Dia Garland

I have never liked nicknames, and have never shortened my kids names to
anything. Probably stems from being called "Dia Pia Diahrreah" throughout
elementary school!

Dia

[email protected]

Hahah, these sure take me back. I still get Miss Priss from tons of people,
Priss Pants was a standard as a child, and Priscilla Gorilla was a favorite
of lots of my peers. There are times I don't thank my parents for this name
:) (Actually I'm pretty fond of it now, notwithstanding the
nicknames...especially since my marriage. Priscilla Adams has a lovely
Mayflowerish ring to it)

Priss

In a message dated 6/25/00 8:54:40 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:

> *AARRGGHHH*, when I was little my nickname was *Missy Prissy* and *Prissy
> Pants* ... *ACK*, I LOATHED BOTH names but too bad for me b/c both fit me
> *PERFECTLY*!!! nowdays, I just go by Pris, Priscilla is just TOO LONG to
> say and type; bascially lazy, don't you know ... my fm gets a big kick out
> of it when they hear my mother or sisters use those names;
> ***UHHHhhhhhhHOOOOOOoooooo MISSSYYYYYYY PRISSYYYYYYYYYY*** ... ***hey ya
> PRISSY PANTS*** ... of course then they'd BETTER START RUNNING!!! haha

Mary Bianco

>From: "Myranda" <myrandab@...>

<<I see that, but it is not the case with us. Nicknames are not labels
unless used as such. Just because you call someone "sweetie" doesn't mean
that they are always sweet, does it? It's just a nice, friendly, nickname.
Ugh, and I said I wouldn't say anything else on this subject!


I don't think there is anything wrong with nicknames except for the fact of
what they are. We call the kids things like munchkin, punkin and meepy.
Things that have no real meaning except sounding cute or coming to mind. Not
hurtful in my eyes or anyone else's. Would anyone here resent being called a
punkin? Okay wait, maybe if you are very large and wearing an orange
outfit.....but then I wouldn't do that.

The point is, what can label and become true. I remember when my godfather
was dying and in a home. The guy across the hall would yell constantly,
couldn't make out what he was saying, just yelling. Someone made the remark
to my godfather that it was annoying but he must be use to it. My godfather
said, "If you hang long enough, you get use to that too!"

I always remember that for a lot of things in daily life. Think the child
will lie all the time and they will. Think they are losers and they will be.
They are labels that can ring true.

Calling a kid a sweetie pie can't actually make them a sweetie pie, or a
punkin, or a nut. It's an expression that generally pops up with no intent
to hurt and I don't think it does. But things that can come true, even
without the intent to hurt, still will. Like chubby, lazy, shy or
hyperactive.

I feel like this post is as clear as mud as to what I wanted to say. I
started out with it all nice in my head. I'm not sure if it came out that
way!!!

Mary B

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Myranda

I think I understand what you're saying.
Myranda
I don't think there is anything wrong with nicknames except for the fact of
what they are. We call the kids things like munchkin, punkin and meepy.
Things that have no real meaning except sounding cute or coming to mind. Not
hurtful in my eyes or anyone else's. Would anyone here resent being called a
punkin? Okay wait, maybe if you are very large and wearing an orange
outfit.....but then I wouldn't do that.

The point is, what can label and become true. I remember when my godfather
was dying and in a home. The guy across the hall would yell constantly,
couldn't make out what he was saying, just yelling. Someone made the remark
to my godfather that it was annoying but he must be use to it. My godfather
said, "If you hang long enough, you get use to that too!"

I always remember that for a lot of things in daily life. Think the child
will lie all the time and they will. Think they are losers and they will be.
They are labels that can ring true.

Calling a kid a sweetie pie can't actually make them a sweetie pie, or a
punkin, or a nut. It's an expression that generally pops up with no intent
to hurt and I don't think it does. But things that can come true, even
without the intent to hurt, still will. Like chubby, lazy, shy or
hyperactive.

I feel like this post is as clear as mud as to what I wanted to say. I
started out with it all nice in my head. I'm not sure if it came out that
way!!!

Mary B

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Join the world's largest e-mail service with MSN Hotmail.
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Nora or Devereaux Cannon

I'm hopelessly behind on e-mail, courtesy of the Army's ever
changing moving plans being blown out to sea with the last
hurricane and a sudden up-tick in either language arts or cuddle
time, AKA "Mom, can we read all of a different book by Dahl every
day for a while" ... but the nickname debate just caught my eye
and is an easy one to get down. Our son is permanently and
hopelessly Urchin - and IRL we have caught some grief over that.

BBBBBUUUUTTTT - there is a story!!!

