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>>>>>>>>>>>>This has not been a huge issue
because her boyfriend lives in Washington (we are in Texas)and they
only see each other every 5 or 6 months. Well .. . .he just turned 18
and is planning to move here. His father has used bribes (money and a
car) to convince him to take his GED and enroll in college. His
father is willing to help him financially as long as he is in school.
His mother is also willing to help with his living expenses. This man
(aahhh! he is a man now) has been in my daughters life for almost 2
years now and they have been discussing living together for the past
6 months or so.

Right now I am managing to remain calm while pointing out that we
will not offer any financial assistance if she chooses to move out. >>>>>>>>

Well, I think that's probably the WORST thing you could posibly do!

Are you also willing to have her leave anyway, end up living in her
boyfriend's car, possibly pregnant because the choice that month was the birth control
pills or groceries, and then never call you again because you were so
insensitive? Because THAT *is* as possibility. It happens every day to girls and boys
all over the country. The USA is full of teens and young adults in that same
boat.

If it were my daughter, I would offer to have her boyfriend bunk with us.
Maybe help him study for the GED and help him enroll in the local univerity or
community/tech college (so his dad will keep his part of the bargain). He could
get a part-time job and go to school. They could share her bedroom (if that's
the deal) or a spare room or whatever.

I would NEVER give an ultimatum that could possibly result in losing my child!

~Kelly


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

txldy2

>
> If it were my daughter, I would offer to have her boyfriend bunk
with us.
> Maybe help him study for the GED and help him enroll in the local
univerity or
> community/tech college (so his dad will keep his part of the
bargain). He could
> get a part-time job and go to school. They could share her bedroom
(if that's
> the deal) or a spare room or whatever.
>
> I would NEVER give an ultimatum that could possibly result in
losing my child!

First of all I never issued an ulitimatum. We have discussed (though
I am sure she knew this already) that we are not in a position to
help her make a rent payment. And the choices are not between having
him "bunk with us" or live in his car. She has already helped him
study for his GED and he passed the test last week. His father wanted
him to get his GED so he has offered a car, money for the move and to
set him up in an apartment if he passed. When I said my daughter was
mature I was not kidding. She has done a lot of thinking on this
issue and has a game plan which doesn't involve living in a car or
going without birth control.

Dedra