Kristi

One of my best friends has 3 children -- one just turned seven and
is finishing first grade, another age 4 in preschool, and a 2-yr
old. Although our 4-yr old girls are almost exactly the same age,
they have never really been friends and Morgaine plays better with
the older girl. She was thrilled when the older girl invited her to
a campfire birthday party with all her school friends ... well when
we got there, Morgaine started playing with her new toys and the
older girl said, "You can't play with those! I took them out for me
and my friends to play!" Without thinking I jumped in as Morgaine's
face crumpled ... "You invited Morgaine to your party Liv. She is
your friend." "No, I invited her so my sister could have someone to
play with." Morgaine was crushed and I was angry and sad, but I
backed off and let things alone. I gave her the option to stay by
herself (as planned), for me to stay with her, or to come home.
When she settled down she decided to stay by herself.

I was a little nervous when I picked her up -- it was her first drop-
off party and hadn't started well -- but she had a great time. She
had made friends with one of the other girls and also gone into the
house with my friend's other daughter for a while. She was filthy
and full and so proud of herself. I had left her there in such
frustration, because as my friends' children have gone off to public
school it's mostly the moms who create that "ageism," and it has
hurt Morgaine time and again to be excluded by her older friends,
but she worked it out. Next time I'll try to stay out of it
altogether.

Oh, also when the other 4-yr old girl challenged her -- "You still a
baaa-by. I a big girl; I go to school," Morgaine shot back, "No,
that's because I go to homeschool and I get to learn all the time."
It's the first time I've heard her not sound defensive about not
being in school. Step by step we're getting there.

Thanks for letting me share. This was such a big event for us
both ...

Kristi