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We don't have assigned chores. And Julian is a 14 year old boy who is pretty
oblivious to mess. Rarely does it occur to him to just start cleaning.

However, if I ask him to do something, he is willing and happy to help out.
He often does most of the family laundry, he'll clean litter boxes, empty or
fill the dishwasher, straighten up a room...whatever. When there's a big job
that we'd gladly pay an outside party to do if we had someone available, we offer
to pay Julian (Cleaning the garage gutters comes to mind). Sometimes he tells
us not to bother; he's happy to do it for free.

I'm careful to respect his time when I ask. And I try not to ask him to do
stuff I know he hates. (when I do, it's for an important reason, and he knows
that, and is happy to do it.)

But it's mutual. Julian knows he can ask us to do stuff too, and is
respectful of our time and activities and tries not to ask us to do stuff we hate.
That's the advantage of the one kid/three parent ratio...you can usually find a
willing adult.

Kathryn


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