Gary & Lisa Williams

Date: Thu, 06 Nov 2003 11:06:59 -0500
From: Fetteroll <fetteroll@...>
What if one of your children grew up, had a family and started involving her
family in a cult you'd heard scary things about? Her happiness and
confidence might give you the impression she's still rational, but why would
she be making such irrational, scary and "obviously" wrong decisions?
How much would you be interested in what she was doing with the cult? If you
already knew it was bad, wouldn't anything she said sound like brainwashing?
On the other hand, how much would you be interested in hearing comforting
words that she was coming to her senses and thinking straight again?
They're fishing for those comforting words because they're scared.
Everything they're certain of about what kids need -- and society confirms
it for them -- you're apparently oblivious to.
I liked Susan's answer about blitzing them with what the kids are doing. :-)
That way you aren't allowing yourself to take a defensive position and
proving you're right. You just blaze on ahead with full knowledge that you
are right :-)
Another tactic is to give them inforamtion to read and say you'll be glad to
discuss it when they're done reading.
Joyce

Good points, Joyce. I never thought of it as being scary to
them...cult-like. And they don't really want to hear what I have to say
because they have already determined it is brainwashing or so far from norm
that I don't deserve too much of a conversation over it. I do try to tell
most, that even mention it, that we do this and that and the kids are
learning so much and then at the end of my rah-rah speech, someone will say,
"You're not going to do this through high school?!" I didn't come to
homeschooling from early on like many of you, but when I heard about it, I
researched it and I read about it and then I went further and found
unschooling and then! I found this group! Oh my! But I never said, "Oh,
that's ridiculous." Most people in general aren't very open to new or
different things...
...Makes for boring family get-togethers!, Lisa

Tia Leschke

>
>
>Good points, Joyce. I never thought of it as being scary to
>them...cult-like. And they don't really want to hear what I have to say
>because they have already determined it is brainwashing or so far from norm
>that I don't deserve too much of a conversation over it. I do try to tell
>most, that even mention it, that we do this and that and the kids are
>learning so much and then at the end of my rah-rah speech, someone will say,
>"You're not going to do this through high school?!"

You can always say that it's working well for you now, but you'll take
another look at your decision if it ever seems *to you* that it is no
longer working.
Tia