15 or so years ago we were at a reenactment, camping with about 6
or 7 other compatible families. The kids were in the 5-12 age
range, big enough to be allowed to stay up at the campfire when
the adults were ready to lie down. And we did and they did. Our
family had done the Riddle of the Sphinx in the car on the way
down; the kids decided to create an "Ages of Kids" replica. I
heard bits and pieces as I drifted off and got the full taxonomy
the next day, the features, milestones, and purposes of each age.
The Urch was almost 9, a "chilford" according to their labels.
The next and very desirable stage of childhood was to become an
Urchin, starting at about age 10. At about 10, these young
philosophers decided a reasonably well raised child could survive
on his own, as in become a street urchin successfully, if they so
desired. He very much wanted to reach that exalted status of
self sufficiency, without regard to how realistic the assessment
was. He stuck with that desire for the next 14 months, with all
kinds of effort into learning the ways of taking care of
yourself.

When he turned 10, I made him a certificate congratulating him on
becoming an Urchin. He was pleased as punch, and insisted that
we call him Urchin. The fact that his given name is an old
family one that is not susceptible to good shortening as a
nickname may have colored the request. Nonetheless his nickname
of Urchin or The Urch stands as a comfortable example of our own
family reality, however at odds it may be with what a dictionary
would indicate the meaning would be.

....none of which expresses any view on whether a particular
nickname or label in another particular context may or may not
reflect unstated negative opinions or unintentionally damaging
images. For us, one that most would find inappropriate is in
fact a joyous inside joke.

...OK lots of tougher or more thoughtful ones to write, but the 6
wants to search for movies based on Dahl books, beyond Willie
Wonka. I'm gonna go fiddle with the pumpernickel dough and see
how far she gets before she needs help. My observation is that
she gets a lot further if I'm not too close, more willing to make
mistakes and go down blind alleys. I swear that I don't correct
her errors unless she asks me to, I really don't; I really don't;
I really don't - do I?

----- Original Message -----
From: "Mary Bianco" <mummyone24@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Wednesday, October 09, 2002 1:36 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] nicknames


| >From: "Myranda" <myrandab@...>
|
| <<I see that, but it is not the case with us. Nicknames are not
labels
| unless used as such. Just because you call someone "sweetie"
doesn't mean
| that they are always sweet, does it? It's just a nice,
friendly, nickname.
| Ugh, and I said I wouldn't say anything else on this subject!
|
|
| I don't think there is anything wrong with nicknames except for
the fact of
| what they are. We call the kids things like munchkin, punkin
and meepy.
| Things that have no real meaning except sounding cute or coming
to mind. Not
| hurtful in my eyes or anyone else's. Would anyone here resent
being called a
| punkin? Okay wait, maybe if you are very large and wearing an
orange
| outfit.....but then I wouldn't do that.
|

margotapple

Mary wrote:

> to my godfather that it was annoying but he must be use to it. My
godfather
> said, "If you hang long enough, you get use to that too!"
>
> I always remember that for a lot of things in daily life. Think the
child
> will lie all the time and they will. Think they are losers and they
will be.
> They are labels that can ring true.
>
> Calling a kid a sweetie pie can't actually make them a sweetie pie,
or a
> punkin, or a nut. It's an expression that generally pops up with no
intent
> to hurt and I don't think it does. But things that can come true,
even
> without the intent to hurt, still will. Like chubby, lazy, shy or
> hyperactive.
>
> I feel like this post is as clear as mud as to what I wanted to say.
I
> started out with it all nice in my head. I'm not sure if it came out
that
> way!!!
>
> Mary B


It came out clear as a bell to me. Experience and common sense tell us
that words that sound bad or ugly or mean to others are not the best
nick names to give our children. Duh.

Maybe it should be in the manual? You know the manual that should come
with children when they are born but doesn't so they are stuck with us
and our poor pitiful attempts to treat them right based on our own
less than wonderful experiences in life?

Why not nickname a little one Respected? That would be a new one
wouldn't it?

Peggy

Mary Bianco

>From: "Myranda" <myrandab@...>

<<I think I understand what you're saying.>>



LOL!!!! Good, because at the end there, I wasn't sure I even knew what I was
trying to say!!

Mary B

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Alan & Brenda Leonard

> Calling a kid a sweetie pie can't actually make them a sweetie pie, or a
> punkin, or a nut. It's an expression that generally pops up with no intent
> to hurt and I don't think it does. But things that can come true, even
> without the intent to hurt, still will. Like chubby, lazy, shy or
> hyperactive.

I certainly hope my son's nickname won't "come true"; he's been my bunny-boy
since he was a baby! <g> I think that this is a touchy issue for peole.
Sandra noted that she calls her daughter by her name, Holly. Not everyone
goes for nicknames. That's fair.

Mary B. wrote the above. I have issues with punkin, which didn't sound
hurtful to her. To me, it means little punk, and I never liked being called
a punk as a child. I didn't even like being called a kid (those are baby
goats!). But those are MY issues, not Mary's. She's welcome to call her
kids punkin if she likes!

