Certificate of Empowerment (was Perfectionism...)
[email protected]
In a message dated 5/11/04 12:55:33 AM, tri_mom@... writes:
<< . I was a terrible
perfectionist - blamed it on my parents who did expect a lot from us
(straight A's and all that). But now I see that my kids are often
perfectionists, even though they don't have any of that pressure from
parents or schools. So I've come to believe that a lot of
perfectionism is just personality. On the other hand, there's a lot
of things that I didn't know as a perfectionist child that I've
learned along the way as an adult. >>
The first time I was going to speak at a conference (something local to me),
I wanted a handout. Other unschoolers helped me edit my rough outline up,
and though I thought I would only use it that weekend, it stuck.
That was in March, 1996, and I'm still passing them out. The text is below,
but a few weeks ago someone wrote to me wanting to discuss a detail of it
and I'd love to do that, but the e-mail fell out of the mailbox in the flood of
e-mail while I was out of town.
The intent was to give new homeschoolers permission they didn't feel they
had. Here's the text, and it's online at http://SandraDodd.com/empowerment
CERTIFICATE OF EMPOWERMENT
As bearer of this certificate you are no longer required to depend on the
advice of experts. You may step back and view the entire world-not just your
home, neighborhood or town, but the whole Earth-as a learning experience, a
laboratory containing languages (and native speakers thereof), plants, animals,
history, geology, weather (real live weather, in the sky, not in a book), music,
art , mathematics, physics, engineering, foods, human dynamics, and ideas
without end. Although collections of these treasures have been located in museums
for your convenience, they are to be found everywhere else, too.
This authorizes you to experiment; to trust and enjoy your kids; to rejoice
when your children surpass you in skill, knowledge or wisdom; to make mistakes,
and to say "I don't know." Furthermore, you may allow your children to
experience boredom without taking full responsibility for finding them something to
do.
Henceforth you shall neither be required nor expected to finish everything
you start. Projects, books, experiments and plans may be discontinued as soon as
something more interesting comes along (or for any other reason) without
penalty, and picked up again at any time in the future (or never).
You may reclaim control of your family's daily life, and take what steps you
feel necessary to protect your children from physical, emotional or social
harm.
You have leave to think your own thoughts, and to encourage your children to
think theirs.
Each person who reads and understands this is authorized to extend these
privileges to others, by reproducing and distributing this certificate or by
creating another of his/her own design. Those who don't feel the need to obtain
approval to experiment, to think, or to do things they've never seen others do
are exempt, as they didn't need permission in the first place.
Sandra Dodd
------
It has been published in homeschooling newsletters and borrowed and changed a
big on a couple of other websites. Once, interestingly, all that was added
was "and libraries" after the "in museums" part and I found it really bothered
me. Another time it was quite rewritten for a medical self-help/recovery site.
Anyway, even though I have hundreds printed for the upcoming conferences and
I can't change it at this point, I'm willing to discuss that
question/criticism if the person's still around.
AND, I was wondering if anyone saved a copy of the anti-version that was made
up by unschooling detractors years ago on AOL.
Sandra
<< . I was a terrible
perfectionist - blamed it on my parents who did expect a lot from us
(straight A's and all that). But now I see that my kids are often
perfectionists, even though they don't have any of that pressure from
parents or schools. So I've come to believe that a lot of
perfectionism is just personality. On the other hand, there's a lot
of things that I didn't know as a perfectionist child that I've
learned along the way as an adult. >>
The first time I was going to speak at a conference (something local to me),
I wanted a handout. Other unschoolers helped me edit my rough outline up,
and though I thought I would only use it that weekend, it stuck.
That was in March, 1996, and I'm still passing them out. The text is below,
but a few weeks ago someone wrote to me wanting to discuss a detail of it
and I'd love to do that, but the e-mail fell out of the mailbox in the flood of
e-mail while I was out of town.
The intent was to give new homeschoolers permission they didn't feel they
had. Here's the text, and it's online at http://SandraDodd.com/empowerment
CERTIFICATE OF EMPOWERMENT
As bearer of this certificate you are no longer required to depend on the
advice of experts. You may step back and view the entire world-not just your
home, neighborhood or town, but the whole Earth-as a learning experience, a
laboratory containing languages (and native speakers thereof), plants, animals,
history, geology, weather (real live weather, in the sky, not in a book), music,
art , mathematics, physics, engineering, foods, human dynamics, and ideas
without end. Although collections of these treasures have been located in museums
for your convenience, they are to be found everywhere else, too.
This authorizes you to experiment; to trust and enjoy your kids; to rejoice
when your children surpass you in skill, knowledge or wisdom; to make mistakes,
and to say "I don't know." Furthermore, you may allow your children to
experience boredom without taking full responsibility for finding them something to
do.
Henceforth you shall neither be required nor expected to finish everything
you start. Projects, books, experiments and plans may be discontinued as soon as
something more interesting comes along (or for any other reason) without
penalty, and picked up again at any time in the future (or never).
You may reclaim control of your family's daily life, and take what steps you
feel necessary to protect your children from physical, emotional or social
harm.
You have leave to think your own thoughts, and to encourage your children to
think theirs.
Each person who reads and understands this is authorized to extend these
privileges to others, by reproducing and distributing this certificate or by
creating another of his/her own design. Those who don't feel the need to obtain
approval to experiment, to think, or to do things they've never seen others do
are exempt, as they didn't need permission in the first place.
Sandra Dodd
------
It has been published in homeschooling newsletters and borrowed and changed a
big on a couple of other websites. Once, interestingly, all that was added
was "and libraries" after the "in museums" part and I found it really bothered
me. Another time it was quite rewritten for a medical self-help/recovery site.
Anyway, even though I have hundreds printed for the upcoming conferences and
I can't change it at this point, I'm willing to discuss that
question/criticism if the person's still around.
AND, I was wondering if anyone saved a copy of the anti-version that was made
up by unschooling detractors years ago on AOL.
Sandra
Julie Bogart
--- In [email protected], SandraDodd@a... wrote:
One question:
the highly restrictive school-at-home set and they use this same idea to justify all kinds of
limitations for their children (limiting TV, computer time, social events, who they are
friends with and so on).
I know you aren't saying that here, but I'd love you to take this further for the list once
again.
Julie
> CERTIFICATE OF EMPOWERMENTI love this! Will be using it.
One question:
>Can you unpack this for me? How does that look to you as an unschooler? I've been around
> > You may reclaim control of your family's daily life, and take what steps you
> feel necessary to protect your children from physical, emotional or social
> harm.
the highly restrictive school-at-home set and they use this same idea to justify all kinds of
limitations for their children (limiting TV, computer time, social events, who they are
friends with and so on).
I know you aren't saying that here, but I'd love you to take this further for the list once
again.
Julie