get a lot more out of college (if they
decide to go) than a lot of people. They won't go with the expectations thrown
on them that they have to get a degree, not only that but they have to be a
Dr., a lawyer, a whatever. My kids are putting some of their money into
savings, plus they get savings bonds for their b-days. Right now none of them want to
go to college and two of my boys want to use the money to open a business and
my oldest wants to travel the world. Most of the family is OK with this. The
one who isn't, is a grandpa who was a college Prof, but he's coming around.

Karena


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Kristi

I've considered doing this with my daughter, 4.5, and I've heard of
lots of parents who have taken this approach. In the end, I decided
it's too manipulative and have taken a different approach with her --
we'll try homeschooling for a while and if she doesn't like it and
still wants to try public school after a few years she can go (she has
put the number 16 on this -- "Like when I'm 16?").

She wants to go to school because her friends do. Because she could
ride the bus. Because it looks and sounds like fun. Because teachers
on TV are usually awful nice (and in real life that's true, too).
Because in books and TV you see the fun interactions kids have in a
classroom and in the cafeteria. And frankly, school can be fun.
There's a lot about it that I object to as a parent, and a lot she may
or may not dislike. As a mom I've decided she's too young to make
that decision yet, and I hate telling her know. But to sit her at the
table and say "This is what school is like ... oh you don't like it?
OK" in order to get her to say no seems like lying, because in truth,
she might find the negative things coupled with the positives not to
matter as much. To draw a parallel, I dislike cutting clothing out of
patterns. I dislike the entire process. But I really enjoy sewing
and creating clothing for the kids, and I especially enjoy
embellishing them, so I start with the patterns and also do the fuss
work with hems and the like, because I enjoy it enough to make it
worth it. She might like school enough that waiting for the bathroom
isn't so bad. And until she gets to experience it, she'll probably
feel like she's missing out, at least until we build a stronger
homeschooling network (we're working on it!). But if I'm brainwashing
and manipulating her, IMO, I'm not doing her any better service than
the schools I'm keeping her from. Does anybody have another angle on
this? I'm always glad to read about this topic as it's one we often
struggle with in our home.

Kristi

> When my third son wanted to go to school I told him we'd "do school"
at home
> first to see if it was what he really wanted.
> I got out some workbooks and had him sit at the table. He started to
get up
> and I asked what he was doing and he said he needed a drink. I told
him he
> would have to wait three more hours, until lunch. So he sat back
down. Then he
> started to get up again and I asked what he was doing. He said he
had to go to
> the bathroom. I told him he'd have to sit down and wait his turn,
because there
> was already one child in the bathroom. This lasted about 15 min. and
no one
> has ever asked to go to school again.