What seriously bothers one person doesn't faze someone else. It's possible
that Myranda might later want to rethink her nicknames, based on some
people's comments. But as she said, she's happy to stop if her son ever
lets her know he'd like her to. To me, that's the issue. Sandra's mom
calling her sister a cow obvioulsy wasn't appreciated. If her sister
laughed and said, "Moo, moo" back to their Mom, it would be a whole
different story. But if she asked her to stop and she didn't, that shows a
basic lack of respect. I think a big piece of unschooling is that we treat
our children (and everyone else, too) with respect.

At any rate, I'm outa here tomorrow for a couple days! Wish I was joining
all the conference goers, but I'm heading to Leipzig. It's a lot closer,
for me at least! Have fun in S.C.!

brenda

Myranda

Have a good, and safe, trip!!!!
Myranda
<snip> At any rate, I'm outa here tomorrow for a couple days! Wish I was joining
all the conference goers, but I'm heading to Leipzig. It's a lot closer,
for me at least! Have fun in S.C.!

brenda




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Mary Bianco

>From: Alan & Brenda Leonard <abtleo@...>

<<Mary B. wrote the above. I have issues with punkin, which didn't sound
hurtful to her. To me, it means little punk, and I never liked being called
a punk as a child. I didn't even like being called a kid (those are baby
goats!). But those are MY issues, not Mary's. She's welcome to call her
kids punkin if she likes!>>

Just to clarify, which doesn't take away what Brenda is saying her feeling
about punk is. My dad always called me pumpkin but said it like punkin even
though he meant the other. He would write it that way too. It never bothered
me, what's so bad about being a pumpkin? And even though sometimes he did
say punk, I knew I wasn't a punk but a punkin! It just stuck with me and my
kids. Now if I was always called a punk with no understanding of the other,
that would have bothered me too.

Mary B


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The Slackermom

On Wed, 9 Oct 2002 14:15:03 -0500 "Nora or Devereaux Cannon"
<dcannon@...> writes:
> ...OK lots of tougher or more thoughtful ones to write, but the 6
> wants to search for movies based on Dahl books, beyond Willie
> Wonka.

We thought Matilda was quite good and The Witches was quite bad, they
changed the whole story.

Dar

debi watson

Matilda is a great favorite around here! James and the Giant Peach wasn't entirely accurate, either. The BFG had the kids giggling though. Debi

> wants to search for movies based on Dahl books, beyond Willie
> Wonka.

We thought Matilda was quite good and The Witches was quite bad, they
changed the whole story.




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Kelli Traaseth

Is there a BFG movie? We were just going to read it.
Kelli
debi watson wrote:Matilda is a great favorite around here! James and the Giant Peach wasn't entirely accurate, either. The BFG had the kids giggling though. Debi

> wants to search for movies based on Dahl books, beyond Willie
> Wonka.

We thought Matilda was quite good and The Witches was quite bad, they
changed the whole story.




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Alan & Brenda Leonard

> My dad always called me pumpkin but said it like punkin even
> though he meant the other. He would write it that way too. It never bothered
> me, what's so bad about being a pumpkin?

Now, Mary, I have to laugh at that one.

I would never call my son a pumpkin, either, for fear the name would stick.
He's got the brightest red-orange hair you'd ever want to see, which is of
course quite pumpkin-y.

With Halloween coming, Tim's red hair reminded me of one year when Tim was
very small. I have brown hair. My dh has very little hair (due to the army
haircut and also just plain due to the army!). People constantly ask where
Tim got his red hair. Genetics, I guess. Nobody we know has that color
hair, in or out of the family. Anyway, for Halloween that year I sprayed my
hair the most obnoxious shade of orange I could find. Many people didn't
get it, but my friends laughed and laughed and laughed.

brenda

Joseph Fuerst

My youngest guy, Simon, will be two on October 31. I have often referred
to him as my li'l punkin' (i.e., pumpkin) because of his birthday.

> > My dad always called me pumpkin but said it like punkin even
> > though he meant the other. He would write it that way too. It never
bothered
> > me, what's so bad about being a pumpkin?
>
> Now, Mary, I have to laugh at that one.
>
> I would never call my son a pumpkin, either, for fear the name would
stick.
> He's got the brightest red-orange hair you'd ever want to see, which is of
> course quite pumpkin-y.
>
> With Halloween coming, Tim's red hair reminded me of one year when Tim was
> very small. I have brown hair. My dh has very little hair (due to the
army
> haircut and also just plain due to the army!). People constantly ask
where
> Tim got his red hair. Genetics, I guess. Nobody we know has that color
> hair, in or out of the family. Anyway, for Halloween that year I sprayed
my
> hair the most obnoxious shade of orange I could find. Many people didn't
> get it, but my friends laughed and laughed and laughed.
>
> brenda
>
>
>
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>
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>
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>
>
>

Kelli Traaseth

Brenda,
This is great!! I always wanted a red headed child, but didn't get one. Lots of red hair in our family, but I'm just a brunette. Maybe I'll color my hair red with a washable color just to see what it looks like?
Gee what a thought, not like anyone on this list has ever colored their hair <g>.
Take Care,
Kelli
Alan & Brenda Leonard <abtleo@...> wrote:> My dad always called me pumpkin but said it like punkin even
> though he meant the other. He would write it that way too. It never bothered
> me, what's so bad about being a pumpkin?

Now, Mary, I have to laugh at that one.

I would never call my son a pumpkin, either, for fear the name would stick.
He's got the brightest red-orange hair you'd ever want to see, which is of
course quite pumpkin-y.

With Halloween coming, Tim's red hair reminded me of one year when Tim was
very small. I have brown hair. My dh has very little hair (due to the army
haircut and also just plain due to the army!). People constantly ask where
Tim got his red hair. Genetics, I guess. Nobody we know has that color
hair, in or out of the family. Anyway, for Halloween that year I sprayed my
hair the most obnoxious shade of orange I could find. Many people didn't
get it, but my friends laughed and laughed and laughed.

brenda


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Kelli Traaseth

Sorry, forgot subject change, again.
Kelli
Kelli Traaseth <kellitraas@...> wrote:
Brenda,
This is great!! I always wanted a red headed child, but didn't get one. Lots of red hair in our family, but I'm just a brunette. Maybe I'll color my hair red with a washable color just to see what it looks like?
Gee what a thought, not like anyone on this list has ever colored their hair <g>.
Take Care,
Kelli
Alan & Brenda Leonard <abtleo@...> wrote:> My dad always called me pumpkin but said it like punkin even
> though he meant the other. He would write it that way too. It never bothered
> me, what's so bad about being a pumpkin?

Now, Mary, I have to laugh at that one.

I would never call my son a pumpkin, either, for fear the name would stick.
He's got the brightest red-orange hair you'd ever want to see, which is of
course quite pumpkin-y.

With Halloween coming, Tim's red hair reminded me of one year when Tim was
very small. I have brown hair. My dh has very little hair (due to the army
haircut and also just plain due to the army!). People constantly ask where
Tim got his red hair. Genetics, I guess. Nobody we know has that color
hair, in or out of the family. Anyway, for Halloween that year I sprayed my
hair the most obnoxious shade of orange I could find. Many people didn't
get it, but my friends laughed and laughed and laughed.

brenda


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Rachel Ann

I always wanted to be a red head! And would love a red haired child...esp. a girl. with near black eyes.....

Sometime after I had met my mil, but before I knew her well, I mentioned to her that I was jealous of her hair. I always wanted red hair. She told me the name on the bottle! LOL I COULDN'T TELLL. I was so embarrassed.

be well,
Rachel Ann
-----

Brenda,
This is great!! I always wanted a red headed child, but didn't get one. Lots of red hair in our family, but I'm just a brunette. Maybe I'll color my hair red with a washable color just to see what it looks like?
Gee what a thought, not like anyone on this list has ever colored their hair <g>.
Take Care,
Kelli


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Kelli Traaseth

Hi Rachel Ann,
Maybe I'll give it a try, I have just stopped coloring it to cover gray, so I could go with something different than my natural gray streaks. Although I'm feeling rather comfortable right now with my graying hair. This has been a growing (emotional) thing to let my hair go, I started graying right after college.
Rachel, I don't think I've ever told you how I enjoy your posts, right from the beginning when you were talking about your cooking. I have always loved hearing about Jewish customs and traditions, so interesting, I'm a bit jealous.
Take Care,
Kelli
Rachel Ann <hindar@...> wrote:I always wanted to be a red head! And would love a red haired child...esp. a girl. with near black eyes.....

Sometime after I had met my mil, but before I knew her well, I mentioned to her that I was jealous of her hair. I always wanted red hair. She told me the name on the bottle! LOL I COULDN'T TELLL. I was so embarrassed.

be well,
Rachel Ann
-----

Brenda,
This is great!! I always wanted a red headed child, but didn't get one. Lots of red hair in our family, but I'm just a brunette. Maybe I'll color my hair red with a washable color just to see what it looks like?
Gee what a thought, not like anyone on this list has ever colored their hair <g>.
Take Care,
Kelli


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]


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Todd M.

At 11:04 PM 10/9/02 -0600, you wrote:

>The BFG had the kids giggling though. Debi
==
What' "BFG" ?

Todd
------
You're just jealous because the voices are talking to ME! <g>
http://rambleman.tripod.com/index.html